Is it rude to not order an alcoholic drink if you’re sat at the bar?

[Anonymous]

The bartender is worried about their livelihood. It sounds like a crazy night and there were probably drink orders coming in from tables as well as the bar itself. It wasn’t nice that they made a face at you, but if you can chalk it up to their stress, be a kind customer, and get on with doing your own thing, consider it a kindness put out into the universe.

[Anonymous]

No, you don't have to order alcohol if you sit at the bar. It's perfectly fine to order food and sit there and have an iced tea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you English OP? were/are "sat" at the bar is a very English way of stating things (and one that their grammarians frown at as well, but that's another thread).

Best advice in America- the bartender probably did not care at all about the tip. At all. they were probably more annoyed about providing food service at a busy bar and the iced tea is all the way over in a pitcher near the waitress station or something.

? DP, southern American and I would say “was sat at the bar”.

Interesting. NP here and every time I hear that construction I think of this:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The bartender is worried about their livelihood. It sounds like a crazy night and there were probably drink orders coming in from tables as well as the bar itself. It wasn’t nice that they made a face at you, but if you can chalk it up to their stress, be a kind customer, and get on with doing your own thing, consider it a kindness put out into the universe.

It wasn’t the bartender who gave attitude, it was a waiter, who would have had the same order from OPs party no matter where they had been seated.

But I don’t drink and most of the time I only order water because I’m not paying $4 for an iced tea. Sometimes I’ll order club soda with lime at a bar but usually they don’t charge for that because they figure I’m driving the rest of the party home (and that’s usually the case).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you English OP? were/are "sat" at the bar is a very English way of stating things (and one that their grammarians frown at as well, but that's another thread).

Best advice in America- the bartender probably did not care at all about the tip. At all. they were probably more annoyed about providing food service at a busy bar and the iced tea is all the way over in a pitcher near the waitress station or something.

? DP, southern American and I would say “was sat at the bar”.

I don’t think this is a British way of speaking. I would say “I was sat at the bar”’ if the hostess sat me there. I would say “I sat at the bar” if I selected that seat. Born and raised here in the USA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you English OP? were/are "sat" at the bar is a very English way of stating things (and one that their grammarians frown at as well, but that's another thread).

Best advice in America- the bartender probably did not care at all about the tip. At all. they were probably more annoyed about providing food service at a busy bar and the iced tea is all the way over in a pitcher near the waitress station or something.

? DP, southern American and I would say “was sat at the bar”.

I don’t think this is a British way of speaking. I would say “I was sat at the bar”’ if the hostess sat me there. I would say “I sat at the bar” if I selected that seat. Born and raised here in the USA.

I would say I was seated at the bar. The little sign says "Please wait here to be seated" or "Seat yourself"

[Anonymous]

My husband owns bars and there is absolutely no requirement to order alcohol to sit at the bar. There are a million reasons someone might not be drinking - pregnancy, driver, medical reasons, addiction reasons, simply not feeling like it and it’s not the bartender’s (or waiter in this case, which is a weird arrangement) business to inquire or care. So they probably lost a few dollars in tips because of “what” the individual drank (and should actually lose more given their attitude). They should not care, especially if the place was busy enough to need to sit you at the bar. They’re making good money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you English OP? were/are "sat" at the bar is a very English way of stating things (and one that their grammarians frown at as well, but that's another thread).

Best advice in America- the bartender probably did not care at all about the tip. At all. they were probably more annoyed about providing food service at a busy bar and the iced tea is all the way over in a pitcher near the waitress station or something.

? DP, southern American and I would say “was sat at the bar”.

I don’t think this is a British way of speaking. I would say “I was sat at the bar”’ if the hostess sat me there. I would say “I sat at the bar” if I selected that seat. Born and raised here in the USA.

Please stop. It's "I was sitting"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you English OP? were/are "sat" at the bar is a very English way of stating things (and one that their grammarians frown at as well, but that's another thread).

Best advice in America- the bartender probably did not care at all about the tip. At all. they were probably more annoyed about providing food service at a busy bar and the iced tea is all the way over in a pitcher near the waitress station or something.

? DP, southern American and I would say “was sat at the bar”.

Interesting. NP here and every time I hear that construction I think of this:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have tipped less after that face

+100

[Anonymous]

It’s weird and unprofessional for a waiter to “make a face”, ever, because you ordered iced tea. It was on the menu, right? Maybe he suddenly realized he left his oven on at home, or something. Maybe iced tea murdered his mom.

I’ve found that bartenders are usually really cool about non-alcoholic orders. They’ve seen all the reasons that people order them in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have tipped less after that face

+1

Grown mentally apt adults should not be making faces, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You weren't imagining the pressure. A cocktail or glass of wine/beer is kind of like the rent you are expected to pay to sit at the bar. I have, in the past, ordered drinks I didn't want (I rarely drink alcohol) due to this pressure. I now order a bottle of sparkling water as my "rent."

F your "rent"

[Anonymous]

I think you are creating a scenario in your head that may not be what happened. He made a face and you assume it’s because you did not order an alcoholic drink and instead ordered ice tea? That’s a stretch… maybe he had an itch in his nose. Maybe he hates ice tea. Maybe you aren’t attractive. Maybe he was tired from a packed restaurant and have to work late because of it. Assume the best and relax.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn’t have ordered a drink with alcohol because I don’t drink. I’ve done that plenty of times and no one has ever made a face. Either way, it’s fine.