What would you do? My good kid pays the price.

[Anonymous]

I am unhappy right now that my daughter is seated next to a boy she that she is good for, but that is bad for her. The teacher has told her she is good for him and therefore will continue to keep them seated together, but when DD doesn't get her in class work done or does badly on a test, she says he distracted her. Plus, we have at least two hard to control kids in each of our 2nd grade classrooms (all are out of bounds transfers). I saw the post on the GT and I am wondering if it might provide a better learning environment than this craziness in our "good" MCPS elementary that is being made a less than optimum environment because no transfer is ever turned down.

[Anonymous]

Dear Teacher, Sally has complained to me that Jason distracts her and makes it difficult for her to complete her work. Please move her seat. Thanks, Sally's mom. Copy to: principal.

Done.

Although I had much more sympathy for you until you mentioned those troublemakers are out-of-boundary transfers. How do you know this, and why does it matter? Evidence that your neighborhood only produces angels and the only bad kids are from those "other" places?

[Anonymous]

Not OP, but if Sally says the troublemakers are Billy and Jane and mother looks up Billy's and Jane's addresses in the student directory, it's easy to tell.

No one should think that their school only produces students who behave 100% perfectly 100% of the time. Our school has many children who are COSA and some of them are MUCH preferred over the "home school" kids.

[Anonymous]

18:41 here--true that OP could look up those specific kids, but still have a bad taste about "no transfer is ever turned down" meaning their "good" elementary school is being tainted by out-of-boundary kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dear Teacher, Sally has complained to me that Jason distracts her and makes it difficult for her to complete her work. Please move her seat. Thanks, Sally's mom. Copy to: principal.

Done.

Although I had much more sympathy for you until you mentioned those troublemakers are out-of-boundary transfers. How do you know this, and why does it matter? Evidence that your neighborhood only produces angels and the only bad kids are from those "other" places?

Exactly. The type that demands diversity but would freak out if a black man walked down her street.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am unhappy right now that my daughter is seated next to a boy she that she is good for, but that is bad for her. The teacher has told her she is good for him and therefore will continue to keep them seated together, but when DD doesn't get her in class work done or does badly on a test, she says he distracted her. Plus, we have at least two hard to control kids in each of our 2nd grade classrooms (all are out of bounds transfers). I saw the post on the GT and I am wondering if it might provide a better learning environment than this craziness in our "good" MCPS elementary that is being made a less than optimum environment because no transfer is ever turned down.

Wrong. In the GT program (4th and 5th), there are all kinds of smart kids including those with issues. There are a lot of kids who are disruptive during the class. "Good behavior" is not a factor for being accepted in the program.

[Anonymous]

DD is in the HGC program. I second the previous poster. There are one or two disruptive kids in the group. All kids have issues, gifted or not and sometimes even more so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am unhappy right now that my daughter is seated next to a boy she that she is good for, but that is bad for her. The teacher has told her she is good for him and therefore will continue to keep them seated together, but when DD doesn't get her in class work done or does badly on a test, she says he distracted her. Plus, we have at least two hard to control kids in each of our 2nd grade classrooms (all are out of bounds transfers). I saw the post on the GT and I am wondering if it might provide a better learning environment than this craziness in our "good" MCPS elementary that is being made a less than optimum environment because no transfer is ever turned down.

This was my DD in ES. She is NOT the teacher's assistant, or the SN assistant. There was nothing I could do to get her out of that role, which was very damaging to her, and discriminatory as well. None of the PTA mom's daughters were required to babysit for the SN/EMO kids. She was 8-9 years old (4th grade). She is there to get an education. It was a deciding factor in moving to a private school -- I wish we had done it sooner. Your DD is NOT the teachers assistant, and no amount of "shaming" to get her to do it by the teacher calling her names will change that. I hope you are successful, and good luck.

[Anonymous]

Sounds tough OP. Agree with the PP that your daughter is there to learn, not to assist the teacher.

[Anonymous]

Have you considered that your daughter needs to be held accountable for her own actions? If she does poorly on the test, could it be that she didn't fully understand the material? Why must it always be someone else's fault?

Tell her to ignore the boy.

Last year, my child was seated near another child who was quite distracting. I told my DC simply "ignore that kid. Don't get distracted. It's his business, not yours."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you considered that your daughter needs to be held accountable for her own actions? If she does poorly on the test, could it be that she didn't fully understand the material? Why must it always be someone else's fault?

Tell her to ignore the boy.

Last year, my child was seated near another child who was quite distracting. I told my DC simply "ignore that kid. Don't get distracted. It's his business, not yours."

I agree to some extent.
But, the bottom line the girl is 8 and still learning self-control.
It is hard when someone is being distracting.
If you have to stop concentrating on what you are doing to tell someone else "STOP" -- that takes time away from what you are doing.
Having said that...my daughter had a disruptive kid in 1st grade last year.
I emphasized to my daughter that laughing at, encouraging, or in some other way participating in the kid's disruptive behaviour was unfair to the disruptive kid as well....basically it was giving him a payoff for his behaviour.
He needed a better example and my daughter could be that...
Plus teacher had sense enough to separate them. - WHICH IS WHAT SHE SHOULD HAVE DONE!
Email the teacher and copy the principal...I did that in regards to what I deemed a mean teacher -- problem solved with a quickness.

[Anonymous]

Maybe your daughter needs to concentrate better.

[Anonymous]

I think teachers should switch seats every quarter. It has a lot of benefits and is a solvable solution for everyone.

[Anonymous]

I rotate my 1st graders every month or so, and switching seats around periodically is standard practice in elementary school. I find it hard to believe that this teacher insists on keeping OP's daughter sewed to this boy for the rest of the year.

[Anonymous]

Sad the teacher is trying to have the good students do her job.
Maybe your daughter could pull a couple pranks of her own so she is not the teacher #2. Maybe rotate some desks around, leave noisy stuff out, plant candy, instigate some fun, etc.