MIL trying to send MY Jewish kids to Bible camp!

[Anonymous]

Hey OP if you simply keep the kids at home all of the time and don't let anyone in and don't give them access to TV/internet they won't find out that there are other religions and lifestyles. They won't be exposed or influenced. It's perfect! Hire some security or maybe build a moat around your house to keep the non-Jewish elements far far away. You have to be committed to this!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hey OP if you simply keep the kids at home all of the time and don't let anyone in and don't give them access to TV/internet they won't find out that there are other religions and lifestyles. They won't be exposed or influenced. It's perfect! Hire some security or maybe build a moat around your house to keep the non-Jewish elements far far away. You have to be committed to this!

Good idea.

Now what to do with the actual issue - the meddling MIL?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey OP if you simply keep the kids at home all of the time and don't let anyone in and don't give them access to TV/internet they won't find out that there are other religions and lifestyles. They won't be exposed or influenced. It's perfect! Hire some security or maybe build a moat around your house to keep the non-Jewish elements far far away. You have to be committed to this!

Good idea.

Now what to do with the actual issue - the meddling MIL?

This to me, is the real issue. MIL went way over the line.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey OP if you simply keep the kids at home all of the time and don't let anyone in and don't give them access to TV/internet they won't find out that there are other religions and lifestyles. They won't be exposed or influenced. It's perfect! Hire some security or maybe build a moat around your house to keep the non-Jewish elements far far away. You have to be committed to this!

Good idea.

Now what to do with the actual issue - the meddling MIL?

This to me, is the real issue. MIL went way over the line.

You can keep MIL off the island!
But seriously why not cut the MIL some slack? You don't even know much about the VBS program. Perhaps MIL is more respectful than you think and chose a welcoming VBS - the one at my church for example is more of a community event and definitely not evangelical. It's more like a party. For little kids, the focus is on FUN not praying. Is the MIL really trying to contaminate the Jewish children or is she trying to plan a fun week for them so the OP and her DH can take a week long vacation without worrying about childcare?! This is NOT meddling. Come on. As other pp's have said, this is a very nice gift. Maybe let the grandparents just do their thing and you do yours OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey OP if you simply keep the kids at home all of the time and don't let anyone in and don't give them access to TV/internet they won't find out that there are other religions and lifestyles. They won't be exposed or influenced. It's perfect! Hire some security or maybe build a moat around your house to keep the non-Jewish elements far far away. You have to be committed to this!

Good idea.

Now what to do with the actual issue - the meddling MIL?

This to me, is the real issue. MIL went way over the line.

You can keep MIL off the island!
But seriously why not cut the MIL some slack? You don't even know much about the VBS program. Perhaps MIL is more respectful than you think and chose a welcoming VBS - the one at my church for example is more of a community event and definitely not evangelical. It's more like a party. For little kids, the focus is on FUN not praying. Is the MIL really trying to contaminate the Jewish children or is she trying to plan a fun week for them so the OP and her DH can take a week long vacation without worrying about childcare?! This is NOT meddling. Come on. As other pp's have said, this is a very nice gift. Maybe let the grandparents just do their thing and you do yours OP.

No. OP decides what is in the best interest of her children. MIL is in the wrong. Period. No vacation bible school for Jewish children. You don't have to like it.

[Anonymous]

Well I'd rather have the week long vacation with DH while kiddos stay with grandparents but what do i know - I might be more selfish than Jewish.

[Anonymous]

100% on team op. It's not a decision that anyone but parents get to make. Whether Bible school is OK is a personal decision. Internet strangers and MILs don't get a say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

How did you explain this to your children? I think canceling your trip altogether was the nuclear option. You probably should have tried talking it out first instead, but I sense your real wish is to cut the inlaws out of your life completely, right? Please remember that there are very few people on this earth that live your kids like their grands. You've treated them as completely expendable, which perhaps in your mind they are.

I agree with the sentiment of this, although I also agree that you should not have sent them to the camp. It's ok to tell grandma that the kids can't go to the camp, but canceling the trip was really the nuclear option, and you jumped right to it. Why? I could see that approach AFTER you discuss your position with her, and she refuses to cancel the camp, but why as the first option?

Agree 110%

I also agree with the poster who thinks OP views the children as primarily hers.

OP is going to be in for a rude awakening in a few years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

How did you explain this to your children? I think canceling your trip altogether was the nuclear option. You probably should have tried talking it out first instead, but I sense your real wish is to cut the inlaws out of your life completely, right? Please remember that there are very few people on this earth that live your kids like their grands. You've treated them as completely expendable, which perhaps in your mind they are.

I agree with the sentiment of this, although I also agree that you should not have sent them to the camp. It's ok to tell grandma that the kids can't go to the camp, but canceling the trip was really the nuclear option, and you jumped right to it. Why? I could see that approach AFTER you discuss your position with her, and she refuses to cancel the camp, but why as the first option?

Agree 110%

I also agree with the poster who thinks OP views the children as primarily hers.

OP is going to be in for a rude awakening in a few years.

How so? It's already pretty clear her MIL is a conniving B.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

How did you explain this to your children? I think canceling your trip altogether was the nuclear option. You probably should have tried talking it out first instead, but I sense your real wish is to cut the inlaws out of your life completely, right? Please remember that there are very few people on this earth that live your kids like their grands. You've treated them as completely expendable, which perhaps in your mind they are.

I agree with the sentiment of this, although I also agree that you should not have sent them to the camp. It's ok to tell grandma that the kids can't go to the camp, but canceling the trip was really the nuclear option, and you jumped right to it. Why? I could see that approach AFTER you discuss your position with her, and she refuses to cancel the camp, but why as the first option?

Agree 110%

I also agree with the poster who thinks OP views the children as primarily hers.

OP is going to be in for a rude awakening in a few years.

How so? It's already pretty clear her MIL is a conniving B.

?????
It's pretty clear the MIL offered to take the kids for a week so the op and her hubs could go on a vacation.

[Anonymous]

Why is everyone, including the OP, jumping straight to the MIL (no mention of the FIL in all of this, I assume he is also involved in watching the children over the week vacation) being a conniving bitch. Maybe they are both just well-meaning, but clueless. It's certainly worth a straight up conversation to find out.

[Anonymous]

Did she really cancel the vacation because of this???
The husband must have been upset. This is nuts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did she really cancel the vacation because of this???
The husband must have been upset. This is nuts.

I'm guessing he was upset since he is raising his children in the Jewish faith and his mom tried to baptize them in a faith he doesn't observe nor has he chosen for his children, then she signed them up for bible school without asking permission even though he and his wife provided a sitter and other activities to give her a break while she babysits for a week. Upset enough to cancel a vacation with his wife's support, because they don't feel like they can trust his mom to care for the children's best interests and respect them as parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is everyone, including the OP, jumping straight to the MIL (no mention of the FIL in all of this, I assume he is also involved in watching the children over the week vacation) being a conniving bitch. Maybe they are both just well-meaning, but clueless. It's certainly worth a straight up conversation to find out.

Have you read any of the thread? It's gets old rehashing this again and again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hey OP if you simply keep the kids at home all of the time and don't let anyone in and don't give them access to TV/internet they won't find out that there are other religions and lifestyles. They won't be exposed or influenced. It's perfect! Hire some security or maybe build a moat around your house to keep the non-Jewish elements far far away. You have to be committed to this!

Good idea.

Now what to do with the actual issue - the meddling MIL?

This to me, is the real issue. MIL went way over the line.

You can keep MIL off the island!
But seriously why not cut the MIL some slack? You don't even know much about the VBS program. Perhaps MIL is more respectful than you think and chose a welcoming VBS - the one at my church for example is more of a community event and definitely not evangelical. It's more like a party. For little kids, the focus is on FUN not praying. Is the MIL really trying to contaminate the Jewish children or is she trying to plan a fun week for them so the OP and her DH can take a week long vacation without worrying about childcare?! This is NOT meddling. Come on. As other pp's have said, this is a very nice gift. Maybe let the grandparents just do their thing and you do yours OP.

MIL doesn't get to sign kids up for ANY camp without parents' permission.