Always favoritism?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So tired of people always crying politics or favoritism when their kids dont get chosen. It bleeds down to the players and creates a culture of excuses as opposed to working harder to be better.

so tired of people who complain that all it takes is to "work harder" when there is clear favoritism at play. It wouldn't be such a trope if it wasn't at least a "bit" true. It sucks, but sometimes a decision is made early on and there is nothing the player can do to overcome it.

That is a poor attitude. There are plenty of ways to overcome it.

Explain. Do you mean by working hard to become so good it's undeniable? Or do you mean by deciding to play the political game too? Often the latter is far easier, imo.

How many times can your kid juggle in a row? Can they keep up the ball 50x in a row with laces, inside foot, outside foot, thighs, chest and head?

Are their 5-10-5 shuttle, 400m, 800m and 1,600m times in the top 10% percentile of your age group.

Can they win 25% of their 1v1’s?

Is your kid scanning at least every 10-15 seconds (which is a slow rate) and able to scan and turn with anticipation?

Are they proficient with shooting, passing and receiving with both their left foot and right foot?

How is their ankle flexion, hip mobility and CofD agility?

After all of that, can they play in a neutral field without their squad or support from Mommy and Daddy?

Everybody wants to talk a great game without acknowledging the work. If you don’t get picked, pick a question above and start doing the work to become undeniable.

YES do all this and it still may not matter. LOL this unfortunately is youth soccer today, mom and dad are doing a lot of the heavy lifting.

It's also life. There are all kinds of disappointments ahead for our kids. They learn how to deal with them in sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Juggling is probbaly most important, Being able to do it shows attention to craft and training cause its not hard but it takes dedicated time to get comfortable doing. This time plays out in every touch on the field when you learn inherently how the ball behaves when you use outside foot, insole, botton, top of thigh, inner thigh, chest, shoulders, head etc.... Manipulating the ball = soccer . Juggling is kind of important simple excercise to ball mastery

Sorry, but if you are realistic with what coaches want - bigger/stronger/faster. That's a nice little cherry on top, but you can't teach a slow/small kid to be bigger/faster and almost every coach sees it this way. We don't live in this idealized 'perfect' world.

Yes bigger stronger and faster but can’t do much with the ball when they get it. This is not 🏈 it is ⚽️

Well I'm talking about the girls side and that's all that matters there. Sorry if you don't like that, but it's what they select. You can continue to bury your head in the sand. Coaches continue to think they can teach those aspects later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So tired of people always crying politics or favoritism when their kids dont get chosen. It bleeds down to the players and creates a culture of excuses as opposed to working harder to be better.

so tired of people who complain that all it takes is to "work harder" when there is clear favoritism at play. It wouldn't be such a trope if it wasn't at least a "bit" true. It sucks, but sometimes a decision is made early on and there is nothing the player can do to overcome it.

That is a poor attitude. There are plenty of ways to overcome it.

Explain. Do you mean by working hard to become so good it's undeniable? Or do you mean by deciding to play the political game too? Often the latter is far easier, imo.

How many times can your kid juggle in a row? Can they keep up the ball 50x in a row with laces, inside foot, outside foot, thighs, chest and head?

Are their 5-10-5 shuttle, 400m, 800m and 1,600m times in the top 10% percentile of your age group.

Can they win 25% of their 1v1’s?

Is your kid scanning at least every 10-15 seconds (which is a slow rate) and able to scan and turn with anticipation?

Are they proficient with shooting, passing and receiving with both their left foot and right foot?

How is their ankle flexion, hip mobility and CofD agility?

After all of that, can they play in a neutral field without their squad or support from Mommy and Daddy?

Everybody wants to talk a great game without acknowledging the work. If you don’t get picked, pick a question above and start doing the work to become undeniable.

you describe maybe the top 3-4 kids on the top team. The next 7 are generally replaceable. Then we all know the rest are generally B team kids who joined earlier. Unfortunately youth soccer is about timing and who you know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Juggling is probbaly most important, Being able to do it shows attention to craft and training cause its not hard but it takes dedicated time to get comfortable doing. This time plays out in every touch on the field when you learn inherently how the ball behaves when you use outside foot, insole, botton, top of thigh, inner thigh, chest, shoulders, head etc.... Manipulating the ball = soccer . Juggling is kind of important simple excercise to ball mastery

Sorry, but if you are realistic with what coaches want - bigger/stronger/faster. That's a nice little cherry on top, but you can't teach a slow/small kid to be bigger/faster and almost every coach sees it this way. We don't live in this idealized 'perfect' world.

Yes bigger stronger and faster but can’t do much with the ball when they get it. This is not 🏈 it is ⚽️

want to bet. If they played soccer whole career the less technical athletes generally beat smaller slower but more technical. You can do crap if you cant win ball in space or constantly get knocked of it.

[Anonymous]

Back to the original post, Coaches can and do naturally develop favorites.

It is more than just starting them or rarely subbing them out at U12 and below. It can be frustrating when they use them for 'examples' on how to do the drill correctly, always call on them, always put them in the middle, always use them as the 'neutral player,' and when their favorite player makes a mistake, they stop the play to let them do it over until they get it correct! -All while the other kids are on the periphery and have to watch over and over.

A kid who is treated so well, will 100% pay attention and identify with the Coach far more then the other kids.

Then, there are the parents who talk to the Coach before or after a lot of practices. So much so, you have to wonder what is going on.

We have had to put on feed back for the Coach to rotate the 'neutral players' more and mix the kids up more as they are still developing.

Its shocking to me a Coach doesn't know to do this. The Coach has very young kids, so its obvious he doesn't know how to deal with older kids.

Favoritism can easily occur after spending so much time together, the Coach must work on developing a skill to not let perceived favoritism ruin the Esprit d Corps of the team.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Back to the original post, Coaches can and do naturally develop favorites.

It is more than just starting them or rarely subbing them out at U12 and below. It can be frustrating when they use them for 'examples' on how to do the drill correctly, always call on them, always put them in the middle, always use them as the 'neutral player,' and when their favorite player makes a mistake, they stop the play to let them do it over until they get it correct! -All while the other kids are on the periphery and have to watch over and over.

A kid who is treated so well, will 100% pay attention and identify with the Coach far more then the other kids.

Then, there are the parents who talk to the Coach before or after a lot of practices. So much so, you have to wonder what is going on.

We have had to put on feed back for the Coach to rotate the 'neutral players' more and mix the kids up more as they are still developing.

Its shocking to me a Coach doesn't know to do this. The Coach has very young kids, so its obvious he doesn't know how to deal with older kids.

Favoritism can easily occur after spending so much time together, the Coach must work on developing a skill to not let perceived favoritism ruin the Esprit d Corps of the team.

this is a deep cut to our current top 20 ECNL team. It still happens there (not DMV)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So tired of people always crying politics or favoritism when their kids dont get chosen. It bleeds down to the players and creates a culture of excuses as opposed to working harder to be better.

so tired of people who complain that all it takes is to "work harder" when there is clear favoritism at play. It wouldn't be such a trope if it wasn't at least a "bit" true. It sucks, but sometimes a decision is made early on and there is nothing the player can do to overcome it.

That is a poor attitude. There are plenty of ways to overcome it.

Explain. Do you mean by working hard to become so good it's undeniable? Or do you mean by deciding to play the political game too? Often the latter is far easier, imo.

How many times can your kid juggle in a row? Can they keep up the ball 50x in a row with laces, inside foot, outside foot, thighs, chest and head?

Are their 5-10-5 shuttle, 400m, 800m and 1,600m times in the top 10% percentile of your age group.

Can they win 25% of their 1v1’s?

Is your kid scanning at least every 10-15 seconds (which is a slow rate) and able to scan and turn with anticipation?

Are they proficient with shooting, passing and receiving with both their left foot and right foot?

How is their ankle flexion, hip mobility and CofD agility?

After all of that, can they play in a neutral field without their squad or support from Mommy and Daddy?

Everybody wants to talk a great game without acknowledging the work. If you don’t get picked, pick a question above and start doing the work to become undeniable.

Yes. Yea yes yes. Juggling record in the thousands. Makes opponents fall in 1v1. Equal shots and goals w both feet . Scans constantly. Second team. Why? Very late to grow and develop. Still growing at 16!

So her height and stature have her on 2nd team, not politics. You can be the best and most skilled 4’11” basketball player in the world but you are not playing in the NBA.

If she can win her 1v1’s more than 25% of the time, is in the top 10% of her age in speed and studies the game to know how to occupy space, you are sh-ting yourself. The 1st team level is not that great to keep out a kid with all of those attributes, sorry. You have parent 🥽 on.

Yes, some kids on the 1st team probably should not be there. Yes, you can’t be 101% better than a 1st teamer to supplant them. You need to be 110%+. This is no different than college admissions, job applications, office politics and real politics. You can either prepare your kid to compete against unfair advantages (like some portions of our population do daily) or make excuses. Your choice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a dumb thread

This has to be from the USYNT camp invite announcements. Its always the invites that sets the people off.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is a dumb thread

This has to be from the USYNT camp invite announcements. Its always the invites that sets the people off.

Nah wake me up when you make the national team. Otherwise it is pure favoritism and everyone knows it. These call ups are more of an embarrassment than anything else. Some deserve the call ups but the majority is just a matter of who is the coach ‘s pet.

[Anonymous]

Oh no, there is subjective selection and attention given by coaches. Oh wait, this is also defined as favoritism. Gee, sure am glad this only occurs in kids soccer and not anywhere else in life. We all know life is fair, meritocracy is strictly adhered to. Hate to have to see them fight to overcome favoritism the rest of their lives. Sure does not exist in government employment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So tired of people always crying politics or favoritism when their kids dont get chosen. It bleeds down to the players and creates a culture of excuses as opposed to working harder to be better.

so tired of people who complain that all it takes is to "work harder" when there is clear favoritism at play. It wouldn't be such a trope if it wasn't at least a "bit" true. It sucks, but sometimes a decision is made early on and there is nothing the player can do to overcome it.

That is a poor attitude. There are plenty of ways to overcome it.

Explain. Do you mean by working hard to become so good it's undeniable? Or do you mean by deciding to play the political game too? Often the latter is far easier, imo.

How many times can your kid juggle in a row? Can they keep up the ball 50x in a row with laces, inside foot, outside foot, thighs, chest and head?

Are their 5-10-5 shuttle, 400m, 800m and 1,600m times in the top 10% percentile of your age group.

Can they win 25% of their 1v1’s?

Is your kid scanning at least every 10-15 seconds (which is a slow rate) and able to scan and turn with anticipation?

Are they proficient with shooting, passing and receiving with both their left foot and right foot?

How is their ankle flexion, hip mobility and CofD agility?

After all of that, can they play in a neutral field without their squad or support from Mommy and Daddy?

Everybody wants to talk a great game without acknowledging the work. If you don’t get picked, pick a question above and start doing the work to become undeniable.

This is less things to do than a list of attributes/results which may define a player good enough to overcome politics. So in essence, the advice is "get good." These questions are: does your kid have good touch; is your kid good; is your kid fast; is your kid a smart player; is your kid self-motivated? All these points may define parts of a good player, and are worth working towards. But the complaint people are making stands - after becoming better than kids ahead, in all the ways mentioned, unless you are *sufficiently* better than those competing for spots, politics will matter.

My kid has gone from B to A, switched to a higher-caliber club, and again went from B to A. She worked hard on all these things. But the real push over the edge, in both cases, when she was in that B/A overlap range, was that the coaches really liked her work ethic at practices, while on teams with attitude-problem players. She became a coach's favorite both times through a good attitude in practices (and games) more so than getting good enough to immediately be top half of A. I consider that a form of coach-favorite politics, but I find it less offensive than some other types of politics because it's somewhat earned.

In my observation, most of the bottom half of A teams are: early developers who made the A track at 8-9 years old and just keep hanging on to the spot, kids with all-star siblings in the club, kids who do lots of private training with a coach at the club (not outside), kids with parents who threaten to leave, or kids who were stolen from the club's biggest rival. These kids are hard to displace unless your politics are stronger or you are undeniably better.

DP. I agree with what you're saying about attitude and work ethic. We have been at two different clubs with four different coaches and DC has ended up a coach favorite each time. They are a hard worker, self-motivated, always listening even when others are goofing off, unselfish, and they don't give up on plays. At old club was moved up from B to A, and at new club moved from ok playing time to consistently starting and playing full minutes. Neither my spouse nor I ever talk to the coaches unless it's about DC missing practice or something. I am sure some other parents don't understand why DC was moved up or how they ended up a favorite, and think their kid is more talented. But sometimes the talented kids don't have the best attitudes and can't always be relied upon in games. I think one of the best things for DC was to start out on a B team and have something to work for early on. Some of the A team kids take their spots for granted and their parents don't see how they are getting passed by kids who developed a bit later and work harder to get better.

[Anonymous]

The kid who is serious and works hard at practice and is determined in games will always be a favorite over even a slightly more talented or athletic kid who messes around or is inconsistent in focus/determination in play. Coaches are trying to extrapolate out to what a player can become. Being coachable is important to long term development. Not necessarily bad for coaches to favor these players.

[Anonymous]

Bahahahahhahahahahahhahaha
cry me a river

[Anonymous]

DD isnt there yet, age wise. But have to assume at some point, results will matter and coaches will have to have the best 11 on the field, regardless of personal feelings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So tired of people always crying politics or favoritism when their kids dont get chosen. It bleeds down to the players and creates a culture of excuses as opposed to working harder to be better.

so tired of people who complain that all it takes is to "work harder" when there is clear favoritism at play. It wouldn't be such a trope if it wasn't at least a "bit" true. It sucks, but sometimes a decision is made early on and there is nothing the player can do to overcome it.

That is a poor attitude. There are plenty of ways to overcome it.

Explain. Do you mean by working hard to become so good it's undeniable? Or do you mean by deciding to play the political game too? Often the latter is far easier, imo.

How many times can your kid juggle in a row? Can they keep up the ball 50x in a row with laces, inside foot, outside foot, thighs, chest and head?

Are their 5-10-5 shuttle, 400m, 800m and 1,600m times in the top 10% percentile of your age group.

Can they win 25% of their 1v1’s?

Is your kid scanning at least every 10-15 seconds (which is a slow rate) and able to scan and turn with anticipation?

Are they proficient with shooting, passing and receiving with both their left foot and right foot?

How is their ankle flexion, hip mobility and CofD agility?

After all of that, can they play in a neutral field without their squad or support from Mommy and Daddy?

Everybody wants to talk a great game without acknowledging the work. If you don’t get picked, pick a question above and start doing the work to become undeniable.

Yes. Yea yes yes. Juggling record in the thousands. Makes opponents fall in 1v1. Equal shots and goals w both feet . Scans constantly. Second team. Why? Very late to grow and develop. Still growing at 16!

So her height and stature have her on 2nd team, not politics. You can be the best and most skilled 4’11” basketball player in the world but you are not playing in the NBA.

If she can win her 1v1’s more than 25% of the time, is in the top 10% of her age in speed and studies the game to know how to occupy space, you are sh-ting yourself. The 1st team level is not that great to keep out a kid with all of those attributes, sorry. You have parent 🥽 on.

Yes, some kids on the 1st team probably should not be there. Yes, you can’t be 101% better than a 1st teamer to supplant them. You need to be 110%+. This is no different than college admissions, job applications, office politics and real politics. You can either prepare your kid to compete against unfair advantages (like some portions of our population do daily) or make excuses. Your choice.

You misread. I am agreeing with you! Should not be first team without the physical attributes. It is more than skills for sure. It’s a very physical game.