Nobody Wants This on Netflix

[Anonymous]

I’ve not watched this yet but I’m surprised some find it offensive towards Jewish women, 3 people have recommended it to me and all 3 were Jewish women

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I like it, but I’m unfortunately distracted by the fact that something has changed with her face that almost makes her look like a different person. It could just be that she’s shaping her eyebrows differently. I know, I know, this is absurd.

To be fair, he also looks different, but still looks like himself.

She looks really weird and I think it’s because she’s a 44 year old woman who is playing a 30-35 year old or something. She needs to move past the overgrown 20somerhimg role. I loved her in the good place and I think she has some acting skills, but she needs to stretch her wings a little and also let her face age more naturally. She’s gonna look llle a total plastic face by 50.

[Anonymous]

I’m wondering why they styled her hair that way. It looks so greasy. She’s historically very cute so it’s like they went out of their way to make her not very attractive. Weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Finished the series last night.

What did I take away from this?

Erin Foster appreciahes many of the spiritual and traditional elements of Judaism. But it’s pretty clear she has a lot of trauma related to being accepted by the Jewish women in her husband’s life. Foster really did Jewish women dirty in this portrayal - she clearly has a bone to pick.

You also need to remember that the vast majority of people watching this series have ZERO Jewish people in their personal lives. So this series - warts and all - is forming their views of Judaism, their traditions, family life, etc. This is a very skewed portrayal and, frankly, kind of worrying.

Disagree.

Quick show of hands: who felt immediately accepted by their BF’s mom? Anyone?

Now let’s just hear from those dating a Jewish guy (regardless of your religion). Anyone?

Now let’s hear from the shiksas: how long until your MIL accepted you? How was the wedding planning?

Life is messy. Plenty of moms are difficult or perceived as difficult by the GF regardless of religion. It’s a thing.

Regardless, there’s no hook for a show without conflict. Duh.

I actually felt completely accepted by my husband’s mother from day 1. I am Jewish and they are not, if it makes a difference.

Then you are lucky.

When did you start dating? I think it’s better in the last 10 or 20 years than it was before.

Is your MIL American? White? Religious? That matters, too.

We began dating 20 years ago. She is a white American, raised Catholic but no longer practicing.

?

So then you didn’t experience a Jewish MIL. Your MIL is a lapsed Catholic.

This thread is about a show where the Jewish MIL takes issue with the non-Jewish GF.

You need to read the question to which I was responding: “who felt immediately accepted by their boyfriend’s mom?”

Reading is fundamental.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m wondering why they styled her hair that way. It looks so greasy. She’s historically very cute so it’s like they went out of their way to make her not very attractive. Weird.

I think it's the color. I feel the same way but when I really look at it, it looks healthy and clean if a little flat. But I think if the color was closer to the store after character's, it would bug me. Or if it was just brown. But they went with a dingy blonde and not only does it make her hair look dirty/greasy, but I think it also makes her face look redder in certain scenes. I have similar coloring and the issue is that you need more contrast between skin and hair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Kristen bell has something weird with her mouth - it’s the same issue due to filler or something that Christa miller has from scrubs.

The actors are good looking 40yo who are playing young 30s and it doesn’t work.

A worldly woman who grew up in Sherman oaks does and does not know what Shabbat is or anything about Judaism is not believable.

The emigration timeline for his parents does not really work with history, but whatever. Nor does the promotion politics of his job with the senior rabbi.

Seth cohen is beautiful.

I didn’t know who he was before this so I just looked him up. He’s attractive in this one but WAY more attractive without the beard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like it, but I’m unfortunately distracted by the fact that something has changed with her face that almost makes her look like a different person. It could just be that she’s shaping her eyebrows differently. I know, I know, this is absurd.

To be fair, he also looks different, but still looks like himself.

She looks really weird and I think it’s because she’s a 44 year old woman who is playing a 30-35 year old or something. She needs to move past the overgrown 20somerhimg role. I loved her in the good place and I think she has some acting skills, but she needs to stretch her wings a little and also let her face age more naturally. She’s gonna look llle a total plastic face by 50.

Is she actually playing a 35 year old? When I watched, I assumed they were both 40 something singles similar to their real life ages. The rabbis brother had a teenage daughter and was clearly meant to be late thirties/early forties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like it, but I’m unfortunately distracted by the fact that something has changed with her face that almost makes her look like a different person. It could just be that she’s shaping her eyebrows differently. I know, I know, this is absurd.

To be fair, he also looks different, but still looks like himself.

She looks really weird and I think it’s because she’s a 44 year old woman who is playing a 30-35 year old or something. She needs to move past the overgrown 20somerhimg role. I loved her in the good place and I think she has some acting skills, but she needs to stretch her wings a little and also let her face age more naturally. She’s gonna look llle a total plastic face by 50.

Is she actually playing a 35 year old? When I watched, I assumed they were both 40 something singles similar to their real life ages. The rabbis brother had a teenage daughter and was clearly meant to be late thirties/early forties.

+1. I could be missing something, but I think the age was ambiguous. There was one reference maybe between the sisters about being in their 30s, and the older brother with a teenager. They could easily be 40yo women, give or take a few years on either side.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like it, but I’m unfortunately distracted by the fact that something has changed with her face that almost makes her look like a different person. It could just be that she’s shaping her eyebrows differently. I know, I know, this is absurd.

To be fair, he also looks different, but still looks like himself.

She looks really weird and I think it’s because she’s a 44 year old woman who is playing a 30-35 year old or something. She needs to move past the overgrown 20somerhimg role. I loved her in the good place and I think she has some acting skills, but she needs to stretch her wings a little and also let her face age more naturally. She’s gonna look llle a total plastic face by 50.

Is she actually playing a 35 year old? When I watched, I assumed they were both 40 something singles similar to their real life ages. The rabbis brother had a teenage daughter and was clearly meant to be late thirties/early forties.

I think he is supposed to be the younger son. Rebecca looked much younger than Joanne. Kristin Bell was just too old for the part. And Brody without the beard easily can pass as 35.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like it, but I’m unfortunately distracted by the fact that something has changed with her face that almost makes her look like a different person. It could just be that she’s shaping her eyebrows differently. I know, I know, this is absurd.

To be fair, he also looks different, but still looks like himself.

She looks really weird and I think it’s because she’s a 44 year old woman who is playing a 30-35 year old or something. She needs to move past the overgrown 20somerhimg role. I loved her in the good place and I think she has some acting skills, but she needs to stretch her wings a little and also let her face age more naturally. She’s gonna look llle a total plastic face by 50.

Is she actually playing a 35 year old? When I watched, I assumed they were both 40 something singles similar to their real life ages. The rabbis brother had a teenage daughter and was clearly meant to be late thirties/early forties.

I think he is supposed to be the younger son. Rebecca looked much younger than Joanne. Kristin Bell was just too old for the part. And Brody without the beard easily can pass as 35.

Both Bell and Brody are 44. They look their age, what’s wrong with that? I don’t understand the hyperfixation on their ages and why the female lead is supposed to be so young.

Justine Lupe (the sister, who I think is a great comedic actress) is 35.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:The reality is this show could have been made with any religious or cultural or racial groups.

I observed the following IRL:

-Chinese friend’s entire family didn’t attend her wedding because they were outraged that she was marrying a non-Chinese man. Same religion, same advanced level of education, and the guy is awesome on all levels. Didn’t matter. Pretty sure we’ve seen movies about how this plays out in Asian culture, right?

-A white friend’s family threatened to cut her off when she got engaged to a black man. His family wasn’t any better: his family was blatantly hostile to her the first time he brought her to a family party. She wasn’t deterred despite leaving in tears. She kept showing up and being kind, and they eventually came around. Ditto for her family.

-A Muslim friend’s family did cut her off (stopped paying her tuition) when she got engaged to a catholic white American. She was American too btw—despite her American-born parents considering themselves as “Insert other Muslim country here.” That marriage was a disaster thanks to the unwillingness of her family to accept him. She caved eventually and her parents rewarded her with a new life in another city: fancy new place, new wardrobe, new car, etc.

I could go on, but I’ll stop here. As a shiksa whose future MIL enlisted the help of relatives to try to dissuade us from marrying (I won’t say how, but it was heavily orchestrated and blatant), I chalk it up to loss of control and fear of the unknown that some rigid older women have. It’s a thing, which is why the evil MIL stereotypes exist in every culture, etc.

Wow. I gently offer to you another explanation: since her son has married someone non-Jewish she literally will not have Jewish grandchildren. I’m not saying that it’s right to put pressure on your kids; it certainly isn’t. But it’s not very mysterious why she felt this way. It’s actually a huge, huge cultural loss. Hopefully realizing that can lead you towards some compassion.

If folks feel this way, then why raise your kids in the U.S.? Move to Israel, India, Saudi Arabia, Kenya, China, or wherever if having ethnically pure “[insert] grandchildren” is so important to you.

That’s the trade off you make when you come to America to live the good life. Don’t emotionally traumatize your otherwise lovely and competent adult kids/grandkids about it.

It’s not about ethnically pure kids at all. It’s about fearing total disappearance of a community and thousands of years of traditions and culture. That actually is traumatizing especially given the Holocaust because that fear came so close to reality. I converted partly because I understood the importance of that. I don’t think it’s the same at all as a culture with many people to keep it going. I am from such a culture myself and my parents were not fearful of any loss.

Thank you for explaining this so eloquently and compassionately. I think a lot of people just can’t understand.

I agree. Nicely done and compassionate.
But is there discussions about being more evolution minded? I know the community is in many other ways. Not proselytizing but making conversions or intra-faith easier. Carrying on meaning and tradition without a "do or die" attitude.
I mean most of us perform pagan rituals on holidays. Lots of ways to instill traditions.

[Anonymous]

Agree that their age is ambiguous. But the the main characters are all immature, so it feels like they are trying to play younger characters.

These issues are all things people face in their late 20s/early 30s, not mid 40s (which is usually about divorce & blended families)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kristen bell has something weird with her mouth - it’s the same issue due to filler or something that Christa miller has from scrubs.

The actors are good looking 40yo who are playing young 30s and it doesn’t work.

A worldly woman who grew up in Sherman oaks does and does not know what Shabbat is or anything about Judaism is not believable.

The emigration timeline for his parents does not really work with history, but whatever. Nor does the promotion politics of his job with the senior rabbi.

Seth cohen is beautiful.

I didn’t know who he was before this so I just looked him up. He’s attractive in this one but WAY more attractive without the beard.

He was in the OC. They should have cast Marissa as the flaky sister.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like it, but I’m unfortunately distracted by the fact that something has changed with her face that almost makes her look like a different person. It could just be that she’s shaping her eyebrows differently. I know, I know, this is absurd.

To be fair, he also looks different, but still looks like himself.

She looks really weird and I think it’s because she’s a 44 year old woman who is playing a 30-35 year old or something. She needs to move past the overgrown 20somerhimg role. I loved her in the good place and I think she has some acting skills, but she needs to stretch her wings a little and also let her face age more naturally. She’s gonna look llle a total plastic face by 50.

Is she actually playing a 35 year old? When I watched, I assumed they were both 40 something singles similar to their real life ages. The rabbis brother had a teenage daughter and was clearly meant to be late thirties/early forties.

I think he is supposed to be the younger son. Rebecca looked much younger than Joanne. Kristin Bell was just too old for the part. And Brody without the beard easily can pass as 35.

Both Bell and Brody are 44. They look their age, what’s wrong with that? I don’t understand the hyperfixation on their ages and why the female lead is supposed to be so young.

Justine Lupe (the sister, who I think is a great comedic actress) is 35.

It's because everyone here is obsessing about them having baaaabies. Because that's the most important thing in a marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I like it, but I’m unfortunately distracted by the fact that something has changed with her face that almost makes her look like a different person. It could just be that she’s shaping her eyebrows differently. I know, I know, this is absurd.

To be fair, he also looks different, but still looks like himself.

She looks really weird and I think it’s because she’s a 44 year old woman who is playing a 30-35 year old or something. She needs to move past the overgrown 20somerhimg role. I loved her in the good place and I think she has some acting skills, but she needs to stretch her wings a little and also let her face age more naturally. She’s gonna look llle a total plastic face by 50.

Is she actually playing a 35 year old? When I watched, I assumed they were both 40 something singles similar to their real life ages. The rabbis brother had a teenage daughter and was clearly meant to be late thirties/early forties.

I think he is supposed to be the younger son. Rebecca looked much younger than Joanne. Kristin Bell was just too old for the part. And Brody without the beard easily can pass as 35.

Both Bell and Brody are 44. They look their age, what’s wrong with that? I don’t understand the hyperfixation on their ages and why the female lead is supposed to be so young.

Justine Lupe (the sister, who I think is a great comedic actress) is 35.

It's because everyone here is obsessing about them having baaaabies. Because that's the most important thing in a marriage.

In a show full of clunky stereotypes, yes, everyone would have been obsessed with the rabbi having children.