Montgomery County MD Schools- A Horrific Nightmare

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you really conflating rape with sex ed and students being allowed to decide when/if to disclose being trans to their parents?

That makes it hard to take you seriously.

I'm just saying that it's pretty sketchy that a school system that has massive problems with sexual assault by teachers and students and administrators would seek to impose explicit sex ed on elementary school students with no parental opt-out allowed, and also seek to cut parents out of being informed of their own young children transitioning genders.

My kid's sex ed in fifth grade sure wasn't explicit. Way less than my own in elementary school.

And for obvious safety reasons, teachers shouldn't have to tell parents a child is using a different pronoun or holding hands with a kid of the same sex. Depending on the child's home situation, doing so could endanger them.

Under MCPS's policy, the child can be fully transitioned to other students and staff and the parents would literally be the last people in the student's life to know- even if the child is as young as 6 years old. The janitors would know before the parents. Even the crazy guidelines on how to "accept" your trans child say that for younger children, more parental support may be needed. The new policy is more extreme than even the materials on the MCPS website. And parents have a constitutional right to direct their children's upbringing.

GTFO with this troll nonsense. You clearly have never been around children, much less have your own (thank goodness). Elementary and middle school kids can’t buy their own clothes, cut their hair, or accomplish anything medical without parental involvement. I don’t know what fantasy world you live in, but you need help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Focus on being the kind of parent whose kids feels safe disclosing that they’re questioning their gender or sexual identity and you’ll never have to worry that MCPS is hiding information from you.

NP here. I agree with what you said, but are you holding the same ooinion about not telling parents if a child is failing? Cheated on a major test? Is bullying other students? Hit a teacher? There are many parents who would react in an extremely negative manner if they knew about the kinds of behaviors I mentioned. Where do you draw the line?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Focus on being the kind of parent whose kids feels safe disclosing that they’re questioning their gender or sexual identity and you’ll never have to worry that MCPS is hiding information from you.

NP here. I agree with what you said, but are you holding the same ooinion about not telling parents if a child is failing? Cheated on a major test? Is bullying other students? Hit a teacher? There are many parents who would react in an extremely negative manner if they knew about the kinds of behaviors I mentioned. Where do you draw the line?

You're comparing gender identity to failing in class, cheating on a major test, bullying students, and hitting a teacher. Stop doing that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Focus on being the kind of parent whose kids feels safe disclosing that they’re questioning their gender or sexual identity and you’ll never have to worry that MCPS is hiding information from you.

NP here. I agree with what you said, but are you holding the same ooinion about not telling parents if a child is failing? Cheated on a major test? Is bullying other students? Hit a teacher? There are many parents who would react in an extremely negative manner if they knew about the kinds of behaviors I mentioned. Where do you draw the line?

You're comparing gender identity to failing in class, cheating on a major test, bullying students, and hitting a teacher. Stop doing that.

PP here. I'm really not trying to make them comparable. I'm just referring to the rationale that parents might harm their children if they were told. Is that the only reason parents aren't being told?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What kind of parent would not know their 6 year old is transitioning? One who never goes to a class party or field trip, never attends after school events, never goes to the bus stop, never hosts play dates and never talks to the parents or their kid’s friends, and never really talks to their own child, I guess. If such a parent exists, I wouldn’t tell them anything about their poor kid either. This is just such a stupid non issue.

What kind of parent? What about a single parent who has to work nights and weekends to feed their children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Focus on being the kind of parent whose kids feels safe disclosing that they’re questioning their gender or sexual identity and you’ll never have to worry that MCPS is hiding information from you.

NP here. I agree with what you said, but are you holding the same ooinion about not telling parents if a child is failing? Cheated on a major test? Is bullying other students? Hit a teacher? There are many parents who would react in an extremely negative manner if they knew about the kinds of behaviors I mentioned. Where do you draw the line?

You're comparing gender identity to failing in class, cheating on a major test, bullying students, and hitting a teacher. Stop doing that.

PP here. I'm really not trying to make them comparable. I'm just referring to the rationale that parents might harm their children if they were told. Is that the only reason parents aren't being told?

But you did. And they're not comparable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you really conflating rape with sex ed and students being allowed to decide when/if to disclose being trans to their parents?

That makes it hard to take you seriously.

I'm just saying that it's pretty sketchy that a school system that has massive problems with sexual assault by teachers and students and administrators would seek to impose explicit sex ed on elementary school students with no parental opt-out allowed, and also seek to cut parents out of being informed of their own young children transitioning genders.

My kid's sex ed in fifth grade sure wasn't explicit. Way less than my own in elementary school.

And for obvious safety reasons, teachers shouldn't have to tell parents a child is using a different pronoun or holding hands with a kid of the same sex. Depending on the child's home situation, doing so could endanger them.

Under MCPS's policy, the child can be fully transitioned to other students and staff and the parents would literally be the last people in the student's life to know- even if the child is as young as 6 years old. The janitors would know before the parents. Even the crazy guidelines on how to "accept" your trans child say that for younger children, more parental support may be needed. The new policy is more extreme than even the materials on the MCPS website. And parents have a constitutional right to direct their children's upbringing.

If you are “directing” your child’s upbringing but they don’t feel like they can tell you who they really are, please deal with your own issues. Putting “accept” in quotes is a tell.

An MCPS school can put together a detailed transition plan for my child and directed everyone at the school to call them by their new name, and not tell the parent. That is the policy. How angry would you be if a school has put together a life plan for your six year old without your input?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I have three kids who have been in 5 different McPS schools. They certainly aren’t perfect but they are very very far from the hellscape you describe. As is often the case, information on the internet tends to magnify controversy. That’s how a site gets clicks which is how they generate revenue. Real life is much more nuanced than the world on the internet.

I am grateful that you acknowledge that what I am describing is indeed a hellscape and also that your experience isn't so bad!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you really conflating rape with sex ed and students being allowed to decide when/if to disclose being trans to their parents?

That makes it hard to take you seriously.

I'm just saying that it's pretty sketchy that a school system that has massive problems with sexual assault by teachers and students and administrators would seek to impose explicit sex ed on elementary school students with no parental opt-out allowed, and also seek to cut parents out of being informed of their own young children transitioning genders.

My kid's sex ed in fifth grade sure wasn't explicit. Way less than my own in elementary school.

And for obvious safety reasons, teachers shouldn't have to tell parents a child is using a different pronoun or holding hands with a kid of the same sex. Depending on the child's home situation, doing so could endanger them.

Under MCPS's policy, the child can be fully transitioned to other students and staff and the parents would literally be the last people in the student's life to know- even if the child is as young as 6 years old. The janitors would know before the parents. Even the crazy guidelines on how to "accept" your trans child say that for younger children, more parental support may be needed. The new policy is more extreme than even the materials on the MCPS website. And parents have a constitutional right to direct their children's upbringing.

GTFO with this troll nonsense. You clearly have never been around children, much less have your own (thank goodness). Elementary and middle school kids can’t buy their own clothes, cut their hair, or accomplish anything medical without parental involvement. I don’t know what fantasy world you live in, but you need help.

The MCPS policy says that young children can socially transition and the parents are not told- that may strike you as impracticable, but that's what the policy says.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you really conflating rape with sex ed and students being allowed to decide when/if to disclose being trans to their parents?

That makes it hard to take you seriously.

I'm just saying that it's pretty sketchy that a school system that has massive problems with sexual assault by teachers and students and administrators would seek to impose explicit sex ed on elementary school students with no parental opt-out allowed, and also seek to cut parents out of being informed of their own young children transitioning genders.

My kid's sex ed in fifth grade sure wasn't explicit. Way less than my own in elementary school.

And for obvious safety reasons, teachers shouldn't have to tell parents a child is using a different pronoun or holding hands with a kid of the same sex. Depending on the child's home situation, doing so could endanger them.

Under MCPS's policy, the child can be fully transitioned to other students and staff and the parents would literally be the last people in the student's life to know- even if the child is as young as 6 years old. The janitors would know before the parents. Even the crazy guidelines on how to "accept" your trans child say that for younger children, more parental support may be needed. The new policy is more extreme than even the materials on the MCPS website. And parents have a constitutional right to direct their children's upbringing.

If you are “directing” your child’s upbringing but they don’t feel like they can tell you who they really are, please deal with your own issues. Putting “accept” in quotes is a tell.

An MCPS school can put together a detailed transition plan for my child and directed everyone at the school to call them by their new name, and not tell the parent. That is the policy. How angry would you be if a school has put together a life plan for your six year old without your input?

How angry would you be if a school has given your fish a bicycle without your input?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of parent would not know their 6 year old is transitioning? One who never goes to a class party or field trip, never attends after school events, never goes to the bus stop, never hosts play dates and never talks to the parents or their kid’s friends, and never really talks to their own child, I guess. If such a parent exists, I wouldn’t tell them anything about their poor kid either. This is just such a stupid non issue.

What kind of parent? What about a single parent who has to work nights and weekends to feed their children.

I'm a single parent who works nights and weekends. I know my child is trans because they talk to me, and because I read school correspondence where their name and gender Identity are clearly stated.

Stop using moms like me as your hypotheticals. We are real people and we're fully caught up with our kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Focus on being the kind of parent whose kids feels safe disclosing that they’re questioning their gender or sexual identity and you’ll never have to worry that MCPS is hiding information from you.

NP here. I agree with what you said, but are you holding the same ooinion about not telling parents if a child is failing? Cheated on a major test? Is bullying other students? Hit a teacher? There are many parents who would react in an extremely negative manner if they knew about the kinds of behaviors I mentioned. Where do you draw the line?

You're comparing gender identity to failing in class, cheating on a major test, bullying students, and hitting a teacher. Stop doing that.

PP here. I'm really not trying to make them comparable. I'm just referring to the rationale that parents might harm their children if they were told. Is that the only reason parents aren't being told?

Except it's objectively bad to fail, to cheat, to bully, to hit. Those are things your kids would get in trouble for or at least get a bad report card about. It's not objectively bad to transition or to be gay.

[Anonymous]

Under the Guidelines, a student wishing to develop and implement a transition plan fills out an intake form on which the student is asked to rate the level of parental support the student expects, on a scale from 1 to 10. If the support level is deemed inadequate and the student so desires, the student is assured that the student’s parents will not be told about the development and implementation of the plan. The Guidelines do not indicate that any particular score suffices for a student’s parents to be deemed “unsupportive” but instead direct staff members to make that determination by considering both the information in the form and any other information gathered from consultation with the student. The Guidelines explain the reason for excluding parents as follows:

In some cases, transgender and gender nonconforming students may not openly express their gender identity at home because of safety concerns or lack of acceptance. Matters of gender identity can be complex and may involve familial conflict. Accordingly, the Guidelines explicitly prohibit disclosure of the student’s status “to other students, their parents/guardians, or third persons.”

Moreover, when parents are being excluded from the development and implementation of a transition plan, the Guidelines direct staff to engage in a form of coverup by providing that “[s]chools should seek to minimize the use of permission slips and other school-specific forms that require disclosure of a student’s gender or use gendered terminology” and that “[u]nless the student or parent/guardian has specified otherwise, when contacting the parent/guardian of a transgender student, [Montgomery County] school staff members should use the student’s legal name and pronoun that correspond to the student’s sex assigned at birth.” The transition plans that are developed and implemented under the Guidelines include changing names and pronouns; requiring staff to comply with the use of such names and pronouns; changing school records; giving students the “right to dress in a manner consistent with their gender identity”; providing access to “gender-separated areas,” e.g., “bathrooms, locker rooms, and changing rooms”; providing access to classes and sports, in-school athletics, and clubs in accordance with the student’s new gender identity; promising special arrangements for “outdoor education/overnight field trips,” ncluding sleeping arrangements; and providing safe places and other similar accommodations.

Finally, the Guidelines direct staff to “understand implicit bias, promote diversity awareness, and consider the risk of self-harm or the presence of suicidal ideation.” And they encourage schools “to have age-appropriate student organizations develop and lead programs to address issues of bullying prevention for all students, with emphasis on LGBTQ+ students.”

The Guidelines are not voluntary and instead apply mandatorily to all students in the school system, regardless of age, and all students are thus engaged with staff to help, as the Guidelines state, eliminate bullying, harassment, and discrimination based on gender, gender identity, gender expression, and sexual orientation.

The culture of accountability to parents and not activist groups has to start here, with the basic question of whether the school may facilitate the student's gender transition. The schools must be accountable to the parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What kind of parent would not know their 6 year old is transitioning? One who never goes to a class party or field trip, never attends after school events, never goes to the bus stop, never hosts play dates and never talks to the parents or their kid’s friends, and never really talks to their own child, I guess. If such a parent exists, I wouldn’t tell them anything about their poor kid either. This is just such a stupid non issue.

What kind of parent? What about a single parent who has to work nights and weekends to feed their children.

I'm a single parent who works nights and weekends. I know my child is trans because they talk to me, and because I read school correspondence where their name and gender Identity are clearly stated.

Stop using moms like me as your hypotheticals. We are real people and we're fully caught up with our kids.

The Guidelines state that the school may intentionally cover up the child's gender identity in correspondence to you, so you don't learn about the transition. Are you comfortable with that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Focus on being the kind of parent whose kids feels safe disclosing that they’re questioning their gender or sexual identity and you’ll never have to worry that MCPS is hiding information from you.

NP here. I agree with what you said, but are you holding the same ooinion about not telling parents if a child is failing? Cheated on a major test? Is bullying other students? Hit a teacher? There are many parents who would react in an extremely negative manner if they knew about the kinds of behaviors I mentioned. Where do you draw the line?

You're comparing gender identity to failing in class, cheating on a major test, bullying students, and hitting a teacher. Stop doing that.

PP here. I'm really not trying to make them comparable. I'm just referring to the rationale that parents might harm their children if they were told. Is that the only reason parents aren't being told?

Except it's objectively bad to fail, to cheat, to bully, to hit. Those are things your kids would get in trouble for or at least get a bad report card about. It's not objectively bad to transition or to be gay.

What about being sexually assaulted by a teacher or another student? It's not something your kid would get in trouble for or get a bad report card for, but the school should tell you about it.

What about collapsing in the bathroom while drunk or high? Totally legal under Maryland law, but you would still want to know as a parent.