"Super stinky car" in carpool - WWYD

[Anonymous]

My first grader goes to school 35 minutes away and this year I was thrilled to be able to carpool with another family two times a week. This saves me an hour and a half to two hours (depending on traffic). Problem is my 6 year old told me this morning that he doesn't want to do the carpool anymore because their car is "super stinky" and the seats are "all sticky.". I haven't been able to go in there myself, but I have seen that the car could use a good clean. My son has a strong reaction to bad smells - gagging, etc. What should I do? I can't ask this other family to clean their car, but I would hate to end the carpool (and am actually unsure of how I could even do this). Thoughts?

[Anonymous]

Let your son tough it out. He will laugh about it when he's older.

[Anonymous]

What is the smell? If it is cigarette smoke personally I'd be concerned.

[Anonymous]

Unless it's cigarette smoke, or Deet, your son needs to learn to deal.

It doesn't sound like he's actually gagging in the car, because if he had gagged only once, the other family would have cleaned their car. (It would have been pretty funny to see, actually, not your son gagging but their own realization about how dirty their car is.)

The options you mention, like asking the other family to clean their car, or ending the carpool, seem like overreactions.

[Anonymous]

I helped with door duty at my son's preschool, and I remember this one lady who would pull up in her minivan. It was a nice, new model. But when she'd slide the door open, the back floor was covered in chicken bones!!!! The whole car stank. I mean who does that? Who eats chicken and tosses the bones on the floor of their car?

[Anonymous]

As the owner of a car that had a rouge sippy cup of milk in it for months (rolled up under the seat then got trapped in the coils of the underside of the seat), I say tell your ds to suck it up. I am sure they know the car smells. You could also give them a gift card for an auto detail job. Or put Vicks vapor rub under your son's nose. As I tell my ds, owner of aforementioned sippy cup, life is full of bad smells get used to it because we will be in Paris this Spring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unless it's cigarette smoke, or Deet, your son needs to learn to deal.

It doesn't sound like he's actually gagging in the car, because if he had gagged only once, the other family would have cleaned their car. (It would have been pretty funny to see, actually, not your son gagging but their own realization about how dirty their car is.)

The options you mention, like asking the other family to clean their car, or ending the carpool, seem like overreactions.

What's wrong with smelling Deet? My understanding is that it's considered safe to apply to kids in concentrations up to 30%, but in any case I've never heard of any health problems involved with smelling it. Can you point me to a source, PP? Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Why can't you ask the other family to clean their car? Your kids is spending hours a week in there.

[Anonymous]

this one lady who would pull up in her minivan. It was a nice, new model. But when she'd slide the door open, the back floor was covered in chicken bones!!!! The whole car stank. I mean who does that? Who eats chicken and tosses the bones on the floor of their car?

I have a mental picture of who does that.

[Anonymous]

Rub some Vaporub under his nose before he gets in the car.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless it's cigarette smoke, or Deet, your son needs to learn to deal.

It doesn't sound like he's actually gagging in the car, because if he had gagged only once, the other family would have cleaned their car. (It would have been pretty funny to see, actually, not your son gagging but their own realization about how dirty their car is.)

The options you mention, like asking the other family to clean their car, or ending the carpool, seem like overreactions.

What's wrong with smelling Deet? My understanding is that it's considered safe to apply to kids in concentrations up to 30%, but in any case I've never heard of any health problems involved with smelling it. Can you point me to a source, PP? Thanks!

OK, I guess I was thinking that smelling DEET would be an indication that he might be getting skin contact in serious quantities, but I wasn't thinking overly much about it. I stand corrected if I implied that merely smelling the stuff is a problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why can't you ask the other family to clean their car? Your kids is spending hours a week in there.

Because they'll be insulted, whether or not she's right. It's sort of like telling somebody they have BO. Worse, they have the easy out of just concluding she thinks her kid is a special snowflake. She can't win. The inevitable outcome will be that the carpool will end, but they stopped it, not her.

[Anonymous]

As a nanny I've been the stinky car....and 99% of the time it's a rogue sippy or carton of milk or snack the kids left behind. Honestly, I'd be more worried about whether there are projectiles in the car....what's roaming around loose in there causing the smell? You don't want anything in the car that you don't want hitting you at 60 MPH. If they get rid of projectiles there's a good chance the smell would go with it. (Unless it's milk that spilled into the carpet or something.)

As for how to address it....yikes. No envy for your situation there! I would walk DS to the car and look at it. If you see a lot of "stuff" around in the car...garbage, toys, cups etc. I'd just mention that you went to a carseat safety checkpoint and they mentioned you should have loose items secured in a box in the back of the vehicle so as not to hit you on the head in the event of an accident. If you don't see a lot of loose items, just tell your son to roll with it. It's a good life lesson for him!

[Anonymous]

Ridiculous.... I'm sure he's just saying it's stinky b/c it isn't pristine like yours. Suck it up, kid. I'd be embarrassed to bring that up with the other parents. Just tell him to deal with it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let your son tough it out. He will laugh about it when he's older.

Agreed! It'll make a great story.

But, yes, your son has to tough it out.