Are all 5-year-olds annoying as hell?

[Anonymous]

We're on vacation with some old friends and their kids. Their only child is 5. Our kids are 3 and 2, and believe me they can be plenty annoying in their own way, but this 5-year-old is driving me crazy. He is not a bad kid and his parents are not inattentive. They are not always consistent with discipline but they're pretty good -- as good as most parents I know. I want to love this child and I know he means well but I'm having a tough time. He is just so annoying. He constantly interrupts adult conversations and then just talks and talks and talks without taking a breath until you finally cut him off after like 5 minutes, then he gets mad and whiny. If I compliment my child in any way, he has to one-up him. E.g. if I say "That's a nice picture" to my DS, this child will say, "But my picture is NICER, right?" And of course it is because he is older, but it's just mean to say. And yes I do compliment this other child probably MORE than I compliment my own child, but I do occasionally compliment my own child. If I sit down to read a book with one of mine, this other child MUST be included and then loudly talk through the entire thing. He is also a huge tattletale, and he seems to feel competitive even with much younger children.

Is this just the age? Is it an only child thing? Are my kids going to be like this? Do you think the parents realize how annoying he is?

[Anonymous]

No, 5 year olds are generally wonderful, with the exception of the tattling.

Either it is just this kid, or just you, or a combination of the two.

[Anonymous]

The interrupting thing is something that his parents should have cut off long ago. My 3 year old does it all the time (says "Let's talk one at a time!" and then cuts off the adult talking to talk). We constantly correct him and tell him that he needs to wait his turn. He has been doing it less, although it has not stopped.

[Anonymous]

My child is 5 and an only child. For my child, it's a combination of his age and being an only child. He is used to the attention on him all the time and 5 year olds talk a lot. They are sponges and soak up information.

[Anonymous]

I recall 5 years old as an actually really awesome age. You say his parents are not inattentive, but where are they when he is constantly jumping in your face while you are reading to your child or talking to your child about child's picture? It can be draining to be consistent with discipline, but correcting 50% of the time is essentially no better than correcting 0% of the time. 5 year olds are very verbal, and I remember having to teach my kids not to interrupt conversations and wait their turn. This lesson had to be reinforced many, many times, but it did sink in. I would not allow my child to interrupt the conversation, but would then happily "give them the floor" as a reward for waiting their turn to speak.
OP your kids are at a crucial stage. See this glimpse into the future as a cautionary tale. This is what awaits you if you are not consistent with your children as to expectation for appropriate behavior. Nip it in the bud now, and I think you will really enjoy your kids when they are 5!

[Anonymous]

This particular 5 yr old sounds very insecure. If he asked "but MY picture is better, right?" I would physically touch his arm or head and say, "It's not a contest." If he interrupted when I began reading to my (quiet) children, the very first time I would put a hand on him, look him in the eyes, and say, "You're welcome to listen, but if you're going to talk I'm going to have to ask you to leave the room. This is a reading time, not a talking time." Then if he spoke again, I'd close the book, stand up, and calmly lead him to the door and say "I told you this was a quiet time. Since you want to talk, why don't you go find your mom/Larla and talk with them since you can't stay here now that you talked."

[Anonymous]

Yeah, I think it's probably more that he's an only child and not used to sharing time with adults than his age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, 5 year olds are generally wonderful, with the exception of the tattling.

Either it is just this kid, or just you, or a combination of the two.

This. My five yr old is in kindergarten and I volunteer in the classroom. Kids are wonderful and fun!

The tattling and interrupting should be nipped. I'm sure his classmates find it just as annoying.

[Anonymous]

I teach kindergarten--the tattling and interrupting is typical, but otherwise he seems like an only child who is not used to sharing the attention. Tattling and interrupting are two areas we are constantly "working on" with pretty much all the students in my classroom. The students who do it the most often tend to be kids who had minimal preschool/day care (read: are used to being at home with a parent and getting all the attention to themselves and/or being the leader or boss amongst any younger siblings.)

But all in all, five years old is a great age--you have much to look forward to! Still content to be read to, always learning, still excited about everyday things, plenty of innocence, yet old enough to make jokes, be creative, evaluate decisions, etc. I love 'em!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This particular 5 yr old sounds very insecure. If he asked "but MY picture is better, right?" I would physically touch his arm or head and say, "It's not a contest." If he interrupted when I began reading to my (quiet) children, the very first time I would put a hand on him, look him in the eyes, and say, "You're welcome to listen, but if you're going to talk I'm going to have to ask you to leave the room. This is a reading time, not a talking time." Then if he spoke again, I'd close the book, stand up, and calmly lead him to the door and say "I told you this was a quiet time. Since you want to talk, why don't you go find your mom/Larla and talk with them since you can't stay here now that you talked."

+1!!

[Anonymous]

What is tattling?

[Anonymous]

This does not sound like my 5yo at all. He has his moments, but in general, he's a doll.

[Anonymous]

When we reached 5, I realized why people become parents. It made the agony of the toddler/preschool years worthwhile.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This does not sound like my 5yo at all. He has his moments, but in general, he's a doll.

Every child can't be perfect like yours.

[Anonymous]

His parents, since they don't have any other kids, probably aren't used to how he responds to being in a situation where there are other kids.

I happen to find many children annoying- my own included. But if things he does bother you, you can speak up to him personally. Like when my 10 year old nephew says stuff about the littler kids, I wouldn't hesitate to say, "You know, these guys are little, so their drawings are pretty nice for being only 2 and 3 years old, don't you think? And you don't want them to think that you don't think they're doing a good job."

And as for this interrupting thing should have been nipped in the bud- good freaking luck with that. I'm a high school teacher. At a *good* school. Do you know how many times daily my supposedly well-bred students interrupt me while I'm talking to another adult? I feel like I'm talking to my three year old: "X, do you see that I'm talking to another teacher right now? Please have a seat and talk to me when I'm finished." I'm talking 3x daily from 16 year olds.