How much money is typical to give to a cousin for a wedding gift?

[Anonymous]

I know the answer is it varies and what you can afford but can you help me out? I haven’t been to a wedding in 20 years and want to be generous but not over the top.

I don’t know if the details matter. It’s a second wedding and we are attending with our two teens, 4 people total. The reception is both of the extended families at a very nice hotel, where all of us are staying since no one lives locally.

I don’t have any idea what is typical. We will give a check, not a gift.

[Anonymous]

We give $500.

[Anonymous]

$500

[Anonymous]

How much did you give for the first wedding?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We give $500.

Not for a second wedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We give $500.

Not for a second wedding.

Yeah, but 4 people attending including 2 teens. $500.

[Anonymous]

I always try to cover the cost of our attendance, plus some. So yeah, with 4 attending, I'd say the PPs recommending 500 are right. If I declined to attend, I'd send a card with less.

[Anonymous]

$200 since you have to stay in a hotel and probably get two rooms.

The cost of your attendance is the hotel. Not the reception -- that's on the bride/groom.

[Anonymous]

How close are you? If this is a distant cousin and there is family pressure to show up even though you aren't close I think $250-300 for 4 people is fine. You don't have to cover a meal and you don't have much of a choice.

If you are very close and you feel you will remain close (get along well with spouse) and you can afford it $400-600.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How much did you give for the first wedding?

I have no idea. It was about 30 years ago (I think) and I was in college. I don’t remember and most likely my name was added to the card and check my parents gave. They had a small last minute destination wedding for that and most of the family didn’t attend.

It sounds like most think $500 is appropriate. That sounds reasonable. Thank you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How close are you? If this is a distant cousin and there is family pressure to show up even though you aren't close I think $250-300 for 4 people is fine. You don't have to cover a meal and you don't have much of a choice.

If you are very close and you feel you will remain close (get along well with spouse) and you can afford it $400-600.

OP again. We aren’t sibling close since we have never lived in the same place our entire lives but probably my closest cousin. We text every few months and see each other every couple of years. It doesn’t sound like a lot but we don’t live in the same part of the country so it takes effort.

[Anonymous]

OP once again. I know it’s unusual for a second wedding but all of us on both sides are treating this like a huge family reunion since we are getting older and only get everyone together at funerals now. I’ll give $500

[Anonymous]

Wow, regular people really give $500 wedding gifts to cousins?

I'm way out of my league here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We give $500.

Not for a second wedding.

J
Yeah, but 4 people attending including 2 teens. $500.

This.

[Anonymous]

If depends if you’re close or driving or flying. If you’re spending $1000 minimum flying for four people + car rental + hotel at least 2 nights, that adds up. I’m not counting the meals outside of reception because you’d have to eat whatever you are. Also if you have growing childre and there is a dress code for which you have to spend additional money, ex. boys w/dress suits and shoes, that adds up too.

I’d say depending on how close you are $100 minimum if you’re having to spend all of the above. If close in proximity thus no travel costs, then up it to $2-300.