Anyone wish they were in their forties instead of thirties?

[Anonymous]

After watching Mama Mia I realized that sometimes I long to be older because there's this image of women in their late forties and fifties who are liberated from so much of the difficulties of the thirties. They can have this confidence and grace and sense of self (I know, not all women in this age range have this, but there is some research on this I have seen). Older women can seem just so much more liberated sometimes. Anyone else ever feel this way?

[Anonymous]

I'm in my 40s. Much more self-confidence and much happier now than before. But I'd rather have the body abck from the mid 30's!

[Anonymous]

No. Wishing you were older is as useless as wishing you were younger. "Confidence and grace and sense of self" have nothing to do with age.

[Anonymous]

PP, right no.
Hell no, I do NOT want to be older than 30 something...40 something is just too close to 50 and so on...

[Anonymous]

I am more confident, and I get what OP is asking. So yes, it is better than being in my 30's and god forbid the 20's where nothing you said was taken seriously or respected. I will say that I have met some younger women with that confidence, but it is rare. I do worry about 50 though.

[Anonymous]

I was in grad school working out 2 hours a day in my 30s (and obviously NOT getting my dissertation done) and in the best shape of my life. I miss that body! I was still optimistic about my career, figuring something would work out -- I would MAKE it work out.

Now in my 50s, older, wiser, life is less of an emotional roller coaster for sure. But more aches and pains that take longer to go away, not much time to work out, and the career didn't go the way I wanted. (That is still painful.) I'd like my 30s back, please!

But I will admit it is great to have gotten off the emotional roller coaster. I read my journals from back then and I think who IS that woman who had all that time to analyze every friggin' thing and who felt overwhelmed by every little emotion? She's quite irritating. I wish she'd just chill out!

Now: A cup of coffee and the morning paper in the cool of the morning. Sharing a cigar on the front steps with my DH in the evening. Sweet small pleasures of the day. Much less turmoil. Okay, I'll take it.

[Anonymous]

Hmm. I would like my twenties back, but no, I wouldn't like to be in my 40s just yet.

[Anonymous]

This seems like a problem that with luck will solve itself.

[Anonymous]

Um, no, not at all.
I wish I was back in my 20's.



But I'm very encouraged that there are those of you that are relishing the 40's and beyond.
It gives me hope when I worry that time is passing me by.

[Anonymous]

I'm 30 and certainly am not rusing to 40 or 50! I'm busy enjoying today. I'm in great shape, I have a beautiful child, I have a job that I only have to work 30hrs a week and make a decent enough income that I could support myself and DS if something happened to my husband. DH and I have been together for 10 years and we often look around at our lives and marvel that we have come so far and that everything has beautifully fallen into place. I really would love to hit the pause button right now.

The last time I wished I was older was when I was 20 and could not wait until I was 21, so I could hit the bars (legally).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was in grad school working out 2 hours a day in my 30s (and obviously NOT getting my dissertation done) and in the best shape of my life. I miss that body! I was still optimistic about my career, figuring something would work out -- I would MAKE it work out.

Now in my 50s, older, wiser, life is less of an emotional roller coaster for sure. But more aches and pains that take longer to go away, not much time to work out, and the career didn't go the way I wanted. (That is still painful.) I'd like my 30s back, please!

But I will admit it is great to have gotten off the emotional roller coaster. I read my journals from back then and I think who IS that woman who had all that time to analyze every friggin' thing and who felt overwhelmed by every little emotion? She's quite irritating. I wish she'd just chill out!

Now: A cup of coffee and the morning paper in the cool of the morning. Sharing a cigar on the front steps with my DH in the evening. Sweet small pleasures of the day. Much less turmoil. Okay, I'll take it.

A former coworker of mine said her forties were the best times of her life. She had a lifetime of knowledge, and none of the aches and pains that surface in your 50's.

[Anonymous]

I remember being in my 30s and noticing how much more confident older women were, and deciding that I wanted to be that confident then instead of having to wait. If you read Passages, you can learn about adult developmental stages (we have them, just like children do, but they tend to be measure in decades instead of years), and you can decide that you want to accelerate your emotional growth as an adult. I don't think you have to wait until you are 50 to have the same self-assurance as someone that age, but I do think you have to make a conscious decision to want that. I was always inspired by this poem, and aspired to have this freedom long before I became an old woman.

Warning - When I Am an Old Woman I Shall Wear Purple

By Jenny Joseph

When I am an old woman, I shall wear purple

with a red hat that doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.

And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves

and satin candles, and say we've no money for butter.

I shall sit down on the pavement when I am tired

and gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells

and run my stick along the public railings

and make up for the sobriety of my youth.

I shall go out in my slippers in the rain

and pick the flowers in other people's gardens

and learn to spit.



You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat

and eat three pounds of sausages at a go

or only bread and pickles for a week

and hoard pens and pencils and beer nuts and things in boxes.



But now we must have clothes that keep us dry

and pay our rent and not swear in the street

and set a good example for the children.

We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?

So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised

When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

[zumbamama]

No, time is going by too fast as it is. I am in my 30s and can't believe DS is 6 already! It just flew by! I want to savor every moment watching them grow up, so, I can wait for my 40s...it will be here too soon!

[Anonymous]

My feeling is that the grass is always greener...

[Anonymous]

Oh yea-can't wait to get a bunch more wrinkles, white hairs, become marginalized in society, and watch gravity take a toll on my body. Whoopee! A few years closer to my grave-can't wait!!! Getting even closer to when the kids will grow up and move across the country and I’ll only see them 2xs a year if I’m lucky, sounds oodles of fun. Hey, but at least I will finally become confident, I was wondering when that would finally happen.