Social media bragging

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a swim parent, today I am blown away after SC champs at the level of intense, shameless bragging by some other swim parents about their kid's performance. I'm talking multiple pictures, video, time standards reports, MeetMobile screen shots, and in one case, even a specific mention of who their kid beat! Then all the comments and likes that further encourage this behavior - it's mind blowing. I have to admit, I am feeling very differently about a few people who have shocked me with their tacky, tasteless bragging and carrying on. I know, I know - just stay off social media, don't look if you don't like it, etc. But I have seen it now and I just really have to wonder about the psychology of these parents. Is is living vicariously or some deep insecurity? I have to wonder what it does to the kids. These are young children, who knows what the future holds for them athletically or otherwise. It's just so interesting that people feel the need to brag so outwardly. I would be so embarrassed. Anyway, just had to share my shock.

I know a particular family who has done this for at least six or seven years. What's hilarious is their two girls have plateaued if not regressed vis a vis their age range. They appeared to be regional prodigies in their tweens and early teens, but in high school, while the family is still swim obsessed and shamelessly braggy, the girls don't win or perform anywhere near the level they used to. But the mum and dad still frame their Facebook bragging the same way to make the girls sound like they're setting the world on fire. I guess people who don't know swimming are none the wiser because the responses under the bragging seem to think the girls are like D1-bound rock stars or something. It's all so pathetic.

I know a family like this. They bragged so much that people who don’t know the sport thought the girl was headed for a college scholarship or the Olympics. They posted a video of her last race at the high school state meet in a small state. I could see her name and time on the scoreboard… a 1:03 100 freestyle. Yet people were still commenting “oh what’s next college swimming” because the parents had made SUCH a big deal posting about all her meets all those years.

I wonder if this is why some people do this… they know most of their FB friends don’t really know much and will be so impressed.

Maybe, just maybe, those parents are really proud of their kids. Even if they (gasp) only swim a 1:03 in 100 freestyle.

I feel bad for your kids.

You know how you let your kids know you’re proud of them?

“You did great out there. I’m so proud of you.”

100% social media free!

This this this this this!!! My god why does this have to be explained to anyone?!?

Because they pathetic losers in life oh god

[Anonymous]

We have two swim families in our immediate social circle (our kids tried swimming very early on but gravitated towards other sports). Anyways, one of the two families won't stop oversharing about their above average but far from great kid (the kid is a dime a dozen good swimmer). The other family's swim kid of the same age is great and wins everything at the top regional level. Yet the latter family never social media brags about anything. Again, we're all in the same social circle, so it's fascinating how the good family can't take a hint to just chill out and zip it once in a while and take notes from the great family on how to display some class. I honestly feel sorry for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a parent of older swimmers, pls don’t ever post about your kid winning when they are age group swimmers. Swimming is a long game and you don’t want your kid’s identity to be about the winning - Even to grandparents or close friends who will love your kid no matter what. If your kid continues to succeed, the older accomplishments will likely get highlighted by their high school or college. And if they quit or fall off, you will be grateful you didn’t define them by their wins when they were younger so your kid now feels like a failure.

Celebrate age group champs with your kid in person (be proud of the work ethic, being a good teammate, race strategy and time drop) but don’t lose sight of the fact the swimming is for them, not for you. Your job is to raise a kind human and good citizen who can function in society. Their success in swimming is their own and not yours.

Sanest swim parent ever. Bravo!

+1. This is the correct attitude. It is 100% right that if your child has long-term success, it will be recognized by outside entities. The braggy parents think they are just being supportive and proud by sharing their kids' successes widely. Kids will feel that, even if it's subconscious, as pressure to keep succeeding whether you mean it to or not. I have seen firsthand how damaging the parental overinvestment is for athletes whose peak success was in their younger years. They feel that they are disappointing their parents when they fall off their previous trajectory and the sport stops being a positive experience for them. Kids aren't stupid. If they see you are so invested in what they are doing that you're posting about it on social media, they are going to feel pressure.

What other parents think about your posts is not what matters. The kind of message the child gets from your posting is what you need to worry about.

Well, life is a long game. I guess we should never post about any accomplishment/milestone as it will be seen as undue pressure on our child. We should never celebrate any accomplishments, big or small. I guess every child is a snowflake and should never experience failure or disappointment.

Yes! We, who are against bragging on SM, NEVER celebrate any accomplishments. You nailed it. The only way in the whole world of options is to brag on SM and since that’s frowned upon, we can’t tell our kids we are proud of them, take them out to dinner, tell grandma, text an aunt, etc. zero other options and our kids grow up feeling unsupported and unloved by unproud parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a swim parent, today I am blown away after SC champs at the level of intense, shameless bragging by some other swim parents about their kid's performance. I'm talking multiple pictures, video, time standards reports, MeetMobile screen shots, and in one case, even a specific mention of who their kid beat! Then all the comments and likes that further encourage this behavior - it's mind blowing. I have to admit, I am feeling very differently about a few people who have shocked me with their tacky, tasteless bragging and carrying on. I know, I know - just stay off social media, don't look if you don't like it, etc. But I have seen it now and I just really have to wonder about the psychology of these parents. Is is living vicariously or some deep insecurity? I have to wonder what it does to the kids. These are young children, who knows what the future holds for them athletically or otherwise. It's just so interesting that people feel the need to brag so outwardly. I would be so embarrassed. Anyway, just had to share my shock.

I know a particular family who has done this for at least six or seven years. What's hilarious is their two girls have plateaued if not regressed vis a vis their age range. They appeared to be regional prodigies in their tweens and early teens, but in high school, while the family is still swim obsessed and shamelessly braggy, the girls don't win or perform anywhere near the level they used to. But the mum and dad still frame their Facebook bragging the same way to make the girls sound like they're setting the world on fire. I guess people who don't know swimming are none the wiser because the responses under the bragging seem to think the girls are like D1-bound rock stars or something. It's all so pathetic.

I know a family like this. They bragged so much that people who don’t know the sport thought the girl was headed for a college scholarship or the Olympics. They posted a video of her last race at the high school state meet in a small state. I could see her name and time on the scoreboard… a 1:03 100 freestyle. Yet people were still commenting “oh what’s next college swimming” because the parents had made SUCH a big deal posting about all her meets all those years.

I wonder if this is why some people do this… they know most of their FB friends don’t really know much and will be so impressed.

Maybe, just maybe, those parents are really proud of their kids. Even if they (gasp) only swim a 1:03 in 100 freestyle.

I feel bad for your kids.

You know how you let your kids know you’re proud of them?

“You did great out there. I’m so proud of you.”

100% social media free!

Again - why why why are you on social media???? Do you actually like all the political posts? You don’t want to see a kid’s accomplishments? Don’t go on. Unfollow the person. This is not that hard people. I personally like all the posts of my friends kids accomplishments. I find it refreshing with all the horrible news all the time. So please just stop making fun and putting people down for using social media the way some of us like it to be used.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a swim parent, today I am blown away after SC champs at the level of intense, shameless bragging by some other swim parents about their kid's performance. I'm talking multiple pictures, video, time standards reports, MeetMobile screen shots, and in one case, even a specific mention of who their kid beat! Then all the comments and likes that further encourage this behavior - it's mind blowing. I have to admit, I am feeling very differently about a few people who have shocked me with their tacky, tasteless bragging and carrying on. I know, I know - just stay off social media, don't look if you don't like it, etc. But I have seen it now and I just really have to wonder about the psychology of these parents. Is is living vicariously or some deep insecurity? I have to wonder what it does to the kids. These are young children, who knows what the future holds for them athletically or otherwise. It's just so interesting that people feel the need to brag so outwardly. I would be so embarrassed. Anyway, just had to share my shock.

I know a particular family who has done this for at least six or seven years. What's hilarious is their two girls have plateaued if not regressed vis a vis their age range. They appeared to be regional prodigies in their tweens and early teens, but in high school, while the family is still swim obsessed and shamelessly braggy, the girls don't win or perform anywhere near the level they used to. But the mum and dad still frame their Facebook bragging the same way to make the girls sound like they're setting the world on fire. I guess people who don't know swimming are none the wiser because the responses under the bragging seem to think the girls are like D1-bound rock stars or something. It's all so pathetic.

I know a family like this. They bragged so much that people who don’t know the sport thought the girl was headed for a college scholarship or the Olympics. They posted a video of her last race at the high school state meet in a small state. I could see her name and time on the scoreboard… a 1:03 100 freestyle. Yet people were still commenting “oh what’s next college swimming” because the parents had made SUCH a big deal posting about all her meets all those years.

I wonder if this is why some people do this… they know most of their FB friends don’t really know much and will be so impressed.

Maybe, just maybe, those parents are really proud of their kids. Even if they (gasp) only swim a 1:03 in 100 freestyle.

I feel bad for your kids.

You know how you let your kids know you’re proud of them?

“You did great out there. I’m so proud of you.”

100% social media free!

Again - why why why are you on social media???? Do you actually like all the political posts? You don’t want to see a kid’s accomplishments? Don’t go on. Unfollow the person. This is not that hard people. I personally like all the posts of my friends kids accomplishments. I find it refreshing with all the horrible news all the time. So please just stop making fun and putting people down for using social media the way some of us like it to be used.

I like to see non bragging updates. Do you not know they exist?