My 8 yo has stopped eating dinner. Is it too young for an eating disorder?

[Anonymous]

I need some help.

For the last week or so, my beautiful 8 yo dd has started to not eat dinner. At first we just figured she wasn't hungry, or had too much of a snack, or not feeling well, but now it's like the 8th or 9th night in a row. And I'm getting concerned.

She's the younger sister. And her mother, unfortunately, diets (despite my pleas to talk about it). And, she's always been a little more interested in superficial and "girly" things than her older sister. I have, indeed, heard more than two or three isolated comments about fat and weight, enough to know that hurling an allegation that "you're fat" is an insult, and have tried to address it head on, but I'm afraid she may be absorbing some other messages elswhere (TV? Friends at school? Not sure...). But, you know, I'm only a dad, so I'm not sure how much counterbalance I can have.

This is like my worst nightmare, so I want to be sure that I'm not jumping to conclusions here. But would you be concerned if you're kid was refusing dinner night after night? Time to take her to a doctor?

A cursory review (read: I Googled it) did hit on some articles about how this is becoming more common in girls under 10, so I don't need those links. Just wonder if anyone has BTDT, whether this is a watch a bit a longer moment, should I relax moment, or is it time to intervene moment. Help, please.

[Anonymous]

Sorry to be clear, I plead with the mother to NOT talk about dieting in earshot of the kids.

[Anonymous]

Have you asked her why when she doesn't eat? Is it always the same reason? Different reasons?

[Anonymous]

Yes, I'm curious as to why she's saying she's not eating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you asked her why when she doesn't eat? Is it always the same reason? Different reasons?

Yes, I'm curious about this too... I think this matters a lot to your story.

[Anonymous]

I'd talk to your DD about it to see if there's a reason behind it. 8 or 9 days is a long time with no dinner but maybe she's just upset about something that is happening at school, or maybe she's fighting a virus or something?

Around 8 or 9 is when kids start becoming more aware and self conscious about themselves so maybe it's something along those lines. As sad as it is, it's not too early for an eating disorder to start, so if it continues I'd consider talking to your pediatrician or someone

[Anonymous]

I stopped eating in the evenings for weeks around age ten. My parents flipped out and immediately took me to a doctor who listened to my symptoms and realized I was suffering from an ulcer. I didn't know how to describe the acid feeling and the uncomfortable ness and I simply just told ppl I didn't want to eat. I ate during the day just find but by evening my ulcer was acting up and I couldn't stomach the thought of food. So although I was feeling the stress of adolescence I wasn't forming an eating disorder like suspected. I share this story to point out it could be any number of issues. Good luck OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I stopped eating in the evenings for weeks around age ten. My parents flipped out and immediately took me to a doctor who listened to my symptoms and realized I was suffering from an ulcer. I didn't know how to describe the acid feeling and the uncomfortable ness and I simply just told ppl I didn't want to eat. I ate during the day just find but by evening my ulcer was acting up and I couldn't stomach the thought of food. So although I was feeling the stress of adolescence I wasn't forming an eating disorder like suspected. I share this story to point out it could be any number of issues. Good luck OP!

PP here. That's a good thought too I didn't think of that.

I had developed an ulcer and gastritis (irritation/overabundance of acid of stomach acid) in high school, and I was miserable. Every time I ate I felt like someone had lit my stomach on fire. Might be a good idea to check for those types of things too, an 8 year old might not know how to verbalize/explain it.

[Anonymous]

She might also have acid reflux - my daughter did and it was making her uncomfortable. We saw Dr Pluta out in Rockville; she treated her for a year or so and now we are off meds.

[Anonymous]

Post your question on the forum: www.aroundthedinnertable.com

There are other parents of kids who are 7-9 on this forum. The kids DO have eating disorders, but maybe those patents can help you decide if your situation warrants further intervention.

You are a great Dad.

[Anonymous]

Pp here. The website above might be .org.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you asked her why when she doesn't eat? Is it always the same reason? Different reasons?

Mostly "I'm not hungry" and refusal to talk about anything else.

[Anonymous]

What does she eat at other times?

I don't think it's unusual for kids not to eat much dinner -- my DD does this sometimes. Often, it's because she at a substantial snack after school and just isn't hungry. Could that be the case with your DD?

Can you estimate her total food intake? If it's normal, I wouldn't worry about it.

[Anonymous]

I am assuming that you and her mother are not together - sorry if this isn't the case. Have you talked to her mom about it to see if she has any thoughts on what's going on? If your daughter is between 2 houses, are her eating habits the same in both?

[Anonymous]

I think you should call the doctor and discuss it. if there is some way to check and see if she is eating her lunch at school, that would be a good idea,as well.