Catholic School for Non-Catholic/Non-Christian Families

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can I ask what Arlington middle school your kids would go to? I’m asking because what you are describing has not been our kids’ experiences in APS at all.

They don't go to middle school yet. They are in elementary school. I'm concerned about lowered academic standards (especially when it comes to writing) and disciplinary issues. I may be wrong so feel free to convince me otherwise!

I’m the poster you are responding to. With the caveat that middle school tends to be the worst school experience for many kids, my kid who recently completed middle school had a positive experience. DC made a lot of new friends, was challenged academically, grew emotionally, and did very well. He’s had several lengthy writing assignments and I’ve seen his writing evolve and improve over the last three years. I do think some of this depends on the kid and the support they receive at home—my kid is strong academically and very driven and as a result may have avoided some of the problems you referenced (because a school experience may depend on the crowd a kid runs with). I also appreciate that Arlington is a diverse place with several different middle schools, and so my kid’s experience might have been different if they went to a different school (though, to be honest, I don’t think so based on what I know of my kid).

Have you spoken with parents of kids at your future middle school? That may provide more accurate information than this forum. (The same is true for any Catholic schools you might be considering—I would suggest speaking to some parents directly about their experiences).

OP here. Thanks! This makes me less worried. Do you mind sharing which middle school your child is in? Also was your child in general ed or honors classes? My understanding is that the experience is vastly different depending on which classes your kid takes. I have one child who is gifted so no doubt she will be able to handle the rigorous honors classes. But worried about my other child ending up in general ed.

Williamsburg Middle School. At the time, the only intensified (honors) classes available were in math, so by default all other classes were general education (this is changing starting next year, so I can’t speak to what it will be like in the future).

Regarding your other post, DC read multiple novels; kids were required to leave their cell phones in their lockers during the day (so no access to phones); no standards based grading—to the contrary, kids that DC hung out with all tried to get As; quizzes etc were graded (I will confess DC did not have a lot of homework).

OP here. Thanks! We are zoned to Williamsburg as well so this is all good to know! Need to do more research then and maybe my assumptions are incorrect

[Anonymous]

We just moved from a catholic k-8 and one of the main reasons was the behavior was so out of control that not enough learning was happening in the classroom. While it was less expensive than other area privates, I continued to be angry that I was paying for something I could probably have gotten in the local public.

I know not all are created equal. I say this to stress that you really need to research. Ask how they handle discipline and have your children visit the class with the kids they will be with. I'd also ask about teacher attrition. If the teachers are leaving every couple years - red flag.

[Anonymous]

OP, when you narrow down your choices do check about rates, which should be available online. We were non-Catholics in a parish school. There were three categories and the rates increased in each: First category was Catholic, Registered Parishioner; second category (more expensive) was Catholic, Non-Registered Parishioner; and third was "Other Faith." We paid about $10K more than category 1 and $6K more than category 2.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Catholic high school teacher here. Catholic schools vary widely, so I can only speak from my experience.

The school I work at is about 50% Catholic. The student population includes some Muslim and Jewish students, as well as a substantial number of non-religious students. The students appear to be very accepting of one another, and I can’t think of an instance during which a student was excluded or picked on because of their faith. The school makes a big effort to meet students where they are on their faith journey, and they intentionally don’t specify it has to be a Catholic journey.

Students are required to attend Mass monthly, but once again there is an intentional effort to include the entire student population. Only Catholic students can participate in the Eucharist because that’s a major tenet of the Catholic faith, but the remainder of the service is very inclusive (homilies, music, etc). Students also are required to take religion all four years, but it is opened up to world religions by junior year. My own child learned about Islam last year.

Academics are strong. Discipline is also strong. The school doesn’t tolerate behavior that negatively impacts the academic environment.

I say this to illustrate that Catholic schools can work well for students of other faiths. I’ve seen it. The problem is, like all things in life, not all schools are equal. I recommend visiting schools to get a good feel for the environment.

This sounds similar to St. Anselm's Abbey (about 60% Catholic last I heard). There are also Muslim and Jewish teachers, among other faiths. If you have a son, OP, it is a boys' school that starts in 6th grade. Arabic is the most popular modern language the boys take there (they all must also take Latin), so your child has that option as well if it interests him. It is in DC, but they have a Virginia bus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We just moved from a catholic k-8 and one of the main reasons was the behavior was so out of control that not enough learning was happening in the classroom. While it was less expensive than other area privates, I continued to be angry that I was paying for something I could probably have gotten in the local public.

I know not all are created equal. I say this to stress that you really need to research. Ask how they handle discipline and have your children visit the class with the kids they will be with. I'd also ask about teacher attrition. If the teachers are leaving every couple years - red flag.

Would you mind sharing which Catholic school you left?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have slowly come to the conclusion that we cannot in good conscience send our kids to public for middle school. We are in Arlington and standards, especially behavioral standards have deteriorated. Disciplinary problems are rampant. Kids take pictures of other kids while using the bathroom and admin does nothing about it. Drug deals happen in school and students come to class high. I’m looking for a school that focuses strictly on academics and discipline. Unfortunately we cannot afford the expensive private secular schools for our three kids and someone suggested looking at catholic schools. The problem? We aren’t even Christian. We are Muslims of Arab origin. While we am more on the liberal side (don’t cover my hair etc) we still are practicing. Would my kids even be able to get into catholic school and if they can would they be welcome? We share a lot of things with Christians when it comes to faith but obviously do not believe that Jesus is the son of God. How much are particular religious beliefs emphasized in school? No issue with that of course but it might not be the right fit and my kids would stick out. Alternatively are there secular private schools that emphasize traditional methods of instruction and are also welcoming to minorities? Thank you so much.

Secular is better for minorities

And unless you believe in their doctrine and lack of science and math not sure this is righ5 place

[Anonymous]

Hi OP. Every Catholic school is different and has their own culture. I imagine families at Catholic schools will be welcoming to students of all faiths.

Just know that the Arlington Archdiocese as a whole is pretty conservative. The Catholic school goal is to form good people and education is almost secondary to that goal. Are you comfortable with your children starting and ending their day with prayer, praying before meals, attending Mass on a regular basis, having a lot of religious instruction etc? The school community often centers around the parish/church and many times the school is overseen by the parish priests. My protestant DH went to a Christian school and finds the Catholic school culture a little overwhelming.

Based on your comments about writing, you might also might want to consider a Catholic or Christian classical education school. My kids don't attend one, but we considered it and have friends that value that curriculum and approach.

Good luck in making your decision! Just start talking to schools asap for next year's enrollment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have slowly come to the conclusion that we cannot in good conscience send our kids to public for middle school. We are in Arlington and standards, especially behavioral standards have deteriorated. Disciplinary problems are rampant. Kids take pictures of other kids while using the bathroom and admin does nothing about it. Drug deals happen in school and students come to class high. I’m looking for a school that focuses strictly on academics and discipline. Unfortunately we cannot afford the expensive private secular schools for our three kids and someone suggested looking at catholic schools. The problem? We aren’t even Christian. We are Muslims of Arab origin. While we am more on the liberal side (don’t cover my hair etc) we still are practicing. Would my kids even be able to get into catholic school and if they can would they be welcome? We share a lot of things with Christians when it comes to faith but obviously do not believe that Jesus is the son of God. How much are particular religious beliefs emphasized in school? No issue with that of course but it might not be the right fit and my kids would stick out. Alternatively are there secular private schools that emphasize traditional methods of instruction and are also welcoming to minorities? Thank you so much.

Secular is better for minorities

And unless you believe in their doctrine and lack of science and math not sure this is righ5 place

Lack of science and math? I'm guessing you are not actually familiar with a Catholic school education.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have slowly come to the conclusion that we cannot in good conscience send our kids to public for middle school. We are in Arlington and standards, especially behavioral standards have deteriorated. Disciplinary problems are rampant. Kids take pictures of other kids while using the bathroom and admin does nothing about it. Drug deals happen in school and students come to class high. I’m looking for a school that focuses strictly on academics and discipline. Unfortunately we cannot afford the expensive private secular schools for our three kids and someone suggested looking at catholic schools. The problem? We aren’t even Christian. We are Muslims of Arab origin. While we am more on the liberal side (don’t cover my hair etc) we still are practicing. Would my kids even be able to get into catholic school and if they can would they be welcome? We share a lot of things with Christians when it comes to faith but obviously do not believe that Jesus is the son of God. How much are particular religious beliefs emphasized in school? No issue with that of course but it might not be the right fit and my kids would stick out. Alternatively are there secular private schools that emphasize traditional methods of instruction and are also welcoming to minorities? Thank you so much.

Secular is better for minorities

And unless you believe in their doctrine and lack of science and math not sure this is righ5 place

Complete nonsense to make that generalization.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have slowly come to the conclusion that we cannot in good conscience send our kids to public for middle school. We are in Arlington and standards, especially behavioral standards have deteriorated. Disciplinary problems are rampant. Kids take pictures of other kids while using the bathroom and admin does nothing about it. Drug deals happen in school and students come to class high. I’m looking for a school that focuses strictly on academics and discipline. Unfortunately we cannot afford the expensive private secular schools for our three kids and someone suggested looking at catholic schools. The problem? We aren’t even Christian. We are Muslims of Arab origin. While we am more on the liberal side (don’t cover my hair etc) we still are practicing. Would my kids even be able to get into catholic school and if they can would they be welcome? We share a lot of things with Christians when it comes to faith but obviously do not believe that Jesus is the son of God. How much are particular religious beliefs emphasized in school? No issue with that of course but it might not be the right fit and my kids would stick out. Alternatively are there secular private schools that emphasize traditional methods of instruction and are also welcoming to minorities? Thank you so much.

Secular is better for minorities

And unless you believe in their doctrine and lack of science and math not sure this is righ5 place

Lack of science and math? I'm guessing you are not actually familiar with a Catholic school education.

Bigot

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have slowly come to the conclusion that we cannot in good conscience send our kids to public for middle school. We are in Arlington and standards, especially behavioral standards have deteriorated. Disciplinary problems are rampant. Kids take pictures of other kids while using the bathroom and admin does nothing about it. Drug deals happen in school and students come to class high. I’m looking for a school that focuses strictly on academics and discipline. Unfortunately we cannot afford the expensive private secular schools for our three kids and someone suggested looking at catholic schools. The problem? We aren’t even Christian. We are Muslims of Arab origin. While we am more on the liberal side (don’t cover my hair etc) we still are practicing. Would my kids even be able to get into catholic school and if they can would they be welcome? We share a lot of things with Christians when it comes to faith but obviously do not believe that Jesus is the son of God. How much are particular religious beliefs emphasized in school? No issue with that of course but it might not be the right fit and my kids would stick out. Alternatively are there secular private schools that emphasize traditional methods of instruction and are also welcoming to minorities? Thank you so much.

I was raised in a liberal non religious family but attended a Catholic high school, ended up converting, and now have children attending Arlington Diocese schools.

Based on my own personal experiences I’m a huge fan of Catholic education but would also advise that you absolutely should not enroll your children in the Catholic school system unless you are generally comfortable with them being immersed in Catholic teachings, including that Jesus is the son of God, (especially since the Arlington diocese is known for being among the most conservative in the country) and the possibility of your children ultimately converting to the Catholic faith.

It’s easy to claim that your children are wedded to your familial beliefs and won’t be swayed (my parents certainly believed this) but it’s a pretty naive point of view and hypocritical to send your children to a school whose fundamental teachings you’d be uncomfortable with them adopting for financial reasons or the perceived caliber of education.

Catholic schools are open to people of all races and denominations, but you should go into it clear eyed in the understanding that the ultimate goal (and reason why it is so relatively cheap) is to propagate the Catholic faith, not just to provide an affordable option to families seeking an alternative to public schools.
.

[Anonymous]

Catholic schools will be fine. Don’t fall for the anti catholic bias. Catholics are not evangelical and don’t seek to convert people. They will respect your family. Yes they will be exposed to religion but that is the pillar of western society and does not hurt to know about from a cultural, historical or literary point of view it can provide rich context.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Catholic schools will be fine. Don’t fall for the anti catholic bias. Catholics are not evangelical and don’t seek to convert people. They will respect your family. Yes they will be exposed to religion but that is the pillar of western society and does not hurt to know about from a cultural, historical or literary point of view it can provide rich context.

I guess it depends on what you mean by “doing fine”.

I don’t think a young person can go through a high school experience surrounded by a peer that is composed of 90% people of one religion and one sub-culture and not be affected by it. It won’t necessarily be bad for them. But it will change them and in ways the family might not consider when they are attracted by that comparatively low tuition.

Being part of a very small minority in a sea of people who are uniformly different is difficult situation for some.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Catholic schools will be fine. Don’t fall for the anti catholic bias. Catholics are not evangelical and don’t seek to convert people. They will respect your family. Yes they will be exposed to religion but that is the pillar of western society and does not hurt to know about from a cultural, historical or literary point of view it can provide rich context.

I guess it depends on what you mean by “doing fine”.

I don’t think a young person can go through a high school experience surrounded by a peer that is composed of 90% people of one religion and one sub-culture and not be affected by it. It won’t necessarily be bad for them. But it will change them and in ways the family might not consider when they are attracted by that comparatively low tuition.

Being part of a very small minority in a sea of people who are uniformly different is difficult situation for some.

I don't think any of the Catholic high schools are 90% Catholic. And there is not the kind of uniformity or singular subculture among Catholics that you seem to expect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Catholic schools will be fine. Don’t fall for the anti catholic bias. Catholics are not evangelical and don’t seek to convert people. They will respect your family. Yes they will be exposed to religion but that is the pillar of western society and does not hurt to know about from a cultural, historical or literary point of view it can provide rich context.

Please read 17:48. The goal of faith based religion is to propagate the faith. A Catholic education propagates the Catholic faith.