“Shamed” for Thanksgiving contribution to school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess I'm the only person on earth who loves the store brand Neufatchel cheese.

We have beaten this to death but obvs that person is a jerk. If I had a relationship with an admin, I'm bring it up. If not, I wouldn't.

I like Neufchatel too, for bagels, but if you’re baking with it — like for a cheesecake — you have to use the full fat regular cream cheese.

[Anonymous]

Please that's not something you should bring up with the administration.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:in high school I worked as a cashier at a grocery store (anyone remember Price Choppers?). At the first of the month, when people received their food stamps, they would buy so many expensive items (Oreos, shrimp, lobster, etc. lol at the Oreos. we were poor and weren't able to buy them). and by the end of the month, a lot of these people were scraping by. as the old saying goes - chickens today, feathers tomorrow.

many people aren't taught how to budget, or how the off brands are of the same quality, and how to make their $ go further. This is in the cycle of those who are poor. They see the increased value of "Philadelphia" vs Wegmans brand (which, is always better).

OP - this was the admin's shortcomings. hopefully she'll see this thread and recognize herself.

Yes this. My sweet relative (she's not judging them) teaches people on food stamps how to budget. She takes them grocery shopping and shows them. They do meal planning together for their families. Most of them just weren't raised in a family environment and have no idea how to budget, cook, shop. It was eye opening for her. Btw, she easily made up food plans for families that stayed within food stamp limits, but yeah it did involve cooking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Occasional recipient PP here. I must say for bank recipients aren’t as hungry as some people think they are. Bad food is cheap and abundant in the US, which is good because no one is hungry but also bad because having a lot of cheap low quality food is not really great for nutrition or development or happiness.
So yeah most poor people just can’t afford nice things. They do have cheap earbuds, cheap canned food, and cheap cream cheese. Eggs, butter, and milk are ok generic I guess.
It’s just the truth, you don’t have to donate if you don’t like that your cheap stuff isn’t appreciated.
Sorry if this sounds ungrateful, it was not my intention. I am actually very grateful for SNAP where you can buy whatever you need and not whatever is given to you

So do I, and my kids are in private school. Your money would go further if you weren’t so wedded to the idea of brand names.

Good for you. Even if I only ate canned beans I wouldn’t be able to afford it. I am just saying that cheap stuff they already have

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think I’ll be donating food outside of the local DC area, outside of the country where people really do need my help. I shop generic and try to be frugal. I guess the snap and government benefits is all they need, and they do not need donations.

A small correction - they don’t need cheap donations

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She shouldn’t have told you straight to your face, but as an occasional recipient of food boxes I always appreciate when I get something by well known brands. First, it’s more consistent, and second, I feel like the person didn’t think of me as less than. I am sure you got what you usually get for yourself, and I would never ever say anything but just so you know, it does matter. Of course it doesn’t mean you should immediately change your ways.

You are less than. You're receiving free food from someone who paid for it and gave it to you because you couldn't afford to buy it yourself. Are we supposed to pretend you're equals? You're not. Nothing wrong with that -- I've been there myself -- but it is what it is.

Yeah but don’t expect me to be grateful for your genetic stuff eh

Ugh. So ungrateful. You need to work on that. Your attitude is the reason so many don't want to donate to the poor.

It’s totally ok with me if people don’t donate cheap stuff. Unfortunately much of it is either hoarded by the elderly or sits out on the benches near the low income housing complex.
Or worse, near the dumpsters

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Occasional recipient PP here. I must say for bank recipients aren’t as hungry as some people think they are. Bad food is cheap and abundant in the US, which is good because no one is hungry but also bad because having a lot of cheap low quality food is not really great for nutrition or development or happiness.
So yeah most poor people just can’t afford nice things. They do have cheap earbuds, cheap canned food, and cheap cream cheese. Eggs, butter, and milk are ok generic I guess.
It’s just the truth, you don’t have to donate if you don’t like that your cheap stuff isn’t appreciated.
Sorry if this sounds ungrateful, it was not my intention. I am actually very grateful for SNAP where you can buy whatever you need and not whatever is given to you

So do I, and my kids are in private school. Your money would go further if you weren’t so wedded to the idea of brand names.

Good for you. Even if I only ate canned beans I wouldn’t be able to afford it. I am just saying that cheap stuff they already have

Well then they don’t need the extra food. Good donations are intended to ensure people do not go hungry - not as a way to ensure they have name brand foods to eat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Occasional recipient PP here. I must say for bank recipients aren’t as hungry as some people think they are. Bad food is cheap and abundant in the US, which is good because no one is hungry but also bad because having a lot of cheap low quality food is not really great for nutrition or development or happiness.
So yeah most poor people just can’t afford nice things. They do have cheap earbuds, cheap canned food, and cheap cream cheese. Eggs, butter, and milk are ok generic I guess.
It’s just the truth, you don’t have to donate if you don’t like that your cheap stuff isn’t appreciated.
Sorry if this sounds ungrateful, it was not my intention. I am actually very grateful for SNAP where you can buy whatever you need and not whatever is given to you

So do I, and my kids are in private school. Your money would go further if you weren’t so wedded to the idea of brand names.

Good for you. Even if I only ate canned beans I wouldn’t be able to afford it. I am just saying that cheap stuff they already have

Well, thanks for letting us all know that we shouldn't be donating to foodbanks, because the recipients don't need it. There were times in my life where I actually WAS hungry, and I would have been thrilled to get generic food--but I didn't know where and how to find a food bank (pre-internet days) or if I even would have been eligible as a client (I was a student, and didn't have children or anything.)

-new poster

[Anonymous]

Thanks to this thread I chuckle when I see Philadelphia Cream Cheese at the store. I buy store brands!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks to this thread I chuckle when I see Philadelphia Cream Cheese at the store. I buy store brands!

Just thought of this thread as I was making myself a bagel this morning. I finally finished the generic cream cheese and opened the philly-it is so much better!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Occasional recipient PP here. I must say for bank recipients aren’t as hungry as some people think they are. Bad food is cheap and abundant in the US, which is good because no one is hungry but also bad because having a lot of cheap low quality food is not really great for nutrition or development or happiness.
So yeah most poor people just can’t afford nice things. They do have cheap earbuds, cheap canned food, and cheap cream cheese. Eggs, butter, and milk are ok generic I guess.
It’s just the truth, you don’t have to donate if you don’t like that your cheap stuff isn’t appreciated.
Sorry if this sounds ungrateful, it was not my intention. I am actually very grateful for SNAP where you can buy whatever you need and not whatever is given to you

Agree 100%. No one is starving to death in the US. The low income population have the highest rates of obesity. They are eating (a lot) of cheap low quality food already. They don't need another 10 boxes of .89 cent mac and cheese. If you are going to bother donating, make it good quality food that is nourishing.

What shelf-stable nutritious food do you recommend?

Beans (canned or dry), oatmeal, quinoa, lentils, pretty much any bagged whole grain, canned vegetables without added salt and canned fruits in water, powdered milk, natural peanut butter or other nut butters without added fillers/sugars/oils, tomato sauces, all natural no sugar beef jerky, dehydrated fruits (TJ sells large bags of dehydrated apples), nuts, herbs and spices.

I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess these families might prefer mac and cheese for Thanksgiving over lentils and quinoa, even if you think they should eat more healthfully.

I agree. And trying to force healthier choices on them is paternalism.

[Anonymous]

School secretaries are notoriously mean and they need that tough exterior to do their jobs. You will encounter much worse. Just smile snd thank them profusely no matter what they do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:School secretaries are notoriously mean and they need that tough exterior to do their jobs. You will encounter much worse. Just smile snd thank them profusely no matter what they do.

Why? They are the face of the school and should be friendly / welcoming. I see no need to be overly nice to them when they are perpetually grouchy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I always buy generic for myself, but I always buy name brands for food banks and contributions. The reason is that I had a friend in college who had grown up poor enough to use a food bank regularly and he said that this was something kids always noticed about food bank food--they weren't "good enough" to deserve the brand names.

On an entire Thanksgiving meal for a family of 8 this might add $20 to the price. That's fine with me.

Thank you for the insight. I would guess most recipients are poor but not starving. Maybe more in need of some happiness (and a few saved dollars) than just some nutrition. Maybe next time I will donate brand names.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:School secretaries are notoriously mean and they need that tough exterior to do their jobs. You will encounter much worse. Just smile snd thank them profusely no matter what they do.

So true about that job. Smile and give a sincere thank you. Give a bit of happiness to someone in a miserable position.