Question for Parents of Students Admitted to Top 25 Colleges

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread has been wild to read. I am not in DC, but my kid attends a public high school in an affluent suburb on the west coast. Everyone I know has a college counselor. Yes, everyone. It's like orthodontics; yes, occasionally someone does not need it, but I think 80-90% of parents and kids could use some help and there's zero shame around using a college counselor. That said, it's a huge industry and there are many affordable options (unlike orthos).

It’s sad this board has been completely taken over by maga. They want moms stay home to take care of larlos’ college applications. They want to feed to moms fear and anxiety, that nothing is good enough until you drop everything professional and tend to a silly college admission game themselves.

huh? my kid is at an ivy unhooked and most of their friends there have dual working parent households. The vast majority of the kids who get ivy+ admissions from our HS are dual working parents, often at least one a doctor or lawyer. No one is staying home to be a college counselor to their kid. true top kids do not need paid college counseling services or extensive advice from mom or dad. they read all the websites of the schools on their own and from that one can get a great idea of what each school is seeking. tours and admission-officer sessions also give hints. top kids take notes and refer to them when writing apps.
you underestimate the level of preparedness and focus of the very top high schoolers.

THIS! If your kid can't do it on their own, they don't have what it takes. Sorry to inform you tiger parents that you can't force brilliance.

+++ and if you do micromanage them and pay someone big $ to try to force it ..what happens if they get lucky and get in to T10/ivy? they will be crushed by the competition once there especially if they want top law, top phD, med school, MBB, etc. the next level of the game is entirely different and your kid has to have the intelligence, drive & discipline just to keep above average at these places.

Not true at all. It’s how the world works.
Lots of people get their jobs and move on up through the world (MBB/PE/AM) without what you deemed to be the requisite “drive and discipline”.

My kids got their internships and jobs through connections…

Most definitely. But you are not going to win a case or perform a successful surgery because of a connection. For success in some disciplines you need to put up or shut up at some point. Some disciplines.

Exactly. My kids are premed and engineering and their summer internships have been extremely competitive and depend on prior research and recs from professors. The ivy name helps but not in competition with the other ivy students! It is how you do in class, what classes you have taken, lab, and research on campus, not who you know. Professors do not agree to write recs for everyone, especially the old-school ones. Same with one of their GFs who is prelaw: she worked her butt off to get the high gpa (3.9) her advisor said opened doors for the prestigious prelaw internships. She is now at what most consider to be the top law school in the country, and all the others from this ivy who are headed to the top law or med are 100% grit, drive, discipline.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread has been wild to read. I am not in DC, but my kid attends a public high school in an affluent suburb on the west coast. Everyone I know has a college counselor. Yes, everyone. It's like orthodontics; yes, occasionally someone does not need it, but I think 80-90% of parents and kids could use some help and there's zero shame around using a college counselor. That said, it's a huge industry and there are many affordable options (unlike orthos).

It’s sad this board has been completely taken over by maga. They want moms stay home to take care of larlos’ college applications. They want to feed to moms fear and anxiety, that nothing is good enough until you drop everything professional and tend to a silly college admission game themselves.

huh? my kid is at an ivy unhooked and most of their friends there have dual working parent households. The vast majority of the kids who get ivy+ admissions from our HS are dual working parents, often at least one a doctor or lawyer. No one is staying home to be a college counselor to their kid. true top kids do not need paid college counseling services or extensive advice from mom or dad. they read all the websites of the schools on their own and from that one can get a great idea of what each school is seeking. tours and admission-officer sessions also give hints. top kids take notes and refer to them when writing apps.
you underestimate the level of preparedness and focus of the very top high schoolers.

THIS! If your kid can't do it on their own, they don't have what it takes. Sorry to inform you tiger parents that you can't force brilliance.

+++ and if you do micromanage them and pay someone big $ to try to force it ..what happens if they get lucky and get in to T10/ivy? they will be crushed by the competition once there especially if they want top law, top phD, med school, MBB, etc. the next level of the game is entirely different and your kid has to have the intelligence, drive & discipline just to keep above average at these places.

Not true at all. It’s how the world works.
Lots of people get their jobs and move on up through the world (MBB/PE/AM) without what you deemed to be the requisite “drive and discipline”.

My kids got their internships and jobs through connections…

Most definitely. But you are not going to win a case or perform a successful surgery because of a connection. For success in some disciplines you need to put up or shut up at some point. Some disciplines.

Exactly. My kids are premed and engineering and their summer internships have been extremely competitive and depend on prior research and recs from professors. The ivy name helps but not in competition with the other ivy students! It is how you do in class, what classes you have taken, lab, and research on campus, not who you know. Professors do not agree to write recs for everyone, especially the old-school ones. Same with one of their GFs who is prelaw: she worked her butt off to get the high gpa (3.9) her advisor said opened doors for the prestigious prelaw internships. She is now at what most consider to be the top law school in the country, and all the others from this ivy who are headed to the top law or med are 100% grit, drive, discipline.

Disagree.
Doctor and engineer are vocational careers. I’m happy you’re happy, but it’s really not that impressive.

-biglaw partner with a T3 law degree (and you’d be surprised how many biglaw lawyers are pissed that they were not wise enough to become the client and work in PE)…. if you know, you know. And you advise your children differently.

[Anonymous]

DP. What would be your advice to your child?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread has been wild to read. I am not in DC, but my kid attends a public high school in an affluent suburb on the west coast. Everyone I know has a college counselor. Yes, everyone. It's like orthodontics; yes, occasionally someone does not need it, but I think 80-90% of parents and kids could use some help and there's zero shame around using a college counselor. That said, it's a huge industry and there are many affordable options (unlike orthos).

It’s sad this board has been completely taken over by maga. They want moms stay home to take care of larlos’ college applications. They want to feed to moms fear and anxiety, that nothing is good enough until you drop everything professional and tend to a silly college admission game themselves.

huh? my kid is at an ivy unhooked and most of their friends there have dual working parent households. The vast majority of the kids who get ivy+ admissions from our HS are dual working parents, often at least one a doctor or lawyer. No one is staying home to be a college counselor to their kid. true top kids do not need paid college counseling services or extensive advice from mom or dad. they read all the websites of the schools on their own and from that one can get a great idea of what each school is seeking. tours and admission-officer sessions also give hints. top kids take notes and refer to them when writing apps.
you underestimate the level of preparedness and focus of the very top high schoolers.

THIS! If your kid can't do it on their own, they don't have what it takes. Sorry to inform you tiger parents that you can't force brilliance.

+++ and if you do micromanage them and pay someone big $ to try to force it ..what happens if they get lucky and get in to T10/ivy? they will be crushed by the competition once there especially if they want top law, top phD, med school, MBB, etc. the next level of the game is entirely different and your kid has to have the intelligence, drive & discipline just to keep above average at these places.

Not true at all. It’s how the world works.
Lots of people get their jobs and move on up through the world (MBB/PE/AM) without what you deemed to be the requisite “drive and discipline”.

My kids got their internships and jobs through connections…

Most definitely. But you are not going to win a case or perform a successful surgery because of a connection. For success in some disciplines you need to put up or shut up at some point. Some disciplines.

Exactly. My kids are premed and engineering and their summer internships have been extremely competitive and depend on prior research and recs from professors. The ivy name helps but not in competition with the other ivy students! It is how you do in class, what classes you have taken, lab, and research on campus, not who you know. Professors do not agree to write recs for everyone, especially the old-school ones. Same with one of their GFs who is prelaw: she worked her butt off to get the high gpa (3.9) her advisor said opened doors for the prestigious prelaw internships. She is now at what most consider to be the top law school in the country, and all the others from this ivy who are headed to the top law or med are 100% grit, drive, discipline.

Disagree.
Doctor and engineer are vocational careers. I’m happy you’re happy, but it’s really not that impressive.

-biglaw partner with a T3 law degree (and you’d be surprised how many biglaw lawyers are pissed that they were not wise enough to become the client and work in PE)…. if you know, you know. And you advise your children differently.

Wtf lawyer is a “vocation” as is every job. So is working in PE. Being president of a company. They are all vocations. Becoming an MD and becoming a phD engineer, especially at top schools, require some of the highest levels of intelligence to get accepted. Smart is the new rich, and those careers are often both. As are top lawyers . You are an idiot if you would discourage your kid from MD or engineering as somehow lesserthan law? I call BS that anyone in a white collar job from a top school would do that. Spouse is a lawyer and in PE. I am a doc. We know so many lawyers and docs and engineers (CEOs of startups, phD in R&D)They are all highly respected “white collar” careers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know this question has probably been asked many times before, but I wanted to reach out specifically to parents whose kids were admitted to a top 25 schools, either in the most recent admissions cycle or in the past few years.

Which college consultant (if any) did you use, and how was your experience?

Please, no snark , just hoping for genuine, firsthand recommendations or feedback from those who have real information to share.

Thanks in advance!

I’m not sure how this helps you, OP, but I’ll bite:
No consultant. DD has been a top test-taker/student since starting school. I believe her recs were very strong. She had several from veteran teachers who have known her for multiple years. DD handled the application process on her own with her (private) school’s college counselor. She participated in sports (was average) and competed nationally in one EC (was 4th place one year).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread has been wild to read. I am not in DC, but my kid attends a public high school in an affluent suburb on the west coast. Everyone I know has a college counselor. Yes, everyone. It's like orthodontics; yes, occasionally someone does not need it, but I think 80-90% of parents and kids could use some help and there's zero shame around using a college counselor. That said, it's a huge industry and there are many affordable options (unlike orthos).

It’s sad this board has been completely taken over by maga. They want moms stay home to take care of larlos’ college applications. They want to feed to moms fear and anxiety, that nothing is good enough until you drop everything professional and tend to a silly college admission game themselves.

huh? my kid is at an ivy unhooked and most of their friends there have dual working parent households. The vast majority of the kids who get ivy+ admissions from our HS are dual working parents, often at least one a doctor or lawyer. No one is staying home to be a college counselor to their kid. true top kids do not need paid college counseling services or extensive advice from mom or dad. they read all the websites of the schools on their own and from that one can get a great idea of what each school is seeking. tours and admission-officer sessions also give hints. top kids take notes and refer to them when writing apps.
you underestimate the level of preparedness and focus of the very top high schoolers.

THIS! If your kid can't do it on their own, they don't have what it takes. Sorry to inform you tiger parents that you can't force brilliance.

+++ and if you do micromanage them and pay someone big $ to try to force it ..what happens if they get lucky and get in to T10/ivy? they will be crushed by the competition once there especially if they want top law, top phD, med school, MBB, etc. the next level of the game is entirely different and your kid has to have the intelligence, drive & discipline just to keep above average at these places.

Not true at all. It’s how the world works.
Lots of people get their jobs and move on up through the world (MBB/PE/AM) without what you deemed to be the requisite “drive and discipline”.

My kids got their internships and jobs through connections…

Most definitely. But you are not going to win a case or perform a successful surgery because of a connection. For success in some disciplines you need to put up or shut up at some point. Some disciplines.

Exactly. My kids are premed and engineering and their summer internships have been extremely competitive and depend on prior research and recs from professors. The ivy name helps but not in competition with the other ivy students! It is how you do in class, what classes you have taken, lab, and research on campus, not who you know. Professors do not agree to write recs for everyone, especially the old-school ones. Same with one of their GFs who is prelaw: she worked her butt off to get the high gpa (3.9) her advisor said opened doors for the prestigious prelaw internships. She is now at what most consider to be the top law school in the country, and all the others from this ivy who are headed to the top law or med are 100% grit, drive, discipline.

Disagree.
Doctor and engineer are vocational careers. I’m happy you’re happy, but it’s really not that impressive.

-biglaw partner with a T3 law degree (and you’d be surprised how many biglaw lawyers are pissed that they were not wise enough to become the client and work in PE)…. if you know, you know. And you advise your children differently.

Wtf lawyer is a “vocation” as is every job. So is working in PE. Being president of a company. They are all vocations. Becoming an MD and becoming a phD engineer, especially at top schools, require some of the highest levels of intelligence to get accepted. Smart is the new rich, and those careers are often both. As are top lawyers . You are an idiot if you would discourage your kid from MD or engineering as somehow lesserthan law? I call BS that anyone in a white collar job from a top school would do that. Spouse is a lawyer and in PE. I am a doc. We know so many lawyers and docs and engineers (CEOs of startups, phD in R&D)They are all highly respected “white collar” careers.

Np. I think traditional CS/engineering (and undergrad business degrees) are absolutely vocational. They are not teaching you to think in interdisciplinary ways about big often nebulous ideas.

Doctor can major in Anthro? Lawyer can major in religion. Very interdisciplinary and the essence of a “liberal arts education”.

https://dornsife.usc.edu/news/stories/why-a-liberal-arts-degree-is-often-a-ticket-to-career-success/

Research why symbolic systems is one of the most popular majors at Stanford?

Oh - and- always go to the very best school you can get into.

[Anonymous]

My DS graduated from top 10 school recently and I wish we had used one and possibly he would be at top 5.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You font need a consultant for schools ranked 11-25. At this range different schools like different things.
U Chicago, Dartmouth, Emory, Vanderbilt love private students

UC, Uva, Umich be instate

Notre dame be catholic

Rice, CMU, WashU all about the test score

Etc.

This is an overstatement. My DD was admitted to Wash U TO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You font need a consultant for schools ranked 11-25. At this range different schools like different things.
U Chicago, Dartmouth, Emory, Vanderbilt love private students

UC, Uva, Umich be instate

Notre dame be catholic

Rice, CMU, WashU all about the test score

Etc.

This is an overstatement. My DD was admitted to Wash U TO.

Agree.