Nurse-in at Hirshhorn on 2/12 from 10-12

[Anonymous]

Wow...this is my first time visiting this blog. I was concerned what I might find here after hearing about the mommy wars here both on other blogs as well as the Kojo show. I can see that I don't need to return. You people are nasty and hateful. There is no reason this needed to devolved into the flame war that it did.

Feel free to flame away at me. I won't be returning to dcurbanmoms. Everything I have heard said about you was right!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow...this is my first time visiting this blog. I was concerned what I might find here after hearing about the mommy wars here both on other blogs as well as the Kojo show. I can see that I don't need to return. You people are nasty and hateful. There is no reason this needed to devolved into the flame war that it did.

Feel free to flame away at me. I won't be returning to dcurbanmoms. Everything I have heard said about you was right!

You might as well stay. From the tone of your post, it is clear you belong here. You can run but you just can't hide.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow...this is my first time visiting this blog. I was concerned what I might find here after hearing about the mommy wars here both on other blogs as well as the Kojo show. I can see that I don't need to return. You people are nasty and hateful. There is no reason this needed to devolved into the flame war that it did.

Feel free to flame away at me. I won't be returning to dcurbanmoms. Everything I have heard said about you was right!

Contribute with something positive, or leave. That's what I think. If you post something like this after reading one thread, you will miss out on all that is good and helpful.

Don't judge us until you know us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I disagree with the PP. I don't think we need to be "obnoxious" about it. Our rights are protected as breastfeeding moms. I am not a tit terrorist, and feel quite happy that I can visit any public building in the district and nurse. I don't think a "nurse in" is necessary, or helpful. Why fight a battle we have already won? Why let others paint a picture of us using broad strokes?

I am responding specifically to the husband of a nursing wife. I appreciate you being her advocate, but disagree with much of what you said.

Lactivists are hell bent on using the same strategies that were necessary and warranted in other struggles (Civil Rights, GLBT rallies, etc.). I marched and made posters in these instances.

I won't do it for this cause. I am a nursing mom, and realize there is a lot more to get upset about and devote my energy towards.

That said, I am also curious about the wisdom behind having a "nurse in" after the Hirrshorn has said they support and encourage the patronage of nursing moms. I love this museum, and perhaps they can cast this as performance art. But I am wondering how the organizers will reframe an ostensible protest into. . .what exactly?

I heart you.

[Anonymous]

You can RSVP to the nurse-in at http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=187870741235066. The original intent was and still is to promote awareness of breastfeeding in public.

[Anonymous]

This is the husband who posted about being obnoxious. I made that post before being aware that the Hirshhorn apologized. However, my statement still stands. Clearly not only a nurse-in, but the threat of a nurse-in, is enough to get action. The law is clearly on the nursing mother's side, but not all of society is, and the law is not always clearly understood and enforced properly, as was the case at the Hirshhorn where the mother was told to nurse on the toilet. We hear about these incidents all the time, and they will continue, regardless of the law, unless people stand up and make the public aware. You may consider that being obnoxious, but it is a cause worthy of being obnoxious about, and, as proven in the Hirshhorn case, it gets results.

Also, "tit terrorists," seriously!? A bunch of women going to a public place and quietly breastfeeding their babies? No protest signs, no blocked entrances, not even breaking the law. Hardly "terrorist" acts by any stretch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow...this is my first time visiting this blog. I was concerned what I might find here after hearing about the mommy wars here both on other blogs as well as the Kojo show. I can see that I don't need to return. You people are nasty and hateful. There is no reason this needed to devolved into the flame war that it did.

Feel free to flame away at me. I won't be returning to dcurbanmoms. Everything I have heard said about you was right!

Aw, stick around! You need a thick skin to hang out on some threads, or at least the ability to let some comments roll off your back, but once you buikd that up, there's plenty of usefu people and posts here.

Just pop on in to the food forum, or the exercise one, to get your feet wet, and for a while, don't open any thread that has more than 4 pages of responses -- those are usually the ones with the flame wars, which BTW is what they are, not Mommy Wars..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is the husband who posted about being obnoxious. I made that post before being aware that the Hirshhorn apologized. However, my statement still stands. Clearly not only a nurse-in, but the threat of a nurse-in, is enough to get action. The law is clearly on the nursing mother's side, but not all of society is, and the law is not always clearly understood and enforced properly, as was the case at the Hirshhorn where the mother was told to nurse on the toilet. We hear about these incidents all the time, and they will continue, regardless of the law, unless people stand up and make the public aware. You may consider that being obnoxious, but it is a cause worthy of being obnoxious about, and, as proven in the Hirshhorn case, it gets results.

Also, "tit terrorists," seriously!? A bunch of women going to a public place and quietly breastfeeding their babies? No protest signs, no blocked entrances, not even breaking the law. Hardly "terrorist" acts by any stretch.

Yes, getting your way via threats is terrorism. Yuck. I would be proud to participate in a letter writing campaign instead. But it was not the threat of a nurse-in; per their post here, they had already contacted the mother involved and spoken to the guard.

People need to realize that nursing in public is not a bid deal. A nurse-in is the opposite of the message we need to send if you want nursing to be more acceptable. Being offensive is just alienating.

[Anonymous]

But why is it offensive?

[Anonymous]

First let me apologize for not reading all thirteen pages and also for possibly being an idiot-but I am always totally baffled by why certain people think BF is "disgusting" and should be hidden. What exactly is so offensive about a mother feeding a baby with a body part that was designed expressly for that purpose? Of course I'm aware of how highly sexualized breasts are in most cultures, but BFing is not a sexual act. I'm not running for Miss America either but why don't more people find this to be a beautiful thing? With all the violent images innundating us in the media, doesn't seeing a mom BFing make anyone feel a little better about the world? I'll never understand why this particular act makes any thinking or educated person feel uncomfortable. I'm also not for or against the nurse-in at the HH, I am not a lactivist activist or a granola freak, I just wish someone would explain to me in a clear and logical manner why this sight is so offensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First let me apologize for not reading all thirteen pages and also for possibly being an idiot-but I am always totally baffled by why certain people think BF is "disgusting" and should be hidden. What exactly is so offensive about a mother feeding a baby with a body part that was designed expressly for that purpose? Of course I'm aware of how highly sexualized breasts are in most cultures, but BFing is not a sexual act. I'm not running for Miss America either but why don't more people find this to be a beautiful thing? With all the violent images innundating us in the media, doesn't seeing a mom BFing make anyone feel a little better about the world? I'll never understand why this particular act makes any thinking or educated person feel uncomfortable. I'm also not for or against the nurse-in at the HH, I am not a lactivist activist or a granola freak, I just wish someone would explain to me in a clear and logical manner why this sight is so offensive.

Yes, please do bother to read the thread so we don't have to over everything again and again for the sake of every selfish poster who feels like getting their two cents in at the end of 13 pages, even though it has already been said over and over and over. Please do.

[Anonymous]

No one is going to be able to explain logically why breastfeeding in public is offensive. Their simply is no explanation that makes sense.

[Anonymous]

OK, just read all thirteen pages and still don't understand what you are so angry about. What is it about seeing a woman BF that makes you so uncomfortable that you feel you should be allowed to determine when and where she does it? Please tell me without inserting some type of religious 'morality' into the argument. As an educated person, what exactly is it that bothers you about seeing someone BFing? I'm really just curious here.

[Anonymous]

Hi -

I'm LJ Pelham, and I'm the organizer of the nurse-in at the Hirshhorn. I'm so thrilled that this issue has garnered so much attention and discussion. Raising awareness is one of the main reasons I organized the nurse-in!

I'd like to offer some additional information and clarify a few things:

First, there's a great list of state/territory breastfeeding laws on the National Conference of State Legislatures website: http://www.ncsl.org/default.aspx?tabid=14389. So, if you want to know what the law is where you live, check it out.

Second, there is a federal law that permits women to breastfeed on federal property and in federal buildings so long as the woman has the right to be there. Code of Federal Regulations, Title 41, Sec. 102-74.426

Third, I've been asked whether the nurse-in is still on since the Hirshhorn has apologized.

The nurse-in was not organized to elicit an apology from the Hirshhorn or the Smithsonian. The fact that they have apologized is wonderful. The Hirshhorn and Smithsonian have really stepped up and made right a bad situation, and the mom who this happened to is satisfied with their response. Situation resolved.

The nurse-in was not organized as a protest either. We already have the law that protects our right to nurse in public (and private) in DC, and the Smithsonian has a policy that supports that right. The Smithsonian has taken steps to address and correct the situation. So, really, what’s left to protest?

Besides, this situation did not happen because we lack protective laws or because the Smithsonian doesn't have a policy about this. Instead, this situation happened because of a lack of awareness, a lack of education.

Now, I suppose we could protest the lack of education . . . But wouldn’t it be better just to educate?

So, I feel we (the community that supports breastfeeding) have work to do -- in educating about the right to breastfeed, in raising awareness about the policies and laws that are in effect, in sparking discussions on the benefits of breastfeeding (which is why we have those laws in the first place) and in showing support for those who choose to do so. Who better to do that than those who benefit from and are protected by these policies and laws? And, what better opportunity than this?

This is a sensitive (and emotional) subject for many. And, there's a lot of momentum as a result of this situation. My hope (and vision in organizing the nurse-in) is to focus on how we might fill the gap, fix the problem, and educate. We found the need, now let’s meet it. Can we find positive ways to use the momentum of this event to raise awareness in our own communities? Because if this can happen at the Hirshhorn, this can happen anywhere.

So, that’s the purpose of the nurse-in --- to raise awareness, to educate about the policies and laws that are in effect, to spark discussion, to show support for nursing in public, and to bring closure to this situation in a positive, peaceful and healing way.

So, yes, the nurse-in is still on. And, we welcome you to join us.

LJ Pelham

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OK, just read all thirteen pages and still don't understand what you are so angry about. What is it about seeing a woman BF that makes you so uncomfortable that you feel you should be allowed to determine when and where she does it? Please tell me without inserting some type of religious 'morality' into the argument. As an educated person, what exactly is it that bothers you about seeing someone BFing? I'm really just curious here.

I find it hard to believe that you read 13 pages and this is what you came away with. No one is saying breastfeeding in public should be illegal because it makes people uncomfortable. And the poster who said there is no logical explanation for why it makes people uncomfortable, even though they were being snide, was right -- it's not logical, it's emotional. Most people find it weird and it makes them uncomfortable.

A nurse-in is aggressive. It is 'in your face.' The 'education' aspect is an excuse. There are much better ways to 'educate' people that there are laws on the books that allow breastfeeding in public that do not involve alienating people. WHY is that alienating? WHY does it make people uncomfortable? Who knows -- and who cares. It would be a lot easier to take the time and effort for a few people to learn to be discreet than it would take to change the attitudes and feelings of the majority of society.