Workaholic for a boss

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a professional, late-50s, and have never had a scheduled lunch break and have worked multiple jobs (public, private, for profit and not for profit). A meeting at that time, I would bring my lunch and eat during the meeting, and would expect everyone else to do the same

I’m a 50 yo senior level professional and have never attended nor ever planned a meeting that covered a period of more than one hour when people traditionally eat and not served food. If the meeting is from 12-1, everyone can eat before or after. If it’s from 11-2, the planner needs to serve lunch. To not do so shows a complete disregard for the meeting attendees, is rude and unprofessional.

[Anonymous]

I would clarify if lunch was being served at the meeting: “are we ordering lunch or should I eat beforehand?”. Likewise, if I forgot to mention lunch in the calendar invite, I would expect someone to ask me.

As for working at all hours, it’s not a huge deal as long as: 1) culture (not a wellness disclosure) dictates non-emergency work is not required after business hours, and 2) your boss is actually available during said business hours.

I once had a boss who was routinely MIA during the workday but would email/text/message all night and weekend, which meant if I needed to interact my with boss, I was working his hours, regardless of any “wellness” message in his email signature.

[Anonymous]

My old boss had obvious ADHD. She was always all over the place and everyone talked about it. You’d be in her office for a meeting and she’d be scrolling the internet looking at shoes or something. Then around 6:00, she’d get stressed (likely because she didn’t get anything done all day) and starts calling everyone on the team asking for things. Everyone got extremely frustrated by the fact that they worked all day and she didn’t seem to really start working until everyone else was ready to sign off. I worked for her for a year and a half before I found a new job. My new boss gives me 100% attention in meetings and at the end of the day is always telling us to sign off, whatever we’re working on can wait.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a professional, late-50s, and have never had a scheduled lunch break and have worked multiple jobs (public, private, for profit and not for profit). A meeting at that time, I would bring my lunch and eat during the meeting, and would expect everyone else to do the same

I’ve always worked in the private sector (as an attorney) so perhaps my experience is skewed, but very few people bring their lunch. They’re always ordering in. Grocery shopping and packing a lunch takes time I don’t have.

[Anonymous]

The husband must cheat on her.

[Anonymous]

I’ve gone through almost the exact same experience, except in my case she worked in local government. Unfortunately, she stayed in that role for years, even though she couldn’t retain employees to save her life. People came in motivated and hopeful, and within a few months they were burned out or already looking for the exit. Upper management knew exactly what the issues were and even put measures in place to make sure she was never promoted any higher, especially since she didn’t have the professional certifications required for the position above her. But despite that, we were still the ones who had to deal with her day to day, trying to navigate the constant confusion and last-minute chaos she created. She was genuinely the most scatterbrained person I’d ever worked with. There was no direction, no planning, no prioritizing, just nonstop disorder. Every day felt like a guessing game of what fire drill she was going to invent out of nowhere. It was exhausting, especially because none of it had to be that way. In government these situations drag on forever, but eventually the turnover rate started to speak for itself. Honestly, I’m just glad I finally got out and moved to the private sector, it was the best decision I could’ve made.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a professional, late-50s, and have never had a scheduled lunch break and have worked multiple jobs (public, private, for profit and not for profit). A meeting at that time, I would bring my lunch and eat during the meeting, and would expect everyone else to do the same

Unless it was completely unavoidable I would be super annoyed if someone scheduled a meeting through lunch time without a clear break in the agenda for lunch or a catered lunch. It’s really thoughtless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work with a woman who’s up and working by 4AM. She’ll take 3 flights instead of 1 to save $100. Why have a single hotel room for one person when two or three people can share? Why send a simple email when you can Teams, text, call, slack, and text again in a 3 minute period? She’s an insane workaholic who’s pennywise and pound foolish. She’s a decent person with a family but never stops working.

Thankfully she is not my boss!

I know someone like this very well. She is completely insane but has risen very high in our field and gotten her kid into a very exclusive test in school so it clearly works for her. However I would never, ever want to work for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a professional, late-50s, and have never had a scheduled lunch break and have worked multiple jobs (public, private, for profit and not for profit). A meeting at that time, I would bring my lunch and eat during the meeting, and would expect everyone else to do the same

I’m a 50 yo senior level professional and have never attended nor ever planned a meeting that covered a period of more than one hour when people traditionally eat and not served food. If the meeting is from 12-1, everyone can eat before or after. If it’s from 11-2, the planner needs to serve lunch. To not do so shows a complete disregard for the meeting attendees, is rude and unprofessional.

+1. To not do this shows a tremendous lack of people skills. Even the 12-1 meeting is questionable and should come with apologies for there being no other time slot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve gone through almost the exact same experience, except in my case she worked in local government. Unfortunately, she stayed in that role for years, even though she couldn’t retain employees to save her life. People came in motivated and hopeful, and within a few months they were burned out or already looking for the exit. Upper management knew exactly what the issues were and even put measures in place to make sure she was never promoted any higher, especially since she didn’t have the professional certifications required for the position above her. But despite that, we were still the ones who had to deal with her day to day, trying to navigate the constant confusion and last-minute chaos she created. She was genuinely the most scatterbrained person I’d ever worked with. There was no direction, no planning, no prioritizing, just nonstop disorder. Every day felt like a guessing game of what fire drill she was going to invent out of nowhere. It was exhausting, especially because none of it had to be that way. In government these situations drag on forever, but eventually the turnover rate started to speak for itself. Honestly, I’m just glad I finally got out and moved to the private sector, it was the best decision I could’ve made.

I read this and I truly wonder how these people get promoted.

[Anonymous]

This is bad news in a boss

You need to plan an escape.

At the very least, such a person can't effectively advocate for you, something that is crucial to advancement.

They are going to think you are slacking off just for having human needs.

At the worst, it will shorten your life by a few years

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I work with a woman who’s up and working by 4AM. She’ll take 3 flights instead of 1 to save $100. Why have a single hotel room for one person when two or three people can share? Why send a simple email when you can Teams, text, call, slack, and text again in a 3 minute period? She’s an insane workaholic who’s pennywise and pound foolish. She’s a decent person with a family but never stops working.

Thankfully she is not my boss!

I know someone like this very well. She is completely insane but has risen very high in our field and gotten her kid into a very exclusive test in school so it clearly works for her. However I would never, ever want to work for her.

Wanted to add - she is not disorganized and gets a tremendous amount accomplished. She just sets extremely high standards in terms of the quantity of work for herself and her employees.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you have an unpaid lunch break in there or something?

I've been working for 18 years and have never had a lunch break so it's never been on my radar and I could accidentally be that boss I guess.

I also send emails at weird times. As a working single mom, if I can't sleep at 3am I might as well play catch up. However, I do literally have my email signature saying "Wellbeing Notice: Receiving this email outside of normal working hours? Managing work and life responsibilities is unique for everyone. I have sent this email at a time that works for me. Please respond at a time that works for you."

Nicely played. I like your well being notice. I don’t mind when emails come in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does she expect you to respond to emails at all hours and on the weekends? Sometimes people send email when it works for them and it doesn't mean you need to respond.

- 40-something boss who's married with 2 kids and gets work done when I can, though if I'm working nights/weekends, I generally try to hold emails to my team to send during business hours

This! If she doesn't expect an immediate response, I don't think this is a problem?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a boss like this. It was horrible. she sent emails at all hours of the night was incredibly inefficient and disorganized. She made her emergencies everybody's emergency.

She would sometimes call a meeting at 4 o'clock in the afternoon with the intent of meeting a deadline the next day, which meant all hands on deck, but we would be working till 10 or 11 o'clock at night. Unplanned on our side because we did not know that she had this deadline looming.
Anyway, I left the company and I heard through the grapevine that pretty much the entire team left and then she was demoted.

This sounds less like a workaholic problem than a disorganized procrastinator with poor executive functioning skills problem.