Bullying form MCPS 230-35 Experience with the process

[Anonymous]

My DD was harassed yesterday at school by a group of girls. Nothing physical (locker slammed, names called). A Security assistant saw it and reported it to the office. DD gets called in today and is asked about it. We are called and the VP advises us to complete the MCPS 230-35 form or else nothing can be done. I read the form online and it seems like it is just an incident report. Once we submit the form, what is the process? Is there a meeting? Does the form go into student files? Any igood or bad experiences with the process? Any info would be helpful. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

I'd love to hear about this also. OP, how old is your D (elementary, middle, high school)? Our ES school is experiencing a lot of bullying incidents and no one seems to take them seriously. Maybe we should be using this form too.
Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd love to hear about this also. OP, how old is your D (elementary, middle, high school)? Our ES school is experiencing a lot of bullying incidents and no one seems to take them seriously. Maybe we should be using this form too.
Good luck.

If you are in MCPS, the bullying form is for all schools, including elementary.

[Anonymous]

Here is the link to the MCPS Bullying policy.

http://www.montgomeryschoolsmd.org/departments/policy/pdf/jhfra.pdf

As for experiences after reporting, it is going to vary greatly by school. The school principal is really the driving force. If he or she is strong and has a zero tolerance policy, you will likely see a good outcome. If not, you might feel like you've wasted your time. I've had both experiences.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Update on DD’s situation.

DD is in 7th grade – so it is a middle school situation.

I read the policy but I posted on here because I want some “real-life” perspective. I know that any policy is only as good as its enforcement. Anyhow, I spoke with the VP again yesterday and she told me that ALL reported bullying and harassment incidents must be recorded on the form. They will not even address the issue unless you are willing to complete the form. In DD’s case, DH submitted the form via email yesterday. While I was on here asking questions and pondering over the issue, he had already submiited the damn form! The offending girls were called into the office immediately and their parents were called. Because of student privacy rights, they do not tell the victims the details of the punishment. DD heard through the student grapevine that one of the girls had a long rap sheet and was suspended and the rest of the girls got week long detention. When dropping off DD today, the Security person that reported the incident came over to the car and told me that my DD was reluctant to report the incident and that is why he did. Also, the entire episode was captured on one of the hallway security cams.

[Anonymous]

I am so glad that you decided to report it. If I was in your shoes, I would have also worried about whether or not to fill out the form (fearing revenge on my child, etc). However, it sounds like these girls really are a menace and perhaps you will prevent them from doing to someone else. I hope all goes well for your daughter. Thanks for taking the time to update us.

[Anonymous]

And bravo to that Security Officer for reporting it!
I honestly don't know why kids are reluctant to report it, except perhaps for fear of being accused of "tattling."
My child is only in kindergarden, but I can see it happening, in small ways--some big kids took all her potato chips at soccer (after school--I think she was trying to share) and there's a small group of kids (a gang of 3) who pick on the kindergardeners, saying things like, "You're so small." My daughter IS small. I worry. The people in aftercare are aware of it, and have spoken to the kids, but I have no idea if it's pervasive or serious or just part of life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And bravo to that Security Officer for reporting it!
I honestly don't know why kids are reluctant to report it, except perhaps for fear of being accused of "tattling."
My child is only in kindergarden, but I can see it happening, in small ways--some big kids took all her potato chips at soccer (after school--I think she was trying to share) and there's a small group of kids (a gang of 3) who pick on the kindergardeners, saying things like, "You're so small." My daughter IS small. I worry. The people in aftercare are aware of it, and have spoken to the kids, but I have no idea if it's pervasive or serious or just part of life.

It goes beyond the fear of being labeled a tattler, though that term isnoutdated by mid elementary school. The reason kids are afraid of reporting it is that they're afraid it will make things worse - bullying will continue, but in a more covert fashion and will become more severe. Kids are afraid of being ostracized by other kids. And Kids are afraid that the adults won't or can't do anything about it. If that's how a kid is feeling, no way are they going to report it.

While us adults are saying bring bullying out of the closet, I don't see kids jumping on this bandwagon. And adults are ambivalent too. Look at OP who was angry that her husband reported it.

I am a PP whose child was seriously bullied in ES and had a few incidents in MS. The reaction to bullying varies so much based on who is in charge. If you have a school with strong leadership and a no nonsense policy on bullying, bullying will stop once it's reported. But, as my child experienced in ES, reporting was a worthless endeavor ecause no one did anything about it.

I heard that there is a new benchmark that schools are being evaluated on regarding bullying. My understanding of it is weak, but it has a component of student perception about whether bullying is a problem in their school and whether teachers are approachable about bullying incidents. If this is true, maybe we'll see some improvement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And bravo to that Security Officer for reporting it!
I honestly don't know why kids are reluctant to report it, except perhaps for fear of being accused of "tattling."
My child is only in kindergarden, but I can see it happening, in small ways--some big kids took all her potato chips at soccer (after school--I think she was trying to share) and there's a small group of kids (a gang of 3) who pick on the kindergardeners, saying things like, "You're so small." My daughter IS small. I worry. The people in aftercare are aware of it, and have spoken to the kids, but I have no idea if it's pervasive or serious or just part of life.

It goes beyond the fear of being labeled a tattler, though that term isnoutdated by mid elementary school. The reason kids are afraid of reporting it is that they're afraid it will make things worse - bullying will continue, but in a more covert fashion and will become more severe. Kids are afraid of being ostracized by other kids. And Kids are afraid that the adults won't or can't do anything about it. If that's how a kid is feeling, no way are they going to report it.

While us adults are saying bring bullying out of the closet, I don't see kids jumping on this bandwagon. And adults are ambivalent too. Look at OP who was angry that her husband reported it.
I am a PP whose child was seriously bullied in ES and had a few incidents in MS. The reaction to bullying varies so much based on who is in charge. If you have a school with strong leadership and a no nonsense policy on bullying, bullying will stop once it's reported. But, as my child experienced in ES, reporting was a worthless endeavor ecause no one did anything about it.

I heard that there is a new benchmark that schools are being evaluated on regarding bullying. My understanding of it is weak, but it has a component of student perception about whether bullying is a problem in their school and whether teachers are approachable about bullying incidents. If this is true, maybe we'll see some improvement.

OP here. For the record, I was not angry that DH reported the incident. If anything, I was annoyed that he submitted the form without mentioning it to me.