Does anyone on Capitol Hill send their kid to an elementary in upper NW?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let's also be honest about the fact that fewer and fewer families will get into Basis and Latin I and II since more students are applying. And with families also leaving TR for MS IB schools are getting more attractive. We never got into any of these MS via the lottery and are at our IB and my kid loves it.

I don't think math and numbers work the way you think they do. Same number of kids will get in, regardless of how many apply. Percentage may change, but # of available seats is not impacted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am sure Eastern and SH/EH work great for some parents.

The same cannot be said for black and Hispanic kids, especially those in sped.

I’m happy for all of us when local schools work out, but I find it disgusting when loudmouthed parents try to shame others for making different choices.

This happened to me with my kids, and I was so disgusted by the blatant clout seeking behavior of my neighbor. Make your school choices on behalf of your kids, not yourself.

I haven’t seen any posts in this thread shaming anyone for their school choices, so I’m not sure why you brought this up here in particular.

In fact, most of the shaming I see on DCUM in general tends to be in the opposite direction, with parents who didn’t choose their in-bound school shaming those of us who did. For example, some say (or strongly imply) that we don’t care as much about our education, that our kids must not be as high achieving as theirs, etc.

That’s the kind of crap I am “disgusted” by.

You've identified a fundamental truth on DCUM: Posters who lecture others about the "wrongness" of their choices who play the martyr card whenever anyone dares express they like a school the DCUM Martyr Police sh*t upon. In their worlds, saying "I chose my IB MS and I like it" is somehow interpreted as "pressuring them" or 'being high and mighty". I haven't seen anyone on this thread judge anyone else for choosing a charter or private school. I have seen multiple instances of people like the poster to whom you responded excoriating people for daring to suggest they like their IB school and/or that people might want to give them a chance.

-Signed
Someone who sent their kids to charters but doesn't begrudge or judge parents who made a different choice

I am not going to go back and re read every post but I think you’re right. I personally don’t judge people for going to their inbound. If your school is working for you/your kid, especially if it’s your inbound- excellent. But I think the entire point of this thread was people who are choosing discomfort (long drives) so they can send their kids elsewhere.

Also in real life I think no one would dare to tell anyone they’re making a poor choice in sending their kids to their inbound. I would be shocked if I heard someone say that anyway. But what I have heard many times is people virtue signaling by judging those who choose to send their kids to charters. I’ve certainly had the deranged neighbor tell me how I’m racist or something (Always a white lady btw) for not choosing our inbound.

In an ideal world all the schools would be considered great and people would spend less energy judging the choices you make about your kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also, there is a lot of self-righteousness associated with sending kids to any public MS or HS on the Hill. It is great when you learn that the ones who are so smug about sending their kids to Hill MS have plans to go private for HS all along. For our family, private was not an option financially so it made sense to leave DCPS starting in MS. If we knew we'd be going private starting in 9th anyhow, I'd feel much much more comfortable with a Hill DCPS MS (and supplementing if necessary).

It will be interesting to see how the increased competitiveness of privates changes this group’s behavior. Without being smug, we always planned private for HS but are moving our child to private for K after seeing the competitiveness of private admissions increase in the last few years. We still live on the Hill but are totally bypassing DCPS, although our original plan was public elementary. Some of those parents waiting until high school for private may not have that option to wait, or their kids may not get in anywhere (or anywhere they think is worth the money).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also, there is a lot of self-righteousness associated with sending kids to any public MS or HS on the Hill. It is great when you learn that the ones who are so smug about sending their kids to Hill MS have plans to go private for HS all along. For our family, private was not an option financially so it made sense to leave DCPS starting in MS. If we knew we'd be going private starting in 9th anyhow, I'd feel much much more comfortable with a Hill DCPS MS (and supplementing if necessary).

It will be interesting to see how the increased competitiveness of privates changes this group’s behavior. Without being smug, we always planned private for HS but are moving our child to private for K after seeing the competitiveness of private admissions increase in the last few years. We still live on the Hill but are totally bypassing DCPS, although our original plan was public elementary. Some of those parents waiting until high school for private may not have that option to wait, or their kids may not get in anywhere (or anywhere they think is worth the money).

They'll move or send their kids to a DCPS application school (if they get in.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am sure Eastern and SH/EH work great for some parents.

The same cannot be said for black and Hispanic kids, especially those in sped.

I’m happy for all of us when local schools work out, but I find it disgusting when loudmouthed parents try to shame others for making different choices.

This happened to me with my kids, and I was so disgusted by the blatant clout seeking behavior of my neighbor. Make your school choices on behalf of your kids, not yourself.

I haven’t seen any posts in this thread shaming anyone for their school choices, so I’m not sure why you brought this up here in particular.

In fact, most of the shaming I see on DCUM in general tends to be in the opposite direction, with parents who didn’t choose their in-bound school shaming those of us who did. For example, some say (or strongly imply) that we don’t care as much about our education, that our kids must not be as high achieving as theirs, etc.

That’s the kind of crap I am “disgusted” by.

You've identified a fundamental truth on DCUM: Posters who lecture others about the "wrongness" of their choices who play the martyr card whenever anyone dares express they like a school the DCUM Martyr Police sh*t upon. In their worlds, saying "I chose my IB MS and I like it" is somehow interpreted as "pressuring them" or 'being high and mighty". I haven't seen anyone on this thread judge anyone else for choosing a charter or private school. I have seen multiple instances of people like the poster to whom you responded excoriating people for daring to suggest they like their IB school and/or that people might want to give them a chance.

-Signed
Someone who sent their kids to charters but doesn't begrudge or judge parents who made a different choice

I am not going to go back and re read every post but I think you’re right. I personally don’t judge people for going to their inbound. If your school is working for you/your kid, especially if it’s your inbound- excellent. But I think the entire point of this thread was people who are choosing discomfort (long drives) so they can send their kids elsewhere.

Also in real life I think no one would dare to tell anyone they’re making a poor choice in sending their kids to their inbound. I would be shocked if I heard someone say that anyway. But what I have heard many times is people virtue signaling by judging those who choose to send their kids to charters. I’ve certainly had the deranged neighbor tell me how I’m racist or something (Always a white lady btw) for not choosing our inbound.

In an ideal world all the schools would be considered great and people would spend less energy judging the choices you make about your kids.

Your neighbor is upset with you because she perceives your choice to send your child to a charter as directly impacting the quality of the IB school, and thus the quality of options available to her. It's not judgment from a neutral place, it's coming from an acknowledgment that choices are interconnected.

I'm not saying it's okay for her to express her anger with you in a way that makes you uncomfortable, or to claim that your choice of school is driven by anything other than your interest in your child's education. Not endorsing that. But surely you understand that when people express frustration with IB families who go elsewhere, it is largely driven by a recognition that where your neighbors send their kids to school impacts the quality of the IB school and therefore impacts you?

I think the PP is very right that often people see implied judgment in the choice to send your kids IB. And I also think you are right that people do judge parents who send their kids to charters. But what is missing is the understanding that this judgment is not coming from this neutral place where you are just looking at someone else's choice that has nothing to do with you and passing judgment. People in DC judge each others school choices because of the way those choices impact schools and the community. I think we should all be more upfront about that because it's the elephant in the room a lot of the time.

(We don't go to our IB school, by the way. But I don't get upset when neighbors sometimes act judgmental towards us for this choice because I fully understand where that is coming from, and in fact I also felt that way at times when we WERE at the IB school. All compounded by the fact that often the person who is judging you is someone who tried to get a lottery seat at the school your kids do attend, but was not as lucky as you. These are all things you need to remember and to try to have empathy when you encounter these conversations.)

[Anonymous]

i also think a lot of families on the hill are insecure re their middle school options and choice no matter what it is. the test scores and past reputation at the in-bound schools are not good. meanwhile the national political sentiment and a lot if the academic research focused on charter schools has swung much less positive. there is research that says branding a charter school as for example classics focused tends to be less appealing to lower income families. that kind of raises a lot of really uncomfortable questions for some people. are you commuting across town partly to avoid that demographic. its obviously a lot more complicated than that. i think most people weigh all the various factors as well as their particular children and come out slightly more one way or the other. but its not an easy conversation to have with other parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am sure Eastern and SH/EH work great for some parents.

The same cannot be said for black and Hispanic kids, especially those in sped.

I’m happy for all of us when local schools work out, but I find it disgusting when loudmouthed parents try to shame others for making different choices.

This happened to me with my kids, and I was so disgusted by the blatant clout seeking behavior of my neighbor. Make your school choices on behalf of your kids, not yourself.

I haven’t seen any posts in this thread shaming anyone for their school choices, so I’m not sure why you brought this up here in particular.

In fact, most of the shaming I see on DCUM in general tends to be in the opposite direction, with parents who didn’t choose their in-bound school shaming those of us who did. For example, some say (or strongly imply) that we don’t care as much about our education, that our kids must not be as high achieving as theirs, etc.

That’s the kind of crap I am “disgusted” by.

You've identified a fundamental truth on DCUM: Posters who lecture others about the "wrongness" of their choices who play the martyr card whenever anyone dares express they like a school the DCUM Martyr Police sh*t upon. In their worlds, saying "I chose my IB MS and I like it" is somehow interpreted as "pressuring them" or 'being high and mighty". I haven't seen anyone on this thread judge anyone else for choosing a charter or private school. I have seen multiple instances of people like the poster to whom you responded excoriating people for daring to suggest they like their IB school and/or that people might want to give them a chance.

-Signed
Someone who sent their kids to charters but doesn't begrudge or judge parents who made a different choice

I am not going to go back and re read every post but I think you’re right. I personally don’t judge people for going to their inbound. If your school is working for you/your kid, especially if it’s your inbound- excellent. But I think the entire point of this thread was people who are choosing discomfort (long drives) so they can send their kids elsewhere.

Also in real life I think no one would dare to tell anyone they’re making a poor choice in sending their kids to their inbound. I would be shocked if I heard someone say that anyway. But what I have heard many times is people virtue signaling by judging those who choose to send their kids to charters. I’ve certainly had the deranged neighbor tell me how I’m racist or something (Always a white lady btw) for not choosing our inbound.

In an ideal world all the schools would be considered great and people would spend less energy judging the choices you make about your kids.

Your neighbor is upset with you because she perceives your choice to send your child to a charter as directly impacting the quality of the IB school, and thus the quality of options available to her. It's not judgment from a neutral place, it's coming from an acknowledgment that choices are interconnected.

I'm not saying it's okay for her to express her anger with you in a way that makes you uncomfortable, or to claim that your choice of school is driven by anything other than your interest in your child's education. Not endorsing that. But surely you understand that when people express frustration with IB families who go elsewhere, it is largely driven by a recognition that where your neighbors send their kids to school impacts the quality of the IB school and therefore impacts you?

I think the PP is very right that often people see implied judgment in the choice to send your kids IB. And I also think you are right that people do judge parents who send their kids to charters. But what is missing is the understanding that this judgment is not coming from this neutral place where you are just looking at someone else's choice that has nothing to do with you and passing judgment. People in DC judge each others school choices because of the way those choices impact schools and the community. I think we should all be more upfront about that because it's the elephant in the room a lot of the time.

(We don't go to our IB school, by the way. But I don't get upset when neighbors sometimes act judgmental towards us for this choice because I fully understand where that is coming from, and in fact I also felt that way at times when we WERE at the IB school. All compounded by the fact that often the person who is judging you is someone who tried to get a lottery seat at the school your kids do attend, but was not as lucky as you. These are all things you need to remember and to try to have empathy when you encounter these conversations.)

Eh. The judgment is obnoxious and counter-productive. Creating an atmosphere where you are not “allowed” to discuss charters for fear of progressive scorn has the opposite intended effect for me. It makes me not want to stick with DCPS if it had become a way for people to prove something political, or if discussion is shut down. The silence we were supposed to maintain during covid school closures made me allergic to that kind of social pressure, no matter how well meaning. I do wonder about why neighbors on my block chose charters instead of our excellent ES down the street, but more along the lines that they may not realize what the school is like.

[Anonymous]

is the judgment real or perceived? im guessing (maybe incorrectly) that this particular neighbor is an outspoken older woman who may not understand all the nuance

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:is the judgment real or perceived? im guessing (maybe incorrectly) that this particular neighbor is an outspoken older woman who may not understand all the nuance

The judgment is real and openly stated by a certain cadre.

[Anonymous]

interesting. i myself feel more peer pressure to go charter than stay in-bound

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am sure Eastern and SH/EH work great for some parents.

The same cannot be said for black and Hispanic kids, especially those in sped.

I’m happy for all of us when local schools work out, but I find it disgusting when loudmouthed parents try to shame others for making different choices.

This happened to me with my kids, and I was so disgusted by the blatant clout seeking behavior of my neighbor. Make your school choices on behalf of your kids, not yourself.

I haven’t seen any posts in this thread shaming anyone for their school choices, so I’m not sure why you brought this up here in particular.

In fact, most of the shaming I see on DCUM in general tends to be in the opposite direction, with parents who didn’t choose their in-bound school shaming those of us who did. For example, some say (or strongly imply) that we don’t care as much about our education, that our kids must not be as high achieving as theirs, etc.

That’s the kind of crap I am “disgusted” by.

You've identified a fundamental truth on DCUM: Posters who lecture others about the "wrongness" of their choices who play the martyr card whenever anyone dares express they like a school the DCUM Martyr Police sh*t upon. In their worlds, saying "I chose my IB MS and I like it" is somehow interpreted as "pressuring them" or 'being high and mighty". I haven't seen anyone on this thread judge anyone else for choosing a charter or private school. I have seen multiple instances of people like the poster to whom you responded excoriating people for daring to suggest they like their IB school and/or that people might want to give them a chance.

-Signed
Someone who sent their kids to charters but doesn't begrudge or judge parents who made a different choice

I am not going to go back and re read every post but I think you’re right. I personally don’t judge people for going to their inbound. If your school is working for you/your kid, especially if it’s your inbound- excellent. But I think the entire point of this thread was people who are choosing discomfort (long drives) so they can send their kids elsewhere.

Also in real life I think no one would dare to tell anyone they’re making a poor choice in sending their kids to their inbound. I would be shocked if I heard someone say that anyway. But what I have heard many times is people virtue signaling by judging those who choose to send their kids to charters. I’ve certainly had the deranged neighbor tell me how I’m racist or something (Always a white lady btw) for not choosing our inbound.

In an ideal world all the schools would be considered great and people would spend less energy judging the choices you make about your kids.

Your neighbor is upset with you because she perceives your choice to send your child to a charter as directly impacting the quality of the IB school, and thus the quality of options available to her. It's not judgment from a neutral place, it's coming from an acknowledgment that choices are interconnected.

I'm not saying it's okay for her to express her anger with you in a way that makes you uncomfortable, or to claim that your choice of school is driven by anything other than your interest in your child's education. Not endorsing that. But surely you understand that when people express frustration with IB families who go elsewhere, it is largely driven by a recognition that where your neighbors send their kids to school impacts the quality of the IB school and therefore impacts you?

I think the PP is very right that often people see implied judgment in the choice to send your kids IB. And I also think you are right that people do judge parents who send their kids to charters. But what is missing is the understanding that this judgment is not coming from this neutral place where you are just looking at someone else's choice that has nothing to do with you and passing judgment. People in DC judge each others school choices because of the way those choices impact schools and the community. I think we should all be more upfront about that because it's the elephant in the room a lot of the time.

(We don't go to our IB school, by the way. But I don't get upset when neighbors sometimes act judgmental towards us for this choice because I fully understand where that is coming from, and in fact I also felt that way at times when we WERE at the IB school. All compounded by the fact that often the person who is judging you is someone who tried to get a lottery seat at the school your kids do attend, but was not as lucky as you. These are all things you need to remember and to try to have empathy when you encounter these conversations.)

Well in our case it was our neighborhood crazy white savior who called us, a brown family, racist for choosing a bilingual charter so our kids could learn our heritage language. Think Joe Weedon sanctimommy type.

Our local elementary is oversubscribed. I understand that she might feel insecure, but as an adult you learn to not make others pay for your insecurities.

And no i don’t think that I am costing our inbound school anything by going to a charter school. Our middle school and high school, Eliot and Eastern, have horrendous track records when it comes to special needs kids. Our crazy neighbor has no idea of what special education is like for brown boys. And yet she feels okay to march her ugly bow legs over to our house and point fingers when she doesn’t understand. I will protect the privacy of my kids and I don’t need to explain myself to that thing, but I do think that people should be left alone to make choices for their kids. Not everyone is the same. Nor do I understand shaming people who attend their inbound!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:interesting. i myself feel more peer pressure to go charter than stay in-bound

Really???? That is super interesting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:is the judgment real or perceived? im guessing (maybe incorrectly) that this particular neighbor is an outspoken older woman who may not understand all the nuance

The judgment is real and openly stated by a certain cadre.

Well, she stood in front of me and stabbed her finger in my face and said “you need to send your kids to eastern- it’s full of other brown kids (yes this was said). You need to remember it’s a wonderful choice and you need to support your neighborhood school”

I was so shocked I didn’t know what to respond. She then preached how her children were also in special Ed and I had “no reason” to not enroll them.

Later I spoke to a neighbor who confirmed this women is crazy and has attacked others in a similar way.

I personally felt that here statement had a “listen here you dumb Latin person, let me explain to you what you are gonna do!” Tone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am sure Eastern and SH/EH work great for some parents.

The same cannot be said for black and Hispanic kids, especially those in sped.

I’m happy for all of us when local schools work out, but I find it disgusting when loudmouthed parents try to shame others for making different choices.

This happened to me with my kids, and I was so disgusted by the blatant clout seeking behavior of my neighbor. Make your school choices on behalf of your kids, not yourself.

I haven’t seen any posts in this thread shaming anyone for their school choices, so I’m not sure why you brought this up here in particular.

In fact, most of the shaming I see on DCUM in general tends to be in the opposite direction, with parents who didn’t choose their in-bound school shaming those of us who did. For example, some say (or strongly imply) that we don’t care as much about our education, that our kids must not be as high achieving as theirs, etc.

That’s the kind of crap I am “disgusted” by.

You've identified a fundamental truth on DCUM: Posters who lecture others about the "wrongness" of their choices who play the martyr card whenever anyone dares express they like a school the DCUM Martyr Police sh*t upon. In their worlds, saying "I chose my IB MS and I like it" is somehow interpreted as "pressuring them" or 'being high and mighty". I haven't seen anyone on this thread judge anyone else for choosing a charter or private school. I have seen multiple instances of people like the poster to whom you responded excoriating people for daring to suggest they like their IB school and/or that people might want to give them a chance.

-Signed
Someone who sent their kids to charters but doesn't begrudge or judge parents who made a different choice

I am not going to go back and re read every post but I think you’re right. I personally don’t judge people for going to their inbound. If your school is working for you/your kid, especially if it’s your inbound- excellent. But I think the entire point of this thread was people who are choosing discomfort (long drives) so they can send their kids elsewhere.

Also in real life I think no one would dare to tell anyone they’re making a poor choice in sending their kids to their inbound. I would be shocked if I heard someone say that anyway. But what I have heard many times is people virtue signaling by judging those who choose to send their kids to charters. I’ve certainly had the deranged neighbor tell me how I’m racist or something (Always a white lady btw) for not choosing our inbound.

In an ideal world all the schools would be considered great and people would spend less energy judging the choices you make about your kids.

Your neighbor is upset with you because she perceives your choice to send your child to a charter as directly impacting the quality of the IB school, and thus the quality of options available to her. It's not judgment from a neutral place, it's coming from an acknowledgment that choices are interconnected.

I'm not saying it's okay for her to express her anger with you in a way that makes you uncomfortable, or to claim that your choice of school is driven by anything other than your interest in your child's education. Not endorsing that. But surely you understand that when people express frustration with IB families who go elsewhere, it is largely driven by a recognition that where your neighbors send their kids to school impacts the quality of the IB school and therefore impacts you?

I think the PP is very right that often people see implied judgment in the choice to send your kids IB. And I also think you are right that people do judge parents who send their kids to charters. But what is missing is the understanding that this judgment is not coming from this neutral place where you are just looking at someone else's choice that has nothing to do with you and passing judgment. People in DC judge each others school choices because of the way those choices impact schools and the community. I think we should all be more upfront about that because it's the elephant in the room a lot of the time.

(We don't go to our IB school, by the way. But I don't get upset when neighbors sometimes act judgmental towards us for this choice because I fully understand where that is coming from, and in fact I also felt that way at times when we WERE at the IB school. All compounded by the fact that often the person who is judging you is someone who tried to get a lottery seat at the school your kids do attend, but was not as lucky as you. These are all things you need to remember and to try to have empathy when you encounter these conversations.)

Well in our case it was our neighborhood crazy white savior who called us, a brown family, racist for choosing a bilingual charter so our kids could learn our heritage language. Think Joe Weedon sanctimommy type.

Our local elementary is oversubscribed. I understand that she might feel insecure, but as an adult you learn to not make others pay for your insecurities.

And no i don’t think that I am costing our inbound school anything by going to a charter school. Our middle school and high school, Eliot and Eastern, have horrendous track records when it comes to special needs kids. Our crazy neighbor has no idea of what special education is like for brown boys. And yet she feels okay to march her ugly bow legs over to our house and point fingers when she doesn’t understand. I will protect the privacy of my kids and I don’t need to explain myself to that thing, but I do think that people should be left alone to make choices for their kids. Not everyone is the same. Nor do I understand shaming people who attend their inbound!

ugggg sorry to say I 100% believe you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am sure Eastern and SH/EH work great for some parents.

The same cannot be said for black and Hispanic kids, especially those in sped.

I’m happy for all of us when local schools work out, but I find it disgusting when loudmouthed parents try to shame others for making different choices.

This happened to me with my kids, and I was so disgusted by the blatant clout seeking behavior of my neighbor. Make your school choices on behalf of your kids, not yourself.

I haven’t seen any posts in this thread shaming anyone for their school choices, so I’m not sure why you brought this up here in particular.

In fact, most of the shaming I see on DCUM in general tends to be in the opposite direction, with parents who didn’t choose their in-bound school shaming those of us who did. For example, some say (or strongly imply) that we don’t care as much about our education, that our kids must not be as high achieving as theirs, etc.

That’s the kind of crap I am “disgusted” by.

You've identified a fundamental truth on DCUM: Posters who lecture others about the "wrongness" of their choices who play the martyr card whenever anyone dares express they like a school the DCUM Martyr Police sh*t upon. In their worlds, saying "I chose my IB MS and I like it" is somehow interpreted as "pressuring them" or 'being high and mighty". I haven't seen anyone on this thread judge anyone else for choosing a charter or private school. I have seen multiple instances of people like the poster to whom you responded excoriating people for daring to suggest they like their IB school and/or that people might want to give them a chance.

-Signed
Someone who sent their kids to charters but doesn't begrudge or judge parents who made a different choice

I am not going to go back and re read every post but I think you’re right. I personally don’t judge people for going to their inbound. If your school is working for you/your kid, especially if it’s your inbound- excellent. But I think the entire point of this thread was people who are choosing discomfort (long drives) so they can send their kids elsewhere.

Also in real life I think no one would dare to tell anyone they’re making a poor choice in sending their kids to their inbound. I would be shocked if I heard someone say that anyway. But what I have heard many times is people virtue signaling by judging those who choose to send their kids to charters. I’ve certainly had the deranged neighbor tell me how I’m racist or something (Always a white lady btw) for not choosing our inbound.

In an ideal world all the schools would be considered great and people would spend less energy judging the choices you make about your kids.

Your neighbor is upset with you because she perceives your choice to send your child to a charter as directly impacting the quality of the IB school, and thus the quality of options available to her. It's not judgment from a neutral place, it's coming from an acknowledgment that choices are interconnected.

I'm not saying it's okay for her to express her anger with you in a way that makes you uncomfortable, or to claim that your choice of school is driven by anything other than your interest in your child's education. Not endorsing that. But surely you understand that when people express frustration with IB families who go elsewhere, it is largely driven by a recognition that where your neighbors send their kids to school impacts the quality of the IB school and therefore impacts you?

I think the PP is very right that often people see implied judgment in the choice to send your kids IB. And I also think you are right that people do judge parents who send their kids to charters. But what is missing is the understanding that this judgment is not coming from this neutral place where you are just looking at someone else's choice that has nothing to do with you and passing judgment. People in DC judge each others school choices because of the way those choices impact schools and the community. I think we should all be more upfront about that because it's the elephant in the room a lot of the time.

(We don't go to our IB school, by the way. But I don't get upset when neighbors sometimes act judgmental towards us for this choice because I fully understand where that is coming from, and in fact I also felt that way at times when we WERE at the IB school. All compounded by the fact that often the person who is judging you is someone who tried to get a lottery seat at the school your kids do attend, but was not as lucky as you. These are all things you need to remember and to try to have empathy when you encounter these conversations.)

Well in our case it was our neighborhood crazy white savior who called us, a brown family, racist for choosing a bilingual charter so our kids could learn our heritage language. Think Joe Weedon sanctimommy type.

Our local elementary is oversubscribed. I understand that she might feel insecure, but as an adult you learn to not make others pay for your insecurities.

And no i don’t think that I am costing our inbound school anything by going to a charter school. Our middle school and high school, Eliot and Eastern, have horrendous track records when it comes to special needs kids. Our crazy neighbor has no idea of what special education is like for brown boys. And yet she feels okay to march her ugly bow legs over to our house and point fingers when she doesn’t understand. I will protect the privacy of my kids and I don’t need to explain myself to that thing, but I do think that people should be left alone to make choices for their kids. Not everyone is the same. Nor do I understand shaming people who attend their inbound!

ugggg sorry to say I 100% believe you.

Thanks. I wish it didn’t happen, but it 100% did.