When both parents have jobs where sudden days off aren’t feasible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would you do if you got sick? My kids wanted their mom around when they were sick. Trying not to judge, but hopefully your employer can be understanding. Instead of coming up with backup childcare plans, figure out back up work plans.

My kids are very comfortable with their loving nanny. Plus colds don’t require mom.

Right, but not all illnesses are colds. So what would OP do when his/her child is sick?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you for all the responses. Neither DH nor I will leave our careers for ones with more flexible demands.

We’re going to go with a full-time nanny plus use back up care and MIL if nanny is sick. Two days a week we do have a housekeeper and I’m going to talk to her about possibly doing a little childcare if something catastrophic happens to nanny, backup care and MIL on the weeks where DH is away.

Ok no one cares

Grow up, PP, and get a little life for yourself.

NP. No one does care.

So why read the thread? Seriously, I never understand comments like yours. Why do you force yourself to read something you don’t care about?

The whining and complaining amuse me.

Then, yes, you really do need a life. You’re presence is pretty pathetic, PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would you do if you got sick? My kids wanted their mom around when they were sick. Trying not to judge, but hopefully your employer can be understanding. Instead of coming up with backup childcare plans, figure out back up work plans.

My kids are very comfortable with their loving nanny. Plus colds don’t require mom.

Right, but not all illnesses are colds. So what would OP do when his/her child is sick?

Severely ill, I would stay home and miss work, obviously.

-OP here. The point is I cannot miss work for the common cold or nanny being out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would you do if you got sick? My kids wanted their mom around when they were sick. Trying not to judge, but hopefully your employer can be understanding. Instead of coming up with backup childcare plans, figure out back up work plans.

Again, it’s not the flexible employer in jobs like these. It’s thinks like postponing your knee replacement because your surgeon’s kid had a cold and his nanny was sick or cancelling your flight because the pilot’s nanny had the flu.

The vast majority of posters here have office jobs. They don’t understand how others cannot miss work unless it’s an emergency. It’s not self-importance - it’s the nature of the work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am assuming nanny care plus a back up is our best bet, correct? My schedule is usually 8 to 3 while DH is working out of town 28 weeks a year (home every weekend). My MIL is also retired and lives a few streets away and it excited to care for the baby.

Who was your backup if nanny got sick? I don’t want to make my MIL our back up if she has plans.

Contract with a back up service.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What would you do if you got sick? My kids wanted their mom around when they were sick. Trying not to judge, but hopefully your employer can be understanding. Instead of coming up with backup childcare plans, figure out back up work plans.

This is about when the nanny is sick, not the children...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would you do if you got sick? My kids wanted their mom around when they were sick. Trying not to judge, but hopefully your employer can be understanding. Instead of coming up with backup childcare plans, figure out back up work plans.

Again, it’s not the flexible employer in jobs like these. It’s thinks like postponing your knee replacement because your surgeon’s kid had a cold and his nanny was sick or cancelling your flight because the pilot’s nanny had the flu.

The vast majority of posters here have office jobs. They don’t understand how others cannot miss work unless it’s an emergency. It’s not self-importance - it’s the nature of the work.

Critical jobs always have backup personnel; there is another doctor available, another firefighter. Get over yourself. I work in such an industry and the assumption is the work has to get done, so you staff accordingly not depend on one person.

Maybe a particular neurosurgeon for a particularly complicated case, that’s a once a year event.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you for all the responses. Neither DH nor I will leave our careers for ones with more flexible demands.

We’re going to go with a full-time nanny plus use back up care and MIL if nanny is sick. Two days a week we do have a housekeeper and I’m going to talk to her about possibly doing a little childcare if something catastrophic happens to nanny, backup care and MIL on the weeks where DH is away.

Maybe I misunderstood your post, it sounded like you were asking when both have jobs don’t allow days off: the answer is ALWAYS one of you changes to a job that does allow it.

What you don’t understand is how absent you will be from your kids life if you both work like that; the nanny years are actually the easiest schedule wise.

And you keep talking about the nanny being sick — who cares for kid when kid is sick? Backup daycare won’t take them. Nanny may rightfully refuse. Elderly MIL seems like bad deal. I guess the nanny is your assumption, which really shows the kid that they are an accessory to your important life and career.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would you do if you got sick? My kids wanted their mom around when they were sick. Trying not to judge, but hopefully your employer can be understanding. Instead of coming up with backup childcare plans, figure out back up work plans.

Again, it’s not the flexible employer in jobs like these. It’s thinks like postponing your knee replacement because your surgeon’s kid had a cold and his nanny was sick or cancelling your flight because the pilot’s nanny had the flu.

The vast majority of posters here have office jobs. They don’t understand how others cannot miss work unless it’s an emergency. It’s not self-importance - it’s the nature of the work.

Critical jobs always have backup personnel; there is another doctor available, another firefighter. Get over yourself. I work in such an industry and the assumption is the work has to get done, so you staff accordingly not depend on one person.

Maybe a particular neurosurgeon for a particularly complicated case, that’s a once a year event.

No, they really don’t, OP. There is no “back-up surgeons” ready to jump in when a surgery is cancelled. Emergency surgery-sure, but not cancer surgeries, joint replacements, etc. The patient just has to wait. And in oncological surgeries, that is beyond emotionally traumatic.

You clearly know nothing about how hospitals work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you for all the responses. Neither DH nor I will leave our careers for ones with more flexible demands.

We’re going to go with a full-time nanny plus use back up care and MIL if nanny is sick. Two days a week we do have a housekeeper and I’m going to talk to her about possibly doing a little childcare if something catastrophic happens to nanny, backup care and MIL on the weeks where DH is away.

Maybe I misunderstood your post, it sounded like you were asking when both have jobs don’t allow days off: the answer is ALWAYS one of you changes to a job that does allow it.

What you don’t understand is how absent you will be from your kids life if you both work like that; the nanny years are actually the easiest schedule wise.

And you keep talking about the nanny being sick — who cares for kid when kid is sick? Backup daycare won’t take them. Nanny may rightfully refuse. Elderly MIL seems like bad deal. I guess the nanny is your assumption, which really shows the kid that they are an accessory to your important life and career.

I’m a nanny and have always cared for my charges when they get sick. It’s never been an issue. All the nannies I know do as well. Kids get colds and fevers - nbd.

And OP was never considering daycare. Bright Horizons has a in home temp nanny program.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you for all the responses. Neither DH nor I will leave our careers for ones with more flexible demands.

We’re going to go with a full-time nanny plus use back up care and MIL if nanny is sick. Two days a week we do have a housekeeper and I’m going to talk to her about possibly doing a little childcare if something catastrophic happens to nanny, backup care and MIL on the weeks where DH is away.

Maybe I misunderstood your post, it sounded like you were asking when both have jobs don’t allow days off: the answer is ALWAYS one of you changes to a job that does allow it.

What you don’t understand is how absent you will be from your kids life if you both work like that; the nanny years are actually the easiest schedule wise.

And you keep talking about the nanny being sick — who cares for kid when kid is sick? Backup daycare won’t take them. Nanny may rightfully refuse. Elderly MIL seems like bad deal. I guess the nanny is your assumption, which really shows the kid that they are an accessory to your important life and career.

OP works like six hours a day! I think her child will be fine!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would you do if you got sick? My kids wanted their mom around when they were sick. Trying not to judge, but hopefully your employer can be understanding. Instead of coming up with backup childcare plans, figure out back up work plans.

Again, it’s not the flexible employer in jobs like these. It’s thinks like postponing your knee replacement because your surgeon’s kid had a cold and his nanny was sick or cancelling your flight because the pilot’s nanny had the flu.

The vast majority of posters here have office jobs. They don’t understand how others cannot miss work unless it’s an emergency. It’s not self-importance - it’s the nature of the work.

Critical jobs always have backup personnel; there is another doctor available, another firefighter. Get over yourself. I work in such an industry and the assumption is the work has to get done, so you staff accordingly not depend on one person.

Maybe a particular neurosurgeon for a particularly complicated case, that’s a once a year event.

Actually they do not. If I was your attorney and you were waiting months for a trial date, you certainly do not want me to cancel your trial because my nanny is sick. It could take months to get a another date. And there is a shortage of airline pilots right now. If a pilot calls in unavailable, the chances of getting another pilot are slim. Ask me how I know that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you for all the responses. Neither DH nor I will leave our careers for ones with more flexible demands.

We’re going to go with a full-time nanny plus use back up care and MIL if nanny is sick. Two days a week we do have a housekeeper and I’m going to talk to her about possibly doing a little childcare if something catastrophic happens to nanny, backup care and MIL on the weeks where DH is away.

Maybe I misunderstood your post, it sounded like you were asking when both have jobs don’t allow days off: the answer is ALWAYS one of you changes to a job that does allow it.

What you don’t understand is how absent you will be from your kids life if you both work like that; the nanny years are actually the easiest schedule wise.

And you keep talking about the nanny being sick — who cares for kid when kid is sick? Backup daycare won’t take them. Nanny may rightfully refuse. Elderly MIL seems like bad deal. I guess the nanny is your assumption, which really shows the kid that they are an accessory to your important life and career.

This is absolutely not true. Sure if you just have an unpleasant workplace you change jobs. I know dual-physician and dual-surgeon etc. families and they aren't just calling out sick all the time. They have nannies and backup care and it's really only extenuating circumstances that have them calling out sick. Not typical runny noses and stomach bugs and low fevers.

I say this as a fed atty with a flexible job and I take plenty of sick leave. I prefer it. But others are making decisions based on their own fields and it's crazy to say ALWAYS about something like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would you do if you got sick? My kids wanted their mom around when they were sick. Trying not to judge, but hopefully your employer can be understanding. Instead of coming up with backup childcare plans, figure out back up work plans.

My kids are very comfortable with their loving nanny. Plus colds don’t require mom.

Right, but not all illnesses are colds. So what would OP do when his/her child is sick?

Severely ill, I would stay home and miss work, obviously.

-OP here. The point is I cannot miss work for the common cold or nanny being out.

You should have thought about that before having kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would you do if you got sick? My kids wanted their mom around when they were sick. Trying not to judge, but hopefully your employer can be understanding. Instead of coming up with backup childcare plans, figure out back up work plans.

Again, it’s not the flexible employer in jobs like these. It’s thinks like postponing your knee replacement because your surgeon’s kid had a cold and his nanny was sick or cancelling your flight because the pilot’s nanny had the flu.

The vast majority of posters here have office jobs. They don’t understand how others cannot miss work unless it’s an emergency. It’s not self-importance - it’s the nature of the work.

Critical jobs always have backup personnel; there is another doctor available, another firefighter. Get over yourself. I work in such an industry and the assumption is the work has to get done, so you staff accordingly not depend on one person.

Maybe a particular neurosurgeon for a particularly complicated case, that’s a once a year event.

I work in a hospital. They are not always able to pull out a backup surgeon from the closet. The day’s schedule can get seriously messed up if someone suddenly calls out.