I need about $20k to get us through a layoff-home equity loan?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have the body for it, a gig at a strip club could help you out alot OP. Just wear a wig and no one will recognize you.

Op here. Honestly I considered it (well not a strip club but selling feet pics or something?) but I’m definitely not hot enough, unfortunately.

It was a stupid suggestion. No need to respond.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Y'all are so off topic. OP's kids are small and don't have mental health issues. She was just living to the max and it bit her in the a$$.

My child was diagnosed with a mental health condition when she was 2.5 yo. We've spent thousands on therapy for that condition.

Also to add, none of the therapists that treat that condition are in-network for any insurance.

So you use your health insurance, and the following year you budget for it. No one is saying medical costs are not obnoxious, but they’re hardly surprising. That’s literally the point of health insurance - to limit surprises and allow you to budget. You are bad with money if your kids’ multi-year health condition frequently made you broke.

It is obvious you haven't dealt with high quality therapists and psychiatrists. If you can get an appointment, very few accept medical insurance. I waited a year for an appt and pay close to $300 an hour for my dc's therapist and none of it is covered. Yes, I can use HSA but that is a drop in the bucket.

+1
This is true for other specialists than therapists, too. My preschool aged dd has severe medical issues that to date have not easily been fully diagnosed. She finally had an appointment with another specialist 2 weeks ago. As an example, we had to pay $480 when we booked the appointment 5 months ago. We paid another $480 at the appointment. The tests we have had as follow up so far have cost ~$1100 in a combo of payment up front, one test not at all covered by insurance and copays. It’s likely that when they are all processed we will have another several hundred if not thousands in lab bills. One prescription is not covered by insurance and is $300/month. The other prescriptions end up costing us several hundred a month. Add in our copays for all of the othwr dr appts, therapies, etc and we are spending thousands a month. To top it all off, I am not currently working bc it was impossible to manage the dr appts, calls, therapy appts, etc while working. This is basically just an example of our medical surprises in September. We spent north of $60,000 in medical expenses for her last year. We have excellent insurance so for someone to say use your insurance and budget for it is infuriating.

[Anonymous]

What industry do you work in?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Y'all are so off topic. OP's kids are small and don't have mental health issues. She was just living to the max and it bit her in the a$$.

My child was diagnosed with a mental health condition when she was 2.5 yo. We've spent thousands on therapy for that condition.

Also to add, none of the therapists that treat that condition are in-network for any insurance.

So you use your health insurance, and the following year you budget for it. No one is saying medical costs are not obnoxious, but they’re hardly surprising. That’s literally t kohe point of health insurance - to limit surprises and allow you to budget. You are bad with money if your kids’ multi-year health condition frequently made you broke.

We did not go broke (thanks for your concern, lol) but it was tough. We have an only child and it was thousands for 6 months of weekly appointments with one therapist. We are privileged that was all our child needed.

I don't think you understand what it means that none of the high quality therapists take insurance. Sure, we could have stuck with the awful therapist that was in network, but it would have been a waste of time and money, because it wouldn't have done anything for our child. That doesn't change from one year to another. And no, with young children the needs are not predictable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Y'all are so off topic. OP's kids are small and don't have mental health issues. She was just living to the max and it bit her in the a$$.

My child was diagnosed with a mental health condition when she was 2.5 yo. We've spent thousands on therapy for that condition.

Also to add, none of the therapists that treat that condition are in-network for any insurance.

So you use your health insurance, and the following year you budget for it. No one is saying medical costs are not obnoxious, but they’re hardly surprising. That’s literally the point of health insurance - to limit surprises and allow you to budget. You are bad with money if your kids’ multi-year health condition frequently made you broke.

It is obvious you haven't dealt with high quality therapists and psychiatrists. If you can get an appointment, very few accept medical insurance. I waited a year for an appt and pay close to $300 an hour for my dc's therapist and none of it is covered. Yes, I can use HSA but that is a drop in the bucket.

+1
This is true for other specialists than therapists, too. My preschool aged dd has severe medical issues that to date have not easily been fully diagnosed. She finally had an appointment with another specialist 2 weeks ago. As an example, we had to pay $480 when we booked the appointment 5 months ago. We paid another $480 at the appointment. The tests we have had as follow up so far have cost ~$1100 in a combo of payment up front, one test not at all covered by insurance and copays. It’s likely that when they are all processed we will have another several hundred if not thousands in lab bills. One prescription is not covered by insurance and is $300/month. The other prescriptions end up costing us several hundred a month. Add in our copays for all of the othwr dr appts, therapies, etc and we are spending thousands a month. To top it all off, I am not currently working bc it was impossible to manage the dr appts, calls, therapy appts, etc while working. This is basically just an example of our medical surprises in September. We spent north of $60,000 in medical expenses for her last year. We have excellent insurance so for someone to say use your insurance and budget for it is infuriating.

OP is not identifying this as an issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Y'all are so off topic. OP's kids are small and don't have mental health issues. She was just living to the max and it bit her in the a$$.

My child was diagnosed with a mental health condition when she was 2.5 yo. We've spent thousands on therapy for that condition.

Also to add, none of the therapists that treat that condition are in-network for any insurance.

So you use your health insurance, and the following year you budget for it. No one is saying medical costs are not obnoxious, but they’re hardly surprising. That’s literally t kohe point of health insurance - to limit surprises and allow you to budget. You are bad with money if your kids’ multi-year health condition frequently made you broke.

We did not go broke (thanks for your concern, lol) but it was tough. We have an only child and it was thousands for 6 months of weekly appointments with one therapist. We are privileged that was all our child needed.

I don't think you understand what it means that none of the high quality therapists take insurance. Sure, we could have stuck with the awful therapist that was in network, but it would have been a waste of time and money, because it wouldn't have done anything for our child. That doesn't change from one year to another. And no, with young children the needs are not predictable.

Some of us do and that's why we paid $400-500K for our house, not $800K-1.5million.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Y'all are so off topic. OP's kids are small and don't have mental health issues. She was just living to the max and it bit her in the a$$.

My child was diagnosed with a mental health condition when she was 2.5 yo. We've spent thousands on therapy for that condition.

Also to add, none of the therapists that treat that condition are in-network for any insurance.

So you use your health insurance, and the following year you budget for it. No one is saying medical costs are not obnoxious, but they’re hardly surprising. That’s literally the point of health insurance - to limit surprises and allow you to budget. You are bad with money if your kids’ multi-year health condition frequently made you broke.

It is obvious you haven't dealt with high quality therapists and psychiatrists. If you can get an appointment, very few accept medical insurance. I waited a year for an appt and pay close to $300 an hour for my dc's therapist and none of it is covered. Yes, I can use HSA but that is a drop in the bucket.

+1
This is true for other specialists than therapists, too. My preschool aged dd has severe medical issues that to date have not easily been fully diagnosed. She finally had an appointment with another specialist 2 weeks ago. As an example, we had to pay $480 when we booked the appointment 5 months ago. We paid another $480 at the appointment. The tests we have had as follow up so far have cost ~$1100 in a combo of payment up front, one test not at all covered by insurance and copays. It’s likely that when they are all processed we will have another several hundred if not thousands in lab bills. One prescription is not covered by insurance and is $300/month. The other prescriptions end up costing us several hundred a month. Add in our copays for all of the othwr dr appts, therapies, etc and we are spending thousands a month. To top it all off, I am not currently working bc it was impossible to manage the dr appts, calls, therapy appts, etc while working. This is basically just an example of our medical surprises in September. We spent north of $60,000 in medical expenses for her last year. We have excellent insurance so for someone to say use your insurance and budget for it is infuriating.

OP is not identifying this as an issue.

OP is saying she spent a lot of money on unexpected medical bills for two SN kids. Just because she’s not providing her life story doesn’t mean that it *couldn’t* reflect what the PP above wrote. So many judgmental people on here. It’s a sad reflection of our world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Y'all are so off topic. OP's kids are small and don't have mental health issues. She was just living to the max and it bit her in the a$$.

My child was diagnosed with a mental health condition when she was 2.5 yo. We've spent thousands on therapy for that condition.

Also to add, none of the therapists that treat that condition are in-network for any insurance.

So you use your health insurance, and the following year you budget for it. No one is saying medical costs are not obnoxious, but they’re hardly surprising. That’s literally t kohe point of health insurance - to limit surprises and allow you to budget. You are bad with money if your kids’ multi-year health condition frequently made you broke.

We did not go broke (thanks for your concern, lol) but it was tough. We have an only child and it was thousands for 6 months of weekly appointments with one therapist. We are privileged that was all our child needed.

I don't think you understand what it means that none of the high quality therapists take insurance. Sure, we could have stuck with the awful therapist that was in network, but it would have been a waste of time and money, because it wouldn't have done anything for our child. That doesn't change from one year to another. And no, with young children the needs are not predictable.

Some of us do and that's why we paid $400-500K for our house, not $800K-1.5million.

Ok? Do you want a medal?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here. This thread has really gone off the rails a bit.

I’d prefer not to get into all the details of my finances, because I wasn’t looking for a comprehensive review. I had a specific question I got it answered, and I greatly appreciate the replies.

One thing we did that has helped tremendously-I had forgotten about our childcare FSA and healthcare FSA (I might be using the wrong words for these). We never reimburse in real time and usually do it in Jan/feb/March when we turn to taxes. So I’ve already come up with $7600 I didn’t know we had.

The job in January is as certain as any job can be. Signed contract, definite start date. But I’m hoping to land something better and hence all the interviews. I’ve got a good shot of landing something better and might be able to start earlier than January.

I think we will scrape by and be Ok. I’ve been able to sell $1000 worth of stuff in the last week as well.

Thanks again for the helpful replies.

Wait, so you haven't even started the job yet and you're already looking to screw them over? You know they stopped interviewing and rejected the other candidates when they offered you the position, right?

Why not? Like the companies care about you? I once turned down an offer from a company I was working for as a contractor, just for another company to tell me that they rescinded the offer I accepted. My honesty or stupidity left me with no job. What do you care?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Y'all are so off topic. OP's kids are small and don't have mental health issues. She was just living to the max and it bit her in the a$$.

My child was diagnosed with a mental health condition when she was 2.5 yo. We've spent thousands on therapy for that condition.

Also to add, none of the therapists that treat that condition are in-network for any insurance.

So you use your health insurance, and the following year you budget for it. No one is saying medical costs are not obnoxious, but they’re hardly surprising. That’s literally t kohe point of health insurance - to limit surprises and allow you to budget. You are bad with money if your kids’ multi-year health condition frequently made you broke.

We did not go broke (thanks for your concern, lol) but it was tough. We have an only child and it was thousands for 6 months of weekly appointments with one therapist. We are privileged that was all our child needed.

I don't think you understand what it means that none of the high quality therapists take insurance. Sure, we could have stuck with the awful therapist that was in network, but it would have been a waste of time and money, because it wouldn't have done anything for our child. That doesn't change from one year to another. And no, with young children the needs are not predictable.

Wild guess but OP you sound like someone who probably supports universal health care. This exact statement is why I take approximately zero of you seriously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Y'all are so off topic. OP's kids are small and don't have mental health issues. She was just living to the max and it bit her in the a$$.

My child was diagnosed with a mental health condition when she was 2.5 yo. We've spent thousands on therapy for that condition.

Also to add, none of the therapists that treat that condition are in-network for any insurance.

So you use your health insurance, and the following year you budget for it. No one is saying medical costs are not obnoxious, but they’re hardly surprising. That’s literally t kohe point of health insurance - to limit surprises and allow you to budget. You are bad with money if your kids’ multi-year health condition frequently made you broke.

We did not go broke (thanks for your concern, lol) but it was tough. We have an only child and it was thousands for 6 months of weekly appointments with one therapist. We are privileged that was all our child needed.

I don't think you understand what it means that none of the high quality therapists take insurance. Sure, we could have stuck with the awful therapist that was in network, but it would have been a waste of time and money, because it wouldn't have done anything for our child. That doesn't change from one year to another. And no, with young children the needs are not predictable.

Wild guess but OP you sound like someone who probably supports universal health care. This exact statement is why I take approximately zero of you seriously.

I'm not OP. I am someone who has lived in a country with universal healthcare, and yes I think that would be better in many ways. I got much better mental health care there than I have here. I certainly don't see how it would be worse than our current system.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No expenses you can cut? Family to borrow from?

It sounds like you are going to have to see if you can get a loan from your bank or credit union, HELOC, or rack up some credit card debt.

Op here. We already cut way back, sold a car, etc. No family to borrow from.

My question is the best way to cover these costs, a personal loan? HELOC? Credit card debt is an option (can get a 0% card), but we can’t pay our mortgage or childcare with a credit card.

You only pay mortgage. You skip out on childcare without notice and lose your spot. You do NOT take out a high interest loan to save face/avoid losing childcare. If you haven’t paid for October, DON’T.

Op here. My kids have special needs and losing their spots is simply not an option. I’m not able to interview or apply for jobs while caring for them, and there’s zero chance we’d secure childcare for them in January when I start working again if we don’t keep their spots now.

Look, I’m not really looking for a comprehensive review of my entire life and finances and choices. The situation is what it is. My question is rather specific-what financial vehicles make the most sense for getting us $20-30k to survive between now and January?

My DH mAkes $120k, we have a ton of home equity and good credit. No debt besides mortgage. I’m sure there has to be a way to do this.

OP, I'm not one of the critical PPs but I do think you probably need to review your finances. Will this new job allow you to save more? Or do you expect some expenses with the kids to decrease soon? Because if almost all your money is still going out the door toward the house or medical expenses that is still a risky way to live. What if you were laid off again? Look, I'm sure you bought the house before having special needs kids and it was manageable, but circumstances have changed.

[Anonymous]

I would cut expenses down as low as possible.

How old are your kids?

I would start with the balance transfers with 0%. It sounds like the childcare is the expensive portion. I personally would not go into debt for childcare.

Sell anything you don’t need.

You can try for a home equity loan. Not sure if you would qualify. You could try for a reverse mortgage.

[Anonymous]

Pp here. The bank will bleed you dry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Y'all are so off topic. OP's kids are small and don't have mental health issues. She was just living to the max and it bit her in the a$$.

My child was diagnosed with a mental health condition when she was 2.5 yo. We've spent thousands on therapy for that condition.

Also to add, none of the therapists that treat that condition are in-network for any insurance.

So you use your health insurance, and the following year you budget for it. No one is saying medical costs are not obnoxious, but they’re hardly surprising. That’s literally the point of health insurance - to limit surprises and allow you to budget. You are bad with money if your kids’ multi-year health condition frequently made you broke.

It is obvious you haven't dealt with high quality therapists and psychiatrists. If you can get an appointment, very few accept medical insurance. I waited a year for an appt and pay close to $300 an hour for my dc's therapist and none of it is covered. Yes, I can use HSA but that is a drop in the bucket.

+1
This is true for other specialists than therapists, too. My preschool aged dd has severe medical issues that to date have not easily been fully diagnosed. She finally had an appointment with another specialist 2 weeks ago. As an example, we had to pay $480 when we booked the appointment 5 months ago. We paid another $480 at the appointment. The tests we have had as follow up so far have cost ~$1100 in a combo of payment up front, one test not at all covered by insurance and copays. It’s likely that when they are all processed we will have another several hundred if not thousands in lab bills. One prescription is not covered by insurance and is $300/month. The other prescriptions end up costing us several hundred a month. Add in our copays for all of the othwr dr appts, therapies, etc and we are spending thousands a month. To top it all off, I am not currently working bc it was impossible to manage the dr appts, calls, therapy appts, etc while working. This is basically just an example of our medical surprises in September. We spent north of $60,000 in medical expenses for her last year. We have excellent insurance so for someone to say use your insurance and budget for it is infuriating.

OP is not identifying this as an issue.

OP is saying she spent a lot of money on unexpected medical bills for two SN kids. Just because she’s not providing her life story doesn’t mean that it *couldn’t* reflect what the PP above wrote. So many judgmental people on here. It’s a sad reflection of our world.

A lot could be $200 or $5K, we've spent a fortune but we made appropriate housing and other choices and eventually found therapists who would take our insurance. OP is not specific so its not clear but clearly she cannot afford her lifestyle and needs to sell the house.