Is it rude to not order an alcoholic drink if you’re sat at the bar?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you English OP? were/are "sat" at the bar is a very English way of stating things (and one that their grammarians frown at as well, but that's another thread).

Best advice in America- the bartender probably did not care at all about the tip. At all. they were probably more annoyed about providing food service at a busy bar and the iced tea is all the way over in a pitcher near the waitress station or something.

? DP, southern American and I would say “was sat at the bar”.

I don’t think this is a British way of speaking. I would say “I was sat at the bar”’ if the hostess sat me there. I would say “I sat at the bar” if I selected that seat. Born and raised here in the USA.

Please stop. It's "I was sitting"

Please learn English.

The hostess sat OP at the bar. OP was sat at the bar by the hostess. OP was not sitting at the bar by the hostess.

[Anonymous]

No. I was a bartender, including in very high end establishments, and I would never make any guest feel less-than or self-conscious for not drinking alcohol.

You received poor service. I’m sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you English OP? were/are "sat" at the bar is a very English way of stating things (and one that their grammarians frown at as well, but that's another thread).

Best advice in America- the bartender probably did not care at all about the tip. At all. they were probably more annoyed about providing food service at a busy bar and the iced tea is all the way over in a pitcher near the waitress station or something.

When someone else chooses where you sit, how else do you phrase it other than that they "sat" you there?

I'm pretty darn American and wouldn't know another way to say this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you English OP? were/are "sat" at the bar is a very English way of stating things (and one that their grammarians frown at as well, but that's another thread).

Best advice in America- the bartender probably did not care at all about the tip. At all. they were probably more annoyed about providing food service at a busy bar and the iced tea is all the way over in a pitcher near the waitress station or something.

? DP, southern American and I would say “was sat at the bar”.

I don’t think this is a British way of speaking. I would say “I was sat at the bar”’ if the hostess sat me there. I would say “I sat at the bar” if I selected that seat. Born and raised here in the USA.

Please stop. It's "I was sitting"

The relevant thing here is that someone else made the choice for OP.

If you go into a restaurant, and they say "choose your seat" and you sit at the bar, then the etiquette is different. But in this case, OP would have been sitting at a table, except the host(ess) SAT them at the bar. They were SAT there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you English OP? were/are "sat" at the bar is a very English way of stating things (and one that their grammarians frown at as well, but that's another thread).

Best advice in America- the bartender probably did not care at all about the tip. At all. they were probably more annoyed about providing food service at a busy bar and the iced tea is all the way over in a pitcher near the waitress station or something.

When someone else chooses where you sit, how else do you phrase it other than that they "sat" you there?

I'm pretty darn American and wouldn't know another way to say this.

NP. I would say I was seated at the bar. When I read the thread title I definitely thought OP was British!

[Anonymous]

Responding to OP, you never have an obligation to anyone to purchase or consume alcohol. If you think you ought to help out the bartender leave a generous cash tip for your Coke.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Not everyone can drink alcohol, OP, surely you and the bartender realize this. Some people (especially in Asian populations) can't tolerate it. Some take meds that don't go with alcohol. Some are recovering alcoholics. Some people are pregnant. Some people have a religious objection. Finally, some just don't like the taste.

If he made a face, that's his problem, not yours.

Add, some people are limiting themselves to x per week. They have other plans that don’t include alcohol. They have an impotent test tomorrow. They are driving everybody home.

I hope the waiter didn’t actually pull a face. But if he did, I’m glad (/s) he thinks people should drink irresponsibly so he can make $2 extra.

[Anonymous]

DH and I are teetotalers. We get responses like this sometime.

Especially because we are both ordering soda or water. They’re not making as much in tips I guess. I do not feel guilty at all. It’s my life, and I tip generously.

If it’s a nicer place, a celebratory dinner, one or both of us will get a mocktail or a sparkling water (I’m cutting sugar after becoming obese after pregnancy, so sometimes I go for a sugary celebratory drink, but not always).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH and I are teetotalers. We get responses like this sometime.

Especially because we are both ordering soda or water. They’re not making as much in tips I guess. I do not feel guilty at all. It’s my life, and I tip generously.

If it’s a nicer place, a celebratory dinner, one or both of us will get a mocktail or a sparkling water (I’m cutting sugar after becoming obese after pregnancy, so sometimes I go for a sugary celebratory drink, but not always).

I should add, it’s rare we have to be seated at the bar. If we chose it, it would be one thing. If the host seated us there, sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Not everyone can drink alcohol, OP, surely you and the bartender realize this. Some people (especially in Asian populations) can't tolerate it. Some take meds that don't go with alcohol. Some are recovering alcoholics. Some people are pregnant. Some people have a religious objection. Finally, some just don't like the taste.

If he made a face, that's his problem, not yours.

Add, some people are limiting themselves to x per week. They have other plans that don’t include alcohol. They have an impotent test tomorrow. They are driving everybody home.

I hope the waiter didn’t actually pull a face. But if he did, I’m glad (/s) he thinks people should drink irresponsibly so he can make $2 extra.

"They have an impotent test tomorrow".

Serious LOLed!

[Anonymous]

Are you British?

[Anonymous]

I guess it would be kinda rude to order a virgin pina colada when it’s busy because it’s a pain to use the blender. That’s what my ex-boyfriend told me, so I wasn’t allowed to get them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you English OP? were/are "sat" at the bar is a very English way of stating things (and one that their grammarians frown at as well, but that's another thread).

Best advice in America- the bartender probably did not care at all about the tip. At all. they were probably more annoyed about providing food service at a busy bar and the iced tea is all the way over in a pitcher near the waitress station or something.

That's how I would "state" it, and I grew up in Texas and Michigan, and have lived my adult life on the East Coast...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess it would be kinda rude to order a virgin pina colada when it’s busy because it’s a pain to use the blender. That’s what my ex-boyfriend told me, so I wasn’t allowed to get them.

Allowed?!
Be grateful he's your ex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you English OP? were/are "sat" at the bar is a very English way of stating things (and one that their grammarians frown at as well, but that's another thread).

Best advice in America- the bartender probably did not care at all about the tip. At all. they were probably more annoyed about providing food service at a busy bar and the iced tea is all the way over in a pitcher near the waitress station or something.

? DP, southern American and I would say “was sat at the bar”.

Also Southern: I was sitting at the bar or I was seated at the bar. I don’t drink alcohol. Sometimes I order iced tea, sometimes I order non-alcoholic mixed drinks — and tip a bit higher.