Arriving 10 minutes early to a dinner party

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No wonder there are lots of "why don't I have any close friends" threads. It's because you're rude! Rude in this instance is coming to a dinner party early and then claiming that any host who is bothered by it is unorganized and uptight. You don't get it and I'm sure this is but one example.

Yeah, that's why.

[Anonymous]

Who has said they would hold a grudge about a guest arriving early? Most (all?) have said that it's rude and they might be annoyed or ask the early guest to pitch in, but that's it. It's the rude earlycomers who are most offended. I assume they're embarrassed by reading this and realizing their mistake(s).

It's not rocket science. Show up when you are asked to.

[Anonymous]

Oh for the love of Pete...where do all you crazy people come from?

If it were me, I wouldn't care if you were a few minutes early or a few minutes late.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh for the love of Pete...where do all you crazy people come from?

If it were me, I wouldn't care if you were a few minutes early or a few minutes late.

+1. It's these attitudes which lead to so many saying that it's so tough to make friends in this area. People take things so damn seriously that you constantly have to worry about offending someone. Get a grip -- it's being early or late to a dinner party at a private home. It's not like being late for brain surgery or to a state dinner at the WH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh for the love of Pete...where do all you crazy people come from?

If it were me, I wouldn't care if you were a few minutes early or a few minutes late.

+1. It's these attitudes which lead to so many saying that it's so tough to make friends in this area. People take things so damn seriously that you constantly have to worry about offending someone. Get a grip -- it's being early or late to a dinner party at a private home. It's not like being late for brain surgery or to a state dinner at the WH.

+2. If the host is getting upset by this then it's a personality issue with the host.

[Anonymous]

Go back and read the original post. Is it okay to arrive to a dinner party 10 minutes early or is it considered rude/gauche? People are merely answering the question that yes, it is considered rude. Would I get upset or offended? Not really, but that doesn't mean it isn't rude. It isn't polite to show up early to an event in someone's home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go back and read the original post. Is it okay to arrive to a dinner party 10 minutes early or is it considered rude/gauche? People are merely answering the question that yes, it is considered rude. Would I get upset or offended? Not really, but that doesn't mean it isn't rude. It isn't polite to show up early to an event in someone's home.

More than one person will no longer invite someone because of it. People are super uptight about it.

[Anonymous]

I'm pretty sure that the people entertaining all the time are not the same as those who have trouble meeting people in the area.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go back and read the original post. Is it okay to arrive to a dinner party 10 minutes early or is it considered rude/gauche? People are merely answering the question that yes, it is considered rude. Would I get upset or offended? Not really, but that doesn't mean it isn't rude. It isn't polite to show up early to an event in someone's home.

Did read the original post and will repeat myself...for the love of Pete! What is wrong with you people? Coming a little early is rude? It rises to the level that you actually can trot out a word like "gauche". Pah-lease. Lighten up people.

[Anonymous]

DON'T. Way stressful!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Go back and read the original post. Is it okay to arrive to a dinner party 10 minutes early or is it considered rude/gauche? People are merely answering the question that yes, it is considered rude. Would I get upset or offended? Not really, but that doesn't mean it isn't rude. It isn't polite to show up early to an event in someone's home.

Did read the original post and will repeat myself...for the love of Pete! What is wrong with you people? Coming a little early is rude? It rises to the level that you actually can trot out a word like "gauche". Pah-lease. Lighten up people.

'Gauche' was in the OP, I was quoting. I actually hate that word.

It is rude to show up early. You may not care and your friends will get over it, but it's not polite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I posted earlier about ten minutes early "used to be" the norm. It occurred to me though, that this advice came from people who:

-Either didn't work outside the house, or not full time.
-Kept their house pretty much company ready at all times.
-Had friends in the same situation, and it was pretty much expected that those friends would be the early ones.
- One did these things because the older ladies at her church told her she should. Along with always being ready for one of them to stop by anytime after 8 AM except on Sundays. So her house, kids, etc. were expected to be "ready." This wasn't all that long ago.. in the last 10 years.


Things have changed.. and so has what is acceptable.

For me.. it's just a "thing" I have that everything has to be done and I have to be ready early just in case. However, I will keep in mind that not everyone is like me.

I work full time outside the home and have kids. My house is company ready at all times.

GREAT! So you would also have all of the food ready as well as yourself, and be fine with guests arriving a little early?

The point was that many people's lives have changed from those of the people who used to insist to me that being 10 minutes early was the "right" way to do things.

[Anonymous]

Don't show up early...those 10-15 minutes are important for the host/hostess to unwind from the duty of "house cleaner", "organizer" and "chef."

If you show up early, the host/hostess will still be happy to see you but there's still an element of stress. My guests showed up 20 minutes early last night and I didn't have a chance to freshen up.

Drive around the block, go pick up some wine somewhere...just don't knock on the door till the time matches the invitation! Common courtesy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't show up early...those 10-15 minutes are important for the host/hostess to unwind from the duty of "house cleaner", "organizer" and "chef."

If you show up early, the host/hostess will still be happy to see you but there's still an element of stress. My guests showed up 20 minutes early last night and I didn't have a chance to freshen up.

Drive around the block, go pick up some wine somewhere...just don't knock on the door till the time matches the invitation! Common courtesy.

I had guests show up while I was still cooking.

The wine and appetizers were out, table was set, and I was dressed.

I don't wait until 6:30 to "freshen up" if guests are to arrive at 7.

poor planning, folks

Do you work? Do you ever spearhead projects? Where's your Plan B?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't show up early...those 10-15 minutes are important for the host/hostess to unwind from the duty of "house cleaner", "organizer" and "chef."

If you show up early, the host/hostess will still be happy to see you but there's still an element of stress. My guests showed up 20 minutes early last night and I didn't have a chance to freshen up.

Drive around the block, go pick up some wine somewhere...just don't knock on the door till the time matches the invitation! Common courtesy.

I had guests show up while I was still cooking.

The wine and appetizers were out, table was set, and I was dressed.

I don't wait until 6:30 to "freshen up" if guests are to arrive at 7.

poor planning, folks

Do you work? Do you ever spearhead projects? Where's your Plan B?

You are singlehandedly causing people to leave the DC area in droves.