Crazy shit your parents did

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I forget where I read it, but I read that back in the day, like pioneering times - they used to just tie toddlers to a post outside while the parents went to work out in the fields. Point being, we've come a long way.

Yep. I heard this is why France has their awesome daycare system now. Mothers had to tie kids to beds while they went to work. It made everyone miserable, so they started the public daycares because moms who feel better work better.

It wasn't uncommon, but it was much more common to have a relative watch your children. Your little sister or your cousin's daughter or your oldest child would watch your younger child while you were working on the farm.

[Anonymous]

80s kid. I had minimal parental involvement. TV was my parent. My SAHM would complain that my extracurricular activities were too much of an inconvenience for her.

I was quite talented in the performing arts and won regional competitions and scholarships but eventually quit them all because I couldn't deal with my family constantly guilt tripping me over the fact that they didn't want to go to my performances (inconvenience... they'd rather watch TV at home).

As a pre-teen, I was guilt-tripped for getting scholarships to science summer camps. I always applied for scholarships because I knew they'd never be willing to pay for it... but they were willing to pay for their 5 cars.

Anyway, they were just really selfish parents. Ironically, they were very warm and kind externally but they thought that the child's life should revolve around their parents. Parents had no duty to their children. My parents interpreted my ambition as a rejection of them as parents (again, everything revolved around them).

I no longer speak with them and I'm very happy. I make a point of being supportive and involved in my child's life but I have to be careful not to overcompensate for my childhood.

[Anonymous]

My mom went back to work when I was in 5th grade. She was an accountant at a CPA firm so tax season was full of long hours. We lived off of prepared food during tax season -- beef stew, chow mein, Kraft mac and cheese, and frozen pot pies were my standards. So much salt....

[Anonymous]

There was a neighborhood car pool for our Catholic school. My mom had a station wagon and another mom had a van, but the third mom just had a pick-up truck. 6 or 7 kids would pile in the back of her pick-up truck and she would give us a ride home. I loved riding in the back of her truck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:80s kid. I had minimal parental involvement. TV was my parent. My SAHM would complain that my extracurricular activities were too much of an inconvenience for her.

I was quite talented in the performing arts and won regional competitions and scholarships but eventually quit them all because I couldn't deal with my family constantly guilt tripping me over the fact that they didn't want to go to my performances (inconvenience... they'd rather watch TV at home).

As a pre-teen, I was guilt-tripped for getting scholarships to science summer camps. I always applied for scholarships because I knew they'd never be willing to pay for it... but they were willing to pay for their 5 cars.

Anyway, they were just really selfish parents. Ironically, they were very warm and kind externally but they thought that the child's life should revolve around their parents. Parents had no duty to their children. My parents interpreted my ambition as a rejection of them as parents (again, everything revolved around them).

I no longer speak with them and I'm very happy. I make a point of being supportive and involved in my child's life but I have to be careful not to overcompensate for my childhood.

I qualified for a pre-Olympic team but I had to quit because my mom didn't feel like driving me. She was also a SAHM.

[Anonymous]

A lot of people mention the smoking...when we went to Paris this summer I saw many a parent smoking over their infant's head.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom would leave me in a playpen outside in the yard by myself at age 2. Once it collapsed on me (it was the kind you stretched out) and I was stuck inside it like a taquito for what seemed like forever.

My dad used to let me drive the car on his lap at around age 6 or 7.

My parents didn't pick me up from a swim meet. After waiting for an hour and a half, the coach drove me home. There was a note on the dining room table that they went to Boston for the weekend and they left a $20 bill. I was 9. I did have an older brother but he just left to his friends house. My brother would leave me home alone very frequently when he was supposed to be baby sitting me.

Truly disturbing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:


She also left me in cars while she ran errands when I was very young....and beat me with wooden spoons and hair brushes....but I think that was fairly typical 70's parenting from what I have read here.

No.

I agree - typical 70s (at least for me!!!). Common for my childhood- all of this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Grew up on hippie commune, so many things.

Many blistering sunburns and at least one sun poisoning and trip to the ER for sunburn.

If neighbor's dog barked too much at night, my dad would go out onto the deck naked and blow off a couple rounds of his shotgun.

Parents had many parties that went late into the night. Lots of pot. Usually included naked floating and drinking on innertubes on the pond. I watched Saturday Night Live in the bedroom while the adults yelled and screamed and danced and partied. Too much noise and loud Rolling Stones to sleep. Can remember the revelers singing "send me dead flowers" at the top of their lungs. Sometimes look at my own social life and envy theirs. They are still close friends with these people in their 70s.

They grew pot in our garden.

I played in the creek or by the pond for hours, or even all day, alone. I saw a lot of snakes and had a very rich fantasy fairy life down by the creek.

I traveled from the west coast to the east coast in the back of a pickup truck with the dog, with a flimsy fiberglass camper top on the top. We slept back there. We had a blanket.

I remember the day I heard the "n" word at preschool. I came home and said it and my mom slapped me across the face.

Many other stories but I'm afraid I would out myself.

What did your parents and their friends do for a living? And how do they live now? Still hippues?

My parents, very middle /upper middle class Catholic, conservative, had a close group of friends they partied with all the time, and are still friends with today in their 70s. I'm kind of envious of it too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom would leave me in a playpen outside in the yard by myself at age 2. Once it collapsed on me (it was the kind you stretched out) and I was stuck inside it like a taquito for what seemed like forever.

My dad used to let me drive the car on his lap at around age 6 or 7.

My parents didn't pick me up from a swim meet. After waiting for an hour and a half, the coach drove me home. There was a note on the dining room table that they went to Boston for the weekend and they left a $20 bill. I was 9. I did have an older brother but he just left to his friends house. My brother would leave me home alone very frequently when he was supposed to be baby sitting me.

Truly disturbing.

I thought the same thing.

[Anonymous]

This thread is amazing. I don't have anything to contribute, but all of your stories are fascinating, hilarious, sad...

[Anonymous]

My mom hit us more than a few times. I have a vivid memory of her covering my facial bruises with base make-up before my swim team awards banquet at our country club.
I think of incidents like this often, because I know these habits run in families. And my 11 year old pushes my buttons. But I just go into another room and shut the door. I don't ever want to hit him, and I don't ever have the urge. I hope it stays that way. If it doesn't I would get help right away

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:


She also left me in cars while she ran errands when I was very young....and beat me with wooden spoons and hair brushes....but I think that was fairly typical 70's parenting from what I have read here.

No.

I agree - typical 70s (at least for me!!!). Common for my childhood- all of this.

Yep. All these things were common for me and my friends in the 70's-80's!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Reading these make me sad for two reasons:

2. Others make me sad for the younger generations with childhoods that are so managed that even how they have fun during "free time" is dictated. I know they don't know any other way but it's sad to think they'll never have stories or some of these memories.

Trust me, there are still people having babies on communes and doing all neglectful stuff to their kids.
You just don't see those types of people living in UMC, tony suburbs of Montgomery County and posting on DCUM. That type of weirdness just doesn't exist here. Once you get outside the 6 figure, post secondary degree, professional set outside DC (and other major metro areas) you'll get a lot more of this stuff. Kids still play with BB guns, ride dirt bikes, go get in trouble all day long during summer breaks, etc.

The issue is that you no longer associate with those types of people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Trust me, there are still people having babies on communes and doing all neglectful stuff to their kids.
You just don't see those types of people living in UMC, tony suburbs of Montgomery County and posting on DCUM. That type of weirdness just doesn't exist here. Once you get outside the 6 figure, post secondary degree, professional set outside DC (and other major metro areas) you'll get a lot more of this stuff. Kids still play with BB guns, ride dirt bikes, go get in trouble all day long during summer breaks, etc.

The issue is that you no longer associate with those types of people.

+1. I belonge to two separate online parenting forums (one for each kid). The upside is that you get to hear about what goes on in families' lives when they live nowhere nearby (often abroad); for example, one of the women on one board lives in Belgium. Her stories about preschool--where the teachers take the kids to the ocean for an overnight trip, made me feel simultaneously jealous (because that would never fly in FCPS) and annoyed with myself for immediately thinking it sounded too dangerous. The downside is you read threads where a kid is obviously struggling in s bunch of areas and its apparent some major developmental milestones are missing. The mom is completely asleep at the wheel, no one has a job or health insurance and they're all hoping grandma's settlement check will arrive soon so they'll at least have some food in the house and be able to pay the rent.