Should I let my trans tween wear a binder?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m sure this post will be deleted but your daughter is only 11. She’s not trans, she’s feeling awkward about her body which is probably developing faster than her peers and her mental and emotional capacity to deal with it. Be an actual good parent and help her navigate the awkwardness (which MOST kids will experience to some degree or another around puberty) without potentially ruining her life.

If she still feels she’s trans at 18 then feel free to support her/him in that area then.

You’re so right. My buying her a sports bra or binder is irreversible. Thanks for talking me down.

You misunderstand. It’s your encouragement of her idea that she is trans that may potentially lead to some irreversible, life-ruining decisions.

I get it though, you’re a woke liberal mom and it’s super trendy and cool to have a trans kid. Good luck.

NP here, I actually am a liberal mom. BTW woke is not the pejorative you think it is, all it means is that you are aware of and educated on social injustices. Anyway, the only part of your post I agree with is that 11 might be a tad young (re: trans) but definitely nothing wrong with buying a compression sports bra for someone who is more developed than her peers. It's not fun being (relatively) big chested amongst your peers. GL.

Np. A sports bra is fine, but binders can actually be dangerous, especially to a developing body. They can cause permanent damage to the rib cage and breast tissue. Op should be careful.

PP here. Yes, agree. I should have said that as well. Please don't do a binder, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m sure this post will be deleted but your daughter is only 11. She’s not trans, she’s feeling awkward about her body which is probably developing faster than her peers and her mental and emotional capacity to deal with it. Be an actual good parent and help her navigate the awkwardness (which MOST kids will experience to some degree or another around puberty) without potentially ruining her life.

If she still feels she’s trans at 18 then feel free to support her/him in that area then.

You’re so right. My buying her a sports bra or binder is irreversible. Thanks for talking me down.

You misunderstand. It’s your encouragement of her idea that she is trans that may potentially lead to some irreversible, life-ruining decisions.

I get it though, you’re a woke liberal mom and it’s super trendy and cool to have a trans kid. Good luck.

NP here, I actually am a liberal mom. BTW woke is not the pejorative you think it is, all it means is that you are aware of and educated on social injustices. Anyway, the only part of your post I agree with is that 11 might be a tad young (re: trans) but definitely nothing wrong with buying a compression sports bra for someone who is more developed than her peers. It's not fun being (relatively) big chested amongst your peers. GL.

Np. A sports bra is fine, but binders can actually be dangerous, especially to a developing body. They can cause permanent damage to the rib cage and breast tissue. Op should be careful.

OP here. Thanks - that’s why I asked the question. I legitimately wanted to know the risks.

[Anonymous]

OP again - the underarmour compression sports bras are half the price of the Nike swoosh ones. Are they roundabout as good?

[Anonymous]

Can you talk to her about loving her body?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m sure this post will be deleted but your daughter is only 11. She’s not trans, she’s feeling awkward about her body which is probably developing faster than her peers and her mental and emotional capacity to deal with it. Be an actual good parent and help her navigate the awkwardness (which MOST kids will experience to some degree or another around puberty) without potentially ruining her life.

If she still feels she’s trans at 18 then feel free to support her/him in that area then.

l

OP ignore this post.
Please ignore ignorant people who have no idea what they are talking about

[Anonymous]

A minimizing bra. 95% of 11 year olds would be embarrassed to have c cups.

[Anonymous]

My daughter wanted to wear a binder because she is large chested at a young age, so let me preface that she is not trans.

The very expensive Nike sports bra made her feel much better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m sure this post will be deleted but your daughter is only 11. She’s not trans, she’s feeling awkward about her body which is probably developing faster than her peers and her mental and emotional capacity to deal with it. Be an actual good parent and help her navigate the awkwardness (which MOST kids will experience to some degree or another around puberty) without potentially ruining her life.

If she still feels she’s trans at 18 then feel free to support her/him in that area then.

You’re so right. My buying her a sports bra or binder is irreversible. Thanks for talking me down.

You misunderstand. It’s your encouragement of her idea that she is trans that may potentially lead to some irreversible, life-ruining decisions.

I get it though, you’re a woke liberal mom and it’s super trendy and cool to have a trans kid. Good luck.

NP here, I actually am a liberal mom. BTW woke is not the pejorative you think it is, all it means is that you are aware of and educated on social injustices. Anyway, the only part of your post I agree with is that 11 might be a tad young (re: trans) but definitely nothing wrong with buying a compression sports bra for someone who is more developed than her peers. It's not fun being (relatively) big chested amongst your peers. GL.

Np. A sports bra is fine, but binders can actually be dangerous, especially to a developing body. They can cause permanent damage to the rib cage and breast tissue. Op should be careful.

I agree with this post. Sports bra. Binders aren't meant for children that are still growing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m sure this post will be deleted but your daughter is only 11. She’s not trans, she’s feeling awkward about her body which is probably developing faster than her peers and her mental and emotional capacity to deal with it. Be an actual good parent and help her navigate the awkwardness (which MOST kids will experience to some degree or another around puberty) without potentially ruining her life.

If she still feels she’s trans at 18 then feel free to support her/him in that area then.

You’re so right. My buying her a sports bra or binder is irreversible. Thanks for talking me down.

You misunderstand. It’s your encouragement of her idea that she is trans that may potentially lead to some irreversible, life-ruining decisions.

I get it though, you’re a woke liberal mom and it’s super trendy and cool to have a trans kid. Good luck.

NP here, I actually am a liberal mom. BTW woke is not the pejorative you think it is, all it means is that you are aware of and educated on social injustices. Anyway, the only part of your post I agree with is that 11 might be a tad young (re: trans) but definitely nothing wrong with buying a compression sports bra for someone who is more developed than her peers. It's not fun being (relatively) big chested amongst your peers. GL.

Ha! No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can you talk to her about loving her body?

Why do you presume I don’t talk to her this way? Or that such talk would be effective? Think back to what you felt about your body at age 11 and how much your mom’s statements had anything to do with that…

[Anonymous]

When my dd was 11/12 she cut her hair boy short, asked for a binder, and started wearing androgynous clothes. We did not agree to the binder, let her wear whatever sports bras she felt comfortable with, supported her with everything else.

She’s 16 now and wears a bikini to the pool and identifies as a girl.

I wouldn’t rush into anything permanent unless you are sure sure sure, like your kid has identified as a boy from a very young age. This was a phase for our dd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When my dd was 11/12 she cut her hair boy short, asked for a binder, and started wearing androgynous clothes. We did not agree to the binder, let her wear whatever sports bras she felt comfortable with, supported her with everything else.

She’s 16 now and wears a bikini to the pool and identifies as a girl.

I wouldn’t rush into anything permanent unless you are sure sure sure, like your kid has identified as a boy from a very young age. This was a phase for our dd.

I am OP. I’m totally open to this happening this way. I’m really only asking about bras. People here are very reactive thinking I’m asking about more. I’ve been pretty clear about what we are asking. It’s amazing how many people want to turn it into more. As if I’m scheduling my 11 year old for surgery.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When my dd was 11/12 she cut her hair boy short, asked for a binder, and started wearing androgynous clothes. We did not agree to the binder, let her wear whatever sports bras she felt comfortable with, supported her with everything else.

She’s 16 now and wears a bikini to the pool and identifies as a girl.

I wouldn’t rush into anything permanent unless you are sure sure sure, like your kid has identified as a boy from a very young age. This was a phase for our dd.

I am OP. I’m totally open to this happening this way. I’m really only asking about bras. People here are very reactive thinking I’m asking about more. I’ve been pretty clear about what we are asking. It’s amazing how many people want to turn it into more. As if I’m scheduling my 11 year old for surgery.

Mine were larger than that at her age, and there’s something to be said about teaching acceptance. You can buy many different bras and let her decide what works best, but taking a step back and teaching acceptance really does something long term that a bra can’t do. As for a binder, I had several friends/roommates over the years that wore them and their breasts looked terrible without them even after just a few years of daily wear. I wouldn’t take that step for her unless she approached you about it and definitely not if she’s still growing. For now buy a few sports bras, get a minimizing bra, underwire, no underwire, etc and let her figure it out. Buying shirts a size bigger, nothing see through, cami layers, hoodies, etc might help too. She’ll grow into herself it just takes time.

[Anonymous]

My well endowed 15 year old has been wearing a binder off and on for a couple of years. When I got the first binder I ordered it a size or two bigger than the size chart so it wouldn’t compress too much but allow my kid a sense of control on what they were wearing. It’s really just a tank top that has a fairly stiff front layer and not much stretch. I ordered from GC2B. We did not allow them to wear it every day or for longer than 8 hours at a time. Tomboyx is also a good brand.
I suggest first getting a high quality sports bra and see if they like it and if helps and if not explore binders.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My well endowed 15 year old has been wearing a binder off and on for a couple of years. When I got the first binder I ordered it a size or two bigger than the size chart so it wouldn’t compress too much but allow my kid a sense of control on what they were wearing. It’s really just a tank top that has a fairly stiff front layer and not much stretch. I ordered from GC2B. We did not allow them to wear it every day or for longer than 8 hours at a time. Tomboyx is also a good brand.
I suggest first getting a high quality sports bra and see if they like it and if helps and if not explore binders.

Yikes! She’s going to end up with flat, saggy breasts before she’s 25.