No children allowed at family members wedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Um, so you “so no” people, you realize you can RSVP “no”, right? It’s a standard reply you don’t even need to be personal about.

We do! Just promise not to pout as some did.

Again, some more. NONE OF YOU ARE OP, OR OP'S COUSIN. This isn't a general "how do you feel about no-kids weddings" thread. This is a specific scenario for a specific OP and her specific relative. So stop with your meaningless anecdote pile-ons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was 7 months pregnant, my brother announced he was getting married in the Dominican when baby would be 9 weeks. Oh, and absolutely no kids, including mine. So we decided not to go. Too much of a hassle. Even if baby had been allowed, I'm not sure we would have gone, because of the hassle of getting passport for baby, general travel with a kid that nursed every 2-3 hours......

Anyways, that was 3 years ago and my brother hasn't spoken to me since. Not that I wasn't already aware that he is a self-absorbed prick, but come on.

Seriously? What do tour parents think about your self absorbed brat of a brother.
To be clear, I don't think he's a jerk for planning a no kids destination wedding when you had a newborn. I think he's a jerk for giving you the silent treatment ever since you correctly concluded it wouldn't work for you to attend.

Let's just say there's a reason he's a self-absorbed brat. My mom was furious we didn't attend. "You're not even trying to make it!" C'est la vie. My family is borderline dysfunctional. It hurt me for a couple of days that my mom would attack me, but then I remembered this is all standard operating procedure and there's a reason I live 2,000 miles away. FTR, we see my parents in very small doses.

Enjoy your parents as much as you can.

[Anonymous]

I'm really confused here - you people can afford to fly your kids out by plane but can't budget for 1-2 nights with a babysitter?

Just leave the kids at home and treat it is a date night weekend...unless you don't have those, in which case don't go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm really confused here - you people can afford to fly your kids out by plane but can't budget for 1-2 nights with a babysitter?

Just leave the kids at home and treat it is a date night weekend...unless you don't have those, in which case don't go.

Um, 48 hours with a babysitter at 20$/hr is close to $1000. You probably don’t want a 15$/hr teenager if you’re going to leave your kids for 2 days. Not inconsequential for relatives with whom you’re not close enough to have your kids invited.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm really confused here - you people can afford to fly your kids out by plane but can't budget for 1-2 nights with a babysitter?

Just leave the kids at home and treat it is a date night weekend...unless you don't have those, in which case don't go.

I could afford it; I'm just not about to spend my limited money and vacation/weekend time on the wedding of someone who doesn't actually consider my family to be family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm really confused here - you people can afford to fly your kids out by plane but can't budget for 1-2 nights with a babysitter?

Just leave the kids at home and treat it is a date night weekend...unless you don't have those, in which case don't go.

I could afford it; I'm just not about to spend my limited money and vacation/weekend time on the wedding of someone who doesn't actually consider my family to be family.

See it like that if you want. That's your choice. Some people choose to be insulted and wounded and offended. I guess you're that type.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Um, so you “so no” people, you realize you can RSVP “no”, right? It’s a standard reply you don’t even need to be personal about.

I believe some of us have suggested OP not go.

It's really not a big deal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm really confused here - you people can afford to fly your kids out by plane but can't budget for 1-2 nights with a babysitter?

Just leave the kids at home and treat it is a date night weekend...unless you don't have those, in which case don't go.

I could afford it; I'm just not about to spend my limited money and vacation/weekend time on the wedding of someone who doesn't actually consider my family to be family.

So stop whining about it and don't. It's really okay. But the not whining part is key.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm really confused here - you people can afford to fly your kids out by plane but can't budget for 1-2 nights with a babysitter?

Just leave the kids at home and treat it is a date night weekend...unless you don't have those, in which case don't go.

You are confused about the reason why 48 hours of nanny time is more expensive than a pair of plane tickets?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm really confused here - you people can afford to fly your kids out by plane but can't budget for 1-2 nights with a babysitter?

Just leave the kids at home and treat it is a date night weekend...unless you don't have those, in which case don't go.

Um, 48 hours with a babysitter at 20$/hr is close to $1000. You probably don’t want a 15$/hr teenager if you’re going to leave your kids for 2 days. Not inconsequential for relatives with whom you’re not close enough to have your kids invited.

No one books a weekend babysitter for an hourly rate. Negotiate a flat fee and expenses which I guarantee will be cheaper than round-trip flights for 2+ kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My cousin had a no kids wedding when my DS was 5 months old. We wouldn't leave him, and we stayed home. NBD, and 17 years later cousin and I are still friends...

I brought a breastfeeding infant along to a wedding that had a "no kids" invite. We didn't have any repercussions. If the baby had caused a fuss, I would have taken her right out. Of course, there were children there anyway, the flower girls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My cousin had a no kids wedding when my DS was 5 months old. We wouldn't leave him, and we stayed home. NBD, and 17 years later cousin and I are still friends...

I brought a breastfeeding infant along to a wedding that had a "no kids" invite. We didn't have any repercussions. If the baby had caused a fuss, I would have taken her right out. Of course, there were children there anyway, the flower girls.

Why do you feel you were specially entitled to disobey the couple’s wishes? Obviously flower girls are a different story than your random baby. I’m sure you got the side eye from people; you’re incredibly, incredibly rude.

[Anonymous]

Your cousin and her bf sound like dipshits. There is nothing wrong with not being able to afford a nice wedding, but trying to have a nice wedding at the expense of children not attending is pathetic. HELL NO

[Anonymous]

I love "no kids" invites. It's an easy decline without any questions asked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My cousin had a no kids wedding when my DS was 5 months old. We wouldn't leave him, and we stayed home. NBD, and 17 years later cousin and I are still friends...

I brought a breastfeeding infant along to a wedding that had a "no kids" invite. We didn't have any repercussions. If the baby had caused a fuss, I would have taken her right out. Of course, there were children there anyway, the flower girls.

Why do you feel you were specially entitled to disobey the couple’s wishes? Obviously flower girls are a different story than your random baby. I’m sure you got the side eye from people; you’re incredibly, incredibly rude.

+1. Just because no one publicly called you out or asked up to leave doesn't mean that your disrespect behavior wasn't noted. You should have either declined or pumped some bottles and left your baby with a caregiver.