Annoyingness on Buy Nothing Groups

[Anonymous]

The thing that made me finally leave the group is them allowing animals to be given away freely in the group. All the other things I listed were additional things that upset me, but none were as bad as the animal issue. That, to me, is really where I draw the line for all the reasons I already mentioned.

PP, when I gave away that kid stuff I was new to the group. I didn't buy anything but it was all brand new stuff. I'm a speech pathologist so I could have used it for kids on my caseload but I gave it away trying to do something nice just because. I don't regret it, but one of the moms who picked it up is the greedy type always asking for stuff. I dont' really care at this point, but it is a reminder every time she would post asking for something (expensive) which was like every week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly you are putting way too much mental energy into this. Stop following it on facebook and getting updates. Just post stuff for free when you want to let it go and be glad it's not going in a landfill.

I have had the bad interactions with humane societies and will never use one again. I will be going straight to a breeder instead. I have kids and was told that they wouldn't consider someone who had a kid under 5. Another told me I'd need a fenced in yard. Another told me that they wanted a remote worker or a SAHM (I wfh 3 days a week, but that wasn't enough). My beloved dog who just passed away last year was given to me for free. At the time (graduated college and paychecks hadn't started yet) I wouldn't have been able to afford the high humane society fees. I think a group matching dogs with owners who want them for free is not a bad idea.

Yep. The first FOUR I contacted told me they wouldn’t give me a dog while I had a child under ten in the house. Many also insisted on a fence (that’s only $15k, no biggie) or a SAHP (sure, I will ditch my career for a dog. That’s healthy). WTF?!?

OP again. Again, they are not ALL like this. Try a rescue group/smaller humane society. Don't discount them all because of that experience. I agree that is over the top. My mom is a great dog owner and she was turned down once because she doesn't have a fence. The thing they don't realize is she lives on like 20 acres where they get to go on long walks and her dogs are treated better than most people.

OP, you are entirely missing the point and most are like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do hate the entitlement of a lot of the members. Recently in my BN two different people posted requests for a free Tripp Trapp. Not just a high chair, but the fanciest status $200+ high chair. Come on. It's gross.

LOL because I gifted the baby seat part of my Tripp Trapp and later gifted the chair part on BN.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm annoyed at the people who use BN for resale. There is one person who is always asking for furniture and I don't know what they do with it, but I suspect they resell it.

There's a couple in my group who always responds "Interested!" to anything of value including tons of furniture. One of them is a doctor and they live in cushy home. They give away low value items. I got a book from them once which is how I know about their home. Anywho... I was browsing Facebook Marketplace one day and there were tons of listings of items they got in the BN group.

I'm the PP. If I were to be generous in my suspicions I might think they were like a charity middle man. Our group specifically discourages this unless they are upfront about it. Our admins would encourage the people with needs to join their local BNG.

However, I think they are reselling them and I should browse FB market place just to be nosy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound annoying and exhausting. I have no issue with people posting wishes for things like a headboard.

I think most adoption rescue folks are irritating. Charging a fee is really gross especially when some are charging as much as breeders do. And, the rules are crazy. Plus, it's very hard to get a dog that is small or gentle or hypoallergenic. Rehoming in a group like that isn't a great idea but its better then sending them to a shelter.

Wow, I'm sorry you feel that way. Most rescues are trying their best to find good homes for animals that have been through hell and back or have never had a home at all. The fees they charge are usually to 1) ensure the animal is placed in a good home 2) Usually those animals have all their vaccines and have been spayed or neutered. Rescues run on very little most of the time, especially the small ones. I wish before judging you'd try to understand the reasoning behind why it isn't a good idea to rehome animals in a group like that.

I have no issue with people asking for things. It's the type of things they're asking for and the way it is asked... also the frequency. I should have mentioned that. The lady who does that is always asking for something new like every week and it's oddly specific/ Maybe you're the type who does this and that's why you're being so nasty about it.

[Anonymous]

I'm not missing the point. I even tried to relate. So no, I'm not missing the point.
I deal with members of the public who decide they don't want an animal anymore because they are bored with it. Or they forget to get their dog/cat spayed or neutered and now they need help finding a home for their litter of kittens and if we don't do it soon, they will take them to the kill shelter by Tuesday. A lot of members of the public forget that people who do this are volunteering and we see and deal with a lot of upsetting things when it comes to how animals are treated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm annoyed at the people who use BN for resale. There is one person who is always asking for furniture and I don't know what they do with it, but I suspect they resell it.

There's a couple in my group who always responds "Interested!" to anything of value including tons of furniture. One of them is a doctor and they live in cushy home. They give away low value items. I got a book from them once which is how I know about their home. Anywho... I was browsing Facebook Marketplace one day and there were tons of listings of items they got in the BN group.

I'm the PP. If I were to be generous in my suspicions I might think they were like a charity middle man. Our group specifically discourages this unless they are upfront about it. Our admins would encourage the people with needs to join their local BNG.

However, I think they are reselling them and I should browse FB market place just to be nosy.

The couple I was talking about is definitely reselling them on fb marketplace because I saw the items and clicked on the seller and it was that couple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I do hate the entitlement of a lot of the members. Recently in my BN two different people posted requests for a free Tripp Trapp. Not just a high chair, but the fanciest status $200+ high chair. Come on. It's gross.

LOL because I gifted the baby seat part of my Tripp Trapp and later gifted the chair part on BN.

That's really nice of you but it's still an obnoxious thing to post a wish for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound annoying and exhausting. I have no issue with people posting wishes for things like a headboard.

I think most adoption rescue folks are irritating. Charging a fee is really gross especially when some are charging as much as breeders do. And, the rules are crazy. Plus, it's very hard to get a dog that is small or gentle or hypoallergenic. Rehoming in a group like that isn't a great idea but its better then sending them to a shelter.

Wow, I'm sorry you feel that way. Most rescues are trying their best to find good homes for animals that have been through hell and back or have never had a home at all. The fees they charge are usually to 1) ensure the animal is placed in a good home 2) Usually those animals have all their vaccines and have been spayed or neutered. Rescues run on very little most of the time, especially the small ones. I wish before judging you'd try to understand the reasoning behind why it isn't a good idea to rehome animals in a group like that.

I have no issue with people asking for things. It's the type of things they're asking for and the way it is asked... also the frequency. I should have mentioned that. The lady who does that is always asking for something new like every week and it's oddly specific/ Maybe you're the type who does this and that's why you're being so nasty about it.

I’m a different poster, but just because people ask doesn’t mean they receive. I really want an entryway bench with cubbies and I express interest in every single one posted in my super active 2500 person group. Some where someone probably thinks I’m hoarding benches, but I’ve yet to get one. Thanks to Facebook, if you go look at posts when a person’s name pops up or if the person commenting is your FB fried, their comments and posts they interact with will be more frequently featured in your feed. It becomes a cycle with the algorithm. I know this because my mom had some petty beef with a lady in her FB group and the more she clicked on posts this lady commented on, the more this lady’s comments showed up, thus feeding her sense of injustice.

There are people in my group as well who ask for specific things all the time. People that are annoyed by them just don’t gift to them. People who want stuff out of their house don’t care who takes it or why. Over time, even in groups as large as mine, I have seen some people’s Wish posts get less and less interaction. Over time they move on to a new grift.

My main annoyance is people who post a wish for something someone just posted as a gift in the past few days. Sometimes I wonder if it’s unconscious. They don’t remember seeing the gift post and then a day later they think “I wish I had X”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound annoying and exhausting. I have no issue with people posting wishes for things like a headboard.

I think most adoption rescue folks are irritating. Charging a fee is really gross especially when some are charging as much as breeders do. And, the rules are crazy. Plus, it's very hard to get a dog that is small or gentle or hypoallergenic. Rehoming in a group like that isn't a great idea but its better then sending them to a shelter.

Charging a fee is “gross”? Entitled much?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound annoying and exhausting. I have no issue with people posting wishes for things like a headboard.

I think most adoption rescue folks are irritating. Charging a fee is really gross especially when some are charging as much as breeders do. And, the rules are crazy. Plus, it's very hard to get a dog that is small or gentle or hypoallergenic. Rehoming in a group like that isn't a great idea but its better then sending them to a shelter.

Charging a fee is “gross”? Entitled much?

Couldn't agree more. Charging a fee is more than reasonable. Animals are not free. It's widely known that giving away animals for free puts them at risk of ending up in a bad situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound annoying and exhausting. I have no issue with people posting wishes for things like a headboard.

I think most adoption rescue folks are irritating. Charging a fee is really gross especially when some are charging as much as breeders do. And, the rules are crazy. Plus, it's very hard to get a dog that is small or gentle or hypoallergenic. Rehoming in a group like that isn't a great idea but its better then sending them to a shelter.

Charging a fee is “gross”? Entitled much?

It's really hard to get a dog that is small or gentle or hypoallergenic?
You sound like literally nuts. You want all of that for free. Most "hypoallergenic" dogs are specific breed types. There are tons of dogs that "small" and "gentle" available for adoption. If a dog isn't gentle, it might have been in an abusive home where it was (spoiler alert) obtained for free by people who made shitty dog owners.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound annoying and exhausting. I have no issue with people posting wishes for things like a headboard.

I think most adoption rescue folks are irritating. Charging a fee is really gross especially when some are charging as much as breeders do. And, the rules are crazy. Plus, it's very hard to get a dog that is small or gentle or hypoallergenic. Rehoming in a group like that isn't a great idea but its better then sending them to a shelter.

Wow, I'm sorry you feel that way. Most rescues are trying their best to find good homes for animals that have been through hell and back or have never had a home at all. The fees they charge are usually to 1) ensure the animal is placed in a good home 2) Usually those animals have all their vaccines and have been spayed or neutered. Rescues run on very little most of the time, especially the small ones. I wish before judging you'd try to understand the reasoning behind why it isn't a good idea to rehome animals in a group like that.

I have no issue with people asking for things. It's the type of things they're asking for and the way it is asked... also the frequency. I should have mentioned that. The lady who does that is always asking for something new like every week and it's oddly specific/ Maybe you're the type who does this and that's why you're being so nasty about it.

I’m a different poster, but just because people ask doesn’t mean they receive. I really want an entryway bench with cubbies and I express interest in every single one posted in my super active 2500 person group. Some where someone probably thinks I’m hoarding benches, but I’ve yet to get one. Thanks to Facebook, if you go look at posts when a person’s name pops up or if the person commenting is your FB fried, their comments and posts they interact with will be more frequently featured in your feed. It becomes a cycle with the algorithm. I know this because my mom had some petty beef with a lady in her FB group and the more she clicked on posts this lady commented on, the more this lady’s comments showed up, thus feeding her sense of injustice.

There are people in my group as well who ask for specific things all the time. People that are annoyed by them just don’t gift to them. People who want stuff out of their house don’t care who takes it or why. Over time, even in groups as large as mine, I have seen some people’s Wish posts get less and less interaction. Over time they move on to a new grift.

My main annoyance is people who post a wish for something someone just posted as a gift in the past few days. Sometimes I wonder if it’s unconscious. They don’t remember seeing the gift post and then a day later they think “I wish I had X”.

NP, and I don't generally post wish posts, but my group is so active that FB doesn't alway show everything in my front-pge feed. Sometimes if I click directly into the group I see all kinds of stuff that I never saw get posted in the the first place (and things get pushed down the page quickly due to the volume). So they may not have seen the gift post (though I'm intruiged by your subconscious angle too!).

Re: reselling, my group caught somebody reselling stuff and she got booted out and then there were lots of stern reminders from our admins and it was pretty obvious who they were talking about since she was no longer around and had previously been interested in everything.

I'm a little disturbed by the people who appear to be hoarders and are interested in everything of every genre, including opened/perishable food items...

Despite its quirks, I love my BN group. It is one of the genuinely good places on my social media. Funny too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound annoying and exhausting. I have no issue with people posting wishes for things like a headboard.

I think most adoption rescue folks are irritating. Charging a fee is really gross especially when some are charging as much as breeders do. And, the rules are crazy. Plus, it's very hard to get a dog that is small or gentle or hypoallergenic. Rehoming in a group like that isn't a great idea but its better then sending them to a shelter.

Wow, I'm sorry you feel that way. Most rescues are trying their best to find good homes for animals that have been through hell and back or have never had a home at all. The fees they charge are usually to 1) ensure the animal is placed in a good home 2) Usually those animals have all their vaccines and have been spayed or neutered. Rescues run on very little most of the time, especially the small ones. I wish before judging you'd try to understand the reasoning behind why it isn't a good idea to rehome animals in a group like that.

I have no issue with people asking for things. It's the type of things they're asking for and the way it is asked... also the frequency. I should have mentioned that. The lady who does that is always asking for something new like every week and it's oddly specific/ Maybe you're the type who does this and that's why you're being so nasty about it.

I’m a different poster, but just because people ask doesn’t mean they receive. I really want an entryway bench with cubbies and I express interest in every single one posted in my super active 2500 person group. Some where someone probably thinks I’m hoarding benches, but I’ve yet to get one. Thanks to Facebook, if you go look at posts when a person’s name pops up or if the person commenting is your FB fried, their comments and posts they interact with will be more frequently featured in your feed. It becomes a cycle with the algorithm. I know this because my mom had some petty beef with a lady in her FB group and the more she clicked on posts this lady commented on, the more this lady’s comments showed up, thus feeding her sense of injustice.

There are people in my group as well who ask for specific things all the time. People that are annoyed by them just don’t gift to them. People who want stuff out of their house don’t care who takes it or why. Over time, even in groups as large as mine, I have seen some people’s Wish posts get less and less interaction. Over time they move on to a new grift.

My main annoyance is people who post a wish for something someone just posted as a gift in the past few days. Sometimes I wonder if it’s unconscious. They don’t remember seeing the gift post and then a day later they think “I wish I had X”.

I limit myself to 10 minutes on Facebook a day. There's no way I see everything people post on my BN and I have had way better luck both asking and responding to wishes rather than posting gifts tbh.

[Anonymous]

Ours isn't so bad, but it's funny to see what people have/keep. I recently saw a listing giving away a LOT of panty hose. Even back in the heyday of panty house, who has more than 3 or 4 pairs?