Did you redshirt your August girl? Why or why not?

[Anonymous]

Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

DP. I sent my September birthday DS on time, as did several of my friends. Others held their August/September birthday DCs back a year.

All of the on-time kids struggled, including mine, for years. All of the held-back kids did not struggle, in K or 1st or 2nd.

You can laugh off kindergarten if you like. From firsthand experience, I now know that it's developmentally inappropriate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

DP. I sent my September birthday DS on time, as did several of my friends. Others held their August/September birthday DCs back a year.

All of the on-time kids struggled, including mine, for years. All of the held-back kids did not struggle, in K or 1st or 2nd.

You can laugh off kindergarten if you like. From firsthand experience, I now know that it's developmentally inappropriate.

It's developmentally inappropriate to send your kid to school on time??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

DP. I sent my September birthday DS on time, as did several of my friends. Others held their August/September birthday DCs back a year.

All of the on-time kids struggled, including mine, for years. All of the held-back kids did not struggle, in K or 1st or 2nd.

You can laugh off kindergarten if you like. From firsthand experience, I now know that it's developmentally inappropriate.

It's developmentally inappropriate to send your kid to school on time??

The way they do kindergarten now, yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

DP. I sent my September birthday DS on time, as did several of my friends. Others held their August/September birthday DCs back a year.

All of the on-time kids struggled, including mine, for years. All of the held-back kids did not struggle, in K or 1st or 2nd.

You can laugh off kindergarten if you like. From firsthand experience, I now know that it's developmentally inappropriate.

It's developmentally inappropriate to send your kid to school on time??

The way they do kindergarten now, yes.

If that's the case, then why haven't they changed the cut off dates? If it's such a widespread problem, why isn't it addressed at a higher level within the school system?

Perhaps because it's NOT widespread and plenty of late summer/early fall kids do just fine, even if yours did not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

DP. I sent my September birthday DS on time, as did several of my friends. Others held their August/September birthday DCs back a year.

All of the on-time kids struggled, including mine, for years. All of the held-back kids did not struggle, in K or 1st or 2nd.

You can laugh off kindergarten if you like. From firsthand experience, I now know that it's developmentally inappropriate.

Wow interesting thanks for sharing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Two concrete instances where, having sent my August birthday DD "on time", had a negative social impact:

1. She was invited to go to summer camp with a few girls from her K class. She is not able to join because the camps require you to be 6 yo AND have completed K. (E.g., some Fairfax county camps, Arlinging P&R and Dynamic Gymnastics camps). They don't follow the school cut off. She's really sad about this.

2. Our swim club uses an August 1 cut off for swimming groups. She'll be grouped with the class below her, rather than her friends from school every single year. It's disappointing that she'll be excluded from being with her classmates.

These are not a big deal.

You can change the bday for camp. They don’t ask for a birth certificate.
For swimming last summer I asked if my August bday boy could swim up to swim with his friends and it was no problem. And a win win when he did well swimming 8&u in the meets.

I promise you that both are a big deal to my DD.

Re camp. I provided birth dates to Arlington and the gymnastics studio when my DD was 2. I can't just change it now. She can't attend those camps.

Re swim team. I don't know if they'll let her practice with her classmates and doubt that they'll give me an answer until they see her swim.

I’m a rule follower too but I have spoken with Fairfax Park authority and they said just change the birth date so he can be with kids in his grade and it’s not a big deal. Ask around I bet people will be flexible.

This might be a good solution for a mature kid, but she's really not there. K has been a struggle. I don't want to set her or the staff up for a bad situation where she's not ready. She needs to be in a camp for 5 yos with better staff ratios and closer supervision.

Your post makes no sense. You are first talking about a 2 year old vs. a 5 or older child. No, its a problem with a two year old but once they have completed a grade, its no longer a big deal.

I've never seen an issue with swim. If anything if your child swims year round, its an advantage as they can still compete between high school and college as they will not be 18. No issues here with swim or any camps. If K is a struggle, maybe you or the preschool didn't prepare her very well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

DP. I sent my September birthday DS on time, as did several of my friends. Others held their August/September birthday DCs back a year.

All of the on-time kids struggled, including mine, for years. All of the held-back kids did not struggle, in K or 1st or 2nd.

You can laugh off kindergarten if you like. From firsthand experience, I now know that it's developmentally inappropriate.

It's developmentally inappropriate to send your kid to school on time??

The way they do kindergarten now, yes.

How, if your child went to a good preschool and had active parents, in less there are delays or LD's your child should have basic writing, reading, know colors, numbers and letters. They should understand how to sit, follow directions and be in a classroom. We went to a preschool with many fall kids. The preschool prepared the kids and it wasn't an issue at all. The school (went through 2nd) had k and higher grades that were far more challenging than public and all the kids are doing well now. If it's not appropriate, don't send them. I think its not appropriate as they waste too much time, are not academic enough and the curriculum is not set up to meet all kids needs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

You say that like I haven't been constantly working on maturity and social skills with my DD. Yes, she is behind. Yes, we're working on it. Yes, she has an end of August birthday. It's a bad combo.

My DD walked at 8 months old, was running in circles. Many people have kids who don't walk until 18 months. Just like those parents couldn't make their 8 mo walk, I can't make my 5 yo more mature. I've tried and tried. I've been plenty embarassed at times. I've paid for therapists. They say she's normal, just young. She's often frustrated with herself and labels herself a bad kid. We're working on that too. I do wish I'd held her back. Theres no reason her life has to be this tough.

If it's so easy, why not have your kid skip a grade and see how they do? That is how life feels to her every day. She's always playing catch up. Always a bit behind. Always unvomfortable socially. I'm sure some August birthday kids are ready. Mine was not. Time will tell if she can close that gap (unless her K teacher recommends retention, which is possible).

[Anonymous]

we did not redshirt our july 30 girl. we considered it because she had a language delay and spent some time abroad so her English was lagging. she went to Montessori and we decided to see what happens in Montessori K and them enroll her into either first or in our public school. at the end of k she knew how to read and her English was good so we opted for first grade.

she is now in second grade, in gifted program and doing well in all subjects especially English (go figure). physically she is in the middle of the pack with some really huge girls in her class. socially she is doing fine - not the most popular kid but getting along with everyone. I am a bit worried about middle and high school but we will take as it come. she would have been very bored if she were on first grade now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

The thinking probably is why not give the advantage if given the choice. Life is hard enough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm really interested in if ANYONE has regretted waiting a year

I have posted I regret holding my child back. We were pressured to do it because of developmental delays and it was against my judgement knowing my child but child missed the cut off so not much choice. Child thrived that year and we basically homeschooled so child skipped K and went directly into 1st. If given the choice, which we did when we switched schools, child feels the are in the right grade and would be bored academically.

The only difference for us is child would probably had made the gifted program vs. not. I don't care about the gifted programs so its a non-issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

DP. I sent my September birthday DS on time, as did several of my friends. Others held their August/September birthday DCs back a year.

All of the on-time kids struggled, including mine, for years. All of the held-back kids did not struggle, in K or 1st or 2nd.

You can laugh off kindergarten if you like. From firsthand experience, I now know that it's developmentally inappropriate.

My first hand experience says the opposite. In fact I don’t believe that you sent your kid on time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

The thinking probably is why not give the advantage if given the choice. Life is hard enough.

How is it an advantage? Life is hard so you need to prepare your kids for life challenges. Its funny the same parents who scream about others being involved parents are so hands off that they do't realize their kids are not prepared till school time and then instead of working with them, simply hold them back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Reading these threads, I really wonder whether it's the kids who are not "ready" to start school or whether it's that the parents aren't ready to send the kids. Some of the examples given as reasons for redshirting are ridiculous - sports, camp, dealing with mean girls, worries about whether 10 years down the road she'll be able to handle high school boys. If you think being the youngest is going to be a challenge for your kid - so what? That's not necessarily a bad thing. Why not help your kid rise to the occasion by giving them skills to handle different kinds of environments?

And guess what? Your kids will be just fine even if they're the last ones in their friend group to get their driver's license, or they start high school at age 14, or they don't turn 18 until just before starting college.

You say that like I haven't been constantly working on maturity and social skills with my DD. Yes, she is behind. Yes, we're working on it. Yes, she has an end of August birthday. It's a bad combo.

My DD walked at 8 months old, was running in circles. Many people have kids who don't walk until 18 months. Just like those parents couldn't make their 8 mo walk, I can't make my 5 yo more mature. I've tried and tried. I've been plenty embarassed at times. I've paid for therapists. They say she's normal, just young. She's often frustrated with herself and labels herself a bad kid. We're working on that too. I do wish I'd held her back. Theres no reason her life has to be this tough.

If it's so easy, why not have your kid skip a grade and see how they do? That is how life feels to her every day. She's always playing catch up. Always a bit behind. Always unvomfortable socially. I'm sure some August birthday kids are ready. Mine was not. Time will tell if she can close that gap (unless her K teacher recommends retention, which is possible).

Repeating K might not be a bad idea