Millennials: the house you grew up in vs. your house now

[Anonymous]

Our house is smaller and not as nice (finishes cheaper, for example) than my parents' house when I was growing up. However, it is in a more desirable location (better schools, less crime, more walkable, more of a community feel, in an area with more options for jobs). Our house is also smaller than my husband's parents' house when he was growing up. However, I think it is pretty equivalent to his parents' house in terms of the quality of the house itself. His parents lived out in the country on a beautiful piece of land in a wooded area by a creek. We live in a city. So different styles of living and just depends on what you prefer. I prefer being in the city myself but I do think where he grew up is pretty idyllic too.

[Anonymous]

Our house is smaller than the house I grew up in but that is intentional. We live in the city because we like a more urban life. I grew up in a large suburban house but my DH and I have no desire to live in the suburbs. My parents recently sold their house for less than what my house is currently worth. My DH grew up in a much more rural area. His parents house is probably around the same size as our house but it worth maybe 20% of our rowhouse in DC. It would blow his parents mind to know that houses in our neighborhood routinely sell for more then $1M.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our house is smaller than the house I grew up in but that is intentional. We live in the city because we like a more urban life. I grew up in a large suburban house but my DH and I have no desire to live in the suburbs. My parents recently sold their house for less than what my house is currently worth. My DH grew up in a much more rural area. His parents house is probably around the same size as our house but it worth maybe 20% of our rowhouse in DC. It would blow his parents mind to know that houses in our neighborhood routinely sell for more then $1M.

You sound very conceited.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Millennials have never grown up.

Very confused by this comment. This thread is mostly people saying that their house is smaller and not as nice as the large suburban homes they grew up in, but they value the location, good schools, walkability, etc. In what way is that an immature approach?

Reminds me of when I chose to live with roommates in my 20s so that I could live in the city where I'd have plenty of social opportunities while still saving money, and my dad told me that he was disappointed that I was still "living like a college student." He could not conceive of the fact that living in a place where I could socialize more would be good for my career and make it easier for me to find a partner (it did), and that having a roommate is a practical sacrifice that allowed me to save money for a future home purchase. He honestly would have preferred I live alone in the suburbs because that seemed more "adult" to him, even though it would have been incredibly isolating and a waste of money, as it would have required me to own a car or spend a ton on commuting.

Maybe it's Boomers who have never grown up, and are now getting lapped by their kids.

[Anonymous]

Home prices are a lot higher than they were 30 years ago or whenever your parents bought their home (https://fred.stlouisfed.org/graph/?g=kYEb )

There are more people trying to buy in the same neighborhoods. My parents bought their SFH in Bethesda for only a little bit more (when adjusting for inflation) than DH and I paid for our townhouse in Silver Spring/Wheaton last year. Of course my parents had much higher interest rates. They were also generally better off financially as they didn't have student loans, my dad had a pension and probably had a much better salary as they could afford a 15 year mortgage with my mom as a SAHM and two kids. We only have one, dual earners and feel a bit stretched, in part because we are maxing out our 401ks and saving for college (also paying for daycare). Everything is more expensive now, though my dad is also generally more successful than we are, which I don't spend a lot of time agonizing about (my dad never got home before 7 and my mom was miserable as a SAHM).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do they compare? I am struggling coming to terms with the fact that our likely forever home is older, smaller by 1k sq ft (more for DH), and in a less desirable neighborhood than the home I grew up in. We make way more than either set of parents ever did and they were in this area as well, but of course housing prices have rapidly outpaced income so comparable homes to those we grew up in are hundreds of thousands out of reach for us. What about you?

I grew up in the suburbs in a huge house. My kids live in a rowhouse in the city. Yet, the price of my home is double the one that I grew up in (in today's prices). Plus, I can walk to everything, whereas I had to drive to everything growing up. It's just a totally different lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

As yet another person who lives in a small city home after growing up in a big house in, in my case, a small town, a big reason I prefer our current home is that my kid almost never has to get in a car and that has enormous value to me. I had a friend and classmate die in a terrible car accident when I was a freshman in high school, an awful crash at an intersection in town that was known for them. I was scared of driving and didn't get my license until I had almost graduated high school, because of this. Cars are incredibly dangerous.

My kid knows how to ride the metro, can bike for miles at a time, has bus schedules memorized. I do still worry about her getting hit by a car when on her bike or on foot and we drill safety around these things as a result. But one reason I'd never trade our current home for the one I grew up in is that back then, I lived in the car -- car to school, car to activities, car to friends houses, etc. Almost everyone learned to drive as soon as they were allowed (I was a super outlier) and had a car in high school. I'm so glad my kid won't have to do that. I don't even know if we're going to teach her to drive -- it's a useful skill but I would also be fine with paying for drivers ed classes when she's in college and then helping her buy a car after if she doesn't wind up leaving somewhere she doesn't need one.

[Anonymous]

Gen X here Childhood home less than 1000 sq ft single story home in various state of disrepair. Lot less than ¼ acre in working poor neighborhood in central Florida. Surrounded by other old dilapidated homes.

Current home 4500 sq foot on ½ an acre with pool and wooded lot that backs into woods in an UMC Fairfax neighborhood.

Definitely an improvement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Millennials have never grown up.

Yeah, it is becoming more and more apparent. Unfortunately now they're raising kids. Yikes. This is an accident that's happening before our very eyes.

They have kids, daycare workers, teachers and grandparents are raising them

Ah, yes, because Boomers and Gen X never had teachers or grandparents help them raise their kids... (please note the dripping sarcasm).

[Anonymous]

Grew up in a mcmansion. There were rooms in it that we used maybe a couple times a year.

Live in a smaller 100 year old house in the city. There is a hotel down the street if we need a 5th bedroom for a day or two.

The 100 year old house is worth 3x the big mcmansion.

[Anonymous]

Grew up in the Bay Area so our 4bed/2ba in a decent MC suburb is still expensive for what it is.

Raising my young kids in a different state, in a different suburb. House is a little smaller but newer and better maintained. Like where I grew up, lots of kids in the neighborhood and walkable to schools. For me it was kind of a lateral move.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
If you move to an area that is like the area here was when your parents bought, you can have a big house.

What a crock.

Hmm let's see what AU Park was like when my parents bought back in 1985:

Nice housing stock, check!

Great public schools, check!

Short commute downtown, check!

Low crime, check!

Walkable to grocery stores and restaurants, check!

Affordable to regular middle class people, check!

Now let's jump to 2022, where exactly can you buy that checks all those boxes? My wife and I make significantly more than my parents did, inflation adjusted, when they bought their AU Park house and we are nowhere near being able to afford a SFH in that neighborhood or any neighborhood that checks even half of those boxes.

[Anonymous]

I grew up in a 1,000 sq ft house with a finished basement, and one car garage, back in the 50s. There were 5 children and 2 adults. Three bedrooms. The house was new and in a middle class area.

I now live in a 2500 sq ft house with a very small finished basement in an UMC area. My DD and her husband live with me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Millennials have never grown up.

Yeah, it is becoming more and more apparent. Unfortunately now they're raising kids. Yikes. This is an accident that's happening before our very eyes.

They have kids, daycare workers, teachers and grandparents are raising them

Ah, yes, because Boomers and Gen X never had teachers or grandparents help them raise their kids... (please note the dripping sarcasm).

In my case my parents and nearly all my friends parents were First Generation Irish, German, Italian etc. None of them had zero help from family or could afford to pay for anything at all to help raise their kids.

My co-workers and nieces and nephews who are Millennials it takes an entire village to raise two kids. Like day care during school year, camps in summer, after school programs, baby sitters, in-laws covering, maid, lawn service, handimen, tutors, pre-cooked meals. All for 1-2 kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do they compare? I am struggling coming to terms with the fact that our likely forever home is older, smaller by 1k sq ft (more for DH), and in a less desirable neighborhood than the home I grew up in. We make way more than either set of parents ever did and they were in this area as well, but of course housing prices have rapidly outpaced income so comparable homes to those we grew up in are hundreds of thousands out of reach for us. What about you?

It sounds like you are more dissatisfied with the house AND location than other posters. There are a lot of posters that grew up in the burbs in a big home and prefer a smaller place in a part of the city they really love. It doesn’t sound like this is the case for you.

Houses are much more expensive in relation to income now. Just keep in mind that this isn’t a ‘you’ problem and you certainly aren’t alone in it. The world is different now, don’t try to measure yourself by the standards of past generations.