why do i suddenly hate all my stuff and what small changes can i make to like it again?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t exactly hate everything in my house, but I’ve been here for a good while an it is reaching a point where I want to make a lot of changes and do a lot of remodeling. The amount of what I want to do is overwhelming and so I just sit on it rather than fix anything. I occasionally change around a few throw pillows or add a new mirror or something and that makes me feel a bit better but my issues with my house are bigger than that.

This is OP - and we've got that stuff, too, but I am trying not to think about it! Maybe that's underlying a bunch of this.

What do you want to do with your house?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All of a sudden I can't stand our couches, the paint color, the coffee tables, any of it. I don't have the $$ for a total overhaul of our stuff - but I can probably put maybe $1000 into getting some stuff that'll help me love my house again. I guess I should try rearranging some things - and then: how do I come to love my house again?!

I think if you spend anytime on social media, looking at magazines or watching makeover shows you will feel discontent. This is coming from a person who can relate to the saying that “comparison is the thief of joy”.

Pp here. I forgot to include my remedy. Less time comparing and more time being grateful. That’s helping me a lot. Otherwise, some new pillows, sheets, blankets go a long way.

This is OP - and I definitely am not comparing myself to HGTV and I'm not even on Instagram. My Facebook is mostly about dog rescue so it's couches covered in dog hair! I am super grateful and ALSO my couch looks like sht and six years into living here I can't get the art right in our TV room!! Pillows and blankets might be the thing for now. And decluttering and just moving some stuff around.

The art is probably too high. It almost always is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All of a sudden I can't stand our couches, the paint color, the coffee tables, any of it. I don't have the $$ for a total overhaul of our stuff - but I can probably put maybe $1000 into getting some stuff that'll help me love my house again. I guess I should try rearranging some things - and then: how do I come to love my house again?!

I think if you spend anytime on social media, looking at magazines or watching makeover shows you will feel discontent. This is coming from a person who can relate to the saying that “comparison is the thief of joy”.

Pp here. I forgot to include my remedy. Less time comparing and more time being grateful. That’s helping me a lot. Otherwise, some new pillows, sheets, blankets go a long way.

This is OP - and I definitely am not comparing myself to HGTV and I'm not even on Instagram. My Facebook is mostly about dog rescue so it's couches covered in dog hair! I am super grateful and ALSO my couch looks like sht and six years into living here I can't get the art right in our TV room!! Pillows and blankets might be the thing for now. And decluttering and just moving some stuff around.

The art is probably too high. It almost always is.

How many inches from the floor is the middle of the art?

[Anonymous]

I love design but I can't keep remodeling every 5 minutes. So, I create albums for each of my rooms on my iphone. Then I take pictures of all the things I have that I actually like, put them in the various albums, and I just kind of futz with them, adding screenshots of things I find online that I like as I go. (I know, it's like Pinterest, but it's easier for me.)

Anyway, in the end I will have each room planned out with things I have and things I want. But a lot of the time, this exercise simply keeps me from actual shopping. I will get bored with the perfect image on my phone and just feel fine with what I already have.

But if you take a photo of something you have, and it's just fug everywhere, then I would say get rid of it. And if everything looks bad, and nothing goes together, it might actually be time to remodel.

[Anonymous]

I am doing major declutter this fall. Slowly working my way around the house, keeping it interesting by tackling 1-2 things at a time- regardless of what room they are in. I have moved furniture around, changed art, rearranged closets, etc. It hasn’t helped with wanting to do more- but it is distracting me and giving me something to focus my energy on. It costs nothing. And I am hoping, when I have done it all, I will have a better idea of what I actually want to do with my budget to “spruce up” the house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People need change. Unless it’s a very special object that has value beyond function and looks (like it reminds you of your beloved grandmother or something), this happens to most people with most things.

You can make a big impact with changing simple decor like throw pillows and flowers, as OP mentioned. You can also switch around the layout and add cheap art. Paint will make a huge difference.

Also you can do a gratitude practice. And not just “I’m grateful that at least I have a couch.” It will probably help. But I would make a few changes too.

OP here and I DEFINITELY do that - partly because I am so superstitious that I feel like if I am not constantly knocking wood and whatnot the evil eye is going to come and take it all away. And yet at the same time: I would love a new couch and new paint and man

(Knock wood knock wood - please don't take away all my stuff evil eye!)

Ha! I'm the same...

[Anonymous]

I LIke the concept of "shopping the house." Or just playing around... Moving things around can make a big difference, I have my little small areas where I play around, often seasonally, and it helps. The chair in the foyer is wicker in the summer, wood or a dining room chair (striped slipcovered parsons in yellow stripe) in fall. White ironstone on mantel in summer, (battery operated) candles and wheat in fall. I take off chandelier shades for awhile in summer and then put on new ones in the fall and winter...If you keep the foundation neutral and clear out the old, you can then eventually just play around with flowers, your own furniture, etc And then every few years do a bigger clean out, maybe it's just time for that. Yes on used!

[Anonymous]

We did a household item swap in our neighborhood about a decade ago. I got two new to me lamps, a bookcase, some sofa pillows, and a painting. I got rid of two side tables, a lamp, a chair, and some odds and ends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am doing major declutter this fall. Slowly working my way around the house, keeping it interesting by tackling 1-2 things at a time- regardless of what room they are in. I have moved furniture around, changed art, rearranged closets, etc. It hasn’t helped with wanting to do more- but it is distracting me and giving me something to focus my energy on. It costs nothing. And I am hoping, when I have done it all, I will have a better idea of what I actually want to do with my budget to “spruce up” the house.

Love this....my goal in the next few weeks is to clear out one of the upstairs closets and transform it into my own sort of decorating closet, where I store stuff I like but am not currently putting out. And then it would be great to have things in one spot, where I can easily go and then just see stuff I stored but then looks fresh months later when I am itching for some changes. Dated or outgrown stuff I will just give to goodwill.

[Anonymous]

I might get flamed for this because it’s “country” but Vermont Store (which bought up some of the old Country Curtains) is a good source for moderately priced curtains that come in all sorts of sizes. I’ve had good luck with them when I needed fresh curtains in a room, because they are way cheaper than custom or even pottery barn but have more size options than a target or ikea. They have simply choices like a simple cotton duck or muslin, as well as some more “country” choices like plaid. New clean curtains can really bring a place up. Or alternatively wash yours (or have them cleaned) or ditch them and get new blinds for a crisp look—the fake wooden white ones are a clean look and not too expensive. Many of the blinds companies will have pre-thanksgiving sales.

Also totally agree new pillows in a cheerful color or pattern can totally lift the room. I got some in a coral color for our grey couch and it totally made me like the room a lot more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know how you feel, OP. My house is starting to feel stale and shabby.

I think it’s because we’ve all spent so much time in our houses over the past 18 months or so. So many things are getting worn out with heavy use, too. My sofa developed a rip that can’t be repaired, and I just haven’t gotten around to replacing it.

At least I’m not having much company so I don’t have to worry about people seeing it.

This is OP - and yes, it's the shabbiness! Everything suddenly looks so shabby! Like it's dirty and can't get clean. One of my husband's old coworkers stopped by last week while he was in our area and he was in this really dapper suit, and I was suddenly just so aware of how shabby and random all our stuff looked. Like I was saying to my husband yesterday, I feel like it all looks like we picked it up off the street - and not in a good way!

This last line made me laugh. Thanks, OP

(I have a couple of things that I love that I picked up from my neighbors' curb.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I might get flamed for this because it’s “country” but Vermont Store (which bought up some of the old Country Curtains) is a good source for moderately priced curtains that come in all sorts of sizes. I’ve had good luck with them when I needed fresh curtains in a room, because they are way cheaper than custom or even pottery barn but have more size options than a target or ikea. They have simply choices like a simple cotton duck or muslin, as well as some more “country” choices like plaid. New clean curtains can really bring a place up. Or alternatively wash yours (or have them cleaned) or ditch them and get new blinds for a crisp look—the fake wooden white ones are a clean look and not too expensive. Many of the blinds companies will have pre-thanksgiving sales.

Also totally agree new pillows in a cheerful color or pattern can totally lift the room. I got some in a coral color for our grey couch and it totally made me like the room a lot more.

No flaming here, I love the Vermont store (I rarely buy there but the catalogs are fun). J c Penney also has surprisingly good curtains as does ebay. And ikea.

[Anonymous]

*Vermont country store

[Anonymous]

When I felt this way, it really helped to add a small gallery wall, personal framed photos on a bookshelf, a throw blanket and pillows, a lamp with warm light, and plants. But our problem was the room felt stiff and these things made it feel cozier and lived in.

Maybe think about what your space is lacking (color vs. neutrals, structure vs. coziness, etc.) and see what small things will add that contrast.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love design but I can't keep remodeling every 5 minutes. So, I create albums for each of my rooms on my iphone. Then I take pictures of all the things I have that I actually like, put them in the various albums, and I just kind of futz with them, adding screenshots of things I find online that I like as I go. (I know, it's like Pinterest, but it's easier for me.)

Anyway, in the end I will have each room planned out with things I have and things I want. But a lot of the time, this exercise simply keeps me from actual shopping. I will get bored with the perfect image on my phone and just feel fine with what I already have.

But if you take a photo of something you have, and it's just fug everywhere, then I would say get rid of it. And if everything looks bad, and nothing goes together, it might actually be time to remodel.

Wow this is fantastic advice.