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Torn about whether to accept Mother's Day gift
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Anonymous
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My DH and kids very unexpectedly and thoughtfully gave me (well, gave the promise of) a ring that I've had my eye on for several years. DH wasn't able to get to the store to buy it so he had printed out a picture and included it in the card from him so there's nothing to actually return. I don't want to sound ungrateful or like I'm showing off, but I'm very torn on whether to accept the ring. It's not very expensive but it is not an insignificant amt of money for us. We actually would only be using our own money for half of the cost, as I'd just received my per diem from a work trip that could cover the other half. While I love jewelry and am touched by the thought, we obviously could use the money for other things. The other option is to buy a similar (but non-name brand) ring that would definitely be less expensive.
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Anonymous
| Just accept it. |
Anonymous
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keep it. it will always remind you how thoughtful your family was to give you something you wanted for many years.
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Anonymous
| I have a hard time spending money on jewelry so I would most likely return it for the less expensive piece. |
Anonymous
| I just can't get the image out of my mind about how returning or not accepting the ring might hurt your kids' feel gs and possibly your husband's. So not worth the risk and/or unintended life lesson. Keep it. |
Anonymous
| Feelings... |
Anonymous
| I would definitely keep it. |
Anonymous
This. |
Anonymous
| If your husband had been able to buy the ring in order to physically give it to you on Mother's Day you wouldn't be asking this. Keep it. Treasure it. Remind yourself what a special gift it is and don't tag negative or guilty feelings to it....it's not fair to your children, your husband, or yourself. |
Anonymous
Umm, your kids will NEVER know if you got the ring a Tiffany's or it was a knock-off. |
Anonymous
OP here. Reading all your comments, so thanks. Just wanted to clear up one thing (should've mentioned in my original post)...my kids are only 1 and not yet-3. They have no idea this ring is forthcoming...so I don't think it would hurt their feelings. DH, maybe, but not so much the kids. I got lovely items "made" by them from daycare 
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Anonymous
| I think if you take it back you will discourage your DH from doing something like this again. Which would be a bad idea IMO. |
Anonymous
I second this .. you might be back here in a few years complaining that he never buys you jewelry or just hands you the cash and tells you to buy what you want. |
Anonymous
| If I returned a ring that my husband got me as a gift, he would be really hurt. I would never in a million years do that to him. |
Anonymous
| OP, I have to agree with the PPs that it would hurt your DH's feelings at this point. I can 100% understand your misgivings, however. As we are paying for daycare and will soon be paying for daycare for 2 children, we have lots of things any extra money should be going to. We've been trying to save more and pay down our mortgage as much as possible so we can get out from being under water. We need to put more in our daughter's 529 plan. I feel guilty about extravagant presents from my DH even though I appreciate the gesture, but I can't get past the guilt. So, I always tell my DH ahead of time that I don't want any purchased gifts or I set price limits on things like Christmas spending. In general I have a rule of no spending for Hallmark holidays like Mothers Day or Valentine's Day. We try to stick to making gifts or doing something nice for each other. I don't think this means that my DH will never get me any nice jewelry one day when we are in a better financial situation. |