Can Someone Please Explain Why We continue this ridiculous custom...

[Anonymous]

My son's fiancé's parents refused to let us help with anything the day of the wedding. I get it. We ended up paying for Friday night activities and brunch Sunday morning. Then I gave them any money I had left from what I would have contributed to the wedding as a gift.

[Anonymous]

When my friends and I got married, the bride and groom paid for the wedding, with both sides of the family contributing. I thought only rich people did that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Explain to me why we're spending $$$$ on weddings in the first place. One of the most idiotic customs I've ever experienced.

It's a family party. It's fun and beautiful. Different budgets are possible. I've enjoyed every wedding I've been to.

I don't regret spending money on my wedding even though I could have bought an econobox car for the price. My tightfisted grandpa said afterwards that it was worth it. I (the bride) paid for about 60%, the groom 10%, and my parents 30%. I was working and the groom was in grad school on scholarship. I have good savings now and I'm glad I didn't skimp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:...of the bride's parents paying for the wedding??? It's 2026.

I feel like we're going backwards.

Selective feminism and elective patriarchal misogyny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When my friends and I got married, the bride and groom paid for the wedding, with both sides of the family contributing. I thought only rich people did that.

This is what we did. We did a smaller reception.

I only have boys, when the time comes, I don't mind contributing but I'm not financing anything insane.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:...of the bride's parents paying for the wedding??? It's 2026.

I feel like we're going backwards.

200%

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If the grooms family was classy they would offer to split. Now at least you know what you're dealing with

Agreed. I think both should split it.

I plan on giving my DDs and DS the same amount of money and they can either buy a house or have a wedding with it. I took the money from my parents and bought a house at 22, got roommates who paid my entire mortgage.

If the parents' splitting, who's going to pay for the rehearsal dinner and honeymoon?

Pp here. I consider the rehearsal dinner part of the wedding costs.

I don’t know anyone whose parents paid for a honeymoon! Even my wealthy friends. Couples can pay for it themselves out of $$$ gifts they receive.

[Anonymous]

All you have to do is say no. They are adults, they should pay for their own choices.

[Anonymous]

We are South Asian, both families share. If bride and groom can afford it, they pay themselves and sometimes pay parents back when they can.

[Anonymous]

I don’t understand why weddings can’t be a small and simpler affair? Quality of wedding and quality of marriage have no connection. Half of the people divorce anyways, even half of them with choreographed and themed fancy weddings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Explain to me why we're spending $$$$ on weddings in the first place. One of the most idiotic customs I've ever experienced.

Just because you don’t like something and you think it’s stupid doesn’t make it so.

And just because you like something and you think it’s not stupid, doesn’t make it wise or desired.

[Anonymous]

I thought weddings were trending smaller and cheaper for this generation?

I only have sons. I dont plan to pay for their weddings. If they marry a woman whose parents pay good for them. Otherwise they can split it.

[Anonymous]

This tradition of wasting life’s savings on weddings burden so many families. I’m all for parents helping kids celebrate but a simple budget wedding. Wish and pressure for high budget weddings keeps people postpone their weddings for years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Brides paying for weddings was from the days when women did not work and the husband was responsible for all the financial load after the wedding.

This.

ZERO reason for bride’s family to pay for the wedding. ZERO. ZE-RO. And grooms’ parents who don’t pay their fair share are cheap free-riders.

[Anonymous]

I am the bride and my parents did not contribute one cent.