God this is just wrong on every level. If colleges really believed that, they would just reduce sticker price. But they don’t because, at least at top flight schools, they have plenty of rich and qualified kids who do think it is worth the money. |
You make 400K+? |
+1. They have no idea what they are talking about |
So you transferred and did well enough without an NYU education to have a top 2 % household income. OP was talking about being a donut hole family when you can clearly pay if you wanted to (it's fine if you don't), so I don't know how much you can relate to that situation. It's fine to personally not believe that paying that much is worth it, but there are individuals in this country who can and will. It's totally fine to send your kid in-state or to a merit-granting school but I don't know how sympathetic people can be when you are able to pay and still complain. |
The irony is your husband could have gone to Yale for FREE based on the profile you describe. UTEP was therefore not a great choice and perhaps your husband would have been afforded opportunities such that he wouldn’t have to blow $300k on law school. |
Not a great choice how exactly? Her husband wound up at UChicago for law school, which some would say is better than Yale. |
where does it state they make "400k+"? It just says college could cost 360K for one kid. for example, We were making 300K combined when our first was born. One of us became SAHP, so income went to 200K. We started saving for education immediately. So even with the cut in income, we were able to save $10-12k/year. By time oldest was 12,we had enough saved for them at "top tier university". Did same thing for next kid as well. Now Our income increased to ~300K when oldest was 4. So at that point we upped the amount saved per year--that's how we achieved our savings by time they were 12. But we choose to redirect ~$15-30K/year per kid to savings until we had enough saved. We made the choice to save, as we knew they would NOT get any financial aide and didn't want them restricted to colleges that would give enough merit. We knew it would be much easier to save for college than attempt to figure out how to cash flow $75-80K/year. Then we let it grown, adjusted/added if needed and made sure to pull it out to "safer" investments as we approached college. We live in the DC area, so HCOL and even spent 4 years in San Fran, which makes DC look LCOL. But when we got married, we chose to buy a house that could be afforded on one income if needed (at about 2.5x the highest income at that point). We didn't purchase a home worth double that despite the fact we could have easily done that. Instead we learned to live on a bit less in anticipation of wanting a SAHP (despite the fact I made over 6 figures when I took leave and we could have easily afforded a nanny). That choice (among others) allowed us to save for college once kids came along. But mainly it was making the choice to forgo other things in life in order to save. SO while not everyone can do that (if you are truly living paycheck to paycheck, it's hard to save), I'd argue that most people making $200K+ (even in DCUM area) can probably find a way to save enough for a kid to have $50-60K/year and if you are earning that much can afford to take parent loans/cashflow the difference, if attending an 80K school is that important to you. |
Not PP, but back then (assuming 80s/90s) the elite schools did NOT meet financial need like they do now. And the ability to research and figure out what top schools would meet financial need was a bit different without the internet (I mean we researched schools by sending a letter or calling and requesting they send us a booklet/glossy about the school and the programs we were interested in---there were not college counselors at our High Schools, or at least not at my public school). So perhaps his single mom was not aware of the opportunities or how to find them---it was a very very different time than we currently live in. Maybe he got a good financial aid package, but it wasn't enough considering the costs of transportation, etc. and mom needed him home for breaks if possible (most poor kids back then stayed at school except for xmas break when the dorms closed if they were not within driving distance from home because we couldn't afford to fly home---that was me). |
That is not really true. I was LMC graduating HS in the 1980s from a 4000 student, urban public school (with literally no parental guidance on college)...and even our school was aware that Ivy aid packages were much more generous than other schools. Ivies still required loans back in the day, but their grants were still much more generous than other schools. My net cost after grants to attend an Ivy was significantly lower than the public in-state options. I will concede that I didn't have the significant travel and other costs that you mention, which can add up. |
Top 2 percent of household income is over 400K. |
We are in our "starter home", driving 12 year old cars. Haven't been on a real vacation in almost 4 years. I had a serious medical issue, as did my DH, which tallied about $400K in medical bills. 4 sets of elderly parents that need help from time to time. Then there are taxes, insurance, and all the little fees and costs that eat way at the salary. We aren't "paycheck to paycheck." But we cannot save what you think we can. And it is absurd to think you speak for what everyone else "should be able to do." Screw you. |
My college roommate and Big Midwest University that most of you would rather die than send your kids to, got into an Ivy (I think Princeton) in the early 90s. Got no financial aid and her father refused to help (parents divorced, acrimoniously). So she had to pass on that. She got a full ride to our college but was not the same experience, obviously. |
My husband was the same in early 90s. He turned down two Ivies for a full ride at Delaware because he did not get Ivy aid as a middle class family (mom stayed at home, dad was federal engineer). He ended up going from Delaware to an Ivy league medical school (and took out loans for that) so it all worked out. |
Welcome to the real world. There are plenty of people in the same boat. We actually get FA from colleges but still need the merit money too. We are on pins and needles opening up each FA package. |
Just because you knew does NOT mean the school counselor in Texas knew. Who knows if it was a small town in TX or not, but given that he ended up at UTEP, I going to guess he might have not been from Dallas, Austin, Houston. With a HS with 4000 students you lived in a different world than most (My HS was large and I had ~400 in my graduating class) |