Is a wedding at a 'plantation' bad form? or romantic?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People in the South love to romanticize the past, they think it was a better time. For some people it wasn't. To tear down old buildings like they hold the guilt of slavery is useless, we can't deny the past like that.

There’s a lot of room between not feeling like holding our wedding on a plantation and wanting to tear the plantation down. I think they should exist as museums for teaching about slavery and Reconstruction. No one has weddings at the sites of Nazi death camps.

Nazi death camps =/= antebellum plantations

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People in the South love to romanticize the past, they think it was a better time. For some people it wasn't. To tear down old buildings like they hold the guilt of slavery is useless, we can't deny the past like that.

There’s a lot of room between not feeling like holding our wedding on a plantation and wanting to tear the plantation down. I think they should exist as museums for teaching about slavery and Reconstruction. No one has weddings at the sites of Nazi death camps.

Nazi death camps =/= antebellum plantations

Fine, no one holds weddings at Nazi labor camps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People in the South love to romanticize the past, they think it was a better time. For some people it wasn't. To tear down old buildings like they hold the guilt of slavery is useless, we can't deny the past like that.

People everywhere romanticize the past.

AAs think that old life in Africa was wonderful until the white man came...they don't seem to realize their ancestors led primitive lives and it was a fellow African tribe who captured them and enslaved them and sold them to Arab traders who in turn sold them to the white man.

Yes, history is a b*tch, but it's who we are.

[Anonymous]

We received a wedding invitation, it's going to be at a plantation. Should you not go because of the location?

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't decline as a way of virtue signaling. But, I would silently acknowledge the property's sacredness, say a prayer and think about those that suffered. I would offer a donation while there.

I would not have my wedding at a plantation out of respect for my black friends and their ancestors. Didn't read entire thread, I'm sure it's heated. If OP has plans to book a plantation, my recommendation would be to forgo wedding gifts and ask that a donation be made to the historical organization that manages the site. It is probably used for educational purposes. If you decide against this, make a donation yourselves.

[Anonymous]

A significant portion of New York City was built by slaves. Are you going to refuse to attend a wedding there?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I live in Charleston where we obviously have lots of plantations and weddings at these venues happen daily.

The thing is, so do other events. They are where oyster festivals happen, where you take the kids to the pumpkin patch or for hayrides, where there are concerts and Spartan races and color runs, and forth.

In a way I think it's kind of nice that places with awful histories have been transformed into important parts of the community and local culture. But at the same time, these things are all expensive and we're an area that's horribly racially segregated as a consequence of being socioeconomically segregated. There's some conversation to be had about how while the plantations have taken on a "new" role, it's mainly the privileged Whites who attend things at them. I feel conflicted.

“We’re not racist any more we’re just socioeconomically segregated” is...quite a take.

That's not at all what pp said, and you're not doing your cause any favors by twisting pa's words. It's interactions like this that make people think there's no point in trying to have a discussion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't decline as a way of virtue signaling. But, I would silently acknowledge the property's sacredness, say a prayer and think about those that suffered. I would offer a donation while there.

I would not have my wedding at a plantation out of respect for my black friends and their ancestors. Didn't read entire thread, I'm sure it's heated. If OP has plans to book a plantation, my recommendation would be to forgo wedding gifts and ask that a donation be made to the historical organization that manages the site. It is probably used for educational purposes. If you decide against this, make a donation yourselves.

A donation is not helpful. Renting the space for parties and profiting from the romanticized history
Is profiteering on slavery all over again.

[Anonymous]

I would never do it but, sure OP, go on 'head and strum up the banjo and get that weddin' goin'!

[Anonymous]

Obviously many people don't have a problem with events in plantations or they wouldn't exist.

[Anonymous]

Should you avoid sending your children to these schools?

"Profits from slavery and related industries helped fund some of the most prestigious schools in the Northeast, including Harvard, Columbia, Princeton and Yale. And in many southern states — including the University of Virginia — enslaved people built college campuses and served faculty and students."

https://www.apmreports.org/story/2017/09/04/shackled-legacy

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]People in the South love to romanticize the past, they think it was a better time. For some people it wasn't. To tear down old buildings like they hold the guilt of slavery is useless, we can't deny the past like that. [/quote]

People everywhere romanticize the past.

AAs think that old life in Africa was wonderful until the white man came...they don't seem to realize their ancestors led primitive lives and it was a fellow African tribe who captured them and enslaved them and sold them to Arab traders who in turn sold them to the white man.

Yes, history is a b*tch, but it's who we are.
[/quote]

Nope AA dont romanticize the past. Most know nothing of our past unfortunately our history was stolen from us and most of it rewrittem to suite white societys taste.

But I think having a plantation wedding is in very poor taste personally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
DP. Not analogous. In all your examples, the negative events were purely happenstance. In the case of plantations, their express purpose was forcing human beings to toil as slaves for the enrichment of the plantation owners.

Which, at the time, was perfectly legal, and had been for centuries...

What does legality have to do with it? It's a huge, immoral stain on our country's history, and I wouldn't want to give the appearance of celebrating that "bygone era." People that do make themselves look either clueless or racist.

At the time, slavery was considered neither illegal nor immoral. The claim that "it's a huge, immoral stain on our country's history," is entirely retroactive. You are projecting today's values back on past centuries where they have no relevance or application. The idea that we, today, should feel guilty for things we did not do, and for which the actual perpetrators neither did nor should (remember: neither illegal nor immoral) feel any guilt, is absurd and insane. Get over it.] [/b]My Mom who is not black was not allowed in white stores in Texas because of Jim Crow. My husband’s family Holocaust survivors, I guess his grandmother should get over it. [Interesting you should mention that. My grandparents are Holocaust survivors. Do I think that any German born after 1945 has any guilt or owes me anything? NO, NO, NO. They wouldn't even owe my grandparents anything if they were still alive.]

Must be nice to not be affected by racism. Talk about white privileged. [You know who else is privileged? Blacks who live in America today instead of in Africa.]
A) you still benefit from it [No, I do not benefit from white privilege. Eff off. My family are all dirt-poor peasants. My parents were the first ones to go to college. Great grandparents were getting their butts kicked by Cossacks in the Russian Empire. ] and B)you trot out the same ridiculous contextual morality every time somebody mentions something that God knows and anybody else knows Is wrong, WAS wrong, WILL ALWAYS be wrong. [You need to read some books. Slavery was not considered "wrong" before the early 1800s. It existed in every culture for thousands of years.]
You need Jesus, a conscience, and a better group of friends than those fools you hang around with on Stormfront , not necessarily in that order. [Jesus didn't say a word against slavery. My conscience is totally clean of any guilt -- again, I did not own slaves, and bear ZERO responsibility for the acts of long-dead people. I don't think I'd be welcome on Stormfront, given my subhuman ancestry. I'm not the least bit interested in your efforts to guilt trip me, especially because such efforts are always the precursor of a money grab.]

omg..you have never been to any African country, obviously.

[Anonymous]

It doesn’t make slavery okay but a lot of slaves were treated well. And as horrible as we see it today, it was more just a fact of life and part of the economy back then. Some of those old plantation homes are beautiful and capture a brief era of American history. I think it’s important to preserve all parts of our history so that we can learn from it. Serving as a venue is how many of these places are able to remain preserved and open.

[Anonymous]

Oh look it’s wedding season! So I guess DCUM has RSVP’d
To the plantation wedding thread!