S/O - Why does DCUM hate this kind of woman so much?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Spinoff from this thread in Beauty and Fashion.

TL/DR - A woman is miffed that her recently laid off cousin showed up at Thanksgiving looking nice. Too nice. She cites the woman's Cartier Love bracelet and VCA necklace as evidence that the cousin was obnoxiously "dripping" in designer goods. Posters rightly pointed out that the woman only had a few designer items on and OP likely only noticed them because she was jealous and wanted them herself. Shockingly, OP has not returned. (https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1242233.page)

But here's what I'm really curious about. Someone posted this:

This may be an unpopular opinion but I like basic rich suburban mom style. It’s not me but give me a highlighted hair, nails done, lulu wearing soccer mom with Cartier bangles and a van cleef arpel necklace any day. You know it’s not unique and you don’t feel like you need to prove you are interesting with what you are wearing. I say, get it girl. Grab your neverfull and pick up those kiddos from soccer practice.

Why does DCUM hate this woman so much? I think the whole "I prefer a WASPier aesthetic" thing is just pretext. Because she's happy to lean in to conventional design aesthetics? Is it because this woman is competition for higher value men? I just don't get it.

Dcum women hate this but men love it

What - men like 20 year olds with hot bodies? Why didn't anyone tell me???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because DCUM (the people who use it, not the site itself) hates women! It's just a reflection of our society

women dominate (by a large margin) this site, sooo...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It just comes off as so basic and materialistic. Too each her own, but just not my kind of person.

LOl and juvenile. OP you sound young....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're looking for a male perspective? Men don't care about your jewelry and most of us don't know a $20 handbag from a $1,000 designer purse. We do notice your clothes, heels, figure, face, eyes and attitude. Wear that crap to impress, or piss off your women friends. We don't care.

Actually we do all kinds of things all day that aren’t about trying to get you to want to f$& us! It’s amazing to think about.

Why are you attacking me? The OP posted this asking for a Male's perspective. So of course almost all the replies are from women. I'll say it again. As a man, we think that any women who pays thousands of $ for purse is an idiot as we hate purses in general. Same for your expensive jewelry. It's just baubles that you purchased and it doesn't do anything to heighten your status anymore than the car I drove up in, or the watch I'm wearing does for me.

You would hate purses in general? What a weird comment.

Oh trust me, all men hate your purse. If a woman can go out without a damn purse, she is a real keeper to me.

+100 Has a man ever complimented you on your purse? It doesn't happen.

I mean, I can see why men hate those old lady purses where you carry everything but the kitchen sink. But as someone who didn’t carry a purse until I had kids, I don’t buy it. It’s one of those things men complain about but find kind of feminizing.

My husband despises my purse because when we are out I ask him to hold it for me while I go to the bathroom and he HATES this😂. This has caused complete enmity between him and my purse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Spinoff from this thread in Beauty and Fashion.

TL/DR - A woman is miffed that her recently laid off cousin showed up at Thanksgiving looking nice. Too nice. She cites the woman's Cartier Love bracelet and VCA necklace as evidence that the cousin was obnoxiously "dripping" in designer goods. Posters rightly pointed out that the woman only had a few designer items on and OP likely only noticed them because she was jealous and wanted them herself. Shockingly, OP has not returned. (https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1242233.page)

But here's what I'm really curious about. Someone posted this:

This may be an unpopular opinion but I like basic rich suburban mom style. It’s not me but give me a highlighted hair, nails done, lulu wearing soccer mom with Cartier bangles and a van cleef arpel necklace any day. You know it’s not unique and you don’t feel like you need to prove you are interesting with what you are wearing. I say, get it girl. Grab your neverfull and pick up those kiddos from soccer practice.

Why does DCUM hate this woman so much? I think the whole "I prefer a WASPier aesthetic" thing is just pretext. Because she's happy to lean in to conventional design aesthetics? Is it because this woman is competition for higher value men? I just don't get it.

Dcum women hate this but men love it

What - men like 20 year olds with hot bodies? Why didn't anyone tell me???

Heather is 37. She’s not much younger than the 40 something’s everyone is talking about.

[Anonymous]

In my experience, I have not found that unique style choices are any indication that a person is especially unique or interesting or that basic style choices indicate a person is boring. Some people just want something nice and don’t want shop and research. So they reach for the popular nice thing.

Personally, I've been suffering for years because i want a neverfull but i feel like I should get something more unique. I am jealous of the women buying the popular designer items who aren’t wasting their time thinking about how they need to buy something else to show they aren’t basic. It’s so dumb.

[Anonymous]

Those purchases are an easy way to fit in with a specific community. Some of those women can afford it, some are going into debt. There's no way to know.
I personally like a more artsy, laid back vibe. I like seeing original style and unique personality choices. These sorts of outfits are interesting and visually appealing.
But, I totally get that some women don't have the time, energy, or confidence to pull off their own look. Hence, the UMC uniform.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Spinoff from this thread in Beauty and Fashion.

TL/DR - A woman is miffed that her recently laid off cousin showed up at Thanksgiving looking nice. Too nice. She cites the woman's Cartier Love bracelet and VCA necklace as evidence that the cousin was obnoxiously "dripping" in designer goods. Posters rightly pointed out that the woman only had a few designer items on and OP likely only noticed them because she was jealous and wanted them herself. Shockingly, OP has not returned. (https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1242233.page)

But here's what I'm really curious about. Someone posted this:

This may be an unpopular opinion but I like basic rich suburban mom style. It’s not me but give me a highlighted hair, nails done, lulu wearing soccer mom with Cartier bangles and a van cleef arpel necklace any day. You know it’s not unique and you don’t feel like you need to prove you are interesting with what you are wearing. I say, get it girl. Grab your neverfull and pick up those kiddos from soccer practice.

Why does DCUM hate this woman so much? I think the whole "I prefer a WASPier aesthetic" thing is just pretext. Because she's happy to lean in to conventional design aesthetics? Is it because this woman is competition for higher value men? I just don't get it.

Dcum women hate this but men love it

What - men like 20 year olds with hot bodies? Why didn't anyone tell me???

Heather is 37. She’s not much younger than the 40 something’s everyone is talking about.

Good for her - she looks great.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my experience, I have not found that unique style choices are any indication that a person is especially unique or interesting or that basic style choices indicate a person is boring. Some people just want something nice and don’t want shop and research. So they reach for the popular nice thing.

Personally, I've been suffering for years because i want a neverfull but i feel like I should get something more unique. I am jealous of the women buying the popular designer items who aren’t wasting their time thinking about how they need to buy something else to show they aren’t basic. It’s so dumb.

JFC. DCUM is exhausting.

[Anonymous]

DH hates my purse because he can never find anything in it. Until he needs something like Advil or a band aid and I have it right there. He admits this is nonsensical but the guy is right men generally hate purses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those purchases are an easy way to fit in with a specific community. Some of those women can afford it, some are going into debt. There's no way to know.
I personally like a more artsy, laid back vibe. I like seeing original style and unique personality choices. These sorts of outfits are interesting and visually appealing.
But, I totally get that some women don't have the time, energy, or confidence to pull off their own look. Hence, the UMC uniform.

Which specific community?

I guess I am curious what this specific look is supposed to signal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Those purchases are an easy way to fit in with a specific community. Some of those women can afford it, some are going into debt. There's no way to know.
I personally like a more artsy, laid back vibe. I like seeing original style and unique personality choices. These sorts of outfits are interesting and visually appealing.
But, I totally get that some women don't have the time, energy, or confidence to pull off their own look. Hence, the UMC uniform.

Which specific community?

I guess I am curious what this specific look is supposed to signal.

^1

[Anonymous]

Because people are hateful and jelly. Duh

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think women dress like this to signal style and sophistication. They dress like this to signal something; in upper middle class suburbia a lot of safe boring moms adhere to these particular labels and items to visual communicate that they are a. well to do b. aware of the trends and c. fit in.

This look says I am rich and have the disposable income to buy a few select designer items. I am not middle class, I am above middle class. The lulus say, a. I am fit and have the resources and time to devote to my thinness and b. I am rich so I don't mind spending $120 on luxury workout wear. The expensive processed hair says I am rich enough to afford maintenance of this type of hair.

This look does not signal style or taste; it an attempt at signaling wealth in UMC suburbia

Bingo. It's all about this.
If you have a gay male friend you'll get the unvarnished truth. A coworker said to me "I can tell by the way you talk that you grew up with money, but I can tell by the way you dress that you don't have any now. You wear cheap shoes and no jewelry." WOW THANKS!

[Anonymous]

Curating eclectic style choices takes time and that is the luxury a lot of suburban moms don’t have thus just get what everyone else gets.