Men who turned out to be creeps/predators

[Anonymous]

I'm a terrible judge of people so I wont pick up creep vibes. BUUUUT I have a strong shit detector. I was basically ungroomable as a child/adolescent/young woman because I am naturally suspicious of anyone being too nice or generous. Praise makes me wary. Same with my kid. A teacher or coach gives him or her too much praise or special attention, and my hackles go up and I start paying a lot of attention.

That is all you need, imo, to be safe. Have a good but realistic self esteem so that if someone with money or power or access in interested in you, ask yourself . . . why?

[Anonymous]

It's easy to tell. The men who have a charming, cocky, "alpha" personality. They're the kind of men who also put other men down by calling them weak, "pussies," etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I assume most men are inclined to perversion and don’t respect boundaries until proven wrong.

Men are truly a threat to public health and safety - across nations and time. We just don’t talk about it (or care, evidently) because patriarchy, I guess.

+1

[Anonymous]

I think of myself as being intuitively right about people but I've been fooled twice by men. They were not people I was in a relationship with. I was completely fooled by them. I can think of a couple of women who fooled me too.

I think most people give "tells" when they lie or are doing something wrong but there are some people who are masters at being deceitful.

I am glad I was fooled because it made me more cautious. I also to know that my intuition is not foolproof. It's not judt other people, I am also able to be conned.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get this feeling about 75% of men, honestly.

Came in to say the same.

[Anonymous]

The only really scary man I ever got involved with threw a lot of red flags right away. I ignored them at my own peril.

The scariest man/biggest creep and predator I ever knew was my stepfather. If you didn't know when you met him, you did soon enough -- he made who he was quite clear. People tend to tell you who they are; you need only listen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ann Rule wrote about this years ago in her book “The Stranger Beside Me”. She had been a coworker of Ted Bundy and said there was absolutely nothing even remotely sinister about him, describing him as kind and empathetic.

Yep, exactly - it's not as cut and dry as posters in this thread make it out to be.

+1. I had a coworker sent to prison for child porn and while he was on the quiet side and mostly kept to himself, there was nothing sinister about him. And it turned out part of his crime was chatting with an FBI agent from his desk in our open workspace.

Wish I could say I am shocked. Unfortunately I'm not. At all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's easy to tell. The men who have a charming, cocky, "alpha" personality. They're the kind of men who also put other men down by calling them weak, "pussies," etc.

NP
Many types of men can be creeps.
I can tell sometimes, I think some traits raise alarms for me BUT there have been a couple I could not see anything suspicious despite people around me mentioning how creepy that person was. It was like willfully blinding myself. After they do something repulsive, all the signs seem so obvious. Maybe it's a live and learn thing.

[Anonymous]

I find going onto the VA registered Sex Offender website shows how similar a lot of them look. Usually weird facial features...small close set eyes, overly small or long foreheads, strange jaw and chin shapes. There is definitely a look. I wonder if someone studies facial features and could weigh in?

[Anonymous]

No when I was young and naive. To be honest, they were more than twice my age and married. I was attracted to men my own age. It never crossed my mind to see the creeps as potential sexual partners .

I always rejected them, but they probably had no idea how revolted and shocked I was that they thought they had a shot in the universe of scoring with me.

[Anonymous]

The sick creeks I encountered looked like quiet losers.

[Anonymous]

The teacher creep I encountered in elementary school was married (to a pretty, young, pregnant teacher in the same school). He flattered me and my friend by telling us we were women not girls to him. He also gave us special privileges and shared inside jokes that made us feel cool/chosen in the classroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I find going onto the VA registered Sex Offender website shows how similar a lot of them look. Usually weird facial features...small close set eyes, overly small or long foreheads, strange jaw and chin shapes. There is definitely a look. I wonder if someone studies facial features and could weigh in?

You are calling for the resurgence of the long discredited field of “physiognomy” where so called scientific experts would use facial features to determine criminality or personality?

You are literally a threat to civil society yourself and yet here you sit in judgement of others. SMH

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can always tell. And I'm always correct. I'm just naturally gifted at reading people.

Any tips for the rest of us?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I find going onto the VA registered Sex Offender website shows how similar a lot of them look. Usually weird facial features...small close set eyes, overly small or long foreheads, strange jaw and chin shapes. There is definitely a look. I wonder if someone studies facial features and could weigh in?

You are calling for the resurgence of the long discredited field of “physiognomy” where so called scientific experts would use facial features to determine criminality or personality?

You are literally a threat to civil society yourself and yet here you sit in judgement of others. SMH

Thanks! I'm always right on the weirdos. But do have fun getting taken advantage of and then complaining that "he seemed like a nice but weird guy."