How much money is typical to give to a cousin for a wedding gift?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, regular people really give $500 wedding gifts to cousins?

I'm way out of my league here.

These are the top 1-2%-ers that make $250K or more HHI and consider themselves middle class because they buy million dollar houses and then can only go on European vacations once per year.

If you can afford it $200. If you can't $150 or $100. Those are more normal UMC and MC presents.

Wrong. I don’t make six figures. But I think weddings are special and will save for them. I will go without things for myself for 4-6 months, pick up extra gig work at night and on weekends, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, regular people really give $500 wedding gifts to cousins?

I'm way out of my league here.

It has nothing to do with your league.

Regular people easily spend $500 for a couple's massage and dinner on Valentine's Day. So it is not a question of affordability. It is only a question of being generous to others. Only in a culture that is encouraged to be self-centered and individualistic will one balk at gifting $500 on the occasion of a cousin's wedding. Especially when 4 people are attending and the wedding is doubling as a family reunion. How much of a BOGO bargain do you want??

It is a very small amount for most of DCUM, but a huge amount for small people. It has nothing to do with how big is your wallet. It has everything to do with your mindset and how big hearted you are.

Wow. Wow wow wow.

I hope you aren't this angry and judgmental for the rest of your life.

[Anonymous]

$300-400 total in your situation. Less if not close.

[Anonymous]

I give a flat $300 for DH and I to attend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, regular people really give $500 wedding gifts to cousins? I'm way out of my league here.

We think weddings (and bar/bat mitzvahs) are special and even if we have to forego other things and save for several months, we pull together a nice gift.

And some people are barely making ends meet and don’t have the ability to pull together a nice gift. Privilege.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, regular people really give $500 wedding gifts to cousins?

I'm way out of my league here.

These are the top 1-2%-ers that make $250K or more HHI and consider themselves middle class because they buy million dollar houses and then can only go on European vacations once per year.

If you can afford it $200. If you can't $150 or $100. Those are more normal UMC and MC presents.

Wrong. I don’t make six figures. But I think weddings are special and will save for them. I will go without things for myself for 4-6 months, pick up extra gig work at night and on weekends, etc.

You don’t sound generous, you sound foolish but want to make sure people see you as generous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, regular people really give $500 wedding gifts to cousins?

I'm way out of my league here.

These are the top 1-2%-ers that make $250K or more HHI and consider themselves middle class because they buy million dollar houses and then can only go on European vacations once per year.

If you can afford it $200. If you can't $150 or $100. Those are more normal UMC and MC presents.

Wrong. I don’t make six figures. But I think weddings are special and will save for them. I will go without things for myself for 4-6 months, pick up extra gig work at night and on weekends, etc.

You don’t sound generous, you sound foolish but want to make sure people see you as generous.

Show offy and stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:i give nothing for a second wedding as I do not attend but even if I did attend, it would be a token gift. It is tacky to expect gifts for second weddings just as it is tacky to expect gifts for second or more babies.

OP here. I appreciate everyone’s input and different perspectives. I don’t think the couple is expecting anything. They didn’t register and overall, are very generous people. They will be treating the entire family to a dinner and brunch as well as the wedding. We can easily afford $500. Yes, that makes us privileged. I don’t mind giving that amount and was looking for input on an amount that was good but not over the top. Most seem to agree on this.

[Anonymous]

If I'm living paycheck to paycheck and always seem to be low on cash, I probably just give $100 for 4 people. If I have a bit more money and not struggling, I would go with $400 for 4 people.
If I am not even surviving on paycheck to paycheck, i would just not go. If family insist I go, I would just go as 1 person or 2 people, write a check for $75.

And if you haven't talked to the cousins for over a few years, but the family still insist you go, I will still just give no more than $100.

[Anonymous]

What if you are not high earners and have to fly to the wedding & rent a hotel room?

NP here. 2 adults, HHI 160k & shelling out over a grand just to attend.

Not planning to give a high cash gift.