Has anyone here retired early on a lean budget (or plan to)?

[Anonymous]

We are early 40's and have $3M in assets, not counting our paid off home and fully funded 529s. We spend way less per month than current income. I keep trying to get spouse to majorly downshift his stressful job but he keeps insisting he is "overqualified" and he won't be able to get hired somewhere at a lower level. I wish he would try. I was a SAHM and now work part-time for peanuts. We live a simple but comfortable life plus my spouse is also going to get a multimillion dollar inheritance. He knows and agrees with all of this academically but can't bring himself to improve his situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are early 40's and have $3M in assets, not counting our paid off home and fully funded 529s. We spend way less per month than current income. I keep trying to get spouse to majorly downshift his stressful job but he keeps insisting he is "overqualified" and he won't be able to get hired somewhere at a lower level. I wish he would try. I was a SAHM and now work part-time for peanuts. We live a simple but comfortable life plus my spouse is also going to get a multimillion dollar inheritance. He knows and agrees with all of this academically but can't bring himself to improve his situation.

I feel the same way as your husband. Not only am I “overqualified” for a lower level job, but younger folks may be better at it by now than I am. And all positions that actually leverage my experience and seniority are stressful.

[Anonymous]

Mine is easy: I need $5000 a month to live on. All this comes monthly from, lets call it, annuity. I also have an option of going back to work the next day, decent investment portfolio, paid off car, health insurance, emergency fund, and a lot more.
Do you math, talk to DH and go for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are early 40's and have $3M in assets, not counting our paid off home and fully funded 529s. We spend way less per month than current income. I keep trying to get spouse to majorly downshift his stressful job but he keeps insisting he is "overqualified" and he won't be able to get hired somewhere at a lower level. I wish he would try. I was a SAHM and now work part-time for peanuts. We live a simple but comfortable life plus my spouse is also going to get a multimillion dollar inheritance. He knows and agrees with all of this academically but can't bring himself to improve his situation.

I feel the same way as your husband. Not only am I “overqualified” for a lower level job, but younger folks may be better at it by now than I am. And all positions that actually leverage my experience and seniority are stressful.

+1 This is a common situation. There's often not an easy way to "downshift."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are early 40's and have $3M in assets, not counting our paid off home and fully funded 529s. We spend way less per month than current income. I keep trying to get spouse to majorly downshift his stressful job but he keeps insisting he is "overqualified" and he won't be able to get hired somewhere at a lower level. I wish he would try. I was a SAHM and now work part-time for peanuts. We live a simple but comfortable life plus my spouse is also going to get a multimillion dollar inheritance. He knows and agrees with all of this academically but can't bring himself to improve his situation.

I feel the same way as your husband. Not only am I “overqualified” for a lower level job, but younger folks may be better at it by now than I am. And all positions that actually leverage my experience and seniority are stressful.

+1 This is a common situation. There's often not an easy way to "downshift."

Another vote here. My DH wanted to downshift and actually tried when his tech company sold. They only wanted him for C-suite. A friend told him the younger guys don't want to have you report to them because of your status. Plus, frankly, it looks weird. So he is back in a C-suite position. We are just shy of 10m in assets, but he has zero interest in hanging out and playing golf or whatever. I likes to be connected to people who are making things happen. So his mentality is to not slow down.

[Anonymous]

^^when I say "his", I mean the tech co he worked for.

[Anonymous]

Op I think you could do this. Try to secure a flex independent professional job first.

That way you have a little something coming in.

This is another possibility: always have 2 of these going at once (20h for one, 20h for the other, more or less) Could do 30+10, or some variation. So you can rely on hopefully one to stick even if the other dissipates. If one does dissipate, you pick up another small flex job.

Whatever industry and work you are in, start there.

If you get one going, retire. Then pick up another.

I’m a Sahm returning, and I have 2 things like this going. Flexible quantity of hours, so I put in what I can fit in, what I feel like earning. About 20-30 hours I am doing right now in one job. The other is my own freelance so I have complete control of hours. Would like to shift more into that, drop off fewer hours in the other and keep the other thing going a little bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op I think you could do this. Try to secure a flex independent professional job first.

That way you have a little something coming in.

This is another possibility: always have 2 of these going at once (20h for one, 20h for the other, more or less) Could do 30+10, or some variation. So you can rely on hopefully one to stick even if the other dissipates. If one does dissipate, you pick up another small flex job.

Whatever industry and work you are in, start there.

If you get one going, retire. Then pick up another.

I’m a Sahm returning, and I have 2 things like this going. Flexible quantity of hours, so I put in what I can fit in, what I feel like earning. About 20-30 hours I am doing right now in one job. The other is my own freelance so I have complete control of hours. Would like to shift more into that, drop off fewer hours in the other and keep the other thing going a little bit.

Me again, I was on a walk the other day and thought about this deeply. A lot of Americans could benefit by working 2 part-time jobs. *If it fits for them.* Definitely stages where you want full-time with traditional benefits.

You can calculate whether you like one job better than the other. You can calculate which pays more and lean into it. You can work them both for a while until your contract is up and the employer lets you go. You can drop one and try out something else.

My DH is FT (well, 4.25 days per week), but the “sub” rate is incredible.

When he wants to retire, he’ll transition that work. A lot fewer hours for more pay, but having to set up his own benefits. I think it would be good for him to take this two-prong approach. Have a couple of things going so he can pivot, drop, be flexible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I'm 35.

There's an early retirement movement where entire families retire on investment portfolios of $600k - $1.5m and live frugally forever. That's seeming increasingly more attractive by the day.

My situation would be different because my spouse plans on continuing working, but I don't want resentment to seep in.

1.5M is enough to live in India/Mexico and dozens of other places in the world. Consider divorcing spouse and moving there.

[Anonymous]

PP above, sorry I was harsh, but seriously no way to guarantee that resentment would not seep in the marriage tomorrow or 10 years later. Take a year off and reassess

[Anonymous]

Everyone always forgets inflation. When you factor in inflation, you realize you need a lot more than you think you need.

[Anonymous]

I quit a high paying job several months ago, in mid-40s, and DH keeps telling everyone that I retired. I so much don’t want to work ever again, as there are so many fun activities that are free. For example, free live fitness classes on Zoom, free movies at the community center, free movies and events at the embassies, and free walks and bike rides with family and friends. I take some free history classes and also Spanish classes (not free but very affordable). Our mortgage is paid off. We have 2 kids that are already adults and quite independent financially.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Everyone always forgets inflation. When you factor in inflation, you realize you need a lot more than you think you need.

+1 yep. Look at the past year.

Also, I agree that OP wants to be a sahm. Do you guys not share finances? Will your DH not support you "retiring"? How will you pay for healthcare? That is very very expensive.

Does your DH love his job? Or would he eventually become resentful, as others are saying?

I know my DH would resent it if I quit, and I have $1.4 mil at 53 yrs of age, because he also wants to retire, and he has about the same retirement savings as me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op I think you could do this. Try to secure a flex independent professional job first.

That way you have a little something coming in.

This is another possibility: always have 2 of these going at once (20h for one, 20h for the other, more or less) Could do 30+10, or some variation. So you can rely on hopefully one to stick even if the other dissipates. If one does dissipate, you pick up another small flex job.

Whatever industry and work you are in, start there.

If you get one going, retire. Then pick up another.

I’m a Sahm returning, and I have 2 things like this going. Flexible quantity of hours, so I put in what I can fit in, what I feel like earning. About 20-30 hours I am doing right now in one job. The other is my own freelance so I have complete control of hours. Would like to shift more into that, drop off fewer hours in the other and keep the other thing going a little bit.

Umm, while I appreciate your unbridled optimism what are you basing this on? The only concrete facts Op had shared is that she is 35, burnt out from her job and has a husband with no near term retirement plans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One spouse retiring early has caused resentment in our marriage. We regret it. YMMV.

Is the retired spouse much older? Have a particularly stressful job? Make most of the nest egg? If so, the resentment may be unwarranted.