is this the right way to improve a young person EQ?

[Anonymous]

The only thing worse than having to go to some stupid work conference is having to fake network with some guy’s kid there. No thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Aren't conference venues a much better place to work on both networking and relationship building (e.g. improving EQ) than what listed above? At big conferences where there are thousands of people in attendance, the environment is probably the best place to work on those skills, right?

I'd say no, because the 19 yr/old hasn't earned their way into the conference. EQ is built organically and you're looking for your child to skip a few steps. Focus on the now.

What do you mean by “hasn’t earned their way”?

Conferences are the best way to work on EQ. People at conferences will not turn down a 19 y/o college student. I know I wouldn’t.

No. They’re not. Conferences, especially really big conferences are for the people who are already big in a field to meet and talk. They’re good for random new people to see what the field has to offer. The only way a 19yo is getting any networking or eq development out of conferences is of he’s truly brilliant in the field and is able to ask vendors/presenters really interesting and/or hard-hitting questions. And if he’s that good, attending conferences through academic organizations will still be a better approach because it doesn’t taint him with the whiff of nepotism.

The actual best place to work on people skills is any situation where he’s spending time with a small group of people, the higher stress the better. Community theatre, any kind of competitive environment like debate team, entrepreneurship competitions, etc. are places where college kids really pick up these useful skills (as well as delivery under pressure). Additionally, doing normal college activities is ideal for future networking because it means he’ll be able to bond with future peers and seniors by discussing the kinds of experiences they/their kids had. If you drag him around to these stupid events, you’re putting him in a position where he can’t join in a conversation about frat parties or travelling with friends or cooking in his dorm or the club he was obsessed with like everyone else in the room.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Aren't conference venues a much better place to work on both networking and relationship building (e.g. improving EQ) than what listed above? At big conferences where there are thousands of people in attendance, the environment is probably the best place to work on those skills, right?

I'd say no, because the 19 yr/old hasn't earned their way into the conference. EQ is built organically and you're looking for your child to skip a few steps. Focus on the now.

What do you mean by “hasn’t earned their way”?

Conferences are the best way to work on EQ. People at conferences will not turn down a 19 y/o college student. I know I wouldn’t.

No. They’re not. Conferences, especially really big conferences are for the people who are already big in a field to meet and talk. They’re good for random new people to see what the field has to offer. The only way a 19yo is getting any networking or eq development out of conferences is of he’s truly brilliant in the field and is able to ask vendors/presenters really interesting and/or hard-hitting questions. And if he’s that good, attending conferences through academic organizations will still be a better approach because it doesn’t taint him with the whiff of nepotism.

The actual best place to work on people skills is any situation where he’s spending time with a small group of people, the higher stress the better. Community theatre, any kind of competitive environment like debate team, entrepreneurship competitions, etc. are places where college kids really pick up these useful skills (as well as delivery under pressure). Additionally, doing normal college activities is ideal for future networking because it means he’ll be able to bond with future peers and seniors by discussing the kinds of experiences they/their kids had. If you drag him around to these stupid events, you’re putting him in a position where he can’t join in a conversation about frat parties or travelling with friends or cooking in his dorm or the club he was obsessed with like everyone else in the room.

Disagree with this.

I was an intern at a professional technology service company in 2006 and my second week on the internship, a full-time employee in the group, at the last minute, could not attend the week long Cisco technology conference held in Las Vegas that year, so they asked me if I was interested in going and I said yes. I got to Vegas on Saturday and there was a "get to know everyone" casual drinking event Saturday evening and I went, keeping in mind that I was just an 18 1/2 years old intern. I met many people there and they asked me what I studied in college, my interests, hobbies, etc... It was a fun evening. I met a SVP from another company and after talking to him for about 10 minutes about the technology services his company provides, he gave me his business card and asked me to keep in touch with him for future employment opportunities. One thing I learned from that event was these people love talking about their product, I just need to listen and ask the right question at the right time.

The conference registration began on Sunday with more events to meet people from all tech industries. I don't remember the exact number but probably at least 3000 people attended the conference. I got to meet more people at and after the registration, better food and drinks...

On Monday through Thursday, I got to see new products from Cisco and its 3rd party vendors, I got to talk to a lot of people, and made more contacts. Between 5pm and 8pm M-T, they hosted an event where I got to see many 3rd party vendors, food and drink were provided along with freebies at the event. I got to talk to many people from across industries from technology, healthcare, financial, government, etc... you named it. I also made more contacts. After 8pm, there were party events where I went to meet more people and made even more contacts.

When I got back to my intern job, I started reaching out to about 300 contacts that I made at the conference and I did that throughout my college years. Six months prior to graduation, I started emailing, calling, and texting them for employment opportunities. Out of those 300 contacts, about 280 of them ended up in disappointment but 20 of them were positive. I ended up getting interviews because these folks, at the time, had leverages with the company. I received ten offers and chose one that worked out really well. However, I still kept in touch with the rest and I've changed jobs five times since, and all of the offers I got because of those contacts I made at the conference.

EQ is about "knowing people" and conferences are one of the best places to learn and improve it.

[Anonymous]

OP is looking for agreement, not for advice. So annoying when posters do this, shows a total lack of self-awareness.
It is a poor idea to take your teenager as a plus one to a conference. Vendors and business associates might tolerate but not welcome him.
Very different from the intern poster above who was invited in a professional capacity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP is looking for agreement, not for advice. So annoying when posters do this, shows a total lack of self-awareness.
It is a poor idea to take your teenager as a plus one to a conference. Vendors and business associates might tolerate but not welcome him.
Very different from the intern poster above who was invited in a professional capacity.

At a conference of 3,000 people, how can they tell whether an 18 years old who is invited professionally vs. tagging along? I assume the conference organizer would know but not the 3000 attendees, right? It that sense, it is no difference, correct?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is looking for agreement, not for advice. So annoying when posters do this, shows a total lack of self-awareness.
It is a poor idea to take your teenager as a plus one to a conference. Vendors and business associates might tolerate but not welcome him.
Very different from the intern poster above who was invited in a professional capacity.

At a conference of 3,000 people, how can they tell whether an 18 years old who is invited professionally vs. tagging along? I assume the conference organizer would know but not the 3000 attendees, right? It that sense, it is no difference, correct?

Yet again, OP is looking for agreement, not advice. This is so tiring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only thing worse than having to go to some stupid work conference is having to fake network with some guy’s kid there. No thank you.

And when that kid gets his first real job he's going to be insufferable because he'll think that his opinion matters. Please don't do this OP. Teach him maturity in the ways other posters have mentioned-- debate club, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is looking for agreement, not for advice. So annoying when posters do this, shows a total lack of self-awareness.
It is a poor idea to take your teenager as a plus one to a conference. Vendors and business associates might tolerate but not welcome him.
Very different from the intern poster above who was invited in a professional capacity.

At a conference of 3,000 people, how can they tell whether an 18 years old who is invited professionally vs. tagging along? I assume the conference organizer would know but not the 3000 attendees, right? It that sense, it is no difference, correct?

It doesn’t even matter. An 18 year old has nothing of interest to say to me. Of course I would be polite and kind, but I would be looking for the first opportunity to get away from them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It doesn’t even matter. An 18 year old has nothing of interest to say to me. Of course I would be polite and kind, but I would be looking for the first opportunity to get away from them.

NP. Chillout bommer. An 18 years old definitely knows more about crypto technologies than boomers like you. Have you ever been to crypto conferences? Lots of young people there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It doesn’t even matter. An 18 year old has nothing of interest to say to me. Of course I would be polite and kind, but I would be looking for the first opportunity to get away from them.

NP. Chillout bommer. An 18 years old definitely knows more about crypto technologies than boomers like you. Have you ever been to crypto conferences? Lots of young people there.

Not 18yos who didn’t get their on their own merits

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Aren't conference venues a much better place to work on both networking and relationship building (e.g. improving EQ) than what listed above? At big conferences where there are thousands of people in attendance, the environment is probably the best place to work on those skills, right?

I'd say no, because the 19 yr/old hasn't earned their way into the conference. EQ is built organically and you're looking for your child to skip a few steps. Focus on the now.

What do you mean by “hasn’t earned their way”?

Conferences are the best way to work on EQ. People at conferences will not turn down a 19 y/o college student. I know I wouldn’t.

No. They’re not. Conferences, especially really big conferences are for the people who are already big in a field to meet and talk. They’re good for random new people to see what the field has to offer. The only way a 19yo is getting any networking or eq development out of conferences is of he’s truly brilliant in the field and is able to ask vendors/presenters really interesting and/or hard-hitting questions. And if he’s that good, attending conferences through academic organizations will still be a better approach because it doesn’t taint him with the whiff of nepotism.

The actual best place to work on people skills is any situation where he’s spending time with a small group of people, the higher stress the better. Community theatre, any kind of competitive environment like debate team, entrepreneurship competitions, etc. are places where college kids really pick up these useful skills (as well as delivery under pressure). Additionally, doing normal college activities is ideal for future networking because it means he’ll be able to bond with future peers and seniors by discussing the kinds of experiences they/their kids had. If you drag him around to these stupid events, you’re putting him in a position where he can’t join in a conversation about frat parties or travelling with friends or cooking in his dorm or the club he was obsessed with like everyone else in the room.

Disagree with this.

I was an intern at a professional technology service company in 2006 and my second week on the internship, a full-time employee in the group, at the last minute, could not attend the week long Cisco technology conference held in Las Vegas that year, so they asked me if I was interested in going and I said yes. I got to Vegas on Saturday and there was a "get to know everyone" casual drinking event Saturday evening and I went, keeping in mind that I was just an 18 1/2 years old intern. I met many people there and they asked me what I studied in college, my interests, hobbies, etc... It was a fun evening. I met a SVP from another company and after talking to him for about 10 minutes about the technology services his company provides, he gave me his business card and asked me to keep in touch with him for future employment opportunities. One thing I learned from that event was these people love talking about their product, I just need to listen and ask the right question at the right time.

The conference registration began on Sunday with more events to meet people from all tech industries. I don't remember the exact number but probably at least 3000 people attended the conference. I got to meet more people at and after the registration, better food and drinks...

On Monday through Thursday, I got to see new products from Cisco and its 3rd party vendors, I got to talk to a lot of people, and made more contacts. Between 5pm and 8pm M-T, they hosted an event where I got to see many 3rd party vendors, food and drink were provided along with freebies at the event. I got to talk to many people from across industries from technology, healthcare, financial, government, etc... you named it. I also made more contacts. After 8pm, there were party events where I went to meet more people and made even more contacts.

When I got back to my intern job, I started reaching out to about 300 contacts that I made at the conference and I did that throughout my college years. Six months prior to graduation, I started emailing, calling, and texting them for employment opportunities. Out of those 300 contacts, about 280 of them ended up in disappointment but 20 of them were positive. I ended up getting interviews because these folks, at the time, had leverages with the company. I received ten offers and chose one that worked out really well. However, I still kept in touch with the rest and I've changed jobs five times since, and all of the offers I got because of those contacts I made at the conference.

EQ is about "knowing people" and conferences are one of the best places to learn and improve it.

DP. You are missing the point. As you started off saying, you were an intern at a company that did work relevant to this conference...not a random teenager tagging along with their parent. If OP's kid has genuine interest in the field, he might be able to develop a successful network...but he would still be a lot more successful at this if he were coming with the badge of a company relevant to the field (not his parent's companion).

FWIW, I might be polite and chat with someone's kid, especially if they seemed genuinely interested in and engaged in the field. But overall, I would not consider that networking for me but rather mentorship...and I have plenty of mentees in whom I'm already fairly invested.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DP. You are missing the point. As you started off saying, you were an intern at a company that did work relevant to this conference...not a random teenager tagging along with their parent. If OP's kid has genuine interest in the field, he might be able to develop a successful network...but he would still be a lot more successful at this if he were coming with the badge of a company relevant to the field (not his parent's companion).

FWIW, I might be polite and chat with someone's kid, especially if they seemed genuinely interested in and engaged in the field. But overall, I would not consider that networking for me but rather mentorship...and I have plenty of mentees in whom I'm already fairly invested.

NP. The intern went to the conference his 2nd week on the job. I would venture to say that he had no value to contribute at the conference. OP’s kid is not a teenager, he is a college student.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is looking for agreement, not for advice. So annoying when posters do this, shows a total lack of self-awareness.
It is a poor idea to take your teenager as a plus one to a conference. Vendors and business associates might tolerate but not welcome him.
Very different from the intern poster above who was invited in a professional capacity.

At a conference of 3,000 people, how can they tell whether an 18 years old who is invited professionally vs. tagging along? I assume the conference organizer would know but not the 3000 attendees, right? It that sense, it is no difference, correct?

It doesn’t even matter. An 18 year old has nothing of interest to say to me. Of course I would be polite and kind, but I would be looking for the first opportunity to get away from them.

Wow. I am glad I don’t have to work for people like you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DP. You are missing the point. As you started off saying, you were an intern at a company that did work relevant to this conference...not a random teenager tagging along with their parent. If OP's kid has genuine interest in the field, he might be able to develop a successful network...but he would still be a lot more successful at this if he were coming with the badge of a company relevant to the field (not his parent's companion).

FWIW, I might be polite and chat with someone's kid, especially if they seemed genuinely interested in and engaged in the field. But overall, I would not consider that networking for me but rather mentorship...and I have plenty of mentees in whom I'm already fairly invested.

NP. The intern went to the conference his 2nd week on the job. I would venture to say that he had no value to contribute at the conference. OP’s kid is not a teenager, he is a college student.

Can you please explain how you conclude that OP's son is "not a teenager" when OP describes him as "my eighteen years old college freshman DS." Last I checked, and maybe I'm getting old, but "eighteen" is a teenager, meaning below the age of 20.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP is looking for agreement, not for advice. So annoying when posters do this, shows a total lack of self-awareness.
It is a poor idea to take your teenager as a plus one to a conference. Vendors and business associates might tolerate but not welcome him.
Very different from the intern poster above who was invited in a professional capacity.

At a conference of 3,000 people, how can they tell whether an 18 years old who is invited professionally vs. tagging along? I assume the conference organizer would know but not the 3000 attendees, right? It that sense, it is no difference, correct?

It doesn’t even matter. An 18 year old has nothing of interest to say to me. Of course I would be polite and kind, but I would be looking for the first opportunity to get away from them.

Wow. I am glad I don’t have to work for people like you.

DP. My employer doesn't pay me to entertain your child.