Tell an opinion you have that is in the strong minority

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The way I see it, there are two types of SAHMs. Those that have to because their salary will not cover childcare and those who are lucky enough to be in a financial situation that allows them to stay home.

To the latter I say, embrace your choice and recognize this is a luxury. If I could check out of the daily 9-5 grind I would in a heartbeat. Of course what you do is difficult, most people realize caring for kids is hard, which is why we pay people to do it. It's just that being a working parent is more difficult and it's okay to accept that you wanted a less difficult path. As a SAHM, you will never have to worry about backup care on a snow day, getting out of a meeting because you have a sick child, prepping dinners/lunches the night before, grocery shopping on a lunch break, etc.

FWIW, many of my SAHM friends seem to have less tolerance for stress. I think being a working mom makes you better organized and more able to handle unexpected situations because you have to be. What kills me is when SAHMs post about needing more respect and how what they do is hard when the rest of us think gee how nice it would be to not have to balance my work life and kid's schedule. And when you make comments about "outsourcing" our kids, it comes off as sanctimonious because the whole reason you get to SAH is because of someone else's hard work to pay your bills.

FWIW, we all make the easier choice in life at times. I chose a lesser paying government attorney job than my friends who went into big law. I was blessed with no student loans, so I was able to make that choice. Never in a million years would I gripe to my big law friends about how stressful my job is when it pales in comparison to theirs.

So basically I say to SAHMs, just rock your decision and acknowledge it is a luxury not some huge sacrifice. And don't throw it in the face of working moms and expect us to fawn over what a martyr you are.

As soon as WOHMs rock their decision and acknowledge that they really are NOT with their kids most of the day. There isn't necessarily anything wrong with that - doesn't mean you're not bonded or have a great relationship. But don't act like being away all day long is EXACTLY the same as being home all day.

do you homeschool? how are your kids home all day?

They are young. One is home all day. One is in preschool 3 morning a week. And one is in K.

You probably don't remember this because you were at work (sorry - couldn't resist), but your children were very little at one point and weren't in school for 6 hrs/day.

Sorry wrong - my child was in an orphanage at that point. Your kids will be in school before you know it.

OK - so you legitimately don't have experience with a young child. Maybe you should refrain from generalizations involving young children...

Should I make generalizations about people who adopt?

what generalization did I make? I asked if you homeschooled.

you generalized that SAHMs have kids old enough for school

oh the horror

Yes, we all have different family experiences. Some work, some stay home, some stay home and then go back. Some get pg accidentally, some have trouble, some adopt.

Why the need to generalize and harsh on people who make different decisions than you?

I can only speak for me but nothing I've said on this thread is harsh. Unlike some others who have responded. I just wanted to respond that not all WOHMs are missing the entire day with their child because some WOHMs have older children. So your comment was not well received by me. That is all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The way I see it, there are two types of SAHMs. Those that have to because their salary will not cover childcare and those who are lucky enough to be in a financial situation that allows them to stay home.

To the latter I say, embrace your choice and recognize this is a luxury. If I could check out of the daily 9-5 grind I would in a heartbeat. Of course what you do is difficult, most people realize caring for kids is hard, which is why we pay people to do it. It's just that being a working parent is more difficult and it's okay to accept that you wanted a less difficult path. As a SAHM, you will never have to worry about backup care on a snow day, getting out of a meeting because you have a sick child, prepping dinners/lunches the night before, grocery shopping on a lunch break, etc.

FWIW, many of my SAHM friends seem to have less tolerance for stress. I think being a working mom makes you better organized and more able to handle unexpected situations because you have to be. What kills me is when SAHMs post about needing more respect and how what they do is hard when the rest of us think gee how nice it would be to not have to balance my work life and kid's schedule. And when you make comments about "outsourcing" our kids, it comes off as sanctimonious because the whole reason you get to SAH is because of someone else's hard work to pay your bills.

FWIW, we all make the easier choice in life at times. I chose a lesser paying government attorney job than my friends who went into big law. I was blessed with no student loans, so I was able to make that choice. Never in a million years would I gripe to my big law friends about how stressful my job is when it pales in comparison to theirs.

So basically I say to SAHMs, just rock your decision and acknowledge it is a luxury not some huge sacrifice. And don't throw it in the face of working moms and expect us to fawn over what a martyr you are.

As soon as WOHMs rock their decision and acknowledge that they really are NOT with their kids most of the day. There isn't necessarily anything wrong with that - doesn't mean you're not bonded or have a great relationship. But don't act like being away all day long is EXACTLY the same as being home all day.

do you homeschool? how are your kids home all day?

They are young. One is home all day. One is in preschool 3 morning a week. And one is in K.

You probably don't remember this because you were at work (sorry - couldn't resist), but your children were very little at one point and weren't in school for 6 hrs/day.

Sorry wrong - my child was in an orphanage at that point. Your kids will be in school before you know it.

OK - so you legitimately don't have experience with a young child. Maybe you should refrain from generalizations involving young children...

Should I make generalizations about people who adopt?

Wow. Again, the SAHM aren't nasty on this thread too? They can say hateful things, but then are just "defending themselves." Hate is hate.

How was that hateful?

Because pps keep saying the wohm are nasty and bashing SAHM and SAHM aren't being martyrs etc... Some SAHM are being just as "nasty" in the guise of defending themselves. Get over yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is no "WOHM mafia," you are deeply delusional about that. What an odd statement to make.

Here on DCUM there certainly is. This thread is a perfect example of it. I have never heard/read such seriously hateful and ignorant comments regarding SAHMs. I thought the mommy wars were long over, but I guess some WOHMs feel differently.

No, there's really not. If you see working moms, heaven forbid, defending themselves, it's because of ridiculous accusations like "You outsource raising your kids" and "You value material comforts over spending time with your family." That's patently wrong. Also I would guess given the higher incomes in this area that the majority of moms work so you're also insulting a very large group of people. But I promise there is no WORKING MOMS BAT-SIGNAL.

Are you in DC? Maybe go smoke some legal weed and chill out for a bit.

You do realize it was the WOHM troll(s) who started this entire thing by calling SAHMs "lazy," right? Do you really expect the SAHMs not to defend themselves? None of this would have even happened had the insults not been hurled FIRST by the WMs. It's very clear you haven't read the entire thread. Maybe do that next time before you jump in with your false assumptions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is no "WOHM mafia," you are deeply delusional about that. What an odd statement to make.

Here on DCUM there certainly is. This thread is a perfect example of it. I have never heard/read such seriously hateful and ignorant comments regarding SAHMs. I thought the mommy wars were long over, but I guess some WOHMs feel differently.

No, there's really not. If you see working moms, heaven forbid, defending themselves, it's because of ridiculous accusations like "You outsource raising your kids" and "You value material comforts over spending time with your family." That's patently wrong. Also I would guess given the higher incomes in this area that the majority of moms work so you're also insulting a very large group of people. But I promise there is no WORKING MOMS BAT-SIGNAL.

Are you in DC? Maybe go smoke some legal weed and chill out for a bit.

Then please explain who is raising your toddler when you are working 10+ hours a day

And people keep saying SAHM are playing nice!

Why should they when so far, on this thread alone, they've been called "lazy, living off their husband's paycheck (???), and no better than a McDonald's employee"? Please do explain why SAHMs should "play nice" after having been called ignorant and uneducated? Do everyone a favor and READ THE ENTIRE THREAD.

[Anonymous]

I think the working moms are guilty of bashing SAHMs as lazy, entitled, etc., which is unfair, but there are plenty of SAHMs on this thread and many others who have made nasty comments about "outsourcing chikdcare," SAH being a higher calling than any job, basically implying working moms do not care as much about their kids, etc. I think making nasty comments making moms feel guilty for working is way more callous than calling someone lazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There is no "WOHM mafia," you are deeply delusional about that. What an odd statement to make.

Here on DCUM there certainly is. This thread is a perfect example of it. I have never heard/read such seriously hateful and ignorant comments regarding SAHMs. I thought the mommy wars were long over, but I guess some WOHMs feel differently.

No, there's really not. If you see working moms, heaven forbid, defending themselves, it's because of ridiculous accusations like "You outsource raising your kids" and "You value material comforts over spending time with your family." That's patently wrong. Also I would guess given the higher incomes in this area that the majority of moms work so you're also insulting a very large group of people. But I promise there is no WORKING MOMS BAT-SIGNAL.

Are you in DC? Maybe go smoke some legal weed and chill out for a bit.

Then please explain who is raising your toddler when you are working 10+ hours a day

And people keep saying SAHM are playing nice!

Why should they when so far, on this thread alone, they've been called "lazy, living off their husband's paycheck (???), and no better than a McDonald's employee"? Please do explain why SAHMs should "play nice" after having been called ignorant and uneducated? Do everyone a favor and READ THE ENTIRE THREAD.

I did. And I'll say it again- stop acting like SAHM
Are being saints on this thread! They're just as hateful!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The way I see it, there are two types of SAHMs. Those that have to because their salary will not cover childcare and those who are lucky enough to be in a financial situation that allows them to stay home.

To the latter I say, embrace your choice and recognize this is a luxury. If I could check out of the daily 9-5 grind I would in a heartbeat. Of course what you do is difficult, most people realize caring for kids is hard, which is why we pay people to do it. It's just that being a working parent is more difficult and it's okay to accept that you wanted a less difficult path. As a SAHM, you will never have to worry about backup care on a snow day, getting out of a meeting because you have a sick child, prepping dinners/lunches the night before, grocery shopping on a lunch break, etc.

FWIW, many of my SAHM friends seem to have less tolerance for stress. I think being a working mom makes you better organized and more able to handle unexpected situations because you have to be. What kills me is when SAHMs post about needing more respect and how what they do is hard when the rest of us think gee how nice it would be to not have to balance my work life and kid's schedule. And when you make comments about "outsourcing" our kids, it comes off as sanctimonious because the whole reason you get to SAH is because of someone else's hard work to pay your bills.

FWIW, we all make the easier choice in life at times. I chose a lesser paying government attorney job than my friends who went into big law. I was blessed with no student loans, so I was able to make that choice. Never in a million years would I gripe to my big law friends about how stressful my job is when it pales in comparison to theirs.

So basically I say to SAHMs, just rock your decision and acknowledge it is a luxury not some huge sacrifice. And don't throw it in the face of working moms and expect us to fawn over what a martyr you are.

OMG. Yet another example of someone who clearly didn't see (or won't acknowledge) the insults that WMs were throwing out first - way before anyone retaliated in kind. For the record, I agree with you that SAH is a luxury and not one single day goes by that I don't thank my lucky stars for my situation. I don't consider myself a "martyr" of any kind, and I know of no SAHMs who do either. Quite the opposite, in fact. I actually DO "rock" my decision each and every day. Nothing to apologize for or explain in the least. We are very, very fortunate people. But to call us "lazy" because we're not also working at a paying job at the same time? Sorry, but you're not going to get an apology for retaliating to such ignorant, mean, and completely untrue accusations.

Your statements, especially your last paragraph where you state that SAHMs expect people to "fawn over" us show very clearly that you have no idea what you're talking about and haven't even bothered to read the entire thread, starting up where some WM said SAHMs were lazy. Maybe start there and you *might* get an inkling of what's been going on here and just why the SAHMs reading this thread have responded as they did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All the accusations being made of SAHMs and now they're being accused of acting like martyrs? What about the WOHMs? Are they not acting like martyrs? All the while they are slamming SAHM's at every chance they get!

Exactly. All I keep hearing from the WOHMs is, "Well, I work AND do everything you SAHMs do, so I'm obviously doing much more than you!" Martyr complex, anybody?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The way I see it, there are two types of SAHMs. Those that have to because their salary will not cover childcare and those who are lucky enough to be in a financial situation that allows them to stay home.

To the latter I say, embrace your choice and recognize this is a luxury. If I could check out of the daily 9-5 grind I would in a heartbeat. Of course what you do is difficult, most people realize caring for kids is hard, which is why we pay people to do it. It's just that being a working parent is more difficult and it's okay to accept that you wanted a less difficult path. As a SAHM, you will never have to worry about backup care on a snow day, getting out of a meeting because you have a sick child, prepping dinners/lunches the night before, grocery shopping on a lunch break, etc.

FWIW, many of my SAHM friends seem to have less tolerance for stress. I think being a working mom makes you better organized and more able to handle unexpected situations because you have to be. What kills me is when SAHMs post about needing more respect and how what they do is hard when the rest of us think gee how nice it would be to not have to balance my work life and kid's schedule. And when you make comments about "outsourcing" our kids, it comes off as sanctimonious because the whole reason you get to SAH is because of someone else's hard work to pay your bills.

FWIW, we all make the easier choice in life at times. I chose a lesser paying government attorney job than my friends who went into big law. I was blessed with no student loans, so I was able to make that choice. Never in a million years would I gripe to my big law friends about how stressful my job is when it pales in comparison to theirs.

So basically I say to SAHMs, just rock your decision and acknowledge it is a luxury not some huge sacrifice. And don't throw it in the face of working moms and expect us to fawn over what a martyr you are.

As soon as WOHMs rock their decision and acknowledge that they really are NOT with their kids most of the day. There isn't necessarily anything wrong with that - doesn't mean you're not bonded or have a great relationship. But don't act like being away all day long is EXACTLY the same as being home all day.

do you homeschool? how are your kids home all day?

They are young. One is home all day. One is in preschool 3 morning a week. And one is in K.

You probably don't remember this because you were at work (sorry - couldn't resist), but your children were very little at one point and weren't in school for 6 hrs/day.

Sorry wrong - my child was in an orphanage at that point. Your kids will be in school before you know it.

Couldn't resist that one, could you? Martyr, much?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The way I see it, there are two types of SAHMs. Those that have to because their salary will not cover childcare and those who are lucky enough to be in a financial situation that allows them to stay home.

To the latter I say, embrace your choice and recognize this is a luxury. If I could check out of the daily 9-5 grind I would in a heartbeat. Of course what you do is difficult, most people realize caring for kids is hard, which is why we pay people to do it. It's just that being a working parent is more difficult and it's okay to accept that you wanted a less difficult path. As a SAHM, you will never have to worry about backup care on a snow day, getting out of a meeting because you have a sick child, prepping dinners/lunches the night before, grocery shopping on a lunch break, etc.

FWIW, many of my SAHM friends seem to have less tolerance for stress. I think being a working mom makes you better organized and more able to handle unexpected situations because you have to be. What kills me is when SAHMs post about needing more respect and how what they do is hard when the rest of us think gee how nice it would be to not have to balance my work life and kid's schedule. And when you make comments about "outsourcing" our kids, it comes off as sanctimonious because the whole reason you get to SAH is because of someone else's hard work to pay your bills.

FWIW, we all make the easier choice in life at times. I chose a lesser paying government attorney job than my friends who went into big law. I was blessed with no student loans, so I was able to make that choice. Never in a million years would I gripe to my big law friends about how stressful my job is when it pales in comparison to theirs.

So basically I say to SAHMs, just rock your decision and acknowledge it is a luxury not some huge sacrifice. And don't throw it in the face of working moms and expect us to fawn over what a martyr you are.

As soon as WOHMs rock their decision and acknowledge that they really are NOT with their kids most of the day. There isn't necessarily anything wrong with that - doesn't mean you're not bonded or have a great relationship. But don't act like being away all day long is EXACTLY the same as being home all day.

You act like your kids will be home with you forever. They will go to school and then what will you do with you time? Planning to go to work?

Not the PP, but what business is it of yours? If we choose to go back to work when the kids are older, then that's our decision - what do you have to do with it?

[Anonymous]

You all need you own forum for SAHM v. WOHM, like Jeff did with the explicit and the nanny forums. Assholes all of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The way I see it, there are two types of SAHMs. Those that have to because their salary will not cover childcare and those who are lucky enough to be in a financial situation that allows them to stay home.

To the latter I say, embrace your choice and recognize this is a luxury. If I could check out of the daily 9-5 grind I would in a heartbeat. Of course what you do is difficult, most people realize caring for kids is hard, which is why we pay people to do it. It's just that being a working parent is more difficult and it's okay to accept that you wanted a less difficult path. As a SAHM, you will never have to worry about backup care on a snow day, getting out of a meeting because you have a sick child, prepping dinners/lunches the night before, grocery shopping on a lunch break, etc.

FWIW, many of my SAHM friends seem to have less tolerance for stress. I think being a working mom makes you better organized and more able to handle unexpected situations because you have to be. What kills me is when SAHMs post about needing more respect and how what they do is hard when the rest of us think gee how nice it would be to not have to balance my work life and kid's schedule. And when you make comments about "outsourcing" our kids, it comes off as sanctimonious because the whole reason you get to SAH is because of someone else's hard work to pay your bills.

FWIW, we all make the easier choice in life at times. I chose a lesser paying government attorney job than my friends who went into big law. I was blessed with no student loans, so I was able to make that choice. Never in a million years would I gripe to my big law friends about how stressful my job is when it pales in comparison to theirs.

So basically I say to SAHMs, just rock your decision and acknowledge it is a luxury not some huge sacrifice. And don't throw it in the face of working moms and expect us to fawn over what a martyr you are.

As soon as WOHMs rock their decision and acknowledge that they really are NOT with their kids most of the day. There isn't necessarily anything wrong with that - doesn't mean you're not bonded or have a great relationship. But don't act like being away all day long is EXACTLY the same as being home all day.

do you homeschool? how are your kids home all day?

They are young. One is home all day. One is in preschool 3 morning a week. And one is in K.

You probably don't remember this because you were at work (sorry - couldn't resist), but your children were very little at one point and weren't in school for 6 hrs/day.

Sorry wrong - my child was in an orphanage at that point. Your kids will be in school before you know it.

OK - so you legitimately don't have experience with a young child. Maybe you should refrain from generalizations involving young children...

Should I make generalizations about people who adopt?

Wow. Again, the SAHM aren't nasty on this thread too? They can say hateful things, but then are just "defending themselves." Hate is hate.

Clearly you aren't understanding why PP made that remark re: generalizations about people who adopt. The point is that the other PP was making some sweeping generalization about why a SAHM should still be at home if her kids are in school, so the adoption question was rhetorical. The point is, why make sweeping generalizations about anybody? It's really too bad none of the WMs playing victim on this thread will cop to the fact that they started all of this in the first place. And if someone says hateful things about me or the lifestyle I've chosen, I'm going to retaliate in kind. Just as you would.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The way I see it, there are two types of SAHMs. Those that have to because their salary will not cover childcare and those who are lucky enough to be in a financial situation that allows them to stay home.

To the latter I say, embrace your choice and recognize this is a luxury. If I could check out of the daily 9-5 grind I would in a heartbeat. Of course what you do is difficult, most people realize caring for kids is hard, which is why we pay people to do it. It's just that being a working parent is more difficult and it's okay to accept that you wanted a less difficult path. As a SAHM, you will never have to worry about backup care on a snow day, getting out of a meeting because you have a sick child, prepping dinners/lunches the night before, grocery shopping on a lunch break, etc.

FWIW, many of my SAHM friends seem to have less tolerance for stress. I think being a working mom makes you better organized and more able to handle unexpected situations because you have to be. What kills me is when SAHMs post about needing more respect and how what they do is hard when the rest of us think gee how nice it would be to not have to balance my work life and kid's schedule. And when you make comments about "outsourcing" our kids, it comes off as sanctimonious because the whole reason you get to SAH is because of someone else's hard work to pay your bills.

FWIW, we all make the easier choice in life at times. I chose a lesser paying government attorney job than my friends who went into big law. I was blessed with no student loans, so I was able to make that choice. Never in a million years would I gripe to my big law friends about how stressful my job is when it pales in comparison to theirs.

So basically I say to SAHMs, just rock your decision and acknowledge it is a luxury not some huge sacrifice. And don't throw it in the face of working moms and expect us to fawn over what a martyr you are.

OMG. Yet another example of someone who clearly didn't see (or won't acknowledge) the insults that WMs were throwing out first - way before anyone retaliated in kind. For the record, I agree with you that SAH is a luxury and not one single day goes by that I don't thank my lucky stars for my situation. I don't consider myself a "martyr" of any kind, and I know of no SAHMs who do either. Quite the opposite, in fact. I actually DO "rock" my decision each and every day. Nothing to apologize for or explain in the least. We are very, very fortunate people. But to call us "lazy" because we're not also working at a paying job at the same time? Sorry, but you're not going to get an apology for retaliating to such ignorant, mean, and completely untrue accusations.

Your statements, especially your last paragraph where you state that SAHMs expect people to "fawn over" us show very clearly that you have no idea what you're talking about and haven't even bothered to read the entire thread, starting up where some WM said SAHMs were lazy. Maybe start there and you *might* get an inkling of what's been going on here and just why the SAHMs reading this thread have responded as they did.

Is that how you're raising your children? "So and so started it" and retaliate in kind. Maybe you could do need to hire some outside help to teach your children better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The way I see it, there are two types of SAHMs. Those that have to because their salary will not cover childcare and those who are lucky enough to be in a financial situation that allows them to stay home.

To the latter I say, embrace your choice and recognize this is a luxury. If I could check out of the daily 9-5 grind I would in a heartbeat. Of course what you do is difficult, most people realize caring for kids is hard, which is why we pay people to do it. It's just that being a working parent is more difficult and it's okay to accept that you wanted a less difficult path. As a SAHM, you will never have to worry about backup care on a snow day, getting out of a meeting because you have a sick child, prepping dinners/lunches the night before, grocery shopping on a lunch break, etc.

FWIW, many of my SAHM friends seem to have less tolerance for stress. I think being a working mom makes you better organized and more able to handle unexpected situations because you have to be. What kills me is when SAHMs post about needing more respect and how what they do is hard when the rest of us think gee how nice it would be to not have to balance my work life and kid's schedule. And when you make comments about "outsourcing" our kids, it comes off as sanctimonious because the whole reason you get to SAH is because of someone else's hard work to pay your bills.

FWIW, we all make the easier choice in life at times. I chose a lesser paying government attorney job than my friends who went into big law. I was blessed with no student loans, so I was able to make that choice. Never in a million years would I gripe to my big law friends about how stressful my job is when it pales in comparison to theirs.

So basically I say to SAHMs, just rock your decision and acknowledge it is a luxury not some huge sacrifice. And don't throw it in the face of working moms and expect us to fawn over what a martyr you are.

OMG. Yet another example of someone who clearly didn't see (or won't acknowledge) the insults that WMs were throwing out first - way before anyone retaliated in kind. For the record, I agree with you that SAH is a luxury and not one single day goes by that I don't thank my lucky stars for my situation. I don't consider myself a "martyr" of any kind, and I know of no SAHMs who do either. Quite the opposite, in fact. I actually DO "rock" my decision each and every day. Nothing to apologize for or explain in the least. We are very, very fortunate people. But to call us "lazy" because we're not also working at a paying job at the same time? Sorry, but you're not going to get an apology for retaliating to such ignorant, mean, and completely untrue accusations.

Your statements, especially your last paragraph where you state that SAHMs expect people to "fawn over" us show very clearly that you have no idea what you're talking about and haven't even bothered to read the entire thread, starting up where some WM said SAHMs were lazy. Maybe start there and you *might* get an inkling of what's been going on here and just why the SAHMs reading this thread have responded as they did.

Is that how you're raising your children? "So and so started it" and retaliate in kind. Maybe you could do need to hire some outside help to teach your children better.

*should

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The way I see it, there are two types of SAHMs. Those that have to because their salary will not cover childcare and those who are lucky enough to be in a financial situation that allows them to stay home.

To the latter I say, embrace your choice and recognize this is a luxury. If I could check out of the daily 9-5 grind I would in a heartbeat. Of course what you do is difficult, most people realize caring for kids is hard, which is why we pay people to do it. It's just that being a working parent is more difficult and it's okay to accept that you wanted a less difficult path. As a SAHM, you will never have to worry about backup care on a snow day, getting out of a meeting because you have a sick child, prepping dinners/lunches the night before, grocery shopping on a lunch break, etc.

FWIW, many of my SAHM friends seem to have less tolerance for stress. I think being a working mom makes you better organized and more able to handle unexpected situations because you have to be. What kills me is when SAHMs post about needing more respect and how what they do is hard when the rest of us think gee how nice it would be to not have to balance my work life and kid's schedule. And when you make comments about "outsourcing" our kids, it comes off as sanctimonious because the whole reason you get to SAH is because of someone else's hard work to pay your bills.

FWIW, we all make the easier choice in life at times. I chose a lesser paying government attorney job than my friends who went into big law. I was blessed with no student loans, so I was able to make that choice. Never in a million years would I gripe to my big law friends about how stressful my job is when it pales in comparison to theirs.

So basically I say to SAHMs, just rock your decision and acknowledge it is a luxury not some huge sacrifice. And don't throw it in the face of working moms and expect us to fawn over what a martyr you are.

As soon as WOHMs rock their decision and acknowledge that they really are NOT with their kids most of the day. There isn't necessarily anything wrong with that - doesn't mean you're not bonded or have a great relationship. But don't act like being away all day long is EXACTLY the same as being home all day.

do you homeschool? how are your kids home all day?

They are young. One is home all day. One is in preschool 3 morning a week. And one is in K.

You probably don't remember this because you were at work (sorry - couldn't resist), but your children were very little at one point and weren't in school for 6 hrs/day.

Sorry wrong - my child was in an orphanage at that point. Your kids will be in school before you know it.

Couldn't resist that one, could you? Martyr, much?

what is that supposed to mean?