Full-circle moment: here’s mine and would love to hear yours

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also like these stories. And formerly-poor PP, that’s an amazing example of how your own inner qualities and the real kindness of someone else can work wonders. Have you been in touch with the gym teacher since going to college? How is your life now? I’m happy for you.

Nope. I barely ever talked to that gym teacher when I was at school. My life is great now.

You should thank that teacher in an email! It would mean so much to her.

[Anonymous]

Wow. So many trolls dumping in Op.

That's an awesome karma story! I liked it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I spent over a decade working at a law firm and being treated terribly by a group of bullies (partners and some associates who were 2-3 years senior to me). Without going into an incredible amount of detail about how they treated me, let’s just say that they pretty openly mocked me and I cried regularly and only stayed as long as I did because I kept having kids and needed the maternity leave benefits and then didn’t want to jump ship right after maternity leave. I also did search for other jobs and didn’t get offers, and I recall being really upset about a couple of jobs I had hoped to get which were huge pay cuts but I thought would be a good fit in my interest area.

One person who I had worked with at the firm
who was in a different office ended up recruiting me to come with him in-house. This person saw how mistreated I was by the firm bullies and defended me and ended his client relationship with the main partner who bullied me. The partner who bullied me lost his shit and basically ruined his reputation by disparaging me so badly that he looked delusional while I sat calmly on the sidelines, saying nothing.

Full circle moment is still happening as my former bullies wish they had me as a client, my salary more than doubled by going in house, I’m treated with respect and value at my new company, I actually work fewer hours than I did at the firm and have more time at home, and I’ve funneled all my outside counsel work to the few people who treated me well while I was at the firm.

Fantastic! Full circle for sure. I’m surprised you’re giving work to the previous firm, despite the few decent colleagues. Says a lot about you. Pretty sweet that the bullies eat crow daily while the non bullies benefit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was poor and came from unemployed drug addicts. I was the kid who only had three outfits and never showered - you have probably seen the type. I was bullied mercilessly growing up. Everything from getting beat up each morning on the school bus to having tacks and brown clay put on my seat to having my homework stolen and destroyed, to having people refuse to be in a group with me for any class project, to getting tripped going down the stairs, to getting my face shoved in trash cans, everything.

But I was smart and had a nice side and my HS gym teacher of all people, took a shine to me, and insisted on other teachers helping me. She barely talked to me, but worked a lot behind the scenes, and I went away to college on a full scholarship. I was the poorest one there, but now nobody bullied me. I had access to safe bathrooms and showered every morning and ate every single day.

Ten years after graduating I was sitting in on interviews and one of my worst bullies came in. That'll be a big fat NOPE from me.

Please tell us more about this interview! Did the person recognize you?

[Anonymous]

Karma is real.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow. So many trolls dumping in Op.

That's an awesome karma story! I liked it.

Why are we trolls just because our perspectives differ?

[Anonymous]

one of the previous poster's story reminded me of someone I know who had a horribly abusive and neglected childhood--mother/drug addict took off, "raised" by abusive alcoholic father, homeless/lived in sros, etc. but an incredibly brilliant kid. managed to get by in high school working 2 jobs, crashing with friends/their families in junior/senior year simply for housing, had support from a few teachers, eventually got full ride to college and then grad school, founded a tech company in the early 90s, sold for a couple hundred million to microsoft. That being said, there was a lot of damage and not sure he's really "happy" (he never got married/had kids, has had periods of deep depression).

my story is much more boring and insular but there was someone in grad school in our small program who ended up sort of a nemesis (and I have never had one before or since....the entire concept is kind of foreign to me). she crashed with me for a while between apartments and proceeded to sleep with my boyfriend when i was out of town (he sucked too, of course, they are a pair of sociopaths) and they carried on secretly for a while (neither of them told me) and then she tried to undermine me with our (shared) thesis advisor--didn't help that she was the 'star' grad student and I had horrible imposter syndrome. I broke up with the dickwad, but was so deeply depressed during this time and directionless and she was this brilliant, beautiful hot shot who everyone thought would go on to greatness whereas I was a loser who had wasted years in a pointless phd program. two years later, I get a one year fellowship at an institute where she had done the same fellowship the year before but I assume she would have left. turns out she stayed on there (later found out because she was having an affair with her married supervisor) ...ugh, it was so awful since we had to interact a lot. She eventually left and got a teaching job....and then flamed out. never published, thus didn't get tenure, and from what i hear has been more or less unemployed (and I think single?) for the past decade, whereas I've done respectably well in both professional and personal life. I sometimes wonder what was wrong with her internally to be like that, there must have been something missing inside, since she seemed to have it all on the outside. I am not even mad or angry, just kind of sad that I allowed myself to be depressed and affected by it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hear you, OP.

But I'm careful with the karma thing. The wheel of fortune keeps turning and doesn't stop just because you've reached a relative high, you know? You can always go right back down. Two of my close friends have had cancers in the last couple of years. Middle-aged, kids in school, jobs, etc... It's been brutal.

So I'm just grateful for whatever I have, and don't look askance at anyone else. We're all going to die at some point anyway, why not be nice to each other.

You really think people who get cancer get it due to karma?? Wtf is wrong with you?

[Anonymous]

I don't really believe in karma. I've seen bullies from the past over the years on FB and some have predictably messed up lives, while others seem to have turned their lives around and become better people. I also know wonderful people who have tragically died too early due to cancer, accidents, etc. I believe people can change we just need to take one day at a time and try to improve ourselves each day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Four years ago was probably the lowest point of my life: I was getting divorced (and it was contentious), was midway through a demanding graduate program, despite working two jobs was flat broke, and generally felt intense pressure all around, with no relief in sight.

One of my jobs was working in a coffee shop, where my coworkers were all at least a decade younger than I was. I felt like a loser and an outsider and wasn’t treated very nicely, in particular by one barista we’ll call Christy. I believe she got me fired from that job, which I really needed.

Well, in the years since, I have completed my graduate program, started a great new career, gotten remarried, bought a house, and had a baby (I am currently on maternity leave). This morning I was walking with my baby and decided to pop in to a new coffee shop in my neighborhood. Guess who’s still pouring coffee? Christy.

What are your full-circle moments?

I feel like you’ve only come half circle. You’ve still got some inner work to do. Forgiveness, grace, understanding, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow. So many trolls dumping in Op.

That's an awesome karma story! I liked it.

It isn't really Karma though. By OPs math, Christy is still 6 years younger than OP was when she worked there. She has no clue what Christy's life looks like now. In 6 years when she's the age of OP when she worked there, then OP can talk about Karma and all that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hear you, OP.

But I'm careful with the karma thing. The wheel of fortune keeps turning and doesn't stop just because you've reached a relative high, you know? You can always go right back down. Two of my close friends have had cancers in the last couple of years. Middle-aged, kids in school, jobs, etc... It's been brutal.

So I'm just grateful for whatever I have, and don't look askance at anyone else. We're all going to die at some point anyway, why not be nice to each other.

You really think people who get cancer get it due to karma?? Wtf is wrong with you?

DP. You have reading comprehension issues. The PP is saying she doesn't believe in karma b/c life deals such random hands.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't really believe in karma. I've seen bullies from the past over the years on FB and some have predictably messed up lives, while others seem to have turned their lives around and become better people. I also know wonderful people who have tragically died too early due to cancer, accidents, etc. I believe people can change we just need to take one day at a time and try to improve ourselves each day.

Remember that Hindus believe in reincarnation until you reach a state of consciousness such that you can abandon all dharmas and take refuge in god alone. Until then, you are born again, and your bad karma in this life could be due to something you did in a past life. It's the only faith that has an explanation for why bad things happen to good people.

[Anonymous]

So many bozos.

[Anonymous]

This is not a "full circle" story, OP.

A full circle would be that you became rich and successful, bought out the coffee shop, and gave other struggling, divorced young women a job, mentored them, and watched them grow and become successes, too.

Your story is just spite and ego.