Please HELP-Unemployed Spouse, is Bankr. the only option?

[Anonymous]

Hello,

I've read a few of the threads on here and everyone seems really supportive so I'm hoping that you kind strangers will give me some advice. My partner was laid off late spring of last year, just as I was delivering our baby (literally, I found out in the hospital). He had been in the position for 8 years, with the company 10. Well, now that the savings is drying up and I am in a total panic. I am back at work but since I was forced to take some unpaid leave while pregnant, we are really in a mess. It just seemed like the perfect storm of problems. I get no sleep as I'm either up at night nursing my baby or stressing about our money situation, literally!. We have a lot of debt that we were slowly taking care of. I'm hoping to get some practical advice on how to proceed. I've always paid all of my bills on time and pay more than the minimum on cc bills so the fact that I can't do that now is freaking me out. I know my credit, that I worked so hard for, is shot.

For bills we have:
Mortgage
2 cars/insurance
cable/phone
cc debt
student loans
gas/water/pepco
1 private loan

After reading this board I've negotiated a lower cell phone rate, frozen our student loan payments, and we are serioulsy discussing selling a car. Oh, I'm negotiating an early termination with cable as well. The biggest issue now is the cc debt. It is all mine and there is literally not enough money to pay all of that (about 500/month) and pay both car loans etc. So, what do I do? I've been able to juggle everything till now but no longer can. Yes, before you say it, I know it is terrible that I have so much cc debt, which is why I was working so hard to get rid of it and I feel terrible for it. I didn't cancel the cards because I always paid more than the minimum and some months I've had to charge groceries etc. But now that I see that I can't pay everything, I'm not sure what to do. The thought of missing a payment is making me sick but if it comes between paying a cc bill and feeding my kids...

Any other suggestions? Lastly, yes, I'm seriously wondering if bankruptcy would help in that it would free up the cash that I currently pay on cc for us to live. I have no idea. Add to that, two toddlers and an infant that must be fed and taken care of....ahhhh, this is why I'm going crazy! I NEVER thought we would be in this position. We are both professionals and have worked hard to make a good name in our respective fields. I guess the other issue of supporting a spouse through something like this, while also trying not to freak out, is a question for the couples board? He has literally sent out hundres and hundreds of resumes and at this point, even places like Target aren't calling him. I know he feels terrible, as do I, this just sucks. Anyone been through this and made it out on the other side, sane?
t

[Anonymous]

I can't give a substantive answer but hope others can point you to a bankruptcy attorney who can give you a free or reduced rate/reasonable consultation.

IMO you really need advice tailored to your specific situation/ facts, in more detail than you could lay them out here.

Good luck, I'm sorry and hope things improve.

[Anonymous]

A few things- he might need to "dumb down" his resume for the jobs like Target where he is just trying to get some cash to get by.

There is an in between - you can call your cc and explain to them your situation and let them know that you can't possibly pay the whole thing. They should reduce your bill. This will damage your credit, but it will work.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry you are going through this. Is one of you working now? Has DH thought of a career change?

[Anonymous]

Of course you should sell a car, maybe sell both and get a less expensive one depending on what you have and what your loan is. That should also bring down your insurance.

You may want to consider selling the house and moving to a smaller/cheaper place if that's an option and you aren't underwater on your mortgage.

And if the baby was born last spring it must be 10 months old at this point so you need to work on getting it to sleep through the night - you don't need to be up nursing in the middle of the night which seems to be adding signficantly to your stress levels.

[Anonymous]

Sell one of the cars. Try refinancing the other. I would look at pfcu.

Call the credit cards and car loan comanes and see if you can arrange to ski a payment, without hurting our credit. They will often add a payment to the back end.

Dh can definitely get som cash working part time with a mortgage broker. It won be lot of money, bother are swamped, so he get hours that will enable him still to look for work and ringin some money.

[Anonymous]

Can I ask his field / industry? I'm willing to look at jobs at my company for you.

[Anonymous]

So, is your partner the current childcare for your children as a SAHD? If not, what is your childcare situation? i.e. can he just take any job to make some money to help pay credit card bills or does he need to be able to make enough to cover childcare before any goes to paying off debt?

[Anonymous]

seems obvious, but just want to check -- your husband is getting unemployment, yes? It's not a lot but it can help. When my husband is out of work it kept being extended and was a huge help. (about $360 a week).