If you WFH, how much do you interact with your spouse during the work day?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How do dual WFH all have so much time to hang out?

Kids are in school only 6 hrs, and if they span enough grades you can have an elem leaving at 9am and middle school home by 2:30pm. We can work before and after that but the house does get more chaotic when they are home, so those 5 hours need to be focused on work not gym and quickies.

Or maybe it’s only people with high school students and long tenure in their jobs — so you can kind of coast at work and kid will be after school activies and take the late bus?


You sound envious. Some of us make our own schedules because we are senior enough and yes, our kids are older.


Uh yeah I’m envious. Sorry you missed that memo. I want to be paid to nap and go on walks like an old duffer
Anonymous
I can't quantify it. The printer is in his office, so I go in for that. If we are both off calls at the same time we might chat. We eat lunch together.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:All day. I work up in the converted attic. He works on the main level. But, he makes my latte and oatmeal and we split up morning school runs for our MS and HS kids.

We workout together mid-morning. Sometimes a quickie somewhere in the work day.

We might hit Whole Foods together after the workout one day a week for groceries.

Afternoon everyone is home. Dinners together--alternate who makes it. Kids different sports team runs. Couch at 9pm to watch Netflix.

I have been WAH since 2005, but husband never was (just one day every other week) until Covid and he's been full-time WAH since then. He used to have long hours and it would just be by text. IF he worked out--he had to do after the day was over and would get home after dinner. This has been so much better for our marriage and we both really are loving it.

He has been offered pretty crazy $ to take on a new role but it would require a lot of stress and possibly less at home, if at all. At 50, we are thinking time is now more important. His prior schedule did a number on our marriage since he was out of the house so much and got home so late in the evenings.
This sounds so great!


It also sounds like they’re the reason companies are calling people back to the office. They’re not working…
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How do dual WFH all have so much time to hang out?

Kids are in school only 6 hrs, and if they span enough grades you can have an elem leaving at 9am and middle school home by 2:30pm. We can work before and after that but the house does get more chaotic when they are home, so those 5 hours need to be focused on work not gym and quickies.

Or maybe it’s only people with high school students and long tenure in their jobs — so you can kind of coast at work and kid will be after school activies and take the late bus?


You sound envious. Some of us make our own schedules because we are senior enough and yes, our kids are older.


Uh yeah I’m envious. Sorry you missed that memo. I want to be paid to nap and go on walks like an old duffer


You are reading the responses of a bunch of GS-15 who don't actually do anything and aren't held accountable. They used to have to go in, but now they are "senior enough" to fake it in the current WFH scenario.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:All day. I work up in the converted attic. He works on the main level. But, he makes my latte and oatmeal and we split up morning school runs for our MS and HS kids.

We workout together mid-morning. Sometimes a quickie somewhere in the work day.

We might hit Whole Foods together after the workout one day a week for groceries.

Afternoon everyone is home. Dinners together--alternate who makes it. Kids different sports team runs. Couch at 9pm to watch Netflix.

I have been WAH since 2005, but husband never was (just one day every other week) until Covid and he's been full-time WAH since then. He used to have long hours and it would just be by text. IF he worked out--he had to do after the day was over and would get home after dinner. This has been so much better for our marriage and we both really are loving it.

He has been offered pretty crazy $ to take on a new role but it would require a lot of stress and possibly less at home, if at all. At 50, we are thinking time is now more important. His prior schedule did a number on our marriage since he was out of the house so much and got home so late in the evenings.
This sounds so great!


It also sounds like they’re the reason companies are calling people back to the office. They’re not working…


My husband works for himself, consultant. My work is production based so it's verifiable. My company found the WAH workers to be 35% more productive than the in-house workers when they started WAH two decades ago.

IF you read studies on WAH, this is found to be the case across industries. Cutting out the commute each way and the hassle of getting ready and make happy workers with access to everything at their fingertips actually make them work harder and are more dedicated to their work. You should see the amount of useless meetings, long lunches and 'water-cooler' BS that want on in the office.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:All day. I work up in the converted attic. He works on the main level. But, he makes my latte and oatmeal and we split up morning school runs for our MS and HS kids.

We workout together mid-morning. Sometimes a quickie somewhere in the work day.

We might hit Whole Foods together after the workout one day a week for groceries.

Afternoon everyone is home. Dinners together--alternate who makes it. Kids different sports team runs. Couch at 9pm to watch Netflix.

I have been WAH since 2005, but husband never was (just one day every other week) until Covid and he's been full-time WAH since then. He used to have long hours and it would just be by text. IF he worked out--he had to do after the day was over and would get home after dinner. This has been so much better for our marriage and we both really are loving it.

He has been offered pretty crazy $ to take on a new role but it would require a lot of stress and possibly less at home, if at all. At 50, we are thinking time is now more important. His prior schedule did a number on our marriage since he was out of the house so much and got home so late in the evenings.
This sounds so great!


It also sounds like they’re the reason companies are calling people back to the office. They’re not working…


My husband works for himself, consultant. My work is production based so it's verifiable. My company found the WAH workers to be 35% more productive than the in-house workers when they started WAH two decades ago.

IF you read studies on WAH, this is found to be the case across industries. Cutting out the commute each way and the hassle of getting ready and make happy workers with access to everything at their fingertips actually make them work harder and are more dedicated to their work. You should see the amount of useless meetings, long lunches and 'water-cooler' BS that want on in the office.


"Several studies over the past few months show productivity while working remotely from home is better than working in an office setting. On average, those who work from home spend 10 minutes less a day being unproductive, work one more day a week, and are 47% more productive."

https://www.apollotechnical.com/working-from-home-productivity-statistics/

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2021-04-22/yes-working-from-home-makes-you-more-productive-study-finds

https://www.shrm.org/hr-today/news/hr-news/pages/study-productivity-shift-remote-work-covid-coronavirus.aspx
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How do dual WFH all have so much time to hang out?

Kids are in school only 6 hrs, and if they span enough grades you can have an elem leaving at 9am and middle school home by 2:30pm. We can work before and after that but the house does get more chaotic when they are home, so those 5 hours need to be focused on work not gym and quickies.

Or maybe it’s only people with high school students and long tenure in their jobs — so you can kind of coast at work and kid will be after school activies and take the late bus?


You sound envious. Some of us make our own schedules because we are senior enough and yes, our kids are older.


Uh yeah I’m envious. Sorry you missed that memo. I want to be paid to nap and go on walks like an old duffer


You'll get there one day - I'm 46.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How do dual WFH all have so much time to hang out?

Kids are in school only 6 hrs, and if they span enough grades you can have an elem leaving at 9am and middle school home by 2:30pm. We can work before and after that but the house does get more chaotic when they are home, so those 5 hours need to be focused on work not gym and quickies.

Or maybe it’s only people with high school students and long tenure in their jobs — so you can kind of coast at work and kid will be after school activies and take the late bus?


You sound envious. Some of us make our own schedules because we are senior enough and yes, our kids are older.


Uh yeah I’m envious. Sorry you missed that memo. I want to be paid to nap and go on walks like an old duffer


You are reading the responses of a bunch of GS-15 who don't actually do anything and aren't held accountable. They used to have to go in, but now they are "senior enough" to fake it in the current WFH scenario.


Nope. All the slackers are lobbying hard to go back in person. When you WFH at my agency, IT monitors the amount of time connected and active. It drives our older lawyers crazy as they want to print and review docs
on paper. We also need to email the work plan on Monday and show the progress and analysis by Friday. If you are in the office, you are not required to do any of these, so underperformers hate telework. They usually come in late, play on the phone, take 2 hour lunch, then gym downstairs and shower and leave at 4 so they won't miss the MARC/VRE.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How do dual WFH all have so much time to hang out?

Kids are in school only 6 hrs, and if they span enough grades you can have an elem leaving at 9am and middle school home by 2:30pm. We can work before and after that but the house does get more chaotic when they are home, so those 5 hours need to be focused on work not gym and quickies.

Or maybe it’s only people with high school students and long tenure in their jobs — so you can kind of coast at work and kid will be after school activies and take the late bus?


You sound envious. Some of us make our own schedules because we are senior enough and yes, our kids are older.


Uh yeah I’m envious. Sorry you missed that memo. I want to be paid to nap and go on walks like an old duffer


You are reading the responses of a bunch of GS-15 who don't actually do anything and aren't held accountable. They used to have to go in, but now they are "senior enough" to fake it in the current WFH scenario.


Nope. All the slackers are lobbying hard to go back in person. When you WFH at my agency, IT monitors the amount of time connected and active. It drives our older lawyers crazy as they want to print and review docs
on paper. We also need to email the work plan on Monday and show the progress and analysis by Friday. If you are in the office, you are not required to do any of these, so underperformers hate telework. They usually come in late, play on the phone, take 2 hour lunch, then gym downstairs and shower and leave at 4 so they won't miss the MARC/VRE.


We must work at the same place . The people that don't want to around their stay-at-home spouse/kids (if they are pre-school) or their WAH spouse also are clawing to get back to the Office. They will stay longer too (not working) just because they don't want to go home.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We don’t interact at all except for a quick chat while we prep lunch and head back to our desks. Our preschool still has “covid hours” and so we don’t have time for lunch or breaks. One of us has to start at 9:15 due to the start time and one of us has to leave at 4pm to pick up.


Both of us are on the phone / in meetings 5-6 hours a day. All these people eating lunch, working out, running errands - how many hours a week do you work? What are your hours?


These are the people screaming that it’s so horrible that so many employers want people back in office even part time because they’re “so much more productive at home.”
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:All day. I work up in the converted attic. He works on the main level. But, he makes my latte and oatmeal and we split up morning school runs for our MS and HS kids.

We workout together mid-morning. Sometimes a quickie somewhere in the work day.

We might hit Whole Foods together after the workout one day a week for groceries.

Afternoon everyone is home. Dinners together--alternate who makes it. Kids different sports team runs. Couch at 9pm to watch Netflix.

I have been WAH since 2005, but husband never was (just one day every other week) until Covid and he's been full-time WAH since then. He used to have long hours and it would just be by text. IF he worked out--he had to do after the day was over and would get home after dinner. This has been so much better for our marriage and we both really are loving it.

He has been offered pretty crazy $ to take on a new role but it would require a lot of stress and possibly less at home, if at all. At 50, we are thinking time is now more important. His prior schedule did a number on our marriage since he was out of the house so much and got home so late in the evenings.
This sounds so great!


It also sounds like they’re the reason companies are calling people back to the office. They’re not working…


+1,000
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:How do dual WFH all have so much time to hang out?

Kids are in school only 6 hrs, and if they span enough grades you can have an elem leaving at 9am and middle school home by 2:30pm. We can work before and after that but the house does get more chaotic when they are home, so those 5 hours need to be focused on work not gym and quickies.

Or maybe it’s only people with high school students and long tenure in their jobs — so you can kind of coast at work and kid will be after school activies and take the late bus?


You sound envious. Some of us make our own schedules because we are senior enough and yes, our kids are older.


Uh yeah I’m envious. Sorry you missed that memo. I want to be paid to nap and go on walks like an old duffer


You are reading the responses of a bunch of GS-15 who don't actually do anything and aren't held accountable. They used to have to go in, but now they are "senior enough" to fake it in the current WFH scenario.


Nope. All the slackers are lobbying hard to go back in person. When you WFH at my agency, IT monitors the amount of time connected and active. It drives our older lawyers crazy as they want to print and review docs
on paper. We also need to email the work plan on Monday and show the progress and analysis by Friday. If you are in the office, you are not required to do any of these, so underperformers hate telework. They usually come in late, play on the phone, take 2 hour lunch, then gym downstairs and shower and leave at 4 so they won't miss the MARC/VRE.


We must work at the same place . The people that don't want to around their stay-at-home spouse/kids (if they are pre-school) or their WAH spouse also are clawing to get back to the Office. They will stay longer too (not working) just because they don't want to go home.


Yes! One of the guys in the office told me he hates his wife but he doesn't want to split his 401k. It's not my fault that you have marital problems and want to look at Sue's butt.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We don’t interact at all except for a quick chat while we prep lunch and head back to our desks. Our preschool still has “covid hours” and so we don’t have time for lunch or breaks. One of us has to start at 9:15 due to the start time and one of us has to leave at 4pm to pick up.


Both of us are on the phone / in meetings 5-6 hours a day. All these people eating lunch, working out, running errands - how many hours a week do you work? What are your hours?


These are the people screaming that it’s so horrible that so many employers want people back in office even part time because they’re “so much more productive at home.”


Productivity is not just measured between 8-5. If someone works 530-8 and then 9-12 and 1-4 then that works for them. They get AM time with their kids. 1hour with their spouse or by themselves kid free and are open for afternoon with their family or sports.

Compare that to someone who leaves home at 530. Gets in at 630. Works 630-12. Takes 1 hour for lunch or working out. And then works 1-4 to make it home by 5/530.

I can wake up at 5am if I know I get my work I, a workout, time for sex or spouse bonding, walks outside when needed, etc. Happiness is productive. Spending time with your kids and on your marriage and by God, on yourself!, Is productive. And if you can do all that AND still clock in those 8.5 hours why shouldn't you?
Anonymous
For context, we’re both Feds; DH is a GS-15 supervisor and I’m a 14 team lead. Very flexible hours, but busy.

We walk the kids to and from school each day together. How often we see each other during the day really varies. Some days we can walk the dog together, or have multiple brief catch ups, or even a quickie. Other days, we barely acknowledge each other because we’re so busy.

FWIW, he’s going to full remote and never wants to go back to the office. I’m frustrated with never seeing my coworkers and want to go back 2-3 days/week. I would have a short commute, which is part of it. DH and I get along well, but our house isn’t big enough to accommodate both of us WAH all the time, especially when I almost never have the house to myself.
Anonymous
We interact quite a bit. He and I technically do the same thing but for competing companies. So we talk to each other about our actual jobs because we do the same thing and know lots of the same people, and we go to the kitchen if we hear the other one, and send lots of Tiktoks all day. We also go to the grocery store together during work hours (late morning) once or twice a week. We always do our outdoor workouts separate.

I have never been happier.
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