Did you feel like you would never get pregnant but still got a BFP?

[Anonymous]

After trying metformin, clomid, tamoxifen, IUIs and a few IVFs i have really lost hope of ever getting pregnant. I just can't even imagine getting that call after bloodwork saying I'm pregnant, or seeing a positive on a pregnancy test. In the beginning of this struggle I read so many success stories for each thing i tried. I thought metformin would work with the OBGYN, then clomid. I then switched to an RE and had several diagnostics and went on to try tamoxifen and IUIs as well as cycling through two IVFs with him. I had so much hope and thought my first IVF would work, it was a huge blow when it didn't. I added in accupunture for my second cycle, had better results but still no pregnancy. I have changed clinics and am waiting on CCS testing and to gear up for my frozen transfer. Success rates were good at my old clinic and at my new, but I just feel like I'm going through the motions with no end in site. Did any of you feel like this and still get a BFP?? I feel like I'm destined to never be pregnant and hope its just me being at a low point and not that its the reality, i feel like I can not dig myself out of this hole. Would love to hear success stories after a few failed cycles, especially when you REALLY REALLY felt like it was not going to happen, because that is how I feel at this point.

[Anonymous]

((((OP))))) I could have written this. I know just how you feel. I often wonder if I am sabotaging myself by feeling hopeless. Then I get worried about that! I wish you luck, and success, soon!

[Anonymous]

Same here. I am wondering if I am wasting my timke energy and money. Hang in there. Just remeber to try not to let it take over your life.

[Anonymous]

I wish you all the best of luck. I used to be part of many forums and be very obsessed about it but then slowly all my forum "friends" got their BFPs and I was left in the dust. I wouldnt wish this upon any one and am so happy for all of them, but it just made me feel more miserable and isolated. I am posting on a forum after awhile just to see if anyone can relate, and hoping that they came out of it with a great outcome. I def try not to obsess too much, i dont think i have anything left to google really...just sometimes you feel you hit rock bottom and need someone to tell you they were there and got through it. I hope you both get great news soon!

[Anonymous]

I think that there are but they don't come back here. Best of luck to everyone. Keep the faith.

[Anonymous]

Yes! I have been there. Trying for a year on our own, two failed IUIs, one failed IVF, then the second IVF worked. We're in our early/mid 30s, no issues have been diagnosed other than mild MFI. I realize some people (including you) have been through even more than that, but I know how hard of a blow it is when an IVF cycle does not work. Since then I have had several failed FETs trying for #2 but I haven't given up hope yet. My RE told me that sometimes you just have to keep on trying. I was so discouraged before my second IVF cycle but the thought of not trying again was just not a possibility for me; I could not even go there mentally. It sounds totally corny and pollyanna, but with that second cycle I basically forced myself to get into a good place mentally and I did my best to push all of those negative thoughts out of my head. Maybe that helped and maybe it didn't, but that was the one and only cycle so far that has worked for me. Best of luck to you.

[Anonymous]

Hang in there. 3 +years - clomid, 4 IUIs, 1 laparoscopy, 1 appendectomy, 2 NCIVFs, 1 IVF, 1 FET, adoption homestudy approved, immune testing and IVF #2 and currently 11 weeks pregnant on stimulated IVF #2. I had lost hope...and am still scared I'll wake up and this won't be real. This has been/is the hardest thing I've ever gone through. The thing that helped me was reminding myself that this was a temporary time in my life- that at some point things would be resolved. Hugs to you.

[Anonymous]

Thank you so much for the responses...sometimes you just need to hear from people that can relate...and especially ones that have really been there and gotten through it. I also did have a laporascopy and checking for tubes to be clear, then read stories of success and being more fertile after, same with a endometrial biopsy...i guess hope comes and goes, its hard to deal with failure after failure and scary to get your hopes up. Sorry for all you have been through but glad to hear you have gotten through it. Best of luck on your pregnancies and future!

[Anonymous]

Well, we were told I would never get pregnant without IVF/ICSI, after having done 5 IUIs. I have PCOS and my husband has severe MFI. The RE really pushed us to do IVF, but we chose adoption instead. Three months after we brought our daughter home, I got pregnant quite by surprise. It happened during the most stressful time in my life too, in terms of adjusting to a new child and working 16 hour days. I was on Metformin at the time (to control my periods, as we weren't TTC) and had gotten a few sessions of acupuncture for chronic back pain in the preceding months to getting pregnant. Not sure if it was the acupuncture, the Met, or what. My husband went to a urologist for a 2nd opinion, and the guy basically laughed and said that if we kept trying, he thought I'd be pregnant within 2 years or so. He said that GW usually is overly strict with morphology results (DH's were 1-2%). Who knows?

Good luck to you all!

[Anonymous]

That really gives me some hope as I have PCOS and husband has antibodies (this was a new diagnosis after 2 years so not too sure what that even means at this point) congrats on your pregnancy and adoption, i have looked into adoption but majority of countries i looked into we were too young! i def want to at some point though and will look into it more once i am through these cycles. hope you stay blessed and continue to build your family

[Anonymous]

Yes, I was deeply worried it would never happen, even though I did not *want* to loose hope completely.
I remember reading 'Waiting for Daisy' in the beginning of TTC, and I never ever thought all that would happen to me, but it did!
But now our baby is here! For us also, the successful cycle was during an insanely stressful time, so stressful that I almost quit in the midst of it, because it was just all too much, and I saw no chance of success. We were already discussing our next cycle/attempt. I even had forgotten I was in my 2 wk wait, and only remembered when I felt AF coming! Only that was not AF at all!!!
Don't loose hope!

[Anonymous]

Thank you, and congrats! Love hearing these type of stories

[Anonymous]

Yes...my last IVF cycle...I had totally lost hope. We were going to do donor eggs (even had donor picked out and a start date 2 months from the end of my last IVF cycle).

We did:
TTC#1
10 months on our own at age 28-29
IUI #1=BFN
1 IVF= 1st Kid (got pregnant at 29, had kid at 30)

TTC#2
3 clomid cycles= BFN (started at age 31)
FET with leftover embryos from IVF #1=BFN
IVF #2=BFN
IVF #3=BFN
IUI #2=BFN
IVF #4=finally pregnant (got pregnant at 32, had kid at 33)

[Anonymous]

PS--this is the poster that got pregnant on 4th IVF for 2nd kid.


I HATE when people say that their positive thinking got them pregnant. My RE once told me that if the power of positive or negative thinking could impact whether or not you got pregnant...there would be fewer abortions. Your mind can't control your fertility. To think so puts unrealistic pressure on you. You will get pregnant if you can get pregnant. You won't get pregnant if you can't (bad eggs/sperm/genes/immune issues/uterine issues/implantation issues). Your mind can't control those issues. Can people THINK themselves out of having diabetes? cancer? heart disease? THIS is why we need to move away from a MORAL attitude about fertility. Fertility and infertility is a DISEASE (within the limitations of natural human aging).

Good luck to you.

[Anonymous]

PP, I love this:
"Can people THINK themselves out of having diabetes? cancer? heart disease?"
I sometimes worry if a quarter cup of coffee or exercising will wreck my chances, and then I ask myself, "well, could anyone rely on coffee and running as birth control when they don't want a pregnancy?" Of course not.