Such an Awful Morning

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You want to hear about my bad morning? I had an important meeting in SE DC at 8:00 AM; the results of my presentation were to be presented to the Joint Chiefs that afternoon.

At 1:00 AM, I woke up with extreme abdominal pain, passed out, fell on the floor and broke my nose. DW calls 911; they take me to the hospital...scan me to find the cause of pain. At 5 am the ER doctor comes in, and tells me they think the pain was gas. But, incidentally, we found an 8 cm mass -- probably a tumor -- on your kidney.

That is a bad morning (oh, I got someone to cover for me at the briefing.).

Meanwhile, two hours later, our neighbor picks up her little girl (18 months), and feels something in the abdomen. Also a tumor.

Damn. Cancer cluster?

Sorry, pp.

Probably not. Just random.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hello everyone, welcome to My DCUM Kitchen. Today's episode features Lightly Fried Tuna, a reader submission by OP which intrigued readers with its eclectic combination of ingredients and unique preparation.

Ingredients:
Canned tuna
Coconut oil, spoonful
Healthy and delicious spices for antioxidants: turmeric, cumin, coriander, red chili pepper
Optional ingredient: Bitterness over living in Fairfax

Instructions:
After you've woken up late and right when you need to be walking out the door for work, assemble your ingredients. Open and drain your can of tuna as the spoonful of coconut oil melts in the pan. When the oil is melted, add your tuna and sprinkle liberally with the healthy and delicious spices that provide antioxidants.

Toss with a fork to lightly fry.



When your tuna looks sufficiently lightly fried and luridly yellow, remove from pan. Assemble sandwich for lunch: bread and cheese. OP does not indicate what kind of cheese, so recipe tester used best judgment and went with a slice of colby jack.



For best results, let sit in lunch bag for up to 4 hours before enjoying at room temperature for lunch. Due to time constraints, the recipe tester had to take bite as soon as sandwich was assembled because she was already late for work and had to get in the car to harangue husband during hour long commute.



Verdict: tastes as bad as living in Fairfax when you desperately want to live in DC feels.

I'm sitting at my desk holding back tears and laughter. This is truely phenomenal. And that looks so revolting

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If this was OP's worst morning ever, she has led a pretty charmed life. Yes, living in the suburbs and eating canned tuna does sound pretty bad, but life could be a lot worse. Perhaps she needs to see more of the world to get some perspective.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hello everyone, welcome to My DCUM Kitchen. Today's episode features Lightly Fried Tuna, a reader submission by OP which intrigued readers with its eclectic combination of ingredients and unique preparation.

Ingredients:
Canned tuna
Coconut oil, spoonful
Healthy and delicious spices for antioxidants: turmeric, cumin, coriander, red chili pepper
Optional ingredient: Bitterness over living in Fairfax

Instructions:
After you've woken up late and right when you need to be walking out the door for work, assemble your ingredients. Open and drain your can of tuna as the spoonful of coconut oil melts in the pan. When the oil is melted, add your tuna and sprinkle liberally with the healthy and delicious spices that provide antioxidants.

Toss with a fork to lightly fry.

When your tuna looks sufficiently lightly fried and luridly yellow, remove from pan. Assemble sandwich for lunch: bread and cheese. OP does not indicate what kind of cheese, so recipe tester used best judgment and went with a slice of colby jack.

For best results, let sit in lunch bag for up to 4 hours before enjoying at room temperature for lunch. Due to time constraints, the recipe tester had to take bite as soon as sandwich was assembled because she was already late for work and had to get in the car to harangue husband during hour long commute.

Verdict: tastes as bad as living in Fairfax when you desperately want to live in DC feels.

Yep, definitely #doinggodswork. May the Canned Tuna Lord bless and keep you, my friend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You want to hear about my bad morning? I had an important meeting in SE DC at 8:00 AM; the results of my presentation were to be presented to the Joint Chiefs that afternoon.

At 1:00 AM, I woke up with extreme abdominal pain, passed out, fell on the floor and broke my nose. DW calls 911; they take me to the hospital...scan me to find the cause of pain. At 5 am the ER doctor comes in, and tells me they think the pain was gas. But, incidentally, we found an 8 cm mass -- probably a tumor -- on your kidney.

That is a bad morning (oh, I got someone to cover for me at the briefing.).

Meanwhile, two hours later, our neighbor picks up her little girl (18 months), and feels something in the abdomen. Also a tumor.

Damn. Cancer cluster?

Sorry, pp.

Probably not. Just random.

So, so sorry PP. Sending prayers to both families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You want to hear about my bad morning? I had an important meeting in SE DC at 8:00 AM; the results of my presentation were to be presented to the Joint Chiefs that afternoon.

At 1:00 AM, I woke up with extreme abdominal pain, passed out, fell on the floor and broke my nose. DW calls 911; they take me to the hospital...scan me to find the cause of pain. At 5 am the ER doctor comes in, and tells me they think the pain was gas. But, incidentally, we found an 8 cm mass -- probably a tumor -- on your kidney.

That is a bad morning (oh, I got someone to cover for me at the briefing.).

Meanwhile, two hours later, our neighbor picks up her little girl (18 months), and feels something in the abdomen. Also a tumor.

Damn. Cancer cluster?

Sorry, pp.

Probably not. Just random.

So, so sorry PP. Sending prayers to both families.

PP here...day was 4 years ago. Both of us are currently No Evidence of Disease. We are both lucky.

Oh, and my definition of a good day: Any day where I wake up.

[Anonymous]

On a serious note, If I had woken up at 7:30, I would have skipped shower, lunch, b'fast and would have been out of the door by 7:45am. I can't wrap by head around the fact that at 8:20am you realized you had to be at work at 8:30?????? How does that work???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You want to hear about my bad morning? I had an important meeting in SE DC at 8:00 AM; the results of my presentation were to be presented to the Joint Chiefs that afternoon.

At 1:00 AM, I woke up with extreme abdominal pain, passed out, fell on the floor and broke my nose. DW calls 911; they take me to the hospital...scan me to find the cause of pain. At 5 am the ER doctor comes in, and tells me they think the pain was gas. But, incidentally, we found an 8 cm mass -- probably a tumor -- on your kidney.

That is a bad morning (oh, I got someone to cover for me at the briefing.).

Meanwhile, two hours later, our neighbor picks up her little girl (18 months), and feels something in the abdomen. Also a tumor.

Damn. Cancer cluster?

Sorry, pp.

Probably not. Just random.

So, so sorry PP. Sending prayers to both families.

PP here...day was 4 years ago. Both of us are currently No Evidence of Disease. We are both lucky.

Oh, and my definition of a good day: Any day where I wake up.

Wonderful to hear this. I wish you continued good health and much peace!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:On a serious note, If I had woken up at 7:30, I would have skipped shower, lunch, b'fast and would have been out of the door by 7:45am. I can't wrap by head around the fact that at 8:20am you realized you had to be at work at 8:30?????? How does that work???

Overcome by fried tuna fumes?

[Alibaba]

Someone once told me that the secret to a happy marriage is real compromise. Do you want to win every argument or stay married. OP wants to move into city and DH doesn't. The disagreement is unresolved so every time something arises that relates to the original disagreement then the OP is resentful. Resolve the original disagreement (city or suburbs) and move on. Those types of issues will ruin a marriage if you can't get passed them. They will eat away at the good parts.

[Anonymous]

Reading the original post, this person appears to be a frustrated novelist. A true romantic poet. she just needs to get it down. I recommend keeping a journal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who gets up at 7:30 when they have to be at 8:30???

This is what I don't get. You claim you have an hour long commute but you didn't get up until 7:30 when you knew you had a conference you had to set up for by 9? OP, you are the agent of your own terrible morning, not your DH.

Yes, your timing does not make sense. Is there a typo in your post? Otherwise I do not understand getting up at 7:30 when that is when you needed to leave. Then you still had to make lunch. Is it a habit to leave things until beyond the last second?

Make lunches the night before.
Get up earlier.
Don't have kids yet.

[Anonymous]

I laughed at the ridiculous whiny nature of the original post. Then I looked at the number of pages of responses and knew something DCUM'tastic must have happened.

Sure enough, there is the Lightly Fried Tuna, with photo documentation, to provide renewed faith in the comedic value of DCUM.

Brilliant! and Thank you!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hello everyone, welcome to My DCUM Kitchen. Today's episode features Lightly Fried Tuna, a reader submission by OP which intrigued readers with its eclectic combination of ingredients and unique preparation.

Ingredients:
Canned tuna
Coconut oil, spoonful
Healthy and delicious spices for antioxidants: turmeric, cumin, coriander, red chili pepper
Optional ingredient: Bitterness over living in Fairfax

Instructions:
After you've woken up late and right when you need to be walking out the door for work, assemble your ingredients. Open and drain your can of tuna as the spoonful of coconut oil melts in the pan. When the oil is melted, add your tuna and sprinkle liberally with the healthy and delicious spices that provide antioxidants.

Toss with a fork to lightly fry.



When your tuna looks sufficiently lightly fried and luridly yellow, remove from pan. Assemble sandwich for lunch: bread and cheese. OP does not indicate what kind of cheese, so recipe tester used best judgment and went with a slice of colby jack.



For best results, let sit in lunch bag for up to 4 hours before enjoying at room temperature for lunch. Due to time constraints, the recipe tester had to take bite as soon as sandwich was assembled because she was already late for work and had to get in the car to harangue husband during hour long commute.



Verdict: tastes as bad as living in Fairfax when you desperately want to live in DC feels.

Didn't OP use toasted whole wheat? None of this Wonder Bread crap. I'm also not feeling the colby jack. I think this calls for swiss or provolone. Also, that picture is making my house smell like fried tuna fish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seriously questioning everything about you and your life choices OP. You're already running late and decide to cook lunch. You know you can just go buy lunch. Frying tuna sounds effing revolting

+1