Marital red state/blue state divide
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Anonymous
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I am plagued by the divisiveness in my own home. DH has evolved into a "Prepper".
I don't think there is a shred of logic to this, and it feels like it is starting to shred the family fabric (not unlike the politicization we experience nationally). Any advice on how to work collaboratively. I am so bummed! What's the best M.O.? I am sure I am not alone. BTW, I grew up overseas and was evacuated on more than one occasion, so I feel like I have seen the real thing (blackouts, then separated from the home (including pets and everything you own) for weeks; once there was nothing to return to; once it was fine to return). I have no squabble with the recently purchased guns (not a fan, but not squabbling). But I really don't get it and I am finding it increasingly difficult to deal with. We've been married going on 18 years, and this guy is looking like a stranger! We started as a couple with common views on fiscal conservativeness, social liberalness, and a difference of opinion on social safety net. I'm looking to moderate GOP-ers for advice here. |
Anonymous
| OP, how old is your DH? I ask because this sounds like some irrational fear. Could its basis be in middle aged depression? |
Anonymous
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He's 51; I'm 50.
He's had middle age blues at times as our knees gave way at 45 and skiing at 51 is harder than when we were 35. But the irrational part is accurate (or so it feels). But he is not the only one. And the divide within the GOP is palpable. He went right-er instead of middl-er. |
Anonymous
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Not to get arm-chair shrink on you OP, but I do think this is some sort of a middle-age crisis. I have seen many, many men your DH's age who are hit with the realization that they are older, their bodies are failing, they haven't accomplished what they want to in life, it's all downhill from here, etc, who succumb to the "old white guy" syndrome, the classic stereotype of the right wing GOP. They realize the world is no longer as they once knew it and they are no longer "in control," so to speak, so they react like this, to give them a feeling of control and power. I don't think it's that unusual, although your DH sounds a little extreme.
In other words, I think there is something more going on here than just a political reaction/ statement. That may be how it's manifesting itself, but I think your DH is either depressed or suffering from middle age angst. |
Anonymous
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Sorry to be ignorant, but do you mean he is prepping for the possibility of a Hurricane Sandy-type situation, or the complete meltdown of all governmental authority?
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Anonymous
I'm assuming it's this: http://channel.nationalgeographic.com/channel/doomsday-preppers/ It's a fad that aligns with many societal trends including the fact that baby boomers are getting old. |
Anonymous
This man is noticing the dramatic changes happening in American and the destruction of the laws of this land per the Constitution. I've been appalled lately too. I think DH is simply being observant. |
Anonymous
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That's America, not American. UGH! Must be perim-menopause - HA!
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Anonymous
This view is scary to me. If my DH went down this path philosophically I don't know how I'd handle it, OP. |
Anonymous
The country is going down the tubes. White men in their 50s are despised by corporate America and the rest of the ruling elite. He is Michael Douglas in Falling Down. |
Anonymous
The truth is indeed scary. |
Anonymous
He's right. I just image-google the term 'board of directors' and the results only included 75% white men. WAY down from the good old days. Virtually extinct. https://www.google.com/search?q=board+of+directors&hl=en&safe=off&tbo=d&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=EKciUYTzLsuy0QGXi4GQDQ&ved=0CAoQ_AUoAQ&biw=781&bih=590 |
Anonymous
It's not the truth, but rather extremism of all sorts, that I find scary. I don't believe the world is quite the dangerous place that you do. |
Anonymous
| I'm uber liberal and in my 20s and I find emergency preparation and self-reliance just fascinating. I totally fantasize about having a secret bunker and running the house on solar panels and having chickens and a major veggie garden and being totally off the grid. I guess I'm just missing the whole philosophical "the gubmint is coming for us!" attitude. Those zombies won't get me! WHOO SUPPLIES! Yeah, it's weird. |
Anonymous
You see dangerous as guns. I see dangerous as a President who doesn't respect the laws of the land and seems hell-bent on turning our sovereignty over to the UN. Tomato/tomahto |