I feel guilty not sending my kids to private

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We moved to McLean from Alexandria for their good public schools. It feels like everyone in our neighborhood sends their kids to private. It seems like the families who can afford private sent their kids to private during the pandemic if they weren’t already in private. We have a seven figure income and can easily afford private tuition.

Would you send your kid to private if you could easily afford it?

No. But I've noticed that it's more of a status thing in the Langley neighborhoods than the McLean neighborhoods to send kids to privates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry you found out the hard way that TONS of families in McLean send their kids to private school.

FWIW, we send one kid to public and one to private but we only send the one to private because he was not thriving in public. My default is public schools however I'm kind of glad we're almost done with the craziness that is now FCPS (our oldest is a rising senior). There is so much divisiveness now and so many people are trashing the teachers. I hate the current environment.

We moved to McLean with a preschool aged child and two kids in elementary. The vast majority of all our neighbors and kids from our preschool go private. Then at our elementary school, I noticed many of the public school students switched to private in 3rd and 7th grade. That does not include the kids who switched because of covid and did not come back.

The students who are left seem like those who can’t afford private school tuition.

I do have access to the Langley senior college admissions and they are fantastic this year. I don’t necessarily think my kids would get into a better college frlm a private school. I feel like the actual education would be better.

I also have access to the Langley college matriculation list, and apart from a few athlete recruits that went to the high tier Ivys, it was nothing special. I feel like the more affluent public schools will always have a few more at the top than the lower tier public schools, but apart from that the bottom 75% of every public school in FCPS is the same.

Op here. For our decision, we are comparing AP/AAP in McLean to privates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We moved to McLean from Alexandria for their good public schools. It feels like everyone in our neighborhood sends their kids to private. It seems like the families who can afford private sent their kids to private during the pandemic if they weren’t already in private. We have a seven figure income and can easily afford private tuition.

Would you send your kid to private if you could easily afford it?

Yes, I would. We don't have a seven figure income, but we still make sacrifices to send our children to private school. We've experienced both FCPS and private school, and the difference is night and day. Education is an important value in our family. It seems to go without saying that people would send their children to "the best" university that they can, but they often overlook the critical younger years where education and social development are even more important.

For the record, both my wife and I went to public school and the thought of sending my children to private school never occurred to me until failure after failure with FCPS drove us away. We can never go back.

Op here. Dh and I are also public school kids. We originally liked and wanted our children to go to school with kids like us when we were younger. They are doing well, get good grades, have been in the AAP program so have a solid peer group of smart UMC students and happy. That is why we have stayed in public. My kids are well liked and well behaved. I think they would do well in any environment.

If we didn’t have the youngest who started in preschool and friends all went to private, I probably would not feel as guilty since older kids have always been in public.

PP here. Well, with the older kids, I suppose if it ain't broke, don't fix it ... as they say. Our kids were in the AAP program but we found AAP to be underwhelming, especially as our oldest went through middle school; but that may vary by pyramid. AAP is definitely a MUST for students in FCPS these days---the district seems to have a robust program for special needs kids at the lower end, but the bulk of students stuck in the "gen ed" (general education) middle ground really seem to suffer from a lack of focus and efforts by the district. There's definitely a sort of desperate scramble to get their kids into AAP among the parents who are paying attention. I was paying close attention to the academics and even in the AAP program wasn't very happy.

Our kids were in elementary and middle school when we switched to private school and they quickly integrated into their new schools and are thriving. I've also noticed that that they are more calm and happier at home (which may be just that they're bickering less) which seems to be related to fewer "problem child" interactions at school. (Certainly with my then-middle schooler, the problems we had at FCPS with fights and other such nonsense have not been the case at private school.)

Honestly, the "normalcy" of private school in 2022 reminds me a lot of how public school was for me when I grew up in the 1980s/90s. So in many ways it feels more like the kids are getting a similar experience to what I got, at least in terms of academics and (thankfully) less politics in school. They're also making bonds with peers who, frankly, are usually wealthier than we are and who may form a solid network of friends and connections down the road. Time will tell.

I'd say trust your gut and your heart since you're in touch with your kids more than anyone else, and you'll know what's best for them. If you truly feel deep down that you're giving them the best education you can, just go with that.

[Anonymous]

You have the "Joneses" and that's not a good thing. Many have faltered with the disease. You do what is best for your kid not what others are doing. Private did provide a peace of mind during the pandemic peak. Things should return to normal this year. I hope you don't think privates are some utopian society.

[Anonymous]

Don't OP. I feel like private was a waste of money for me.

[Anonymous]

Did you make up your mind OP? Are you going to start preparing to apply to private schools in the coming school year?

[Anonymous]

If the fit was right and you denied your kid, shame, shame, shame.

[Anonymous]

Uneducated people do not understand how to properly educate children. Education begins and ends at home. School is only a supplement. Private is a waste of money. A well-educated individual has a free education, learning from everything in life. All of life is an education, if you understand how to teach. I could read and comprehend poetry at age two. My parents bought a set of encyclopedias for my gift at birth. I raised six well-educated individuals. My Mother created a program to reverse dyslexia in my youngest. He was reading, writing, and comprehending on a college level by middle school. I grew up in a hollow in the Appalachian Mountains. Low-income and wealthy.....surrounded by books and nature and freedom. I know everything. There's nothing I can't do, or figure out how to do. Don't waste money on private. Spend your money educating your kids properly. You'll raise individual freethinkers who aren't afraid to go their own way and who do not need your financial support after 18 if you do it my way. Of course Private schools want your money. They don't want you to know that it could be better spent elsewhere. Advice from a Jack of All Trades, Master of Whatever I Want to Master. Master of Puppets and all that jazz. Think outside the box. OP.

[Anonymous]

There are kids privates need more than they need privates. No reason to move the kid if the kid loves school.

[Anonymous]

I would say about 50% of the people in my McLean neighborhood, next to Franklin Sherman ES, send their kids to private schools like Sidwell, Potomac, St. Albans. People in Mclean have a lot of disposable income to afford 50k/yr private school, per kid. One of my kids attended Potomac school and the academics there are top notch, a lot of rich people there too.

[Anonymous]

Yes, if I earned 1m+ in income, my kids would be in private school. I might not even live in McLean either. Might go back to MoCo

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Uneducated people do not understand how to properly educate children. Education begins and ends at home. School is only a supplement. Private is a waste of money. A well-educated individual has a free education, learning from everything in life. All of life is an education, if you understand how to teach. I could read and comprehend poetry at age two. My parents bought a set of encyclopedias for my gift at birth. I raised six well-educated individuals. My Mother created a program to reverse dyslexia in my youngest. He was reading, writing, and comprehending on a college level by middle school. I grew up in a hollow in the Appalachian Mountains. Low-income and wealthy.....surrounded by books and nature and freedom. I know everything. There's nothing I can't do, or figure out how to do. Don't waste money on private. Spend your money educating your kids properly. You'll raise individual freethinkers who aren't afraid to go their own way and who do not need your financial support after 18 if you do it my way. Of course Private schools want your money. They don't want you to know that it could be better spent elsewhere. Advice from a Jack of All Trades, Master of Whatever I Want to Master. Master of Puppets and all that jazz. Think outside the box. OP.

Not every mom around the beltway is like an Appalachian housewife homeschooling their kids. I am a breadwinner, I don't have time for that. So I buy education. And I doubt you were truly reading at age 2, but cool story bro. Yeah, every kid can do that if they were like Appalachian homeschoolers

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Uneducated people do not understand how to properly educate children. Education begins and ends at home. School is only a supplement. Private is a waste of money. A well-educated individual has a free education, learning from everything in life. All of life is an education, if you understand how to teach. I could read and comprehend poetry at age two. My parents bought a set of encyclopedias for my gift at birth. I raised six well-educated individuals. My Mother created a program to reverse dyslexia in my youngest. He was reading, writing, and comprehending on a college level by middle school. I grew up in a hollow in the Appalachian Mountains. Low-income and wealthy.....surrounded by books and nature and freedom. I know everything. There's nothing I can't do, or figure out how to do. Don't waste money on private. Spend your money educating your kids properly. You'll raise individual freethinkers who aren't afraid to go their own way and who do not need your financial support after 18 if you do it my way. Of course Private schools want your money. They don't want you to know that it could be better spent elsewhere. Advice from a Jack of All Trades, Master of Whatever I Want to Master. Master of Puppets and all that jazz. Think outside the box. OP.

Not every mom around the beltway is like an Appalachian housewife homeschooling their kids. I am a breadwinner, I don't have time for that. So I buy education. And I doubt you were truly reading at age 2, but cool story bro. Yeah, every kid can do that if they were like Appalachian homeschoolers

I really don't understand how so many "well-educated" people on this forum cannot pick up on satire.

[Anonymous]

I went to an Ivy League school from a public school education in NJ. The DMV is different. I would absolutely send my kid to private.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well, you moved somewhere to be around rich people because you thought they were better. Don’t be surprised that the people around you choose to put their kids with even richer people because they think they are even better.

You sound fun.