Feeling Stretched With Public and Private Schools

[Anonymous]

I want the best for my child.

My husband and I are trying to figure out where we should buy a house. Naturally, one of our first concerns is our infant daughter's education. There seems to be lots of real estate opportunities in the North East and other developing areas like South West, NOMA, Brookland. But, based on what I've read, the "best" schools are in the "west of the park" area, Montgomery County, Fairfax and Arlington. (I know that people have many views on the best school argument - my post is not intended to go there.) Naturally though, the homes there are quite expensive. My husband and I are both working professionals, with lofty graduate school debt. I fear that if we move to the prestigious areas we will be stretched by our mortgage and student loan debt - but our LO will be able to go to a good public elementary school and high school. If we move to developing areas, our mortgage will be manageable, but combing that with the cost of student loans and private school - we will also be stretched. The loss of a job would devastate us. I've also read about the unreliability of the lottery programs. We could rent, but do not want to go that route. It is all so overwhelming.

I never thought that I would feel so broke and powerless with a combined income of more than 300K. My husband and I both come from "working class" families, were educated at decent schools (but not Ivy). I just don't know how to navigate the system. I don't even know how to meet people who know how to navigate the system. I feel like such an outsider. And - I don't mind being an outsider, except to the extent that my lack of inclusion in the higher echelon of society effects my daughter's opportunities. Lastly, I'm annoyed that I have to care about this type of thing. Life was simpler when I was a child.

What would you do? Stretch on Mortgage - Best Public Schools. Or, stretch to pay private school and a slightly lower mortgage? Or something else?

[Anonymous]

Do what everybody else does - move to Arlington, Fairfax, or MoCo. At least your mortgage payments will build equity. Private school tuition evaporates. Especially for the lower grades. Then you can reevaluate.

[Anonymous]

Ok OP. It isn't as difficult as you think. How old is your dd? I would try to buy a house you can afford. The charter lotteries are not reliable but I do know people who have gotten in. I also think they city's demographics are changing constantly. Eventually, DCPS will improve because citizens aren't going to take it anymore. There are some private and Catholic schools that are absurdly priced. There are options.

[Anonymous]

It will be okay! Move to a neighborhood with decent public schools, and consider maybe buying less of a house than what you might have originally fantasized about. Your kid will be fine in a townhouse or even a condo in Arlington, as long as you can walk to a park. Bring down your student debt to a more manageable size, and sock away at least 3 months of emergency funds. In five years, if everything is going great, you can buy a bigger place. If things aren't going perfectly, you are still owning property is a neighborhood with good schools and doing okay.

[Anonymous]

We knew we wanted to choose our kids' schools, so we picked a less expensive part of town, which is less expensive precisely because its public schools aren't great, and we have plenty of money left for the schools of our choice.

Anyway, the schools in the more expensive areas are in many cases coasting on their reputations from the 80s and 90s, and property values are ridiculously inflated. I think it's brilliant for a young family to settle in one of the up-and-coming neighborhoods where your property is more likely to appreciate in value.

[Anonymous]

We are doing great in Brookland. Our child and most of our friends' kids are at charters. I had my choice of four schools this year!

[Anonymous]

There isn't a great difference in academic quality in elementary school between public and private schools, assuming your public option is half-way decent. We've done both. So if you're thinking of private, you might want to save your money for private or middle school.

Also, your child will be looking at colleges before you know it. We can't believe how time has flown, and now DD is interested in several private universities. Think about whether your private school expenses would preclude a private university, so that you'd have to say "no" to DC. You can borrow against your house for college....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We knew we wanted to choose our kids' schools, so we picked a less expensive part of town, which is less expensive precisely because its public schools aren't great, and we have plenty of money left for the schools of our choice.

Anyway, the schools in the more expensive areas are in many cases coasting on their reputations from the 80s and 90s, and property values are ridiculously inflated. I think it's brilliant for a young family to settle in one of the up-and-coming neighborhoods where your property is more likely to appreciate in value.

Coasting on their reputations? They seem to out performing all other DCPSs.

[Anonymous]

With an income of $300,000, I think you could buy in a good school district without stretching too much. You can buy a $600,000 place and still have quite a bit of wiggle room. you won't be in a mansion, but you can always move up after your loans are paid off. No need to be in NoMa if you don't want to be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:With an income of $300,000, I think you could buy in a good school district without stretching too much. You can buy a $600,000 place and still have quite a bit of wiggle room. you won't be in a mansion, but you can always move up after your loans are paid off. No need to be in NoMa if you don't want to be.

I agree with this. We make way less than you do and bought in MoCo. We're very happy with our neighborhood and schools.

Do you have to buy now? We saved until it was time for our child to start school, then found our place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With an income of $300,000, I think you could buy in a good school district without stretching too much. You can buy a $600,000 place and still have quite a bit of wiggle room. you won't be in a mansion, but you can always move up after your loans are paid off. No need to be in NoMa if you don't want to be.

I agree with this. We make way less than you do and bought in MoCo. We're very happy with our neighborhood and schools.

Do you have to buy now? We saved until it was time for our child to start school, then found our place.

Did you have student loan debt?

[Anonymous]

There are a number of good elementary schools in PG county, both in UP and in Bowie. Just make sure you buy a house you can sell when your kid hits middle school.

[Anonymous]

If you make over $300k then you shouldn't be drowning in anything. Sorry it is the truth. At some point, you must have lived beyond your means. Did you just graduate? I'm not trying to be judgmental but it sounds like you created your situation and you are about to recreate another situation of living beyond your means. Why can't you rent? Rent some place cheap and safe. Or buy a cheap house that should be able to be sold in the next few years but be aware that you may lose money on your house. Save your money for the next few years and if you rented you can pick up and move to whatever town or school district that you want. You will have more options if you remain flexible. Schools are influx with new rules and regulations. Who knows maybe everyone will go to open enrollment, vouchers or RTTT will either may schools equal or create disparity. Either be flexible will allow you to move with the changing times.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are a number of good elementary schools in PG county, both in UP and in Bowie. Just make sure you buy a house you can sell when your kid hits middle school.

We're in University Park, and we've known some families that moved before middle school or even elementary school, but many others have stayed where they are and chosen private schools. We would have chosen our private schools no matter where we lived.

[Anonymous]

Rent a small, cheap place for a while longer, pay down your debt and save for a downpayment. Research schools for a while. Don't buy in DC. You can get a lot more for your money in terms of school quality elsewhere. There's a lot of hysteria on this board about "bad" VA and MoCo schools that are actually quite good, but don't have as high of test scores as very wealthy neighborhoods. You may want to rent in DC while your children are eligible for free PS and PK (for 3 and 4 year olds).