Middle schooler failing - no word from school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With no scores below 50% (eg no 0s for missing assignments), mandatory retakes for anything under a B, how is anyone failing?

Retakes are mandatory in that we have to allow them. But a bunch of kids won’t bother doing the retake. They do not care. I will give an assignment and they say “what will my grade be if I don’t do this?” I tell them I don’t play number games like that. Do it or don’t and then deal with what the result is. You cannot imagine the amount of support we have to give to some kids to even pick up a pencil and LOOK like they’re attempting something. The kids who are gonna do it will do it and do fine but the ones who are failing even with all the buffers and protections we have in the policy to prevent failing are TRULY doing absolutely nothing despite reminders, redirects, help from teacher, retakes, etc. It’s wild. I don’t call anymore. It has never once resulted in the kid changing their behaviors. It just becomes me having to explain what I have done to justify why the kid won’t write down two sentences for an exit ticket.

So basically OP has a child who is willfully failing? Not turning in assignments or retaking tests that do well.

Honestly, the school will only care if their performance drops in the SOLs. Then you would get notice from the school

I don’t know that it’s willfully failing as much as it’s a belief that no matter what they will still get passed along and not actually fail.

[Anonymous]

I am shocked at how many people are saying the onus is on the kids / parents. It is to an extent, but failing every class should be sending off alarm bells with everyone.

Good luck to you, OP. My DC went through WMS and is now at YHS, and I got no support from the school until DC was failing every class - a fact of which the attendees at the 504 meeting were unaware, even though it was the primary reason for the 504 - and had to be partially hospitalized for depression. And I raised the issue with teachers, counselors, admin, requested meetings, etc. ALL THROUGH MIDDLE SCHOOL, and WMS was USELESS.

Good luck to you, OP, and if you can leave APS, do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am shocked at how many people are saying the onus is on the kids / parents. It is to an extent, but failing every class should be sending off alarm bells with everyone.

Good luck to you, OP. My DC went through WMS and is now at YHS, and I got no support from the school until DC was failing every class - a fact of which the attendees at the 504 meeting were unaware, even though it was the primary reason for the 504 - and had to be partially hospitalized for depression. And I raised the issue with teachers, counselors, admin, requested meetings, etc. ALL THROUGH MIDDLE SCHOOL, and WMS was USELESS.

Good luck to you, OP, and if you can leave APS, do it.

Don’t leave APS. Dig deeper and get your kid help. (Directed at OP- not you.) It may not be depression or a disability but it’s something and if you don’t address it now it will get worse through high school. Bailing on APS and acting like it’s the district’s issue doesn’t help your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am shocked at how many people are saying the onus is on the kids / parents. It is to an extent, but failing every class should be sending off alarm bells with everyone.

Good luck to you, OP. My DC went through WMS and is now at YHS, and I got no support from the school until DC was failing every class - a fact of which the attendees at the 504 meeting were unaware, even though it was the primary reason for the 504 - and had to be partially hospitalized for depression. And I raised the issue with teachers, counselors, admin, requested meetings, etc. ALL THROUGH MIDDLE SCHOOL, and WMS was USELESS.

Good luck to you, OP, and if you can leave APS, do it.

Don’t leave APS. Dig deeper and get your kid help. (Directed at OP- not you.) It may not be depression or a disability but it’s something and if you don’t address it now it will get worse through high school. Bailing on APS and acting like it’s the district’s issue doesn’t help your kid.

I think OP is trying to get their kid help. But WMS is widely known to be a really hard place to get help. Leaving is not an unreasonable decision.

[Anonymous]

I am surprised the guidance counselor has not reached out. What is the point of guidance counselors if they don't reach out to parents in a situation like this? There could be something serious going on at home (parent in hospice etc) that could lead to a student failing classes and the parents not noticing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised the guidance counselor has not reached out. What is the point of guidance counselors if they don't reach out to parents in a situation like this? There could be something serious going on at home (parent in hospice etc) that could lead to a student failing classes and the parents not noticing.

There are only a few guidance counselors at each school. On a day to day basis they are dealing with behavioral and socio emotional issues, plus 504/IEP meetings, etc. You expect them to monitor all of the children's grades and reach out when they see a downward trend? That is completely unreasonable! The counselors at WMS have been great with our students when they've had challenges, FWIW.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am shocked at how many people are saying the onus is on the kids / parents. It is to an extent, but failing every class should be sending off alarm bells with everyone.

Good luck to you, OP. My DC went through WMS and is now at YHS, and I got no support from the school until DC was failing every class - a fact of which the attendees at the 504 meeting were unaware, even though it was the primary reason for the 504 - and had to be partially hospitalized for depression. And I raised the issue with teachers, counselors, admin, requested meetings, etc. ALL THROUGH MIDDLE SCHOOL, and WMS was USELESS.

Good luck to you, OP, and if you can leave APS, do it.

Don’t leave APS. Dig deeper and get your kid help. (Directed at OP- not you.) It may not be depression or a disability but it’s something and if you don’t address it now it will get worse through high school. Bailing on APS and acting like it’s the district’s issue doesn’t help your kid.

I think OP is trying to get their kid help. But WMS is widely known to be a really hard place to get help. Leaving is not an unreasonable decision.

What about the OP post indicates they've done anything to get their kid help? They expressed surprise they haven't heard from the school proactively about their kid failing. And I think a follow up saying the parent-teacher conferences weren't useful. (Which I agree those are not terribly useful but I don't think that's meant to be the place to address your kid is failing every class.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised the guidance counselor has not reached out. What is the point of guidance counselors if they don't reach out to parents in a situation like this? There could be something serious going on at home (parent in hospice etc) that could lead to a student failing classes and the parents not noticing.

There are only a few guidance counselors at each school. On a day to day basis they are dealing with behavioral and socio emotional issues, plus 504/IEP meetings, etc. You expect them to monitor all of the children's grades and reach out when they see a downward trend? That is completely unreasonable! The counselors at WMS have been great with our students when they've had challenges, FWIW.

Why is that unreasonable? No one's saying guidance counselors need to study every kid's grades and notice when a child's grade slips from an A to a B. But, yes, if the kid is failing every class, the guidance counselor should know that. I doubt the GC would even have to be proactive; they could probably set something up electronically to notify them when x occurs (e.g., 2 failing grades).

Lucky you for having responsive WMS counselors. We had a very serious family situation when DC was at WMS. I called and asked to speak to the counselor, and the front office was so loud that I had to shout so that the receptionist could hear my sensitive family information. The counselor got back to me - maybe before the end of the day, maybe it was the next day. Then she kept an eye on DC "from afar" - never met with DC independently. And it was serious, guys.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised the guidance counselor has not reached out. What is the point of guidance counselors if they don't reach out to parents in a situation like this? There could be something serious going on at home (parent in hospice etc) that could lead to a student failing classes and the parents not noticing.

There are only a few guidance counselors at each school. On a day to day basis they are dealing with behavioral and socio emotional issues, plus 504/IEP meetings, etc. You expect them to monitor all of the children's grades and reach out when they see a downward trend? That is completely unreasonable! The counselors at WMS have been great with our students when they've had challenges, FWIW.

Why is that unreasonable? No one's saying guidance counselors need to study every kid's grades and notice when a child's grade slips from an A to a B. But, yes, if the kid is failing every class, the guidance counselor should know that. I doubt the GC would even have to be proactive; they could probably set something up electronically to notify them when x occurs (e.g., 2 failing grades).

Lucky you for having responsive WMS counselors. We had a very serious family situation when DC was at WMS. I called and asked to speak to the counselor, and the front office was so loud that I had to shout so that the receptionist could hear my sensitive family information. The counselor got back to me - maybe before the end of the day, maybe it was the next day. Then she kept an eye on DC "from afar" - never met with DC independently. And it was serious, guys.

Parents pay a lot of money for that kind of caring at independent schools. A lack of effective counseling is one of the downsides to public

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With no scores below 50% (eg no 0s for missing assignments), mandatory retakes for anything under a B, how is anyone failing?

Retakes are mandatory in that we have to allow them. But a bunch of kids won’t bother doing the retake. They do not care. I will give an assignment and they say “what will my grade be if I don’t do this?” I tell them I don’t play number games like that. Do it or don’t and then deal with what the result is. You cannot imagine the amount of support we have to give to some kids to even pick up a pencil and LOOK like they’re attempting something. The kids who are gonna do it will do it and do fine but the ones who are failing even with all the buffers and protections we have in the policy to prevent failing are TRULY doing absolutely nothing despite reminders, redirects, help from teacher, retakes, etc. It’s wild. I don’t call anymore. It has never once resulted in the kid changing their behaviors. It just becomes me having to explain what I have done to justify why the kid won’t write down two sentences for an exit ticket.

So basically OP has a child who is willfully failing? Not turning in assignments or retaking tests that do well.

Honestly, the school will only care if their performance drops in the SOLs. Then you would get notice from the school

I don’t know that it’s willfully failing as much as it’s a belief that no matter what they will still get passed along and not actually fail.

I can't speak for other kids, but I know for my kid, who has dyslexia, that it is the opposite. He resists asking for help and doing retakes because of his belief that no matter what he will still not do well enough to be considered one of the smart kids, so why bother? It may seem like willfully failing, but its more like despair. And no, not all kids who are failing have dyslexia, but a disproportionate number of them do have undiagnosed dyslexia or other learning disabilities. Kids don't just tank their life for no reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well I can see it both ways but considering you can access your children’s grades 24/7, I think the onus is on the parents to reach out for support when they see multiple failing grades in ParentVUE.

This. You know he’s failing. Reach out yourself. this is your child’s education. It’s not like refusing to call a friend because they don’t initiate calls to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised the guidance counselor has not reached out. What is the point of guidance counselors if they don't reach out to parents in a situation like this? There could be something serious going on at home (parent in hospice etc) that could lead to a student failing classes and the parents not noticing.

There are only a few guidance counselors at each school. On a day to day basis they are dealing with behavioral and socio emotional issues, plus 504/IEP meetings, etc. You expect them to monitor all of the children's grades and reach out when they see a downward trend? That is completely unreasonable! The counselors at WMS have been great with our students when they've had challenges, FWIW.

Why is that unreasonable? No one's saying guidance counselors need to study every kid's grades and notice when a child's grade slips from an A to a B. But, yes, if the kid is failing every class, the guidance counselor should know that. I doubt the GC would even have to be proactive; they could probably set something up electronically to notify them when x occurs (e.g., 2 failing grades).

Lucky you for having responsive WMS counselors. We had a very serious family situation when DC was at WMS. I called and asked to speak to the counselor, and the front office was so loud that I had to shout so that the receptionist could hear my sensitive family information. The counselor got back to me - maybe before the end of the day, maybe it was the next day. Then she kept an eye on DC "from afar" - never met with DC independently. And it was serious, guys.

Not WMS but we've had great experiences with the guidance counselor at Swanson. Sincerely sorry you had a crappy one at WMS.

I don't view it either as their job to notice a student's grades are in a downward trend. You all are looking for some private school level hand holding.

[Anonymous]

I’m a teacher and unfortunately counselors are a mixed bag. Some are good. The ones at my school, I don’t think so. I had kids last year who ended up failing for the year and these are kids I was flagging to their counselors in Q1 as high risk for failing. Nothing was done that I ever saw. Even yesterday a counselor emailed teachers that one of the students is failing all their classes and can we do XYZ. Multiple teachers responded saying check the contact logs, we HAVE done XYZ, and if you’re a counselor noticing a kid is failing all classes you run it UP the chain and intervene, you don’t run it back down to individual teachers who have already done what they’re able. So no, not all counselors are super helpful but OP is the parent and she knows her kid is failing so it’s time to set up meetings to discuss what all the teachers are seeing which can then help determine the issue. Perhaps a child study is in order but nobody will know unless the teachers can confer together to try to establish common patterns they see that are affecting this child turning in work. This does not happen without robust parent involvement so get in there OP. We cannot do for you what you the parent has to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am surprised the guidance counselor has not reached out. What is the point of guidance counselors if they don't reach out to parents in a situation like this? There could be something serious going on at home (parent in hospice etc) that could lead to a student failing classes and the parents not noticing.

There are only a few guidance counselors at each school. On a day to day basis they are dealing with behavioral and socio emotional issues, plus 504/IEP meetings, etc. You expect them to monitor all of the children's grades and reach out when they see a downward trend? That is completely unreasonable! The counselors at WMS have been great with our students when they've had challenges, FWIW.

Why is that unreasonable? No one's saying guidance counselors need to study every kid's grades and notice when a child's grade slips from an A to a B. But, yes, if the kid is failing every class, the guidance counselor should know that. I doubt the GC would even have to be proactive; they could probably set something up electronically to notify them when x occurs (e.g., 2 failing grades).

Lucky you for having responsive WMS counselors. We had a very serious family situation when DC was at WMS. I called and asked to speak to the counselor, and the front office was so loud that I had to shout so that the receptionist could hear my sensitive family information. The counselor got back to me - maybe before the end of the day, maybe it was the next day. Then she kept an eye on DC "from afar" - never met with DC independently. And it was serious, guys.

Not WMS but we've had great experiences with the guidance counselor at Swanson. Sincerely sorry you had a crappy one at WMS.

I don't view it either as their job to notice a student's grades are in a downward trend. You all are looking for some private school level hand holding.

I think “downward trend” is different than failing multiple subjects. I agree with the pp who said this should be automated – if any kid’s grades drop below X level, the counsellor gets flagged to take action.

BUT parents should also be monitoring grades and get in contact when they notice an issue.

Kids should be monitoring in StudentVue, as well. I understand that a kid who is failing is probably not going to be the one to sound the alarm, but it’s god for kids to take ownership and track progress – and teachers make mistakes, too.

[Anonymous]

Obviously OP should reach out. But if there isn;t a requirement for counselors to document they have reached out to parents in these instances, there should be. It is frustrating to me that there is all this talk about equity in APS and then the school is depending on parents to reach out in situations like this. Obviously some parents have a lot more bandwidth to reach out than others.