Thrifty vs. Cheap when it comes to kids' stuff (clothes, school supplies, etc..)

[Anonymous]

I think the poster is either trying to gross us out. Worked. Or lying about income. Or both.

[Anonymous]

NP here. I have nothing against second hand of any kind, but I hate spending time shopping there. I SAH and I would have to bring my son with me, he would start asking for toys or would get bored if there are none...I would rather take him to a park or class.
Maybe when he starts preschool I will have more time and desire to thrift, but now I mostly shop at sales and clearances at lands end, gap and the like. I pay $5-10 for a t shirt, $15-25 for jeans, $40 for a jacket... I would guess I spend $300-400 a year on my sons stuff?

[Anonymous]

I like to buy from "higher end" consignment stores. I find that places such as Value Village *may* have good stuff, but they also have a lot of junk. So now I avoid going there unless I am okay with whatever-it-is not making it past a tenth use (e.g., excellent for Halloween costumes).

But getting good-quality stuff from higher end consignment stores almost always yields excellent results.

You might try ebay, too. Got some great clothes there, at least 25-50% off (after factoring in shipping costs, which in some places are ridiculous). I search by brand name.

[Anonymous]

Seriously. How much are you saving buying used underwear? I get like a pack of 8 or 10 with characters on it my kids' like for like $10. So in the end, are you really funding a lot of your college fund by using used underwear? I'm the poster who negotiates her bills, but seriously, used underwear?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seriously. How much are you saving buying used underwear? I get like a pack of 8 or 10 with characters on it my kids' like for like $10. So in the end, are you really funding a lot of your college fund by using used underwear? I'm the poster who negotiates her bills, but seriously, used underwear?!

It is Hanna Andersson organic underwear, $26 each, new.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Get this, we make 7 figure combine HHI and I not only shop at Goodwill, but also the Goodwill OUTLET! And the Salvatjon Army, which on Wednesdays has 25% off everything. I don't mind taking handing me downs clothes or furniture. I definitely play it forward by offering my hand me downs to others for free. How do you think some people stay well off!

There is nothing dirty about thrift stores, how is that different from antiques or vintage clothing? Some people on here sound like label whores (for lack of a better term), like people who walk around with price tags off their clothes. look at me, see how much I spent for my clothes! It's dumb.

This is pretty much us...just under a million dollar HHI. We max out retirements, have 175k in each of our kids' 529s (oldest kid is 6), and my kids wear name brand thrift-shop purchases Daily. I don't skimp on just them...I just try to buy on sale, use coupons when daily possible...like yogurt...one or two per shopping trip, and we save! My kids' clothes are then used by my sisters' kids and then donated to Goodwill or a church where they are shipped to El Salvador. I have a pretty confident feeling that my DD could careless she wore a previously used nice looking Nordestom dress in 2013 when it is 2025 and she starts college with everything paid for or it is 2045 and she doesn't have to support her parents.

I am being very honest here and not snarky at all - I feel like I could learn a lot about money from both of you. Our HHI is much much lower, but we try to buy on sale, use coupons when possible, and I also shop at consignment stores. We also donate back as well. It has taken me a long, long time to learn that if I blow all of our income on brand new items that we will always be perpetually spending and not saving- and never be well off. There have been many, many studies on the mindset and socio norms of those with incomes and net worth of seven figures or greater- and I am trying to learn a lot about money management from those because my own parents were and still are the label whores and spenders. So any advice you could share, I for one would be all ears!

I'm the second poster - the one beginning with "This is pretty much us..". These are little ways I save: a) I look at what is on sale at a grocery store that week and try to make it there. My kids eat a ton of fresh produce and it is very expensive. If grapes are on sale for $.99/lb somewhere, I will go there just for grapes IF it is on my way somewhere else. I wouldn't drive out of my way for grapes. b) I look for ways to save money by looking for coupon codes for things like buying contacts online, rental cars (for those, after I book a rate, I'm looking repeatedly over the internet to shave money off if the deal gets better); c) I never, every buy a new piece of clothing for my kids UNLESS it is for part of a sports uniform, sporting equipment, etc. This includes shoes, socks, underwear, etc. (MANY of those things are hand me downs - but I can't even see spending $10 on a pair of rainboots when I can them for $3 or less. I figure if a pair of kids' shoes new is $40 on average and you add tennis shoes, rain boots, snow boots, sandals, crocs x 2 times per year for size changes, that is $400/year. If I did that for 10 years, that is $4,000 on SHOES for goodness sakes. So instead I buy them for $1-$3/pair, and I buy them ALL the time! I buy the next sizes up and keep them in a box stored. I do the same for kids' hats, socks, clothing, etc. $4,000 in shoes saved over 10 years + $10,000 in clothes saved over 10 years (modest estimate for 2 kids I think) is $14,000 in my pocket that would have taken me $20,000 to earn (after taxes I'd have $14,000 or so). I have bought coupons off of Ebay for things I buy a lot - milk, yogurt, etc. I don't use coupons that often but do use them. I buy a lot of gifts for the upcoming birthday year (not my own kids but for the bday parties they attend) usually in Dec. when there are a ton of sales. I don't spend more than $10/gift but they are usually $20-$30 items. I NEVER buy a birthday gift for a bday party last minute - that alone would be annoying to me and another wasted $10 more than I want so spend. Again, let's say my kids go to 25 birthday parties a year - that's another $250 in savings at least. I buy most of my kids' presents for the holidays throughout the year at thrift shops. I count to make sure pieces are there - and look on amazon at reviews of a product before I buy it. I wrap and then put them away). My kids don't have electronic games (huge money and time zapper). I don't pay for games on the ipad. On the flip side: we travel and spend a great deal on that. We go out to eat when we want - but if I have a coupon, I'll use it. We have several rental properties - which bring in money but also cost money. I think the main idea is that you look at buying things last minute versus planning ahead. picking what is important to you IN THE FUTURE and what you can shave off now.

I think you need to see a mental health professional if you earn so much and your poor kids have used socks, underware and shoes. I also think your husband makes the money. Seriously please get some help before your kids grow up messed up and spend spend spend.

Oh...and I'm a lawyer, and earn plenty.

And your kids wear used underwear. Gross.

Yep...from an older cousin. Ewwww (not). Again, how much in your kids' 529s? Lets ask our kids 13 years from now who is glad how their parents shopped 13 years before...yours or mine? Mine will have all school paid for, will never have to financially support us, have a large inheritance distributed at certain ages, and even a trust set up to pay for THEIR kids' school. But you're right....they will not be happy I chose this path for them.

Our kids have fully funded college funds. We also have a HHI of $1 million and we do not buy used underwear, shoes or socks. Don't think you are the only one who makes a decent living around here.

No edit function but why don't you go around your office and tell everyone how your kids wear used underwear. See how great everyone thinks you are.

Uh why don't you go around telling YOUR office your kid has underwear that only he has used. See how great everyone thinks you are. The point is - people don't talk about their underwear...HELLO! Oh...we had a sleepover a few nights ago unexpectedly with a friend of one of my kids. She had nothing - borrowed complete change of clothes, including a bathing suit + underwear. Was that gross for the kid to take it? A few years ago we had a party and a kid had TWO accidents during the party - I provided a complete change of clothes, including underwear. Was that gross for the kid to take it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the poster is either trying to gross us out. Worked. Or lying about income. Or both.

We have a washing machine, a dryer, and chlorine bleach. How about you?

[Anonymous]

I think you're missing the point, although you are very defensive about your used underwear.

Would YOU wear used underwear? I am a clean person, if I gave you my washed, used underwear would you use it, for all your underwear needs?
How much are you even saving, sounds like penny wise pound foolish? You are better off spending time trying to save larger amounts of money on large purchases. Who needs $26 organic underwear? What's wrong with a new pack of 100% cotton Hanes. You seem stuck on the label, that its Hanna Anderson or whatever. You've crossed over from thrifty to down right cheap.
I had a friend growing up whose parents were so cheap, not thrifty, not poor, but cheap, that they made her wear her brother's hand me down underwear, a little girl wearing boys briefs. She got seriously teased over that. At some point you have to draw the line.

[Anonymous]

My god, why do you care what underwear someone else's kid is wearing if it's clean?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the poster is either trying to gross us out. Worked. Or lying about income. Or both.

We have a washing machine, a dryer, and chlorine bleach. How about you?

The bleach is probably undoing any benefits you achieve with the organic cotton. Just sayin'. I would never use bleach on my kids' sheets/clothes and I don't buy organic clothing/bedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the poster is either trying to gross us out. Worked. Or lying about income. Or both.

We have a washing machine, a dryer, and chlorine bleach. How about you?

The bleach is probably undoing any benefits you achieve with the organic cotton. Just sayin'. I would never use bleach on my kids' sheets/clothes and I don't buy organic clothing/bedding.

It isn't the organic that is needed...it is the thickness...nighttime wetter at times. Hanna only makes this thick of underwear. I'm not defensive about it at all. I honestly don't care what someone else thinks. After the first use...it is all used. Again, I specifically said we spent a lot on travel, going out, etc...so I'm not living a life where the kids suffer except in your mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you're missing the point, although you are very defensive about your used underwear.

Would YOU wear used underwear? I am a clean person, if I gave you my washed, used underwear would you use it, for all your underwear needs?
How much are you even saving, sounds like penny wise pound foolish? You are better off spending time trying to save larger amounts of money on large purchases. Who needs $26 organic underwear? What's wrong with a new pack of 100% cotton Hanes. You seem stuck on the label, that its Hanna Anderson or whatever. You've crossed over from thrifty to down right cheap.
I had a friend growing up whose parents were so cheap, not thrifty, not poor, but cheap, that they made her wear her brother's hand me down underwear, a little girl wearing boys briefs. She got seriously teased over that. At some point you have to draw the line.

I haven't crossed any such line. Again, I feel comfortable with my decision. My kids have more than enough, look great, we have tons saved, we spend tons on their activities, parties, etc. as granny used to say, " they suffer comfortably"

[Anonymous]

All those who say they don't have the time- there's a website called ThredUp.com that sells the same as high end consignment and you can order online and ship for free. You can also send in your stuff.

[Anonymous]

Why all the vitriol? Who cares what someone else does? Must all parenting choices be judged?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All those who say they don't have the time- there's a website called ThredUp.com that sells the same as high end consignment and you can order online and ship for free. You can also send in your stuff.

But for thredup, aren't you also required to send in your own stuff? I found that service to be incredibly picky with all of their comments. I didn't have the time needed to go to the lengths some people seemed to want. After I filled a box with lots of pajamas, then the lady who wanted my box asked me to add in dresses. So I cram a few dresses in there, and then take it all to the PO. Then each and every box is reviewed in detail. The lady liked my clothes which I have to say were extremely nice, but it is just so much damn work. I quit that service and have been donating close to Purple Heart because I don't have the time to deal with it. Oh yeah, I send a box full of hannah's and gymboree and got back a box of clothes 1/2 which did not fit and most were from Wal mart.